sherlock walked the coffee over to the table, setting one down in front on john then taking a seat across from him.

"thank you." john said to sherlock then sipped his coffee.

"my pleasure." sherlock said and gave john a small smile.

"sorry that took so long," sholto said as he sat down next to john, "my parents just wanted to make sure i'm still breathing." he said with a small laugh. "are you coming to the party, sherlock?" he asked as he put an arm around john.

sherlock nodded. "yeah, wouldn't miss it." he said and took a sip of his coffee.

"great," sholto smiled then turned to john.

they started a conversation, leaving sherlock out, but that's what you get for third wheeling. sherlock had invited john out for coffee, but didn't think he'd bring sholto with him. he knew john would, but he was hoping it was going to be just them this time. he thought about the party to get his mind off of the couple in front of him. especially since he liked john. sholto's parents were out of town, so he was throwing a party like every other teenager would. him and john used to best friends until he started dating sholto then john sort of stopped talking sherlock. they never hung out anymore like they used to and if they did, sholto was always there. sherlock thought it was because sholto didn't like him and john being alone, but that was just a theory. he was jealous of the couple. jealous that sholto got john instead of him. he was mad at himself for thinking john would never find someone and he can wait to ask him out, but john did. and now that chance was gone.

"i'm gonna get going." sherlock said and stood up, putting his coat on.

"aw," john frowned. "really?"

sherlock nodded and grabbed his coffee. "i was really hoping today would just be us cause it's been a while since we just hung out." he admitted with a sigh. "but it's cool. being a third wheel is my specialty. i'll see you guys at the party." he said and ignored the stare from sholto and the apologetic look from john by turning and walking out of the coffee shop.

saturday night, sherlock went to the party with greg and molly. once they got there, molly got distracted and went outside to talk with the people out there while greg and sherlock just walked around. sherlock spotted john and sholto outside dancing and he sighed, turning the other way.

"you've been acting weird lately. everything alright?" greg asked, noticing sherlock turn away.

sherlock nodded. "yeah. fine." he said and cleared his throat. "do you want a drink?" he asked his friend.

greg stared at sherlock. "look, i know. myc told me. if you want to leave, i'll take you home." he said softly.

sherlock looked over at the couple and saw that now they were kissing. he sighed and shook his head, giving greg a sad smile. "i'm fine. gotta get over it any ways," he admitted with a chuckle, holding back the tears. "i'm never going to be with him." he said then turned on the balls of his feet, heading over to the kitchen where the drinks were.

after a few drinks, sherlock loosened up a bit, but kept to himself. he stayed inside and away from john, playing just dance and defeating everyone who dared to challenge him. eventually, john came inside to get a refill on sholto's drink and saw sherlock dancing. he forgot about his boyfriend's drink and went over to his friend, waiting until the song finished.

"mind if i go next?" john asked sherlock with a hopeful smile.

sherlock looked at him then noticed sholto wasn't around. "not at all," he smiled.

john went to the left side, taking the remote from irene who had just lost. sherlock let john choose the song then they started. they used to play this all day when they were younger and john's parents got him a wii for christmas. it was always a tie with them and it was now, so it drew more attention. it drew sholto inside after john hadn't come back inside after a few minutes. he stood and watched his boyfriend dance with his best friend, a bit salty about it.

"boom!" john exclaimed. "i just kicked your ass!" he laughed, pointing at sherlock.

sherlock laughed with him. "in my defense, i have been dancing for the past thirty minutes."

"i don't care! i kicked your ass. now deal with it." john said and poked sherlock's chest, causing the brunette to laugh more. john turned his head and noticed sholto standing behind the sofa. he gave sherlock the remote then went over to his boyfriend, sherlock watching, then turning his head once sholto kissed him. he felt his heart drop in his chest and he sighed.

"i am retiring, someone else can play." he said and set the remotes on the coffee table that was pushed to the side. he pushed passed people and found his way out to the back yard. he went over to the corner where the gate was since it was hidden and took a pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket. he pulled out a cigarette and placed it between his lips as he leaned against the wooden fence about as tall as him. he pulled a lighter out of the carton and light the smoke, then tucked the lighter back into the pack then put it in his pocket again. he had a perfect view of the backyard and could see everyone and everything. john and sholto weren't outside, so that meant they were inside and sherlock decided once he finished his cigarette, he was leaving.  

he put the bud out on the gate then dropped it on the ground, going back inside. he decided to say goodbye to john before he left since that was the proper thing to do and he couldn't find him downstairs, so he went upstairs. there were people up there in the family room, but none of them were john. he sighed and walked down the hallway, walking passed sholto's room where the door was opened. he peeked inside and saw john laying on the bed with sholto on top of him as they snogged.

"you might wanna close the door." sherlock said, causing both boys to look up at him. he ignored their stares and closed the door, storming out of the house. he walked down the street in a fit of anger as he felt his heart tighten in his chest and the sticky feeling of dry tears on his face. he sniffled and wiped his face, starting to jog a bit. then his jog turned into a run. then his run turned into a full on sprint until he couldn't sprint any more.

he ended up at the clearing about half a mile from where he lived. of course he did. this where him and john would go. this is where him and john would study. this is where he developed his feelings for john. this is where he fell in love with john. now it was gone. all of it was gone. wiped away like their friendship didn't exist anymore. and it didn't. sherlock felt the tears coming but held that warm feeling back. he held them back and it soon turned into a scream. a loud scream that people miles away could hear. sherlock dropped to his knees, sobbing as he held himself.

after a week of nothing, john went to sherlock's house and mycroft answered the door. mycroft said sherlock wasn't home and when john asked where he was he said he didn't know. then john hunted down greg the next day at school, knowing he still talked with sherlock. he pulled him out to the garden and made him sit on the bench and stared at him.

"what is up with sherlock?" john asked greg. "and i know you talk to him, so don't lie."

greg sighed and looked at john. "i don't know. we haven't talked since the party."

"greg." john said in a tone greg had never used before, causing him to get scared.

"i swear. i haven't talked to sherlock since the night of the party and all i asked is if he got home alright. i swear."

john groaned and sat next to greg. "then why is he being so distant lately?" he asked.

greg shrugged. "did you go to his house?" he asked, not wanting to tell john the truth.

john nodded. "mycroft wouldn't tell me. sherlock and i are best friends, why wouldn't he tell me?" he asked.

"are you sure you're best friends?" greg asked, not thinking.

"what does that mean?" john asked, watching greg carefully.

"i- i gotta go." greg said and picked his bag up. "myc and i have a date and i need to get ready." he said and stood up, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

"greg."

there was that tone again. greg sighed and turned around to face john. it was now or never. "he's in love with you." greg said and watched john.

the blond furrowed his brows. "what?"

"sherlock holmes is in love with you, ya bloody idiot!" greg exclaimed. "you're so fucking blind! jesus!" he said and sighed. "it hurts him to be around you now. ever since he saw you and sholto snogging at the party."

john shook his head. "he's not in love with me," he chuckled. "he's my best friend. he would've said something if he was."

"jesus christ," greg groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. "whatever. i'm done. have fun figuring this out." he said then walked away before john could say anything.

john sat there and thought about sherlock. there was no way he was in love with him. they were too close for that. they were practically raised together. he sighed and got up from the bench, ignoring every word greg had said and was focused on getting answers.

"hi, mrs holmes." john smiled at the woman that answered the door. "is sherlock here?"

the woman nodded. "he's just right upstairs. you can go see him." she said and stepped out of the way so john could come through.

john thanked her then head for the steps, skipping every other one as he bounded up the steps. he walked down the wide hallways until he stopped at sherlock's door. he opened it and stood in the doorway as he made eye contact with the brunette who was sitting at his desk.

"no sholto?" sherlock asked, looking back down at his opened text books.

john sighed at sherlock's remark and closed the door. "no. i need to talk to you."

"about?" sherlock responded swiftly.

"greg told me you were in love with me. is that true?" john asked.

there it was. the punch in the stomach sherlock was waiting for. he sat there for a minute before glancing at the blond standing at his door before saying, "yes."

john took a deep breath and stared at his friend. "look at me." he demanded.

sherlock kept his focus on the open text book in front of him.

"i said look at me!" john slightly shouted.

"get out." sherlock gritted through his teeth, biting back the sobs. "get out of my room. get out of my house. get out of my life for all i care."

john felt tears rising himself. only because he was losing his best friend. "sherlock, don't."

sherlock looked at john. his face a deep shade of red and his eye bloodshot from crying. "you've caused this." he gritted through his teeth, point at his face. "i don't want you here anymore. i don't want to see you anymore."

"sherlock. please." john begged. "don't do this."

sherlock rose from his chair and stared at john, his chest heaving. "get the fuck out." he growled.

the door opened and mycroft appeared. "i think it's time for you to go, john." he said and stared at his brother while he pulled john out of the room. he pulled john out then closed the door, giving him a glare before going back into his brother's room.

john could hear the sobbing and realized what he had done. realized that sherlock really did love him. realized that it'd be impossible to get their relationship back. he wiped his face then left the house, going back out to his car and getting in, starting it and driving off.

the next day at school neither john or sherlock showed. they were both overwhelmed by feeling and just couldn't handle each other or anything. john spent the entire day thinking. thinking about his and sherlock's relationship, thinking about how sherlock's attitude completely changed after he learned that him and sholto go together. remembered the day at the coffee shop when sherlock left. remembered the time at the party when sherlock caught him and sholto. sherlock had lasted this long. lasted this long being happy for john and sholto, always being a third wheel and feeling left out of john's life. john gave him kudos for lasting a year and a half, but then his feelings started to surface as he thought about sherlock.

john thought about it long and hard before sucking it up and getting out of bed. it was time he faced reality. the cliche reality where he was actually in love with his best friend and not the boy he was dating.

he got to sherlock’s and mycroft wouldn’t let him in, so john tackled him like in rugby then sprinted up to sherlock’s room. he ran in and closed the door behind him, locking it. “we need to talk.” he panted, looking at the boy sitting up in bed.

“we talked yesterday.” sherlock said and looked back down at his book.

“no, sherlock. we did not talk.” john said as he started to step closer to the bed. “you said something and i didn’t get to discuss it with you.”

“there’s nothing to discuss.” sherlock responded as he kept his eyes on his book. “you’re with sholto and you don’t like me the way i like you.”

john sighed and took a last step to the bed. “you need to look at me.” he said.

sherlock kept his head down and fiddled with the corner of his page.

john was not having his stubbornness and tore the book from sherlock. “look at me. look at me so i can say this one thing to you.” he said and dropped the book on the floor.

sherlock lifted his head slowly and gained eye contact with the blond. “what?” he asked harshly. “what do you want?”

john looked down at his feet and took a deep breath before looking up at sherlock. “i love you.”

“no you don’t.” sherlock said, shaking his head with a small chuckle.

john wasn’t in the mood for sherlock’s attitude and kneeled on the bed, cupping sherlock’s cheek and pulling his face until he met his, kissing him deeply. sherlock kissed back. he actually kissed back, pushing john back and slotting a knee between his legs.

sherlock pulled back and smiled down at the blond, placing a soft kiss on his forehead. “i love you,” he whispered.

“i love you, too.” john smiled.