6|"I Just Can't Win."
After their fight to the death with most of the pancake batter, Allison makes another batch and actually gets the chance to cook them this time. The six kids crowd around the kitchen table and Allison places the platter of dozens of pancakes on the table. Everyone starts reaching and snatching the food, dumping syrup on the pancakes and swiping butter across them. In the midst of the commotion, Lydia notices that Stiles has not grabbed any food. "You eating Sti?" Stiles smiles sadly.
"I'm violently unhungry," he states. Lydia sits back down next to him glumly, their hands still attached by the hand cuffs. Just about a month ago she had told him about her drive to starve herself in order to be thin. He had not taken it well, crying himself to sleep before getting it together. She was better now, happy with herself, but the way Stiles looks is how she looked. It's not like he was doing it to be slim, he was not eating because he was unhappy. Under the table, Lydia grabs Stiles' hand, the hand cuffs clanging as she does so. Upon Lydia grabbing his hand, Stiles closes his eyes, taking a deep breath. It is easy to see that he is holding back a flood of tears. Just as Scott begins to notice Stiles in distress, Lydia diverts his attention.
"I um, forgot to put perfume on, come on Sti," Lydia makes up an excuse. Lydia gently pulls Stiles upstairs, away from their friends. They march in unison, slowly up the stairs. By the time they make it to Lydia's room, tears are beginning to roll down Stiles' cheeks. Lydia hugs him with her free arm, pulling him tightly to her own body. Stiles begins to sob uncontrollably. This in turn just makes Lydia cry. It hurt, seeing Stiles hurt, broke Lydia's heart even.
"Lydia I love you so much, so freaking much," Stiles mutters as her tucks his head into her ginger hair. Lydia clutches tighter onto him.
"I love you too, thank you," Lydia tells Stiles. He pulls away from her enough to see her face. Their tear reddened-eyes meet.
"You're thanking me? What for? If anything, I should be thanking you, you're the reason I haven't flung myself off of a rooftop yet," Stiles states bluntly. Lydia grabs Stiles' face with her free hand.
"Hey, don't say stuff like that, ever please, I need you to much," Lydia pauses and watches fresh tears fall down Stiles' cheeks at that statement. "Anyways, just thank you for everything, being a great friend."
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Lydia watches Allison leave her bedroom and meets Cora at the table for breakfast. "Morning Ali," Cora mutters. Allison smiles in response. "Hey I'm doing laundry today, got anything that needs to be washed?" Cora asks the girls.
"Oh yea thanks I'll go and get it," Lydia states. Allison grumbles a 'me too' and scurries to her room to grab her laundry. Cora collects all the laundry and combines it with Allison's and Lydia's. Cora takes the bag of laundry and leaves the apartment to walk to the basement to do their laundry. It's only eight in the morning so no one else should be down there. Cora hums to herself as she carries the heavy bag down several flights of stairs. Her long hair tickles her back as she flies down the staircase. Finally she reaches the basement and sighs for no apparent reason. She stops short in front her machine when she sees someone standing at the machine next to her. Isaac looks up at her as he throws clothes into the machine. "Oh fuck Cora he-"
"The fuck are you doing here?" Cora cuts him off. Isaac sighs and before he can speak Cora cuts him off yet again. "I thought we made rules about this," Cora snarls. Isaac shoved his hands in his pockets.
"C'mon Cora you don't expect us to actually follow those, we are gonna have to tolerate each other eventually," Isaac states. Cora rolls her eyes and drops her bag of clothes on the ground with a quiet thud.
"Fine, but don't talk to me," Cora spits as she begins to load her machine. The pair successfully ignores each other as they begin their laundry. When the machines are loaded Cora leans her back against the machine, reaching in her back pocket for a cigarette and lighter. Isaac watches her in a trance.
"You know you're really not supposed to smoke those inside," he comments innocently. In turn, Cora lights the cig and takes a drag before blowing the smoke directly into Isaac's face.
"Thought I told you not to talk to me," Cora states before taking another hit. Isaac sighs and shrugs.
"I just can't win, I've apologized relentlessly, I've spent months crying about it, if you don't want to try and trust me again then fine," Isaac states, picking up his laundry basket. He begins to walk away before Cora stops him.
"What would you do if the roles were reversed? If you had known that I'd been naked with another man, if I fucked another man, if another human being made me moan and sigh. If my hands were all over his naked body. What would you do?" Cora asks him angrily.
"It was years ago, I was drunk, I told you immediately, I apologized every time I saw you, I know I'm not worth shit to you but-"
"Not worth shit to me? Are you kidding me? If you weren't worth anything to me why would I still care so much that you cheated? Why would I still spend most of my nights getting drunk or high or crying or fucking other guys to get over you if you mean nothing to me? You mean everything to me, that's why I can't forgive you, because you fucking ruined me," Cora exclaims. Isaac pinches the bridge of his nose. They are both silent for a moment. Cora breathing heavily and Isaac holding back tears with all of his will power.
"I'm sorry, I just- I'm sorry." And he meant it.
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Allison found herself needing some retail therapy. She had effectively tried on all of her clothes and has decided she needs some new pieces. Lydia is still in the living room when Allison struts past her explaining her plan as Lydia listens on the couch. Allison hikes up her jeans, tucks in the front of her sweater into them, and ties back her hair as she pushes through the door. She freezes in her tracks when she finds a handsome man leaving his apartment at the same time. Scott shoves his keys in his pocket and lets out a sigh. "Figures," he says aloud. Allison smiles shyly, thinking about what Stiles told her about how Scott still loved her.
"Hey," she says queitly. Scott sucks in his abdomen and straightens his spine, clearly taking a deep breath.
"Hi, hi Ali, Allison, sorry. I can wait for you to leave if you want, you know, keep my distance." Allison shakes her head gently.
"Thats okay, I don't mind,"she says still grinning. The pair begins to walk down the stairs. At first they are silent, but Allison works up the courage to start a conversation. "So what job did you get over here?" She asks curiously.
Scott scratches the back of his head. "Uh, a gig in music production, you know record companies and such, finding new artists," he explains. Allison nods her head.
"Wow, thats amazing," she tells him. Scott blushes as they complete another flight of stairs. He is very aware that their hands are grazing as they take each step.
"Yeah its pretty great, my mom says she'll miss me, but to be honest I think she is just happy to have the house to herself, though I told her not to touch our- the basement," Scott blabs. Allison smiles, feeling sentimental.
"Thats a blast form the past huh?" Allison remarks. Scott just nods.
"Still working with archery?" Scott questions. Allison nods.
"Can we skip these questions so I can ask you what you wanna ask me and what I wanna ask you and well you know?" Allison ponders as they make it halfway down the buildings stairwell. Scott gulps audibly.
"Uh, erm yeah of course sure, sure, but uh, you start." Allison giggles slightly under her breath.
"Um are you seeing anyone?"
"No, you?"
"No," Allison replies quickly, trying not to smile to wide. "Are you um, planning on staying in the city for a significant amount of time, you know, no plans to run off hours and hours away say nineteen hours away for four years?" Allison questions him, half joking.
Scott chuckles, "no plans of the sort at all," he states, finally not sounding so nervous. Allison finally lets herself smile wide and grab Scotts hand just as the exit the building onto the street.
"Perfect."
__________________________________________________________________
Lydia, wearing sunglasses in the kitchen drops her shot glass on the ground. It shatters into tiny shards all over the floor. She blows out air and shrugs. "That sucks." She kicks the glass under the counter and plainly grabs another shot glass from the cabinet. Lydia empties the bottle of gin into the small glass and throws the liquid back into her throat. Cora giggles as she watches Lydia perform this esteemed action. The young Hale herself is on her back on the counter with a roach between her lips. She puffs away at the herb religiously, letting the smoke block her view of their dirty white ceiling. "Lyds you gotta stop breaking those damn glasses," Cora giggles before puffing some more. Lydia whips her body around to face her friend.
"NO judgment this afternoon Hale, we are unwinding from men drama," Lydia slurs, a handful of gin shots in. Cora snorts.
"What boy drama do you have?" she asks. Lydia sighs, muttering 'never mind' under her breath. Just as Lydia grabs the neck fo her bong and brings it to her mouth, lighting the bud, the door busts open. Lydia starts pulling as she watches through her sunglasses as Scott and Allison enter the apartment. Lydia blows out smoke, her jaw dropping. Cora shoots up to see who walked in and her jaw drops similarly to Lydia's. "Oh shit!"
Scott looks at the girls in shock. He glances at his watch and back at Lydia and Cora. "You know its only three o'clock right?" Scott clarifies. Lydia grins.
"Yeah but its Saturday baby!" Cora yells. Allison breaks out into laughter. She pulls off her jacket and throws it on the coat rack, then walking into the kitchen. She steals Lydias shot glass and a half full bottle of vodka.
"Cheers sister," she exclaims while she pours and shoots her first shot of the night. The other two girls cheer loudly. Lydia begins to dance, her shades still resting on her nose. Her boot clad feet slip on her dropped shot glass and she screams loudly as she falls to the ground. Everyone laughs as she crashes to the floor. Lydia rubs her head when she lands. A giggle escapes her mouth before she states plainly, "ow."
A loud bang follows at the door. "Lydia! Lydia are you ok?" Stiles screams from the hallway, pounding on the door. Scott snorts and opens the door, revealing a very worried Stiles with a wooden bat grasped in his palms. He looks around confused at the scene in front of him. Everyone looks at his with questioning stares. "What?" he shrugs, "I heard a scream.' Allison rolls her eyes and mutters something about a lovestruck boy.
Lydia pulls herself off of the floor, her sunglasses uneven and her hair a mess. When she sees Stiles she giggles and approaches him stumbling. "Nice bat Stilinski," She purrs as she stroked the wood. Stiles sighs as Lydia giggles and moves away from him again.
"I thought something was wrong, but now I see that everything is fine, or I think it is," he jokes. The room breaks into laughter as the group of five analyzes this weirdness of the situation. Cora dangles her legs off the counter.
"Come here Stilinski," she states, extending her arm to offer him her joint, "come relax with your dear friend Cora." Stiles treads his way to Cora and accepts a few puffs of her bud. Lydia watches him in a drunken haze from her spot on the counter where she is sitting. Stiles brings the joint to his lips and inhales. The music playing seems to turn slow and play only inside Lydia's head, as if there is a radio in her brain. Lydia observes how his cheekbones protrude when he inhales. The dots of stubble covering his jaw provide shadows that make her think about caressing his face. His head tilts back as he exhales slowly. The dark tendrils of shaggy hair fall back as he tips his head. His lips purse as the smoke swirls and forms a cloud that circles their heads. He slowly hands the joint back to Cora. Or maybe he isn't actually moving slow, Lydia can't tell. Stiles brings his hand to his hair and runs his long fingers through the array of waves on his head. Lydia finds herself concentrated on every tendon and vein in his hands. A grin tugs at the ends of Stiles' lips. Lydia feels herself wanting him. His eyes meet hers and Lydia can not rip her gaze away from him. His eyes drip like slow, warm, golden honey. She wishes he would never stop looking at her.
"Hello, earth to Lydia," Allison says, obviously repeating herself as she pokes Lydia in the back. Lydia finally turns away from Stiles to see what Allison wants. "You want another shot?" Allison asks with a fresh batch of five shots at the ready. Lydia grins drunkenly as a response and Allison grins. The five of them gather around the island in the center of the kitchen and all grab a shot glass. Stiles stands across the island from Lydia and takes his glass in his hand. Lydia grins at him, he smiles back. They cheers and take the shot. Lydia swallows fast, loving the burn it leaves in her throat. She brings her gaze back to Stiles who is wiping his bottom lip with the side of his thumb. He doesn't know what he does to me, Lydia thinks. Lydia trips backwards slightly, catching herself before she falls. The group laughs at her. Cora grabs Lydia's hand, smiling at her friend. The two girls stand close next to each other, swaying from the amount they have drank. Stiles scoffs.
"Maybe its time for a break for you Lyds," Stiles suggests. Lydia smiles wide at him.
"My night has just begun!" she exclaims. Scott snorts quietly.
"Just another reminder, only three o'clock, technically not night, not even evening," Scott jokes. Allison rubs his back with a smile playing on her lips. Cora raises her eyebrows.
"So are we just not going to talk about this?" Cora questions, pointing her ring clad hand at the pair. They blush in unison.
"Across the hallway isn't exactly nineteen hours apart," Scott says plainly. Cora bites her lip and nods.
"Valid point McCall," She says before smoking more of her nearly dead joint. Lydia, despite being reasonably hammered, cannot help but notice the familiarity of the situation. These people have been in her life so long, yet absent for the past few years. It feels comforting, like being home again.
"I've got a question for you Cora," Stiles says as Scott and Allison move to the couch, bringing a bottle with them. Cora lets go of Lydia's hand to walk to the sink and drop her now dead joint into it.
"What's that buddy?" Cora replies, digging for something in her pocket. Stiles inhales fully.
"I'd love to stay here but the guilt of leaving Isaac alone across the hall is eating me alive. So my question is would you rather me leave and have no me, or let Isaac come and you still get me?" Stiles says all of this very quickly, anxiously awaiting her response. Cora pulls a cigarette out of her pocket and stone faced, places the stick between her lips. Cora's hair is scraped into knot on her head. Her cold eyes are slathered in dark black with a sparkle of silver stuck through her nose making her seem all the more unforgiving. She lights the cigarette and inhales before shoving her lighter back into her loose jeans pocket. She exhales, keeping the stick between her lips. With grace she removes her many layers of flannels and denim jacket and drops them on the floor revealing a rather small black top and an abundance of silver chains around her neck, some reaching down into her braless cleavage. She looks up at Stiles with empty eyes.
"Bring in the cheater," Cora says, the words muffled by the cancer stick. Stiles sucks on his lip and leaves the apartment to retrieve Isaac. Lydia rubs Cora's back supportively. Cora puffs relentlessly as she picks at her fingernails. "Come to the bathroom with me quick Lyds?" Cora asks. Lydia nods through her drunken haze and follows Cora to the bathroom. Lydia watches, her vision lagging like a video game with bad connection as Cora snorts up half of a crushed Xanax . Lydia personally doesn't enjoy pills, but she trusts Cora to act responsibly. Lydia smiles sadly at Cora as the young Hale girl looks back up at her.
"It'll be okay Cora," Lydia slurs, as sober as she can muster.
"I'm not worried," Cora replies. The pair leaves the bathroom just as Isaac and Stiles enter the apartment. Isaac looks uncomfortable, his hands stuck into his pockets. Cora doesn't even take a second to look at him, she just grabs the bong and start ripping away, switching it out every few seconds for her cigarette. Lydia quickly grabs a drink for Isaac from the fridge and sends him over to Scott and Allison who are still on the couch. Thats the last semi-sober memory Lydia has of the night.
It is dark out now, it must be at least seven at night. The group of six is effectively demolished. Stumbling and dancing or taking shots or ripping bong. Lydia, her head in a fog, decides she needs something from her bedroom. She jumps off the counter and sways noticeably. Stiles who was just drunk chatting with her and Cora grabs her waist to steady her. Lydia regains her balance, mostly, and looks up at Stiles, the sunglasses still over her eyes. "I just need something," Lydia bobs her head, "from my room," she slurs. Stiles nods and grabs her hand.
"Maybe I should come with you, you looking pretty knocked," Stiles suggests. Cora smirks as Lydia nods and leads Stiles to her room. He tries desperately not to but he can't help but look at Lydia's hips as she walks in front of him. He exhales quietly to himself.
Lydia does not turn the light on so neither does Stiles. Lydia begins to search in the dark for something, she can't even remember what. "Will you close the door Sti, I can't focus with that music." Stiles mutters a 'sure' and then lets the doors click shut, leaving them in an almost total darkness. The only light comes from the city light outside Lydia's window. Red and blue hues cast dim shadows around the room. Lydia stands up straight after looking for something under the bed. She stumbles backwards a bit until she can feel Stiles standing right behind her. Her breath gets caught in her throat.
Despite the closed door, the music still drums in Lydia's head, only muffled, not silent. Both of them are way past any point of sensible thinking. Without saying a word, Stiles inches closer to Lydia's back until his chest is pressed against her shoulder blades. Her boots add a few inches to her height, and Stiles notices. Its hard not to when the added height places her hips right at his. Lydia lets her head fall back into his chest, heavy with liquor and thought of Stiles's body. Lydia starts moving her hips to the muffled remnants of the music that still plays in the living room. Stiles hand reaches to touch her hip bones. Lydia sways with more intent and Stiles presses his hips harder against her body. Lydia feels him on her, her skin growing hotter by the second. Lydia can feel her knees begging to give out, but she continues to move her body against his. Stiles's breath hits her ear and makes her shiver. Her arm reaches up and back and wraps around Stiles shoulder and neck, helping her to stand. Stiles slides his hand down to her thigh, making Lydia bite her lip. They are moving slow, almost painfully so. Lydia remembers the night they slept together. This feels different. This feels like even more. Stiles brings his lips to her ear and nibbles slightly. Lydia closes her eyes and tries not to sigh to loud.
"Stiles, we're, we are very drunk," Lydia says quietly, dizzy with wanting him. Stiles grabs between her legs and brings his other hand to her chest, pawing delicately. His lips graze her ear.
"Very true," he responds. Lydia lets his fingers roam her body. She lets her head hang heavy again, falling back into her thoughts of being naked with Stiles. She becomes very aware of the bulge in Stiles's pants rubbing against her bottom. He moves his hips forward and presses it harder against her. She exhales loudly and grabs his hair as he looms over her. He feels so familiar, like home, he was her rock for so long. They have always taken care of each other. Like the night before when they had gone out to the diner and Sties had dry heaved until all the food he ate came back up his throat. She had let him cry and brought him back to his apartment and saw him to bed. He is important to her, in more ways than even she knows.
Stiles dips his hand into her pants and Lydia fights every voice in her head saying yes to pull away and turn to face Stiles. His face has dark shadows cast all over it, making him look even more irresistible than normal. "Stiles, I, I want to, you have no idea, but now isn't the right time," Lydia states, suddenly more sober than before. Stiles bites his lip.
"Yeah, yeah you're probably right, we're really drunk," he responds, rubbing the back of his head where her hand was only seconds ago.
"I really really want to, don't get me wrong, but-"
"I understand Lyds, you're right, lets get back out there." Lydia smiles solemnly and approaches him again. She removes her sunglasses for the first time that night and places them on Stiles's face. "What are these for?"
"I can't look at you in the eyes anymore, I'm afraid I'll fall into them and never get out," Lydia says, feeling odd. Stiles nods slowly, shoving his hands back in his pockets. The pair re enters the living space and the rest of the group to find everyone right where they left them. They weave themselves back into the madness with ease, both feeling a little disappointed.
Their night ended shortly after that with everyone falling asleep in varying locations. Cora is left awake in the kitchen at the small table, nursing a glass of water. She sighs loudly, looking about the room. Scott and Allison are the only ones who made it to a bedroom. Stiles and Lydia are on the couch sleeping. Lydia is on her back with Stiles's head in her lap, his arms wrapped around her waist and body residing between her legs. Isaac seems to be asleep upright in the chair.
Cora tries desperately to not look at him, but she fails miserably. She can not seem to pull her gaze away from his smooth curls and cut jaw. The rising and falling of his chest brings a sort of sickening peace to her gut. She lights yet another cigarette and places it between her lips. The smoke travels around the room, eventually growing so strong Isaac's eyes flutter open. He gazes around slowly, barely moving, still intoxicated and sees the source of the smoke. Cora sees him wake up and look at her. "Bad luck huh Lahey?" Cora smirks, heavily under the influence of many substances. Isaac sighs and stands shakily form his chair.
"I'll go home," Isaac states, walking slowly towards the door. Cora takes a deep breath in.
"Ah come on," Cora slurs slowly, which stops Isaac in his tracks. "I'm drunk, or high, or both and more," Cora smiles mischievously. "You irritate me significantly less when I am- what's the word?"
"Impaired?" Isaac suggests. Cora nods and puffs the cigarette.
"Thats the one Lahey, c'mere, help me finish this stig," Cora demands quietly. Isaac contemplates this in his head. Cora Hale, needing help with a cigarette? Not a chance. Cora Hale wanting to talk to me, also not a chance. Drunk Cora Hale asking for me, a slight possibility. Isaac treads towards her and grabs the seat to her right, joining her at the table and accepting her started cigarette. She watches him intently. "How have you been baby? Any chicks?" She asks, not knowing why really. Isaac hands her the cigarette after taking a few drags. He puts his right hand up in the air and wiggles his fingers jokingly.
"Only one," he jokes, though he isn't lying. Cora snorts and begins laughing.
"Wow, totally celibate for four-ish years? Very impressive?," Cora states.
"Yeah just me and old righty," Isaac jokes again. The pair laughs together for the first time in an eternity. Their gaze meets as Cora puffs the cancer stick. Isaac bites his tongue as he stares into her eyes. Cora puts her hand up in the air a bit and shakes her head slowly.
"Oh no, new rule Isaac baby, no looking at me directly in the eye," Cora states. Isaac bites his lip, nodding his head. he holds out his hand to her.
"Agreed," he states and Cora shakes his hand, the two finally agreeing on something is like a breath of fresh air.
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