Somebody's Knocking

Me: Okay Mother Nature.
Me: I would really appreciate it if your appearance could be convenient this month.
Me: Because I'm kinda busy and I don't have time for anything you want to throw at me.
Mother Nature: *chews gum* Okay honey. *throws fast pitch of period cramps at my gut*
Me: OW *falls over*
Mother Nature: You literally thought so hard.

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