I'M GONNA GO BARF FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER.

[ 6.01 — 6.02 ]

"Run faster, Kitty!"

"Shut the fuck up, Teddy. I'm dying!"

It was a patrol night, and that meant every available member of the Scooby gang was roaming around the cemetery. That led to the group that consisted of Kitty, Teddy, Spike, Tara, and Giles chasing after a large, newly emerged vampire. He was moving quickly and steadily between the headstones, somehow managing to escape despite the larger group that was after him.

When they realized they had no idea which way he turned, Spike groaned in annoyance. "Ted and I are never gonna get anything killed with you lot holding me back."

"Cardio hard," Kitty said, gasping for air as they came to a stop. In fact, the only ones not winded were Teddy and Spike.

Tara was still panting as she spoke up. "I thought the big ones were supposed to tire more easily."

"No, that's over-the-hill shopkeepers," Spike told her sarcastically.

"I'm fine," Giles said, leaning against a headstone. "I just need to... to die for a minute."

Spike looked at Tara. "It was that powder you blew at him — made him rabbit off."

"It's sorbis root, it was supposed to confuse him, but... it just kinda made him peppy," she said, earning an eye roll from him. "It's not supposed to mix with anything. You think he might be taking prescription medication?"

"Yeah, that must be it," he said sarcastically.

"Good god, I hope he doesn't try to operate heavy machinery," Teddy joked, laughing with Spike.

"Yeah, we could all be in real—"

Spike was cut off when they all heard Willow speaking in their minds. "Guys, heads up. The vampire's circling back towards you, six o'clock. Try to drive him back towards the Van Elton crypt."

"Van Elton," Teddy repeated.

"Is that the one with the cute little gargoyles?" Tara asked.

"No," Kitty said, shaking her head. "It's got the Lord of the Rings looking guy with the sword."

As they were looking around, they spotted the vampire running past their field of vision. "Left, make him go left!" Willow instructed.

Giles quickly threw his ax, which thudded into a tree right by the vampire's face, causing it to turn and flee left. After sharing a look, the five of them booked it, not wanting to lose him again.

But Buffybot reached the vampire first, punching the vampire clean in the face.

"Big, fast, and dumb. Just the way I like 'em," Buffybot quipped, standing over the vampire. She kicked him in the face as he tried to get up and moved to stake him, only for the vampire to catch her arm and hit her.

The others finally caught up. Tara and Giles held the vampire's arms back while Spike punched him. However, the vampire then head-butted him, making him stagger back. Buffy ran at the big vampire, who managed to throw Tara and Giles off him. Buffybot came at him, but he was anticipating it. He lifted her easily and swung her around, managing to kick Kitty in the face with her legs. Then he threw her at Tara, who ducked in time because of Willow's warning.

Teddy swung his ax at the vampire, managing to get a few good hacks. But then the vampire grabbed it and used the momentum to spin Teddy around and pin him to the ground. He held the ax handle to his throat, cutting off his air supply.

"Spike!" Teddy choked out, as the vampire was the only one not still recovering from any bad hits. Spike jumped on the vampire's back, but he was so big that he hardly noticed and shrugged Spike off. "Spike!"

Spike sighed and pulled out a cigarette and his lighter. He heard Willow screaming in his head. "What are you doing? Help him!"

He lit the cigarette. "I did."

The back of the vampire's shirt had suddenly caught on fire, and it spread quickly. He let go of Giles and staggered back. In only a few moments, his whole body was engulfed in flames and he turned into a pile of dust. After taking a drag from the cigarette, Spike sauntered over to Teddy and gave him a hand up.

"You could've clued me in on your genius plan while he choked me out," Teddy muttered, brushing the dust off himself.

Spike rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to speak, but Kitty came over and hit the back of his head. "Meanie," she said, glaring at him playfully. "T, you alright?"

"Fine," he said, rubbing his neck. "But you should withhold all handholding and kisses from your boy toy."

"I'm not a boy toy," Spike grumbled. He also reached for Kitty's hand to hold, intertwining their fingers. "And no, she shouldn't—"

"Guys," Willow said telepathically, "help Xander and Anya over by the Anderson tomb."

"That's the cute gargoyles!" Kitty exclaimed as they all ran off to help the two.

Buffybot had already headed that way as soon as the other vampire was dusted. The others arrived just as the vampire jumped off the ground and blocked a kick from Buffybot. They exchanged several blows before he picked her up. Teddy ran in and punched the vampire in the stomach, making him drop the bot. After receiving a kick from the Cupid, the vampire threw Teddy back several feet, who landed by Xander and Anya. Buffybot was back and kicking the vampire in the face, knocking him to the ground. She managed to stake him just as he started sitting up.

"That'll put marzipan in your pie plate, bingo!" Buffybot said, grinning triumphantly. The entire gang looked at the robot.

"I think Buffybot is having a stroke," Kitty said while helping Teddy stand.

"Yeah, what's with the Dadaism, Red?" Spike asked her.

"Yeah, she says that pie thing every time she stakes a vamp now," Tara added.

Willow shrugged sheepishly. "I-I don't know, I was trying to program in some new puns and I kinda ended up with word salad."

"I think it's funny," Buffybot said brightly. It earned an eye roll from most of the group who began walking.

"You are funny, Buffybot," Kitty told her. In the three weeks that she and Teddy had been back in Sunnydale, Buffybot grew on her a little. She still thought it was creepy, and the robot made her miss the real Buffy even more, but she was trying to make the best out of such a depressing situation.

"It's a glitch, I'll fix it," Willow assured them.

"We just can't have her messing up in front of the wrong person," Giles said. "Or the wrong thing. We, we need the, the world and the underworld to believe that Buffy is alive and well."

"And I will therefore fix it. I got her head back on, didn't I? And I got her off those knock-knock jokes," she said.

"Ooh, who's there?" Buffybot asked excitedly.

Buffybot was ignored, as she often was when not needed. "You know if we want her to be exactly—"

Teddy cut Xander off bitterly. "She'll never be exactly."

"I know," Xander said sadly.

"The only really real Buffy is really Buffy," Willow added, frowning.

"And she's gone," Giles said, sighing.

They all walked on, feeling a little sadder than when they started for the night. They left Buffybot behind, who looked at their retreating figures expectantly. "'If we want her to be exactly she'll never be exactly I know the only really real Buffy is really Buffy and she's gone' who?"

Xander smiled at the ground before glancing to the side at Kitty. "This reminds me of having to teach you how jokes worked."

"Yes," Giles said, sighing. "Because heaven forbid a group have more than one with a Xander-based sense of humor."

♡︎

The following morning, Teddy was over at the Summers' house. He was helping Tara make breakfast before planning to drive Dawn and Buffybot to the school, where Parent-Teacher Day was being held. He was going to make sure the robot didn't screw up and get Dawn put in foster care.

"Morning," Willow said, coming into the kitchen.

"Morning!" Buffybot greeted cheerfully. She was making sandwiches for Dawn's lunch.

"I was thinking we could go over your programming again," Willow said to her.

"Again?" Tara questioned. "You've done enough, sweetie. She's either ready to face this thing or she's not."

"She's right," Teddy added. "Don't overwork yourself. There's only so much that can be done to her programming."

Then Dawn entered and took a seat at the breakfast bar. Tara smiled at her. "Oh, um, here's some juice, and pancakes are on the way. Funny shapes or rounds?"

"Rounds are fine."

"Oh, I can't make them round," Teddy spoke up, focusing on the pan. Unlike Kitty, he was a good cook. That didn't mean the food was pretty though.

"Uh, what's up with the mega 'witches?" Dawn then asked.

"Oh, I don't know if you can call us mega, Willow maybe—"

"No," she interrupted. "I mean... who's gonna eat all that?"

They all turned to Buffyboy. Instead of making two sandwiches, there was a huge pile of at least eleven, and she was in the middle of making another. Tara quickly grabbed the bot's hands to stop her.

"Oh! Oops, um, she wanted to help, and I got her started, but then I forgot to un-start," Tara said. The bot nodded in understanding and put the sandwich-making materials down.

"House of chicks, relax. I am a man, and I have a tool," Xander announced as he came in through the side door. He then held up a toolbox when he saw the amused looks on their faces. "Tools. Lots of plural tools. In my, uh... toolbox."

"Ah, guess I gotta respond to they/them until I get more tools," Teddy said, shaking his head in defeat.

"I'll let ya keep being a he/they," Xander said, waving him off. Then he eyed the pile of sandwiches hungrily. "Ah! Sandwiches. Excellent. Men like sandwiches." Buffybot smiled happily and handed him an entire stack of sandwiches.

"Help yourself. Really," Willow said as he dug right in. "So what brings you so early, your macho-ness?"

"I brought that soldering wire you wanted for BuffyBot's tune-up," he explained.

"Your funny shapes, m'lady," Teddy said, bringing over a plate of pancakes to Dawn.

The phone then rang, and Buffybot perked up excitedly. "I'll get it!"

"No!" Teddy, Willow, Tara, and Dawn all spoke at the same time and moved to intercept her before she could get to the phone.

"Um, it could be my dad," Dawn said, looking at Willow. "He said he'd call today."

"I'll just say hello. He's my biological ancestor," Buffybot said.

Willow shook her head and answered the phone. "Hello? Hey, Anya." Buffybot looked disappointed and moved back toward Teddy, now uninterested. "Really? That's fantastic!" Willow asked, looking at the others. "Uh, Anya found that thing, for tonight."

Xander looked nervously at Buffybot, Dawn, and Teddy. "Yeah? Great."

"And you're her sweet cookie-face," Willow added, grimacing.

"I go by many names."

"Well, what's tonight?" Dawn asked.

"Yeah, what thing?" Teddy asked curiously. There wasn't a Scooby meeting or anything planned.

"Uh, um, double date," Tara told him. Then she looked at Dawn. "Kitty and Spike'll be here with you."

"You know, Buffy... bot, maybe you should let the machine - uh, the other machine, answer the phone from now on. Okay?" Willow told her carefully.

Buffybot frowned. "Is my phone manner not correct?"

"It's perfect," Tara told her. "It's just we can't take the chance that Mr. Summers might talk to you and know something's wrong."

"See, if he thought the real Buffy was gone, he could take Dawn away," Xander explained.

"And I wanna stay here, with you and Willow and Tara," Dawn told her. "Understand?"

"I do!" Buffybot said, grinning. "I want you to stay here as well. You're my sister!"

The bot moved around the counter and hugged Dawn a little too tight. She was surprised but hugged her back, pleased by it. Teddy watched with concern, knowing it wasn't healthy for the Buffybot to be bonding with Dawn like this.

"So. Excellent. We're agreed. Sit your robo-self down so we can get to work," Xander said, having Buffy take a seat. "We gotta fix up those fighting skills pronto."

"Actually, we have bigger worries than her fighting skills today," Willow told him.

"Way bigger," Tara added.

"I guess," he said, shrugging. "Depends on how highly you prize punning."

"I'm serious, Xander. Buffybot is about to face her most dangerous challenge ever," Willow told him.

"Program her to be the most embarrassing mom there can be," Teddy said, smirking at Dawn. "Have her pinch Dawnie's cheeks and wipe syrup off her."

"I don't get syrup — oops," Dawn muttered, feeling embarrassed as she looked down to see syrup on her top. "I'll go change."

♡︎

While Teddy was making sure Buffybot didn't screw up at the school — who was actually doing quite well — Kitty was at the Magic Box. With the Cupids back, Giles pushed his return to England back a bit, but not completely. No matter how much Kitty and Teddy talked with him about it, he was still dead set on leaving, even if just for a few months.

After losing his Slayer, the Watcher needed a break from this lifestyle.

So, now that Kitty didn't have a job, she was free to spend any moment not with Spike at the shop. It was under the pretense of helping, but she just wanted as much quality time with Giles as possible before he left — whenever that was.

"Anya, this register report for January looks a bit off," Giles said, looking over his paperwork. Anya stopped dusting to look at him. "Pull the files again."

Anya put down her duster and quickly walked over to his desk, frowning. "Are you mad at me?"

"I mean, he's frequently annoyed at you, but I don't think he's mad," Kitty spoke up. She was sitting on the floor by Giles' feet and eating some Cheetos.

"Mad?" Giles questioned, confused by Anya's hurt expression. "No, I'm-I'm—"

"Well, then why are you torturing me? You know, I used to punish people like this when I was a demon. I made them double-check spreadsheets for all eternity," she said.

Giles rolled his eyes at her dramatics. "I'm sorry if you resent my authority, but I won't feel comfortable leaving here until I know that absolutely everything—"

Anya cut him off while grabbing a small statue off the desk. "You're taking the Ramadan effigy?" she asked, clearly upset.

Again, he rolled his eyes. "It's not inventory, it's my personal collection," he said, snatching the statue back.

"Oh, huh. Aren't you Mister Dicey Semantics," she muttered indignantly. "So, what, you think you can just take anything you want?"

Anya grabbed the statue back from Giles, which made him angry. He tried to grab it back, and they both pulled at it, getting into a tugging war.

"Give it!" Anya whined.

"No, you give it!" Giles ordered. She began smacking him with her free hand. "Ow! Ow!" He tried to fend off her smacking hand with his other one. Kitty continued to watch, licking the Cheeto dust off her fingers. "Ow!"

Xander, who'd been unloading boxes in the other part of the store, heard their fighting and came over. "Okay, when I'm marveling at the immaturity... be scared." The two stopped fighting to look at him but didn't let go of the statue. "Anya, Giles is gonna leave the store to you when he goes. What more do you want?"

"I'm not leaving the store to anyone," he informed them. "I'm going to England. I'm not dead, I'm still a partner." Then Giles yanked the statue away from Anya.

"Silent overseas partner," she muttered.

"Who you should be very nice to unless you want to end up working at Video Hut," Xander said to her. Giles gave Anya a tentative smile, who returned it with an obviously fake grin. As soon as she turned away, she scowled and walked off with Xander.

"I know you're worried, but Anya will take good care of things," Kitty told Giles as he tucked the statue away. "She's the only one that actually wants you to go, though."

"I thought you and Teddy would be jumping for joy. You'll finally get your own rooms," he said. There wasn't a chance of Kitty convincing him to stay, so they didn't even begin the argument.

"Yes, and you're conveniently doing this in a way so that you don't have to help move any of the furniture," she noted, narrowing her eyes playfully. They wouldn't move things around until Giles was officially gone.

"Yes," he said, smirking. "That was by design. I'm sure between Buffybot and Spike, all heavy things will be taken care of."

♡︎

That night, Kitty and Spike were on babysitting duty while the other couples were on a double date. Of course, it wasn't a real double date, but the Cupids, Dawn, and Spike were all unaware of the plan to resurrect Buffy — the plan they'd be carrying out the following night.

But for now, all was calm as Dawn told the babysitters all about Buffybot's impressive performance at the Parent-Teacher Day. "So my homeroom teacher, Ms. Lefcort, was like, 'Your sister's an example to us all.' Hmm! She wanted to make it National Buffy Day."

"Makes sense," Spike said, shrugging. Kitty was lying across the couch with a pizza box sitting on her stomach. Her legs were on Spike's lap, who'd been rubbing random patterns on her ankle with his thumb as they listened to Dawn.

"It does?" Dawn questioned while reaching for another slice of pizza.

"Yeah, she responded to Buffybot because a robot is predictable. Boring. Perfect teacher's pet. That's all schools are, you know. Just factories, spewing out mindless little automatons," he said. Then he noted Dawn's interested look and cringed. "Who go on to be... very... valuable and productive members of society, and you should go. Because Buffy would want you to."

"Check. One mindless automaton coming up," she responded.

"School's for nerds," Kitty muttered. "I'm an idiot and barely graduated and am just fine now."

"You're not an idiot," Spike told her, flicking her ankle as punishment for saying it.

"Hmm, you're right," she said, smiling fondly. "Can't be two idiots in a relationship." Spike scoffed and playfully rolled his eyes. "So, Dawnster, how about you and Spikey clean up while I set up the karaoke machine?"

"Well, uh, Willow and Tara said they'd be back early," Dawn told them as Kitty sat up. "You don't really have to hang. I mean, if you're bored or wanna do coupley stuff."

"We're not, and yeah, we do," Spike told her.

"If we left you alone to do coupley stuff, they'd all take turns to stake him," Kitty added.

"But I'm fine alone. It's not like anyone's coming after me. I'm not the key," she said as Kitty moved to get the karaoke machine out of the corner. "Or if I am, I don't open anything anymore. It's over. Remember?"

"I'm not leaving you here by yourself, so forget it," Spike told her, beginning to pick up the empty cups from dinner.

"Well, I'm just saying—"

"No, Dawn," Kitty interrupted firmly. Then she softened her voice. "We aren't leaving you to get hurt. Not again." She and Dawn shared a look before the younger one nodded. "Go put the leftover pizza up, please."

"Yeah," she said, beginning to help Spike clean up.

"Find something by the Ramones," Spike told Kitty. "Need to get Niblet hooked on something good instead of that Britney Spears."

"Do not diss Britney!" Dawn exclaimed.

"Shut your whore mouth, Spike!" Kitty said over her shoulder.

It made Spike chuckle as they both came to the young singer's defense. He and Dawn both went to the kitchen to get everything put away. It was quiet for a minute as he tossed the paper plates and Dawn found the ziplock bags to stash the leftover slices in.

"You know," she began hesitantly, "I know you only stick around for Kitty, and everyone else hates you, but I don't hate having you around."

"I mean, I don't think Anya and Tara hate me," he said, rinsing the cups out. He glanced back at Dawn. "You're not so bad yourself."

"And I'm also glad that you and Kitty worked things out," she added. "You both just seem... happier. I didn't even know you could smile before seeing you two together. It's kind of funny. Who'd've thought when you first showed up in Sunnydale."

"Love's a funny thing sometimes," Spike said softly. If all those years ago, that night he was spying on Buffy in the Bronze and Kitty tripped right into him, someone told him he'd fall in love with the little Cupid, he'd have laughed in their face. Then killed them. Now, he just wished it hadn't taken him so long to realize how special she was. "Won't be too long before you understand it."

Then the sound of someone tapping a microphone hit their ears. Kitty had finished setting up the karaoke machine and turned the volume all the way up. "Ahem," she cleared her throat. Spike and Dawn shared an amused look. "Ladies and Gentlemen, take your seats. The show is about to begin."

Dawn giggled and pushed Spike toward the living room. The music kicked on before they even made it around the corner. Baby, I Love You by the Ramones began playing loudly. Kitty was snapping along to the beat while holding the microphone up to her face.

"Have I ever told you how good it feels to hold you? It isn't easy to explain," Kitty sang, not entirely on key. Dawn giggled as Kitty began dancing around the living room. "And though I'm really tryin', I think I may start cryin'. My heart can't wait another day."

Kitty pointed at Spike and shimmied over to him. "When you kiss me I just gotta, kiss me I just gotta, kiss me I just gotta say, baby, I love you, come on baby." He grinned and took her hand once she was close enough, spinning her around. "Baby, I love you. Baby I love, I love only you."

"I can't live without you. I love everything about you. I can't help it if I feel this way. Oh, I'm so glad I found you." As Kitty moved to the second verse, she pulled Dawn to dance, wrapping her arms around her as they swayed. "I want my arms around you. I love to hear you call my name. Oh, tell me that you feel, tell me that you feel, tell me that you feel the same. Baby, I love you, come on baby. Baby, I love you. Baby I love, I love only you."

And for the first time in a while in the living room of the Summers' house, Dawn was happy. Life without Buffy was hard — even harder with Buffybot in the house all the time, though she'd never admit it to the others. But moments like these with Kitty made the young girl believe that one day, maybe she'd be alright.

♡︎

Buffybot had a small malfunction when she was out Slaying that night. Luckily, Willow managed to patch her up and fix the glitches in her programming. The next day, she was back to practicing fighting techniques with Giles and Teddy. She performed each rapid sequence flawlessly — it was impossible for her to mess up or even get tired.

Giles, on the other hand, was tired. He was holding the pads she was punching. Soon, he'd need to switch out with Teddy, who was on the other side of the room, far away as he hit a punching bag. "That was splendid. Now, try it again only this time, remember your breathing," Giles said, panting a bit from exhaustion.

Buffybot looked at him, confused for a moment. But she took in a deep breath and blew it through her lips in one long breath as she hit the target again and again. Teddy rolled his eyes as Giles cleared his throat. Anya was watching from the door.

"No, uh, that's good, but, uh, think of the breath as chi. Air as a, a life source."

"I don't require oxygen to live," she informed him.

"Of course, strictly speaking, but—"

Anya then fully entered the room to interrupt. "Um, maybe you should stick to the standard drill. You know you don't want her to blow another gasket."

"I'm testing her responses after her injury. I see no harm in imparting a little Eastern philosophy," he explained.

"Well, I just think that the concept of chi might be a little, you know, hard for her to grasp," Anya said. Giles dropped his arms and put his hands on his hips, annoyed with Anya's input. "You know, she's not the descendant of a long line of mystical warriors. She's the descendant of a toaster oven."

"Yes, well, I appreciate your input, Anya, but I think Buffybot has responded nicely to our sessions," he said, and Buffybot smiled happily.

"Well, you're the boss. Still," Anya muttered before leaving them.

"Would you like to test me again?" Buffybot asked when he didn't put his hands back up.

"No, perhaps we should call it a day. Your responses are fine," he said, removing the padded targets and going to get a bottle of water. He glanced at Buffybot, who was just watching him. "Perhaps Anya's right. Perhaps I am trying to teach you as if you were..."

"Human?" she asked, not knowing how bothered they all were by the fact that she wasn't real.

"Yes," he said uncomfortably.

"I like your teachings," she said. "Every Slayer needs her Watcher."

"He's not your Watcher," Teddy said a bit harshly as he took off his gloves, finished with the punching bag. Then he stalked toward the door, clearly not in a good mood. "And you're not a Slayer."

Buffybot frowned as he left. "Teddy doesn't like me."

"W-what makes you say that?" Giles asked.

"He never looks at me, not even when speaking to me. And he won't train with me." The problem with Buffybot was that she was programmed to think and act like Buffy. Sure, the feelings may have been synthetic, but the robot knew she was meant to have a closer friendship with Teddy than this. And because they weren't close, it told her programming that something was wrong. "I think that makes me sad." As sad as she could actually be, at least.

"T-Teddy, no, he thinks you're... swell," Giles lied. "And, well, what you said before, I'm not so sure."

"What do you mean?" she asked, frowning.

"Nothing." But then he sighed. "I just can't help but wonder if... she would have been better off without me. Buffy."

"I don't think that's true. You were very helpful to her," Buffybot reminded him.

Giles laughed humorlessly. "Right. Yes, I was a perfect Watcher. I did what any good Watcher would do. Got my Slayer killed in the line of duty."

"Oh, that wasn't your fault," she assured him.

"Of course not," he said sadly. Though he still blamed himself more than the others knew. "That's how all Slayer-Watcher relationships end, isn't it? She's gone. And not even Kitty and Teddy need me to take care of them. I did my job — both of them."

"Well, then why are you still here?" she asked innocently.

Why was he?

♡︎

Spike was gently pulled from his peaceful sleep by the sound of Kitty humming. It was the same Ramones song from the night before, but in a much softer sound now. It put a smile on his face, which was hidden by the pillow his face was pressed against.

After finishing with Dawn, Kitty stayed the night at the crypt, which she'd been doing every other night it seemed. He wouldn't have it any other way.

Another sensation gathered his attention once he was more awake, confusing him.

"Kitten, what're you doing?" he asked sleepily, not moving. He could feel light pressure on his bare back, like she was tracing her finger across it, except it wasn't her finger. He could smell the ink of the Sharpie.

Kitty didn't respond right away, finishing her work. Then she leaned down to kiss his shoulder. "I'm writing on you."

"I'd gathered that," he said, a bit amused. "What are you writing on me?"

"A poem."

"A poem?"

"Mhmm. One that can rival the beauty and meaning of the first one you ever wrote me," she informed him matter-of-factly.

Spike craned his head but knew he wouldn't be able to see it. But he did spot Kitty's wings, which she only ever had out when in a good mood. "Alright. Let's hear it, Kitten."

"It's a haiku," she said before clearing her throat. "Hands made to hold yours." As she spoke, she trailed a hand down his arm until she reached his hand to hold. "Lips to steal your breath away." Kitty pressed kisses down his spine. "You stole my Care Bear." At the last five-syllable line, she grabbed her Love-a-Lot bear that was by his head and hit him with it.

Spike laughed loudly before turning on his back and blocking all of Kitty's hits. He then snatched the Care Bear away easily and held it back. Kitty crawled on him to try and reach it. When she couldn't get it back, she pouted down at him.

"This is the third time I've brought him back home only for you to steal him when I'm not there," she said, sighing forlornly.

Spike lifted his head just enough to kiss her pouty lips. Then he smirked. "I steal him because I know you'll come back for him."

Kitty shifted so that she was laying on him, resting her head on his chest. "I'd come back anyway. Always will."

At that answer, Spike stopped holding the Care Bear hostage. Once it was on his chest, Kitty swiped it from him and held it in between them. He wrapped his arms around her waist, keeping her close.

"Did you really write all that on my back?" he asked, smiling. Kitty took a deep breath and the tips of her wings brushed his arm for a moment.

"Not the last line," she said, shaking her head. "Hands made to hold yours. Lips to steal your breath away. My heart beats for yours." Spike smiled fondly, not thinking it was possible to love her more. But she saw the smile and thought he was amused. "It took me a very long time to think of that, so no laughing at how cheesy it is, William. I barely passed the poetry section in eleventh grade."

"No, not laughing," he promised. Spike's fingers slipped under his shirt that she was wearing, tracing random shapes against her hip. "You make me so happy."

Kitty looked up at him, eyes practically sparkling with love. "You make me happy too. And you will forever and ever and ever."

"Ugh." They both quickly sat up, realizing that someone made their way down to the lower level. It was Xander who spoke, and the rest of the gang was either behind him or peeking down from the hatch on the upper level. "I'm gonna go barf forever and ever and ever."

"Oh, get the bloody hell out!" Spike snapped, his happy mood gone. "This isn't a free show!"

Kitty nudged Spike to keep him quiet before looking at the others. "What's wrong? Why are you all here?"

Teddy, who was the only one comfortable coming near the bed while Spike was shirtless, held out a piece of paper. "G left this at the shop."

With a frown, Kitty took the note and read it. And tears welled in her eyes as she did. 'I've gone. Not one for long goodbyes. I thought it best to slip out quietly. Love to you all, Giles.'

"Oh, that bitch!" Kitty exclaimed, scrambling out of the bed. She was quite upset as she searched for her pants. "What a copycat. We already pulled that move. Yeah right, like he's going away without a goodbye."

"Are you gonna write him a going away poem?" Willow asked, which made Xander and Dawn snicker.

"No, but I'll write one about strangling you in your sleep," Kitty shot back, ignoring how her cheeks heated up in embarrassment.

♡︎

Giles was quietly reading a book at the airport terminal, waiting for his plane to arrive. But then his book was suddenly knocked to the ground as something — someone — latched onto his whole body, hugging him tightly. After getting a hand free and righting his crooked glasses, he looked down to see it was Kitty wrapped around him like a child holding their parent's leg.

And the rest of the gang was standing a few feet back, sad smiles on their faces. "You really think we'd let you get away with that?" Willow asked him.

"I was trying to avoid a scene, really," he said while rubbing Kitty's back gently.

Teddy then produced a huge sign that read 'BON VOYAGE, GILES!' surrounded by hearts with balloons attached. "Like we'd make a scene," Teddy said, scoffing playfully.

"Not you. Me," he said quietly. Already, he was feeling emotional, which made it all the more difficult.

Anya stepped forward. "Um, we, uh, brought you some lovely parting gifts." As she held out a McDonald's apple pie, he smiled. "It's American. Get it? Apple pie? It's a packaged snack pie such as you might get at McDonald's. To remind you of all the good food you won't be eating."

"A-and a monster, sort of a Sunnydale souvenir we thought," Tara said, showing off a small, toy monster attached to her finger. "Grr! Argh!"

"Thank you," he said, managing to take the gifts while still holding Kitty. Teddy sat beside them and leaned his head on his shoulder.

"And I wanted to buy you a can of Old English 800, 'cause, you know, England, and you, and... because at the time it sounded really funny. But the guy who lives in the box in front of the store, he, uh, wouldn't buy it for us," Xander rambled on.

"We got your presents at the gas station," Dawn said, coming to sit on the other side of Giles. "We were kind of in a hurry." She held out a handmade card. "Um, we made this in the car. That's why the letters are all shaky."

Giles was incredibly touched by it all and his throat felt tight, like he was ready to cry. But he'd done enough crying the last few months. "This is, uh... impossible, really."

"We just wanted you to know that... we'll miss you. Uh, but we'll be okay," Teddy told him softly. "You do what you need to do and take comfort in the fact that we'll be okay because you raised all of us, not just Kitty and I."

"I know," Giles told him, smiling sadly. "I know you'll be okay."

"I'll take really good care of your money," Anya told him.

It succeeded in making Giles laugh. "Yes, I have no doubt."

Then an announcement sounded over the PA system, gaining Giles' attention. "Flight 3982, leaving for Los Angeles and continuing to London. Rows 20 through 30 are now boarding."

"That's me," Giles said softly, tapping Kitty's side.

"Now?" she asked, her voice cracking. Kitty finally released him so he could take his bag.

"We just made it," Willow said, upset.

"Just," he said, nodding, "yes." They all looked at him. "Well, if we're going to do this, let's do it properly."

Giles set his bag down and moved to Xander. They held out their hands for a handshake, only to end up hugging. As soon as they parted, Anya grabbed him tightly and hugged her. Then he hugged Tara, then Dawn.

"I'm just a phone call away... if you need anything," he said, holding Dawn's face in his hands. "You must promise me."

"I do. I promise," she said quietly.

Giles turned to Willow after that, who smiled nervously, not really believing he was leaving. "Willow. I don't know where to start," he said before hugging her.

"Well, maybe you shouldn't," she said tearfully. "I'm trying to be stiff-upper-lippy."

"Right, right."

Then it was the Cupids' turns. There were no forced stiff-upper-lippy faces to be seen. Both of them were crushed, and their faces caused those few tears to fall from Giles' eyes. He moved forward and hugged them both at the same time, it lasting much longer.

"I am... so proud of you both," Giles said quietly, keeping the moment just between the three of them. "You have no idea how proud. And I never thought I'd love two people as much as I love you both."

"We love you too," Kitty said, getting choked up as the hug ended. "I don't wanna say goodbye to you."

"It's not a goodbye for us. This is a 'see you later,'" Giles informed them. "We'll be together again, as all families are. I just need to step away for a while — regroup my thoughts."

"We know," Teddy said, trying to be as understanding as he could.

Giles smiled at Teddy, looking him over. "She may be... gone, but even still, they'll need a Watcher, as they always have. I can think of none finer than what you've become."

"Well, I learned from the best," he said, looking down. "And I've still got a lot to learn, so make sure to come back soon and finish teaching."

When Giles looked back at Kitty for the final goodbye, there wasn't one. Not with words. She just hugged him again, her tears staining his sweater. It didn't matter that he could come back at any time. It didn't matter that phones existed and they could call each other every day.

Giles was the first person she ever met when she was alone, confused, and scared once being banished. He was her guardian, her friend, her father. He quite literally taught her everything she knew. So, saying goodbye, realizing they wouldn't be living in the same place anymore, wouldn't be seeing each other every day made her feel like dying.

When they parted, Giles grabbed his carry-on bag while Teddy wrapped an arm around Kitty, letting her cry on his shoulder. Giles turned to the others.

"Well, you should get going," Willow said, still trying to be happy. "Don't you have a life or something?"

"Um, well, I suppose that's the question really. Just, uh... be careful," he said. "Please."

There was one last look before he turned toward the gate. As soon as he disappeared, the gang moved to the huge window and watched. No one spoke until the plane finally rolled away, ready to take off.

"There he goes," Willow said, looking at the plane as it got smaller and smaller in the sky.

"It's a good thing. My face was getting sore from all that faux smiling," Xander said, now properly depressed with Giles out of sight.

"It was right, though, wasn't it? Giving him the no-tears sendoff?" Willow asked. "Not counting Kitty and Teddy. I mean, we don't want him goin' off all worried about us."

"He'd still be all worried, just eight hours ahead," Anya said.

"What's he gonna do over there by himself? I mean, he never talks about people from England. What if he's lonely? There are no Kitty's to annoy him," she said, shaking her head.

"He won't be lonely," Tara said. "He used to live there before, remember?"

"And I'm sure we'll talk to him, right?" Dawn asked, already anxious about him being gone. "It's not like he's..."

"We'll call him tomorrow, how 'bout that?" Tara asked. They all knew Dawn was worried about losing Giles from her life completely after losing Buffy. "See how his flight was? Yeah?"

Tara linked her arm with Dawn, and they walked ahead with Kitty and Teddy, finally leaving.

Xander, Willow, and Anya walked a little slower. "Can you believe the timing? I mean, he's leaving right when we're ready to... do the thing tonight," Xander said vaguely in case Dawn or the Cupids were listening.

"I know, I had hoped we'd figure it out before he, uh, before he left," Willow said, sighing.

"Maybe we should have told him," Anya said. "I mean, what if it works?"

"He'll come back," she said, certain of it.

"It'll be dark soon," Xander said, already fidgety about what they'd be doing once the sun went down.

"Yeah, we should get Dawn home with Teddy and Kitty. I want to go over everything one more time," Willow said. "Nothing can go wrong tonight."

Nothing could go wrong because in a few short hours, they were going to bring Buffy back from the dead.

♡︎

It had been another fun night of babysitting. This time, Teddy joined Kitty and Spike. He hadn't questioned it when Willow and Tara lightly suggested it, making it seem like he and Kitty could cheer each other and Dawn up.

But after a game of cards and a round of karaoke, Kitty and Dawn both fell asleep after the emotionally draining day. Spike and Teddy were still up and watching the TV with the volume down low, waiting for Willow and Tara to come home. The witches were out very late, which was unusual.

However, the peaceful scene was interrupted by the sound of a loud motorcycle engine rumbling — several engines, actually. It was followed by the sounds of tires screeching and crashing noises. Both men jumped up and went to the window to see what was happening.

Outside, an entire gang of demons was running around. They were outside all the houses, smashing mailboxes and throwing trash around, wrecking the neighborhood.

Like they knew there wasn't a Slayer around to stop them.

"What's going on?" Dawn asked. The noise woke her and Kitty up, who came to see what was happening as well.

"Stay away from the window," Teddy instructed. He didn't know what these demons wanted. Spike took Dawn's shoulders and moved her back when she didn't listen like Kitty.

"What is it? What's happening?" Dawn asked frantically.

"Spike?" Kitty questioned when he walked from the living room.

"Just do as I say and don't go to the window. All of you," he said, checking to make sure the front door was locked. "I'm going to check the rest of the house. Teddy, watch them and don't move!"

Teddy manned Dawn, holding her arm to make sure she didn't wander off. He kept his eyes glued to the front door, ready to bolt if anything came through. Because of this, his attention was off the ever-curious Kitty.

She moved to look out the window again. She watched as a demon threw a flaming bottle at someone's door. Then a demon rode past on a bike and smashed the Summers' mailbox, making her flinch. Thankfully, none had ventured to the lawn yet.

Finished with checking the house, Spike returned and began rounding up weapons. "A couple of stakes, holy water, one cross — Ow!" he exclaimed, having made the mistake of grabbing said cross. "Brilliant," he muttered, shaking his injured hand.

Then he noticed Kitty by the window and he stomped over angrily. "Here! You want me to bloody spank you? I told you to stay away from the window," he said, pulling her back.

"Well, maybe not right now," she said under her breath, still watching the window. "Who are they?"

"Hellions. Road pirates," he said. Teddy and Dawn were listening as well. "They raid towns, use 'em up, burn 'em down. It's usually backwaters, any place..." Spike trailed off, his eyes falling on Dawn. "Any place they think is vulnerable."

"They know," she said, horrified. "The Slayer's gone."

Spike and Teddy both looked out the window, watching as rocks were thrown through windows and more fires were set.

"We can't stay here," Teddy said, grabbing weapons as well. He handed Kitty the same spiked bat she used when fighting Glory's minions.

"W-well, I'm not going out there!" Dawn exclaimed in fear. Teddy grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the door, where Spike was pushing Kitty.

"Got no choice, bit," Spike said. "We can't protect you here."

Dawn stopped, yanking her hand away from Teddy. "Well, we can lock the doors, turn out the lights."

"And what, hide under the bed linen?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "Not really my style."

"But we need to wait for the others, and Buffy," Dawn said. It earned confused frowns from them, and she realized her mistake. "...bot. You know, the-the Buffybot. We-we have to wait for the others—"

Spike sighed before grabbing Dawn's shoulders. The Cupids let him handle this, seeing as he was familiar with demon attacks like this. "Look! Dawn, I get that you're scared. But I'm your sitter — one of them — so mind me. I'm not gonna let any of those buggers lay so much as a warty digit on you. None of us will. Right?"

Dawn looked at Teddy and Kitty before nodding. "Right."

"Right," Teddy said, taking a deep breath. "Assuming this is happening all over town, we can't wait to see if the others will drop by. We're gonna make it on our own."

"Kitten, stick with me," Spike said, looking down at her carefully. "Niblet, don't you dare leave Ted's side."

After waiting another moment, Spike led them out of the house. They ran along the side of the house, staying low and hiding behind the bushes. Teddy and Spike leaned out to survey the damage. Kitty tried to look too, but Spike pushed her face back behind the cover, not wanting anything to spot her.

"Get back," he whispered.

They saw several demons riding their bikes right onto the porch of a house. Then they broke the windows to get inside, earning screams from the owners. Dawn managed to peek over their shoulders.

"I-it looks like they're just... wrecking stuff," Dawn noted. "No thought other than just destruct-o-rama."

Kitty nodded in agreement and looked at Spike for confirmation. That was when she noticed the small grin on his face. "I cannot believe you," she said, even though she could.

"What?" Dawn asked, seeing the smile.

"Uh, oh, nothing," he muttered sheepishly. "Just, uh... looked like fun. I'm just sayin'." The other three looked at him, unimpressed. He shrugged and looked back at the scene. "Yeah, it's just with this kind of frolicking going on all around town, we're not gonna get very far without..."

Spike trailed off when he spotted something that gave him an idea. He moved away from the wall and snatched two football helmets that were from the neighboring house with two teenage boys. He tossed them to Kitty and Dawn, who caught them, looking confused.

Then Spike grabbed Teddy and dragged him toward the road while explaining the plan. There were two demons on motorcycles driving down the road and now headed straight for them. The demons didn't slow down, and the boys didn't move. Then at the last second before being flattened, Spike and Teddy both lept in the air, managing to kick their respective demons off their bikes. They both grabbed an abandoned bike.

"Let's fly, pigeons!" Spike shouted.

Now understanding, Dawn put her helmet on. Then both girls ran over and got on the bikes — Dawn with Teddy and Kitty with Spike. As soon as they were holding on, they sped off before any demons could stop them.

"I told you to put a helmet on!" Spike shouted over the engine.

"Helmets are for nerds!" Kitty responded, leaning her head on his back as she held on tightly. "Never wear one on my board."

"This is not a bloody skateboard!"

♡︎

All of Sunnydale seemed deserted, as people were hiding and fleeing the sudden demon attack. Businesses on Main Street were in ruins with fires raging all over. The sight turned Kitty's stomach as the four of them continued through town, trying to find any of the others.

"There!" Dawn suddenly said, pointing up ahead. "What's that?"

After nodding to Spike, Teddy turned toward it and Spike followed. It was a large open space that looked as if a demon rager had gone on with speakers and empty and broken bottles of alcohol all over. But now it was deserted.

When the two bikes stopped by all the flaming rubble, all of them dismounted. They were all looking at one thing in particular.

Buffybot.

Her parts were strewn all over, seeming like she was ripped limb from limb. Dawn sadly removed her helmet and tossed it to the side. She moved closer to the torso of Buffybot, looking at her face.

"It's just a machine, Dawn," Teddy told her, shaking his head. This was exactly why he hated Buffybot so much.

"I know," she said, kneeling by what was left of the bot. Spike and Kitty went to check on the other pieces, wondering if Willow could possibly fix the machine.

Dawn reached to close Buffybots eyes, hating the vacant stare. But suddenly, the head turned and looked at her, making Dawn gasp. Teddy took a step closer.

"Dawn. You're my sister Dawn," Buffybot said matter-of-factly. Then she looked around in confusion. "Where did I go?"

"What?" Dawn asked.

"Where did I go? I was here. Here. But then I ran away," she said slowly.

"I-I don't—"

"No. Not me. The other Buffy. Yes. The other Buffy."

Dawn's eyes went wide. "Buffy?"

Teddy sighed and shook his head. "Her programming's jacked. C'mon. It's not safe here."

But Dawn just looked at Buffybot, who kept speaking slowly. "I don't... I don't... know where she ran off to. Maybe—" But then she froze mid-word, what was left of her battery dying out.

Dawn backed away while getting up, still staring at the lifeless bot in shock. Teddy touched her shoulder gently. "Look, I know seeing her like that—"

Teddy was shocked when Dawn forcefully pushed him. It led to him falling because he wasn't expecting it. And in that time, Dawn booked it across town.

"Dawn!" Teddy shouted, too shocked to move for a moment. Then he pulled himself to his feet to run after her.

Kitty and Spike had been farther away and not paying attention as they gathered Buffybot pieces. But when they heard Teddy shout, they dropped all the broken appendages to see Teddy chasing after Dawn, who was surprisingly fast.

"Little bit?" Spike called in disbelief. "Dawn!"

"C'mon," Kitty said, pulling him toward the bikes. As they climbed on them, she looked uncertainly at Spike. "Which handle is stop and which is go?"

"Put the fucking helmet on."

♡︎

Teddy hadn't found Dawn. Kitty and Spike caught up to him fairly quickly on the motorcycles, and he was hopelessly trying to figure out which way the girl went. After Kitty nearly crashed her bike trying to stop, they switched out so that Teddy could drive.

The three of them scoured the entire town of Sunnydale trying to find Dawn, but they came up empty-handed They didn't find any of the others either. Though it did seem like the gang of demons were leaving town, even if it made no sense.

Finally, after an hour of searching, Kitty suggested they try the house. With how much time had passed, she had plenty of time to make it back home on foot. And when they did reach the house — the street was now demon-free — the three nearly knocked the door off its hinges.

"Dawn!" Kitty and Spike both shouted.

"Dawn! Are you there?" Teddy asked, scanning the empty living room quickly.

"I'm here!" Dawn called from upstairs after a moment. Then she came down the stairs, and all of them narrowed their eyes at her for scaring them like that.

"Thank God," Teddy said, sighing.

"You scared us half to death... or more to death," Spike said frustratedly. "You — I could kill you."

"And I'd let him," Teddy said, crossing his arms.

Dawn came down the stairs slowly, an unreadable expression on her face. "Guys," she said carefully.

"I mean it," Spike went on. "I could rip your head off one-handed and drink from your brain stem."

"Yeah, I've seen him do it," Kitty said, backing the threat up even if she hadn't seen him do it.

But then she frowned when Dawn reached the bottom of the stairs. It was clear that something was up, they just didn't know what.

"Look," Dawn whispered. Then she turned back and they saw Buffybot coming down the stairs, all put together and in new clothes.

Teddy rolled his eyes. "Yeah. We've seen the fucking bot before. Kinda wish she didn't patch up so—"

Teddy broke his sentence off, finally taking a good look at the girl on the stairs. They all did, taking in her piercing human gaze and less perky demeanor. She stared right back, never looking away from Teddy, who all of a sudden felt like he couldn't breathe.

"Buffy?"