MY FIRST CHARITY gala is going about as well as I assumed it would.

Well, maybe not entirely, considering I've had the woman of my dreams by my side the entire night.

As for everything else, the dinner menu was designed for socialites and the women of Los Angeles. Vegan and gluten-free options, all plated and consuming a whopping three bites. It was an effort not to laugh as Emery did her best not to make a face when she tried the steak that wasn't actually a steak.

Despite the revolting food, Emery seems to be having the time of her life, so that's really all that matters. I'll endure the useless conversations with friends of my father's, whom I've only met once or twice before if it means it'll keep that smile on her face.

"This place is beautiful," Emery says, bouncing her eyes around the ballroom in awe.

Truthfully, I haven't paid attention to the precision to detail the staff made to transform this night into a Hollywood dream. This damn dress of Emery's has distracted me entirely. With every conversation I got wrapped into with a stranger, it was an effort to keep my gaze on their eyes rather than Emery's breasts, which were spilling out of the top half of her dress since we sat down for dinner.

I should be counting down the seconds until we can leave, but despite how much I wanted to hate spending the night with my father and his uppity friends, I've rarely seen him, and this is the first time I've been anywhere with Emery alone outside the house. I know it's not technically a date, but it sure as hell feels like it. This might be the only night I'll get to experience this with her, so I'm clinging to every second.

"Having a good time?" I ask.

She nods enthusiastically, pushing the vegan steak around her plate. I make a note to grab a pizza on the way home. "Are you kidding? The fashion show was amazing, and Izzy raised over fifty thousand dollars for your father's charity at the auction. Tonight has been an absolute dream, Everett."

Before I can reply, a hand falls on my shoulder, and my body stiffens from the familiarity of it—my father. "Everett," he says. "It's good to see you."

I glance over my shoulder just as Emery sends him a warm smile. It's been rare for my dates to meet either of my parents, but if the situation occurred, they would grovel at my father's feet, and I wouldn't put it past them to try and sleep with him, too, but Emery... She doesn't seem enamored or starstruck. Maybe that's because she grew up with me and has met my parents in passing before, but it's almost a relief she's not making a big deal of it.

"It's been a while," he says to Emery.

She scrunches her nose up. "I'm surprised you remembered. It's good to see you, Mr. Holden."

Little does she know she was the main topic of conversation around our dinner table more often than not when Izzy tried to get a rise out of me growing up.

"Please, call me Cameron."

"Or Cam," my mom chimes in. "Everyone calls him Cam."

My father rolls his eyes. "Not to be rude, Emery, but only my wife calls me Cam. It's kind of our thing."

Shifting uncomfortably in my seat, Emery scans my face, confused, before she turns her attention back to my parents. "Cameron, it is, then. I love your dress, Mrs. Holden. That's from Izzy's newest collection, right?"

She hums appreciatively. "You can call me Maddie, and of course! I am her mother, after all. I had to get my hands on a piece before it got released to the public. Isn't it just gorgeous? We're so proud of our little girl."

The same words have left my parent's lips regarding me before, but it's never felt welcomed. Izzy deserves all the praise she's gotten, but me? I've done nothing in my career yet and treated them like shit for the past seven years. They could scream at me that they're proud until they're blue in the face, but I won't believe it.

"She's incredible," Emery agrees.

Mom waves her hand, changing the subject. "Enough about us. Tell us about you! I want to know everything."

"Mom," I warn.

She fakes innocence. "What? I can't get to know my son's date?"

My temper is boiling at this point, and it's not because my parents are making an effort to get to know her. I'd love for them to be properly introduced in a dream world, but we're not together and never will be. She's not meeting them as my girlfriend, and if she can't meet them as my girlfriend, then...

Emery squeezes my knee underneath the table, giving me an out. "You look flushed," she says. "Why don't you go outside and get some fresh air while I talk to your parents?"

"Are you sure?"

She nods, ushering me to leave. "We'll be just fine. Go. It's okay."

"Perfect." Mom claps her hands and slides into an empty chair beside her. "Give me all the details on this dress."

Fuck.

The minute Emery shares the truth behind the dress and how much effort I put in to make this dream of hers a reality, my mom is going to know how much she means to me. Not that she probably didn't figure it out a long time ago, but knowing it's all laid out in the open... My feelings on full display...

Releasing a sharp breath, I send her a silent thank you and push through the crowd to escape into a back alley of the venue. I rest my forehead against the brick, appreciating the coolness it brings me, and I inhale and exhale to try and get my thoughts in order.

Emery and my father are in the same room, and hiding my disdain from him in front of her is hard. She'd think my problems are ridiculous. Why should I hold a grudge against him when he's been trying ridiculously hard to make up for the lost time with me? I know it doesn't make sense, especially when he's being so nice to her tonight, but the small child I cling to in the back of my mind is scared to give him a second chance.

I'm not sure how long I stand against the brick wall, but the back door opens again, and Emery pokes her head out with a sad smile. "You okay?"

I shrug, continuing to inhale and exhale and calming my heart rate. "How was chatting with my parents? I hope they didn't pry too much."

She laughs. "It wasn't bad. They did invite me over to their house for your birthday dinner in a couple of weeks, though."

Typical.

With a roll of my eyes, she continues to stare at me before saying, "It's normal to be overwhelmed. This is your first real function, and the cameras were blinding, not to mention all the conversations you had to make. I can't imagine..." She clears her throat. "I can't imagine how that must have been growing up, and now that I do..."

Turning to face her, I try to keep my face neutral, but the faintest realization that she might understand my resentment has me scrambling in quicksand. "Now that you do what?" I probe.

She leans against the wall next to me, both of our backs pressed against the brick. "I guess I'll never understand how you feel because I've never been in your shoes, but I sympathize with you, and I'm sorry for ever giving you shit in high school about not drinking or coming out to parties all the time. That part I understand now. This life seems so glamorous on the outside, but actually living it for a night has been..."

I arch a brow, willing her to continue.

"Exhausting," she finishes. "Utterly exhausting."

Fuck.

There goes the fucking wall.

"It is," I agree. "And yeah, growing up was rough. My dad was hardly around, and when I was little, I didn't always understand that he'd come back after being gone for months at a time. I was scared and alone, and I..." Blinking away the burning in my eyes, I force myself to stare straight ahead rather than let her see it. "I just wanted my dad, and even though he's been trying to mend things since high school to make up for that lost time, I can't get rid of the grudge I've held against him. I think I'm terrified he'll decide to return to the league and leave again."

"It's been seven years since he's retired," she says softly.

"I know, but I'm still holding onto that fear for whatever reason. No matter what I do, it won't leave, and I've pushed everyone away because of it because I'm scared they'll—"

"Leave you too?"

Finally, I turn my gaze to hers, and when she's blinking away tears of her own, that's when it clicks.

We may come from different walks of life, but we do have one thing in common.

"People always leave," I whisper.

I'm breathless when she entwines her fingers with mine. "I'm still fighting that battle myself, but what kind of life are we going to live if we push away everyone that makes us happy?"

I shrug. "A shitty one."

"We should probably face our demons soon and figure it out, then."

For the first time all night, I laugh. "You make it sound so easy."

"Well, I'd like to think that if we try hard enough, we'll eventually get there. You know, to the other side."

"Let me guess. The brighter side?"

She sends me a cheesy grin. "Precisely! Now you're getting it. If you don't have a bright side to look forward to, there's no hope, and if there's no hope?" She shudders a breath, a cold puff of air escaping her lips. "Then we're doomed, and I don't want to be doomed, Ev."

Turning from the wall, I stand before her and place my hands above her head against the brick to box her in. Almost instantly, the rising of her chest begins to quicken, and when she tentatively peeks up at me from beneath her eyelashes, I tuck a curl behind her ear and say, "I think I'm looking at the bright side now, and do you want to know why?"

She nods, unable to speak, as I release one hand from the wall to grip her chin with my pointer finger and thumb. "Because ever since you walked through my front door, Emery, it's the first time I've been able to see one."

Author's Note:

I'M FANGIRLING SO HARD RN

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