It's been so long,

Since I let myself cry.

I told myself I didn't

Deserve to be crying

About my problems when

So many others had it worse.

I just soldiered on.

I tried to keep pushing on,

I tried to be strong.

But it's been so long since I've been me.

Since I've been happy.

This huge battle is so enormous,

I feel like I'm fighting constantly.

But,

It's always one against fifty million.

And my one doesn't really have a chance.

It's harsh reality.

Not everybody's mind is all sprinkles and sunshine.

I'm just not good enough.

My dad implied it perfectly.

My efforts aren't good enough.

Nothing I do is good enough.

But it's been so long,

Since I've let myself cry.

But that's not the real truth.

The real truth is that it's not that I never cry.

I do.

I just never let anyone see.