I quickly say goodbye to the couple and hug Aidan one more time before I leave them all to their happy and fucking perfect family life. On my way to the car, I think about how many times Patty ruined the whole evening, by mentioning some high school crush we used to have on each other and how that could grow into something more if I changed if I were better.

It's funny how the mistake is always in me. Perhaps she hasn't realised that she isn't fucking perfect as well. Why is she even crying about something that happened 10 years ago? There's Danny's baby in her, waiting to be born, she has a son with him and she's whining about me?

I doubt she actually wants to be with me. She probably just wants to make me jealous. She has always tried to do that, even when we were 'dating'. Or maybe her ego just grew way too big and now thinks she's an amazing catch. I snort at the thought and climb in my polished Alfa Romeo.

I start the engine and think where should I go. Stop at Dad's and try to celebrate with him like I tried to do it with Daniel and Patty? Say hi to Mum and tell her I proved her wrong and actually made something out of me? Or just go... home? At the last part, I feel my heart squeeze painfully as if someone grabbed it and squeezed it as hard as they could. For a moment I think Patty was maybe right, that I'm lonely and need someone.

And you know what? She's absolutely right! I'll celebrate like I should've.

***

It's not hard for me to decide to which club I would like to go and also where I'll get the best entertainment for a night. I have to choose between Rocky's, LuxEm and Andron.

Rocky's a dump and I prefer not to find myself a woman from there. I have high standards for women and no desire for worthless, pitiful and horny hookers. Besides, I like my health. It's something I cherish and I don't want to catch an infection.

LuxEm is a great club, it's where I met sweet Eliza, but would I risk going there and meet her on the dancefloor or again by the bar?

Andron is meh... Okay, I suppose. I haven't visited it more than 3 times and as far as I remember, I always deeply regretted it. I forgot why, but the bitter taste in my mouth is still there when the name of the club is mentioned.

While I drive, I am stopped by quite a few red traffic lights, but I try not to stress about it. Instead, I turn on the radio and wait for a good song to turn up, browsing through and switching frequencies. I finally find The Boss' song I'm on Fire and I can't help but to turn the volume to the max and sing loudly along with it.

"Hey little girl is your daddy home, did he go and leave you all alone. Mhm, I got a bad desire. Oh-oh-oh, I'm on fire."

"Tell me now, baby, is he good to you? Can he do to you the things that I do, oh no. I can take you higher. Oh-oh-oh, I'm on fire."

Ah, it always feels good to hear one of Bruce's juicy songs. Once it's over I almost feel depressed, 'cause it's replaced by today's music which possesses no quality what so ever. I turn off the radio, but after a few moments, a kind of anxiety fills the air in the car. What's this? Silence begins to choke me and I try to send it away by opening a window, let in fresh air and the sound of the wind. None of it helps. In fact, it only makes it worse.

I sigh loudly, like that would actually help and turn the radio back on. The song from Titanic starts playing, that cheesy and disgusting movie, but I don't switch the frequency. I listen to it and even start to hum the famous melody.

Streets are empty and even though I could easily dash to the club, I drive slowly. The reason isn't the patrolling police vehicles, the reason is something else and I can't really say what it is. I like the way the moment is built and apparently I feel the need to savour it.

Only a few more turns, and a stop traffic sign before I drive my car in the parking lot of the club LuxEm. Yeah, I decided to go there again. Killing the engine I pack my keys and make sure my wallet is safe. You never know what kind of dudes you're gonna meet in the club. Or what an expensive taste the lady is going to have.

No matter the crowd waiting in front of the club, I walk to the security guard and he lets me in more than gladly. Having friends in the right places.

Colourful lights blind me and when I close my eyes I see these red and green dots everywhere. But soon my eyes get used to the circumstances and I am all cool to proceed.

I scan the place like some kind of a terminator looking for his Sarah Connor. I am so intensely searching the crowd, I barely notice I'm here alone, while everyone else brought someone with them.

A giant lump appears in my throat and when some robust guy bumps into me, I have no voice to yell at him to watch out. He just drunkenly stumbles, blames it all on me and I obediently move out of his way, still feeling a bit lost. I feel the need to sit down, swallow few whiskeys or vodkas or tequilas for that matter, I don't really care, but I can't even bring myself to look around the club for a bar.

"Hey, are you okay?" A gentle voice penetrates its way through the music and right to me. When I turn to look at her and bring myself to think again, I see a young and short, but extremely cute brunette in a green dress who seems worried about me.

I stutter like a 15-year old breaking a sweat "Y-yes." I look down and regain my manliness by mentally punching myself in the face real hard "Yeah, I'm all good."

She smiles widely, nods and presses her lips together in relief "Okay. You looked really... well, not okay." She chuckles and shrugs "Enjoy your evening." Then she waddles away through the crowd, soon disappearing and I can no longer see any signs of her.

For a moment everything feels right like everything is the way it's supposed to be. I watch her leave. I observe the gentle sway of her hips, how she walks, putting one leg in front of the other, her brown hair dancing in the rhythm of her walk. I don't even know what I find so intriguing about her, I'm not that into brunettes.

It's when she's completely gone that it hits me "Hey! Wait!" I push people away, some yell at me what the hell am I doing and that I'm ruining their party, but I don't care. I want to find that girl. "Hey!" I yell over the crowd, still moving forward. "Stop! Wait up!" I want to spend the evening with that girl. She would take care of me, she seems like the type. I stop in the middle of the dancefloor to take a quick rest and to let my lungs adjust to this choking air, before I go towards the other side of the dancefloor, continuing my mission. Damn, you short girls, you can hide so easily!

Once I break from the crowd, I nearly crumble. That was... WAY too exhausting. I glance around and there I see my bar. Would you look at that? I look for one thing and find the other, what a cliche. I give away a snort which cannot be heard by anyone due to the loud music blaring. I sit behind the counter and keep my eyes on people like a hawk.

"You wanna order anything?" The waitress asks me while wiping one of the glasses and chewing a disgustingly big chewing gum.

I suppress the need to cringe and concentrate hard on imagining various drinks. In the end, I end up looking like a total softball "A glass of water should do."

"Wow, okay, grandpa." She says and walks away.

I give her a look with tightly together pressed lips and once she brings me my glass of water, I drink it in one go. I notice the waitress observing me with a pitiful smile and I just want to over-dominate her and show her she's the pitiful one with her pink, green, violet and platinum blonde strands of hair. I'll give you a grandpa.

"Two shots of Hendri-" I am interrupted by a short figure in a dark green dress walking past me. It shuts me down and my eyes follow her eagerly. "Wait up! Eh-..." Yeah... Awkward... Not knowing her name and all. I can't call her by the colour of her dress, at least a hundred of people in the club is wearing green!

I stop in my tracks and ask myself what am I even doing, going on a wild-goose chase. That's not what I do. Why is this girl any different?

She showed concern.

She was hot.

She seemed nice.

She was vulnerable.

Nate?!

Shut up!

Patty's words are following me everywhere. Lonely? Me? Baby, I enjoy every night. I bet Danny isn't up to the task now that you're roaming around with inflated belly.

My mind starts to feel dizzy from all the thinking. My thoughts begin with memories of Patty being my girlfriend right to the point when I got employed and until the very end when I met this cute like brunette in a green dress. I don't even know why I want to spend the evening with her, she just seems the right type of a girl for this night. So innocent and proper... Gentle and sweet... But not like a lollipop or a popsicle, like so much more.

I am once again lost and when I recall seeing her talking to one of the girls that are now standing right next to me, I figure that very friend or an acquaintance could lead me to the baby girl. Sometimes I am just surprised at my own luck, really. All the right coincidences just fall into my hands. Pretty cool.

I gently pull on her arm, so she looks at me. For a moment I startle her, I can't blame her though. A club is a place where you meet all sorts of people. I bend down to her, so she can hear me through the music "Hey, uh, have you seen anywhere a girl in green dress and with really long brown hair? I seemed to have lost her in the club and now I can't find her anywhere."

She eyes me a little, probably weighing the situation then finally agrees to help me "Yeah, sure. I think she went to the bathroom. C'mon, let's go."

"Thank you!"

She takes my hand and together we gladiate our way to the bathrooms, where... well, it could smell better. Hundreds of girls are standing in the line or should I say in the group, waiting for one of the cabins to open. Looking at all the young girls with their breasts and asses almost fully revealed it makes me regret I even came here. To make the situation all worse, DJ starts to play an annoying techno music and even turning up the volume. Girls here in front of the bathroom are so drunk, they start rubbing butts and junks against each other, some even start kissing sloppily. Even though I'm a guy and I like when two girls are very good friends, this is downright disgusting. It is obvious they are just making out, 'cause they are horny like hell and try to get someone's attention. Just sad, really. And I know what I'm talking about, I've been with a couple of girls like them. It was fucking amazing, both praising you like a god, doing scenes just for you to get horny, needy and ready... Girls are awesome.

A friend of the girl in green dress waits with me, then starts feeling bored and anticipated, maybe even worried about it "I will go check if she's inside. Can I just ask, why are you looking for her?"

"I'd like to take her home," I say, not even flinching. She's her friend and she should know what I'd like to do to her BFF and a worried girl-friend can be a very dangerous thing. Been there, done that, very impressed.

"Aha. Okay. I'll be right back." She says and gives me an odd polite smile, which leaves me awkwardly, oddly and politely smiling back at her.

What is wrong with today's day?

She doesn't go far to ask where the girl is if she is still in the bathroom or what, and I can hear every word she says. "Have you seen Becca? She told me she'll go to the bathroom and now she hasn't returned. Also, someone is looking for her. I think it's her Dad."

Darkness falls on my eyes as they avert back at the horrid words I hear. Every bit of control I have is suddenly put to use to keep myself from jumping at her and choke her to death. "A what?" I chuckle nervously to suppress my anger "Her... Dad?"

Girls all look at each other confused and almost in agreement. The sight and thought of that scare me. "Aren't you? You said you'd like to take her home."

Yeah, I'd also like to feed her baby food. "Not that kind of taking home." I keep my expression blank, which always intimidates the shit out of stupid girls like them. But instead of all of them falling on their knees, they burst out into loud laughter and giggles, grabbing the attention of other girls and some guys around us.

"You?!" They begin to laugh again and again and again, whenever they find the time to look at me. I'm a fucking stud, okay?

"What's going on here?" Becca comes from the cabin, looking fresh and also a little pale. Oof, a tough night that girl is having. One look at her round face makes me smile instinctively. She really is a baby girl.

Group of girls start wheezing and crying with laughter and can't even bring themselves to tell her what just happened. I start looking around in annoyance. Girls like them are giving others a bad name, I swear to God. Luckily, one of them finally manages to tell Becca why are they laughing so hard. The way that girl tells her story really does make it sound weird and desperate. I can almost imagine myself being a Dad, looking for his lost and cute daughter. Come home for Daddy?

Becca gives me a misunderstood look like she's trying to comprehend what she just heard "Wait... You thought..." She checks me out and quickly looks at her friends in embarrassment. I know, no manners at all.

C'mon, baby. Tell them how stupid they are. "You bumped into me earlier and you were nice, so-"

"So, you thought I want to have sex with you?!" She exclaims, obviously hurt.

"Well... No. Not technically. You just seemed nice and thought we could get to know and maybe go home together later in the evening." I add, adding a proud smile after I prove her I'm not a douchebag who'd just jump her in the middle of the dancefloor. I'm not an animal.

"But... You're too old for me..."

Song Nathan listened to:  Bruce Springsteen - I'm On Fire

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~ Blackie