He walked.

His hands in his pockets.

He fixed his hair.

He stopped.

In the middle of the hallway.

A guy hit him.

He didn't move.

Not at all.

He couldn't.

He fell on his knees.

His eyes not there.

Not anymore.

I did not raise you like this!

Because the way you were trying to raise me was wrong.

Smack.

"SE-UNG!"

He wheezed, as if he had just gotten out of an icy cold ocean. He was feeling dizzy, swifting slightly. The waves had taken him far far away.

He didn't look into Sam's eyes. Her big, bubbly, friendly, brown eyes. He kept staring at the ground; full of thousands of stranger dirt, gums, bread crusts and dampness.

"I..."

He felt like he could pass out.... In any second, if he kept speaking. He could see the ghost of his past strangling him, strangling him, strangling him.

He felt a tiny hand on his back. "Don't speak. Come, get some fresh air..."

He raised a hand. "I'm alright." He stood up, trying to look into Sam's eyes to ensure that he was alright. He could feel an odd heaviness rise from his throat to the top of his head as he did, making him feel dizzy. He saw dark spots twinkling and blocking his sight, he blinked to make them go away.

Sam grabbed his arm. "No you're not, follow me." He decided to listen to her, or else he had a risk of getting kicked by his crotch by this tiny human.

They walked out of the building, heading to the garden. Sam spotted an empty bank and made him sit down.

"I've told you, I'm alright. Just felt dizzy for a second." It was not a lie, at least.

Maybe not the part where he told her that he was alright... Maybe.

She took a bottle of water out of her bag and handed it to him. "Drink." He sighed and did so. The water tasted weird.

"Take deep breaths. It's alright." She placed her hand on his back. He closed his eyes, clenching his fists.

He could feel something rushing to his eyes and nose... Then down to his throat...

He let it go. He let the tears go, it was unhealthy to not. They were meant to be released, so he did so.

Sam gently patted his back, then hugged him tightly. Her tiny body was strong yet warm.

"It's alright, it's alright... Deep breaths..." She fanned him with her hands and then gently brushed his hair with her tiny, short fingers. He could feel warmth overtaking his body.

He tried to take a deep breath as she told him, forcing his body to stretch. However, the tightness of his chest won.

Sam broke the hug, staring at him. He couldn't see her face yet he knew that she had that same look on her face. Her mouth slightly ajar, her strong eyebrows curled like worms, her big dark eyes sparkling with hope, her face going slightly red, swallowing her freckles...

"I'm-" he managed to take a deep breath. "I'm alright. For- For real." He kept taking deep breaths, as his sobbing slowly died.

"Gosh... You look pale again... You should visit th-"

He bent forwards and threw everything up. His throat was burning with the acid of his stomach, he didn't want to swallow the horrible taste back. He spat on the ground, shaking.

She handed him the bottle again. "Wash your mouth." He did so. Then, he clenched his eyes, his whole body shivering. Shivering as if he was left against the biting cold of the harsh winter.

"It's alright, I'm calling a teacher." Sam told him. He slightly nodded, then opened his eyes to watch her as she ran inside the building.

She had gotten used to it. Seung thought so, at least.

He held his stomach, not sure if he had to throw up again. He felt cold, yet he was sweating.

He spat on the ground again. He leaned backwards, staring at the sky for a while. It was tinged with a dead purple.

He liked that color. He had a t-shirt which was also a dead purple. He liked that t-shirt. It represented that beauty could be cold sometimes. Yet simple. Modern.

It represented his soul.

***

He spent his biology class by sleeping. Not with his eyes closed, of course. His eyes were open -though he was having hard times to keep them like that- so he looked like he was listening to the teacher with interest. His eyes followed the teacher as she randomly walked around the classroom, yet he didn't get a word.

He bumped his head on his desk and closed his eyes as soon as the bell rang. His eyelids had became heavier, harder to control. His entire body begged for sleep.

"Hey, stayed up until 5 am again?" he heard a guy ask as he poked his head.

"Sod off..." he managed to say, trying to sweep away from the reality. He kept poking him. "What had I told you you asshole? Go to bed early for once!"

He pushed his hand away. "As if I had a choice, Malcolm..."

Malcolm sighed. "What? Was drawing instead of sleeping so necessary?" he asked. Seung raised his head, his eyes barely open. "Exactly." His head fell on his desk again.

"Why don't you draw earlier then?" he started to poke his head again. Seung sighed. "Because you need motivation to draw and my motivation hits me after 1 am... Could you please leave me alone now?"

Malcolm ruffled his hair. "Nope. Stop being a whiny emo." Seung lifted his head up and raised an eyebrow. "That whiny emo's gonna kick your coward ass if you won't leave him alone."

"Or, this angry imp will kick your crotch until you become unable to reproduce."

Sam had appeared right behind Malcolm. Her arms were crossed, her head was lifted up so that he could look into Malcolm's eyes.

Malcolm raised his hands. "Welp- nope!" He ruffled Sam's hair. "Way too brutal. It'd be better if you threw me into a pool of lava."

Sam grinned and elbowed his stomach. "You idiot." Malcolm laughed and wrapped his arm around her neck. "I'll always fear this tiny woman. " Seung grinned. "You better."

He decided to sit up, since those two would not let him sleep. He leaned backwards with his chair, crossing his legs.

"You guys are both idiots..." Sam muttered. Malcolm grinned. "Oops, Majesty Sam is mad." Sam stepped on his foot. "Oh yes she is. Now, shut up."

Seung yawned, his whole body stretching. "Wh-Whats the next les-son?" Sam poked his stomach. "Math. Amazing."

Malcolm sighed. "Kill me please... No math... No math..." Seung raised his eyebrows.

"Are you guys kidding me? Math is extremely easy in America! Piece of cake!" Sam shrugged. "Still, boring. And don't even compare Korea to America..."

Seung sighed. "Still, math is the easiest in America. You learn nothing. Therefore, I suggest you to stop complaining."

Malcolm closed his mouth with his skinny hand. "Shut up, math genius." Seung pushed his hand away. "What? Have you heard me, Malcolm? Math is extremely easy in America so I'm not a math genius... I'm just not dumb."

"Alright, alright, enough with this cockiness..." Sam said. "You're secretly a math genius and we know it."

Seung sighed. "Alright then..."

"Aren't all Asians smart though?" a different voice asked. It was Amanda. Seung immediately tried to avoid eye contact with her.

"Well that was racist..." he said, playing with his pencil. Amanda leaned on his desk, trying to catch his eyes. "Why don't we discuss this after school, at Bronze Café?"

Seung sighed. "Not interested." He could feel Sam's anger even if he couldn't see her face.

Amanda leaned closer to him. "Why not? People will think that you're gay." she said, reciting every word slowly.

Seung kept avoiding eye contact. "I'm not gay. I'm bisexual. Which means that I'm attracted to both genders. Tell them that."

Amanda laughed. It wasn't a normal laugh- it was more like a forced one. Forced to attract him.

"You're funny. Why not hanging out with me? Have I done something wrong?" she touched his chin. He pushed her hand away. "The reason for that, is, that I'm not quite interested in your existence around me. I don't really think that I'd enjoy hanging out with you and your attention seeker 'friends'."

Sam took a step towards her. "I guess you should leave him alone now..."

Amanda raised a brow, her caramel hair falling on her caramel skin. She looked at Sam, with underestimation covering her face.

"What now? Are you jealous? You don't want me to steal your crush?"

Sam pulled her close by grabbing her shirt. "I don't have a crush on him!" the entire classroom started to stare at them.

"I don't get attracted to every male human I see and try everything to get their attention, unlike you! He's my brother!"

Amanda laughed. That fake laugh again. "Don't try to hide your crush, midget. It's not cool."

If Malcolm was a milisecond late, then Sam would've had killed Amanda. He grabbed her by her arms, pulling her away as she tried to kick him.

Seung stood up. "I'm kindly asking you to leave this area, before further problems occur." he was still trying to avoid eye contact.

"What? I've even learned some Chinese words for you!" she said, placing her hand on his chest. He pushed her away.

"I'm not Chinese. I'm Korean. I guess you would've known that if you were interested in me that much and had an actual, functioning brain instead of a flower pot!"

Noises started to rise around the classroom. Everyone was watching the fight, wondering how far they could go.

"You'll regret this, hun." Amanda said, whipping her hair and walking away like a worm.

Malcolm finally put Sam down. "Why didn't you let me kill her?" she yelled into Malcolm's ear. Seung rolled his eyes. "And you are the one who tells me to avoid violence, no matter what..."

Sam brushed her clothes. "That is for you. I know how to protect myself from the teacher. Plus, I use my ADHD as an excuse for that."

"But-"

"Shhhh."

Seung shrugged and walked towards his locker. "Alright." Sam followed him.

"You're mad about something... I can tell by your eyes..." she said, walking after him with fast steps to catch him. Seung sighed, stopped and turned around.

" I AM, ALRIGHT? I'M MAD! NOW LEAVE ME AND MY PATHETIC EXISTENCE ALONE!"

Sam stared at him, not knowing how to act. Her eyes were starting to sparkle again, Seung knew what was coming.

He covered his face with his hands and shook his head. "No... Sorry..." He looked at Sam again, as he watched her face shattering in front of him.

He pulled her close and hugged her tightly. "Sorry..." He could feel warm tears wetting his shirt. He kissed her head, patted her back. He felt as if a tennis ball was inside his throat, trying to get out of his body.

The bell rang as they stood in the middle of the hallway, hugging. He could not stand seeing her like that, no...

Sam gently broke the hug. "Let's- Let's go and get our books..."

They did not say a word until the next lesson ended.

Seung didn't know why, he didn't know why his brain was making him act so differently all the time. Even in the middle of his laughter, an urge to scream was filling his body.

He just didn't know why.