On my way home I get yelled at a lot. But do I care? No. With that ridiculous smile drawn on my face, I look like a creepy character from the Brave New World who has obviously had too much of soma.

I am judged on every step on my way home. If I take a second longer to drive forward when the red light on the traffic light fades away and a green one appears, I become a punching bag. That's not even the funniest or the saddest part, depends on how you take it. Some actually overtake me and normally I would step on that gas just to fuck with them.

But now I don't want to get myself killed before my nephew's birthday.

One of the drivers yells "Who gave you a license!" and speeds on so quickly he almost gets his car knocked over on the next turn.

Wow, it must so suck to be you. Shit.

It's obvious I love my job and since I was promoted I have learnt to hate it as well. But hey, love can't exist without hate, right? Isn't that what they say? This is another love-hate situation. My shift ends in the afternoon which kinda sucks because I'm not the only one heading home and it happens plenty of time I am stuck in a traffic jam. At least female pedestrians head home too and in Boston's summer sun, I see plenty of bare legs in skirts and shorts. A mighty view. A very mighty one indeed.

Isn't it interesting nobody honks at me when a pretty lady walks by?

It's a relief, nonetheless, when I pull my car in a garage and all the noise, smell and annoyance are gone. Not that the garage in itself isn't smelly... There's still no better than feeling than walking in your home and meet the familiar scent of your own blankets and air freshener.

I enter the apartment that doesn't even remind me of my own anymore. So much has changed this year me from six months from the past would rip my balls in half.

I leave my jacket on a stand-alone clothing hangar and nearly step on a wiggling loaf of bread that moves in the corner of my eyes. Of course, it's not actually a bread, otherwise, I'd be hella worried about the products the supermarkets are offering these days.

Annabelle quickly runs from the living room, grinning wildly and singing playfully "Where did you come from! Where did you go!"

I look down at that, as I called it, a wiggling loaf of bread and at the same moment, the loaf of bread looks up at me. Devon looks like he's figuring out his next move, so I take it he's escaping from the redheaded babysitter. With what he does next, that's a very probable theory. At least someone can make him run for the hills! Devon crawls behind that tiny space that's between my legs and the closed front door and starts drooling, as per usual.

At that sight, Annabelle smiles. She stops slightly crouching and straightens up "Oh, hey, Nathan." She tilts her head to the side a bit to see Devon more clearly and smiles "Is Daddy home? It's Daddy!"

"I see you're having fun. By that I mean you are, not him." I turn my head and keep my body still when I check the kid is nowhere close to throwing up all over my legs back there.

Annabelle pulls down the shirt that has started to climb up her belly and slowly revealing it "He's full of energy today. Usually, he just crawls to the toy he'd like to play with next but today he's feeling adventurous!" Her face expression changes from a smile to... well, a different kind of smile "And what's with you? It looks like you're in a good mood."

"Oh, I'm not allowed to feel happy?" I lift both of my brows and try to take my shoes off but Devon makes this task near impossible.

She laughs when I warn her how what she has said sounded and corrects herself "No! I just haven't seen you this happy with yourself for a while. What happened?"

The smile is an automatic response to her trigger. I recall Daniel inviting me over and Aidan's excitement over the phone. "Yeah," I reply and at the movement of my lips, my whole face is pulled into a large grin "it was a really great day."

All of a sudden Annabelle makes a gesture of slapping her forehead and exclaims "Oh my God, your project was due today! They loved it, didn't they?"

"Uh, yeah, it went really good." I have completely forgotten about that and thanks to her I now have another reason to be happy about today's day and enjoy myself. And let's not forget about our hot little Miss Jimenez.

Annabelle squints her eyes at me and like a bossy lady crosses her arms. I like it the way she squeezes her tits together. "But that's not it, is it? Something else put you in such a good mood."

I answer her with a triumphant smile when I manage to get the shoes off my feet and want to list this as a reason for my happiness.

I pick up Devon from the floor and hold him close to my chest as I carry him around the apartment wherever I go, with Annabelle following me like a shadow. "I talked to my brother today."

I expect her to be fazed by it but unlike me, she stays in contact with people and perhaps they are not so fond of leaving her either.

I correct myself "My brother with the crazy fiancee." I keep out the details of dating that crazy fiancee myself. I don't need any disapproving looks today and if I mention I used to be in a relationship with my brother's girlfriend, lots of brows get raised my way.

Annabelle doesn't get it at the very moment but she's a smart bean and her eyes sparkle in realisation "The one who doesn't want you to see your nephew?"

"Yep, Aidan's his son." I put Devon when I sit down on the couch and he immediately starts crawling away. As long as he stares at the coffee table or tries to get under it, I'm not worried about him. Aidan's tried that numerous times and always failed, this kid's safe.

"But what's such a big deal if you talked to him? Did he make her realise what she's doing is unexplainable?" When Annabelle puts it that way, it's hard for me to tell her Patty's anger is completely justified. Overreacted but justified.

To explain to her all the history, or at least the parts of it that she needs to know to understand that, would be the normal thing to do. But as I've said before, if Annabelle gives me a sideways look if I check out a girl's ass that walks by, you get the idea why am I avoiding it. It's not like describing Patty's sexual history between the two brothers is what I like to do and can't wait to do it either.

"We weren't on good terms for a while. I thought we were but well, I was proved wrong. She decided I shouldn't see Aidan again and then took it even further by forbidding Daniel to contact me." From the quick summary, Patty sounds like a Gestapo. I forget to mention she's actually a lot worse.

I observe Annabelle's reaction and she is anything but on her side. She is grossed out, surprised and very judgemental. She has that type of voice that caresses your back when you hear it but it's quite a surprise when a stern tone feels as if a guy gets his chest waxed - not nice "And for some reason, she thinks she can play with your lives? She can't forbid anyone from being siblings. I can't imagine if my boyfriend told me I should stop calling and seeing Caitlin!"

I can imagine that quite vividly, actually. 

"That's what my life has been for this past six months." I am amazed by myself how I make it sound like I'm used to all the suffering of the world which I'm not. My life crumbled to pieces when a thing went sideways. 

Annabelle sits down next to me, puts her legs up and crosses them. She looks like a pouting little scout girl if you take away the blouse whose buttons can't decide whether to rest or hang on to their lives.

Then she turns to me, as confused as before, with a touch of anger, "So, that was the highlight of the day? That you spoke to your brother?"

"Yes and no," I sigh and lean forward as I start to tell her the more or less whole story "Daniel and I are pretty close. Always have been, more than with our sister. When Patty came along with her policies on how to keep us away from each other, she also said I'd never be invited anywhere. I can survive that, honestly. I can survive being left out of a dinner but with that, she also meant I wouldn't be invited to Aidan's birthday and she wouldn't let go of it. But when Aidan said he misses me, she had a change of heart and told Danny I'm welcome to come to his birthday party."

Annabelle's eyes widen when she speaks with sarcasm so thick you could cut it with a knife "Oh, what a good person." Moments later her face softens, her body relaxes and looks up to me "Are you excited about it?"

"Are you kidding me? I bought him a gift a few months early. It's like it's my birthday." I really hope he'll like the teddy bear that tells you up to eight stories you can choose by pressing the paw beans. He's the type of a kid that always asks for stories but if you gave him a book, he wouldn't even touch it. Maybe it's the thing that he's only gonna be five years old. 

She smiles brightly when I tell her I've got nearly everything planned out before Patty ruined me and it's a relief to finally talk about kids with a woman that won't understand it as 'Oh, he's a keeper!' "What did you get him?"

I describe her the gift in great detail, from the softness of the paw beans to the colour of his fur and the depth of the storyteller's voice. For the end I smile proudly because it's how I feel about it. Given how well I know Aidan and how much he's like Daniel in such situations, he'll be excited about the gift. 

Annabelle is softly smiling the entire time as she watches me describing the surprise for my nephew. Frequently, she presses her lips together to wet them and perhaps to stifen a larger smile. From time to time she even turns away but her eyes stop following me for only a brief time before they eventually wander back to me. 

I'm done talking about it when she shifts in her seat and stretches her legs without getting up "From the way you talk about that teddy bear, I'm gonna get you one for your birthday."

"I'd probably love it," I chuckle in a joke though there's a bit of a truth in there. Maybe once as a kid, I'd go nuts about a gift like that. 

"When's your birthday? If everyone else is so excited about this teddy bear as you are, I better make a reservation immediately!" 

"You still have lots of time till 16th November," I murmur more automatically than with full consciousness. Devon's by my legs, tugging on the trousers and before he manages to put the jeans fabric in his mouth, I tear him away and put up on the couch where I hope he'll find a toy and keep himself busy. When he doesn't, I get one the purple chewable toy, put it in his hands and his curious mind takes over sooner than later. 

Annabelle absent-mindedly nods since she's following Devon's movement as well. Just like before, all of a sudden, a new question pops into her mind that changes either her mood or the whole nature of the conversation we're having "And did Miss Bitch give any instructions about Devon too? She sounds like the type."

My ribs suddenly form a cage around my heart and start choking it, just like my stomach twists itself as if to commit suicide. My livers and kidneys both quit their jobs too. 

You think I forgot about my kid? No. 

... Of course, I forgot about my kid!

It's one hell of a feeling of guilt when I am grounded to Earth with the fact I'm celebrating the day I'll see my nephew without giving my adoptive son a thought. It's a mixture of guilt, anger and embarrassment that I feel towards myself. Hell, I despise my carelessness and then I wonder why people are so surprised to hear I even thought of taking care of a kid. 

"I-uh..." My mind usually works quickly with responses even if they're not completely truthful or not specifically nice. The perks of growing up with two younger siblings, a whorish mother and then coming up with excuses if women took a one-night stand wrong. But currently it feels like my brain is going to implode. I'm trying so hard to think of something I think my brain is shrinking until the point that won't be impossible anymore and just combust. 

And things were going so well with Annabelle and me. We finally got used to each other and got to know... It all happens in just a few seconds but somehow I have the time to think of all those things. 

Thank God, she's oblivious or she pretends I have it all figured out "You haven't thought about that yet, have you?"

It's a large rock of relief that rolls off my chest at her words and I bet that shows in my posture as well "No-no, I haven't. I've just been invited a while ago."

"Will you call her and ask her about it?" She asks with such a haste, she might as well drive a phone down my throat. 

I scoff "I'm not gonna call her no matter what will be my decision."

Annabelle's voice drops, her tone sounds melancholic. She looks like a nice girl next-door, her only problem must've been growing up with a cold sister like Caitlin. The closest she's been to family-drama like mine was probably on a TV. And she doesn't eve know the whole thing! "She really wrecked you, huh?"

"Meh, I guess. It was definitely a reaction I didn't see coming." 

With a sound as soft as a breeze, she whispers "Is that why you adopted Devon?"

The way Annabelle sometimes sees right through me tends to be terrifying and comforting at the same time. It's nice to have someone around that sees if something is wrong and knows or tries to relate to you, but it can be a little disturbing knowing to them you're like an open book. 

"It just worked as a trigger, I think." When I speak, confess this to her, I find it impossible to make an eye contact. Maybe I'm a little embarrassed about it but I think this time is also the first time I confessed this to myself. "Look," I sigh, giving this all or nothing. I don't think I have anything to lose with Annabelle. "Patty and I used to date and it ended badly. She then fell for Danny who's been head over heels in love with her and when they go a kid, I asked her if Aidan's maybe... You know, mine. Then, I was forbidden from speaking to my brother again."

At the second piece of information that I give her, her eyes widen so they're like big full moons. I thought it impossible to grow larger but as my brief story continue, I'm proven wrong over and over again. 

When I'm done telling the story, she lifts up her hand "Hold on a second, she was your girlfriend?"

"Yeah."

She leans forward "And then you asked her about being her kid's father?"

"Yeah."

Suddenly, she starts laughing and she covers her face with her palms "Oh my God!" She quickly coughs when her laughter slowly dies down and stops hiding her face "Okay, ahem, I get it you were worried but if you're dealing with an ex like her, take it easy and gently, hm?"

"Trust me, lesson learnt." I roll my eyes like I haven't heard that before or discovered the best technique. And come on, I did come easy on Patty when my imagination took the best of me. 

We continue to sit there in silence. Well, for me the wiggling of a baby and his mucking sounds count as silence. Annabelle would sometimes giggle quickly and quietly and then try to make it seem like she did no such thing.

"I can't imagine how she reacted to Devon the first time," After she starts giggling again, louder his time, I notice this little ginger truly is soulless. All the stiffened smiles and chuckles were actually about Patty and not my stupidity with her. 

The idea pops into my head that makes me lean forward and whisper "Actually," I get up during the making of my hideously amazing plan and turn to her once I'm standing seven feet away from her "she never met him. I didn't even tell her about him, Danny was the one, and from what I've gathered, she wasn't really ecstatic about it."

Normal reaction from normal women would be furrowed brows, disturbed and terrified voice with eyes looking for an escape. But Annabelle is no normal woman, she's a ginger. She's not trying to calm me down and tell me I don't want to do this or that, actually she couldn't be more relaxed. 

A perfect accomplice!

"If I imagine what she's like correctly, then my guess would be she cut someone's throat." Annabelle crosses her arms and her legs but in that feminine way. All she needs is a skirt and Sharon Stone's trick from Primal Instinct. 

I point a finger at her "A very good guess, Miss!" What's her surname again?

She shakes with her head "I still don't know exactly where this is going but I have a tingling feeling it's something evil."

I can't help but smirk evilly and confirm her suspicions "I know I shoul take your advice, treat Patty as if she were a ticking bomb, which she is, but nothing would piss her off more than me stealing all the show. She's pregnant again and she demands attention. If I were, theoretically-"

"Yes, theoretically!" Annabelle exclaims and I really feel like a villain with a most hot, hot, hot accomplice. 

"-to show up with an enormous gift for Aidan, a gift every kid on the block wants because it's cool, modern and new, that would make her envious. And if I were to show up, theoretically, with my new adoptive son-"

"She definitely wouldn't be happy."

"Oh, definitely not! But if people will be all around us at Aidan's  birthday party, she will hold herself back. She'll have to keep that ticking bomb's explosion to herself." I pick up Devon who doesn't mind that I'm lifting him in the air while he's playing with his chewable toy and announce "So, why not do both and really... really piss her off!"

Annabelle smiles widely and shows me all of her white teeth "You're one bad man, Nathan Price."

"Talk dirty to me," I wink her way and see that blush crawl all over her face.

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