I've been pacing back and forth for a while now. It's not every day I get a chance to work with one of the members of Stray Kids. It's also not every day that I get to hear that I might be debuting as a single artist soon.

My career started off by playing the guitar in the streets. It was for fun at first but when I realized that people will actually pay to hear me sing, I made that as a job for myself. But then this strange lady came up to me asking if I wanted to come in for an audition. It was sketchy so I turned it down but when she gave me her business card, later that day I went on the website to check it out.

She wasn't kidding. So I applied for an audition.

Now I'm a trainee and soon to debut. But first, a collab with one of the members of Stray Kids(and also my childhood friend). Not only will I be singing an original but I will be trying out a dance that he choreographed for the song. Just a big FYI, I suck at dancing. You can even ask my date for prom for which he will give you a story about how I not only stepped on his new shoes but I made him trip onto the buffet table. The date ended there.

"Hey, I need you to slap me", I told my sister who was copying the dance from PSY's 'Gentleman'.

She stopped dancing and looked at me with a WTF face, "what for?"

"I'm nervous. In a bit, I have to go meet up with the members of Stray Kids so they can critique my song and after that I will be working with Hyunjin who's gonna see me fail at perfecting the choreography he made. I'm gonna look like an idiot", I sat down on her queen size bed that held many, many fluffy pillows and stuffed animals.

"Dude, your songs are great, your voice is amazing, and your dancing isn't that bad. Just make sure you don't do the chicken dance in front of them. Remember what happened last time? You scared my date", she mentioned before turning off her tv.

"I did that on purpose. He was no good for you anyway. If he can't stand to be around your crazy sister, he's not the one. But seriously, slap me", I said.

"I'm not gonna slap you. By the way, are you going like that?", she asked, referring to my outfit.

Some black joggers and a white t-shirt. It's clothes, no big deal. Hyunjin has seen me at my worst and did not judge me one bit.

"If you want to impress them, you have to look good. I can let you borrow something but it'll probably fit you a little big since you're short. How is it that you're my older sister yet you're short?", she commented on my height.

Being 5'3" is no fun. I can never reach....anything actually. Because of Hyunjin, my sister calls me Jellybean or just bean. He came up with the nickname and it just stuck. He says it fits because I'm small and sweet.

I can hear her struggling inside her walk-in closet. Oh to be the favorite child.

"I have a black crop top and jean shorts. You can tie my flannel around your waist to make it look better. And just wear your black sneakers. And for your hair, you can't really do much because it's so short(like you) but put clips on the front. And leave a few strands of hair out", she explained while I changed into the clothes.

She was right. The clothes fit a little bit too big but it's not bad. She ended up styling my hair the way she explained.

"I have to go. I can't be late", I thanked her for helping me before leaving the house with my things.

I hopped into my car and drove off to the destination.

Traffic sucked, it's so hot out and the AC doesn't work, I'm a few minutes late to the meeting. They're gonna call me unprofessional.

As soon as I parked the car (in which I'll be facing a parking ticket once I leave because guess who didn't park in the correct space?), I ran in and hoped the elevator isn't slow. I was jumping on the heels of my feet, watching which floor the elevator is stopping on.

"Shit", I muttered quietly before heading for the stairs. The stairs are my biggest enemy, always leaving me with cramps in my leg and the feeling of being stabbed in the lung repeatedly...or am I just exaggerating?

"I'm here! Sorry I'm late. There was so much traffic", I began to apologize as soon as I met up with the guys who have been waiting half an hour in the studio. I'm hoping I don't smell like sweat. The new deodorant I bought is supposed to help in stressful situations.

"It's totally fine. At least you have an excuse. Hyunjin and Han aren't even here yet", Chan smiled and offered me a seat.

There are only six of them waiting, sipping on their bubble teas and going through their phone. The only one who's actually doing work is Chan. He's looking over my song.

My hands are clammy so I wiped them off on the flannel. I wondered what he thinks of it.

"So, have you guys listened to the song already?", I asked them, they nodded.

"I like it", Jeongin said with a smile. Minho began teasing him. He's the Maknae, it comes with the job.

"Yeah, I think it'll sound great with Hyunjin's voice too. But first we have to hear how your voices sound together because if we just record it and not make any adjustments, the song will flop", Chan commented.

I nodded and faced down at my lap. I can hear whispering coming from far down the table.

"Hey, did you really know Hyunjin since you were eight years old?", Changbin asked.

"Yeah. We met at the park. Why?", I asked but in return was asked another question.

"How did you guys meet?", he asked, wanting me to be more specific with my answers.

I raised an eyebrow, feeling hesitant to respond but did anyway, "um..he was going down the slide but because he was so skinny he slid down too fast and fell on his face. He cried because his nose was bleeding and he thought he was gonna die from blood loss but I reassured him that he was fine and helped him get cleaned up."

As I finished up with that little story, Hyunjin and Han stepped into the studio while holding vanilla milkshakes.

"Yah, liar. You told us you met her because she wanted to share an ice cream. Turns out you were just a cry baby", Minho said to Hyunjin who became flustered.

"Aren't we supposed to be talking about her song? Seems like everyone is distracted", Hyunjin sat down next to me and smiled, "long time no see. How long has it been? A year?"

I nodded, "Yeah. It's been a while."

Everyone can feel the weird tension roaming in the room. They're not sure how to feel about it.

"What took you two so long?", Chan asked.

Han pointed around Hyunjin who just shrugged his shoulders. Sighing, Chan handed everyone a copy of my song so we can work on it and decide whether a few things need to be added or changed.

It's a little embarrassing to have one of my closest friends read an original song from me that had to do with my struggles growing up. Why? Because he didn't know about those struggles. Every time I was with him, I had to pretend everything was okay by replacing my frown with a fake smile. It sure fooled him.

"I think a soft melody will go really well with this type of song. It'll carry the meaning into it", Minho commented.

"Right. Plus, Hyunjin already came up with the choreography. Contemporary, correct?", Chan turned to Hyunjin who nodded.

I felt a little left out as they discussed what type of beats and rhythm it should have, how the choreography is supposed to match the song, how our voices are supposed to sound. I felt a little lost.

"What do you think (y/n)?", Chan's voice shook me from my thoughts.

"Do you want to add anything?", Hyunjin asked.

"..I...don't know", I mumbled. It's not my fault I know nothing of the correct terms in music or dancing. I'm just starting!

The guys glanced at each other.

"Do you know nothing about music?", Minho asked, not realizing it sounded a bit harsh.

Hyunjin threw his hat at him, telling him to be nice.

"Alright, how about you two head on in so we can begin recording", Chan opened his laptop and prepared everything he needed.

I followed Hyunjin into the little booth and stood in front...well not really in front...more like stood under the microphone.

"I need a stool..or something", I told Hyunjin.

He tried his hardest not to laugh and grabbed the small black box that is used for short people. That's how Hyunjin would describe it.

I stepped on the box and put on the headphones, waiting for instructions. It's probably so obvious that I'm super nervous because Hyunjin tapped my shoulder and gave me a thumbs up as he smiled. Did it make me less nervous? No, it actually made me more nervous because he's looking so hot right now.

God must love Hyunjin to make him so perfect. WTF went so wrong with me? Sugar, Spice, and Everything Nice? More like Ugly, Depressed, and Life's A Mess.

The first take was horrible because my voice cracked. I couldn't see but I knew the rest of them were laughing. Just wanted to go home and live under my bed. I'd probably have more of a chance becoming famous and my fans would be all the dust bunnies living under my bed.

It took us almost five hours to complete the song. I'm not sure how long it usually takes them to finish a song but my reason is because how many times I had to stop to correct myself. Thankfully Hyunjin didn't laugh and instead encouraged me.

"Okay, so I'm gonna edit everything and I'll send the song to your email. Listen to it and get together to work on the dance. Great job today", Chan smiled at me and waved as I stepped out of the studio.

Hyunjin followed behind me and offered a gummy bear, "you have any plans?"

"I was gonna go home and contemplate on either smashing my face against a pillow from my embarrassment today or run into a wall until I have no memory of what happened", I said.

"Geez, your dark humor is brutal. Jellybeans are supposed to be sweet. Unless you turned into a green bean", he joked, letting out that laugh that sounded like angels coming down from heaven.

"I am a black bean with a dark soul. I'm an emo-bean", I said.

"Jokes aside, wanna go to the pond? I have a friend I want you to meet", he asked.

"Is it the Loch Ness Monster? Because if so, I'm down", I said.

"It's not the Loch Ness Monster. Even better", he smiled.

Rolling my eyes, I nodded and told him to follow towards my car. He's surprised I even have my driver's license. He remembers me telling him that I couldn't even be in a car without having some sort of panic attack. Turns out I said that out of exaggeration.

"No one's here", I said as I looked around.

The pond is in front of us and the trees spread around it, along with flowers and small bushes.

Hyunjin sat down on the grass, patting the spot next to him. I sat down and watched as he took out a small bag containing bread crumbs. As he shook the bag, I can hear quacking coming from afar. Not a second later, I see a white duck flapping it's wings while walking towards us.

I didn't mention that birds scare the living daylights out of me. It can be any bird: a pigeon, a chicken, it can even be a kiwi bird.

I stood up and took a few steps back.
"It's okay. She won't do anything to you. She's harmless", Hyunjin smiled softly as he pet the duck's head.

"..she?..is she yours?", I asked, carefully sitting next to him.

"No. I found her here a few months back. Hardly anyone comes here. She won't go near them except me. I call her Becks. I don't know, that name just came to me. She keeps me company", he said.

Becks waddle her way towards me and just stared at me while quacking. I didn't know if she was planning to attack me because she has no idea who I am.

"She likes you", he chuckled.

"How can you tell? You speak duck?", I asked, not moving an inch.

"No. She's moving her tail. If she felt threatened, she would've hissed. It's quite scary actually. She did it the first time she saw me", he said.

He took out a few bread crumbs and spread them around so she can eat.

"So how do you feel about debuting soon? Are you excited?", he asked.

"I'm more nervous than anything. I mean, you saw the way I was back at the studio. I knew nothing of what to say. I'm gonna make a fool out of myself", I sighed.

"You're just a rookie. It's normal to feel that way. I did. But you need to have more confidence in yourself otherwise you'll quit much sooner when you shouldn't. You're really talented, bean. You have to believe that", he patted my back, smiling as Becks continued eating.

"Easy for you to say. People already like you. Have you seen how many proposals you've gotten? I'm sure there won't be a single proposal for me", I joked.

"Jealous?", he smirked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Oh yeah because it's my dream to marry an idol", I said sarcastically, "seriously though, how do you deal with stress and your nerves?"

"I come here. You don't feel relaxed?", he asked.I shook my head.

"Well that's because you're overthinking. Clear your head and relax", he said.

Huffing out a breath, I closed my eyes and tried to go to a happy place. While I did that, Hyunjin watched as my breathing slowed down. But then his eyes went up to my face. Nothing has changed except the length of my hair.

He remembers wanting to comb his fingers through my hair. Back then, it stopped near my elbows. Now it's above my shoulders and lots of layers. Though he doesn't care about that. All he's thinking is how amazing I look.

He brought his hand up to my cheek and pushed a few strands of hair behind my ear. It startled me a bit but as I met eyes with him, I felt...different?

"Short hair suits you", he smiled.

"Of course you'd say that. You have the same hair length. We could be mistaken as twins, that's if you had boobs", I said.

"Anyway, the choreography...is it gonna be hard for me? And don't say yes because you're already experienced", I nudged his arm.

"I mean, it'll be difficult at first. And yes, you'll become frustrated. But that's to be expected. You can't be perfect at the first try. Practice makes perfect and you'll do an incredible job", he said.

"I hope so", I sighed and rested my chin on my knees as I brought them up.

Three days later, Chan sent me the song. I listened to it and it's fantastic, not to toot my own horn. I couldn't do it without them though.

"Did you listen to it yet??", I asked Hyunjin through the phone, jumping on the bed.

"Yes I did. It's even better. Wanna meet up later to work on the choreography? The sooner the better."

"Yeah I'll meet you at the practice room around 4? I have to take my sister somewhere at 3", I said.

"Sounds good!"

After hanging up, my sister came into my room with a smirk on her face.

"What is up with you?", I asked, sitting on my bed.

"Nothing. Just you and Hyunjin have been talking a lot more these days", she said, going through my notebook filled with songs that I created.

"Okay? I work with him. I'm supposed to be talking to him", I said.

"Really? The project you're working on is about how cute your hair looks in tiny ponytails?", she raised an eyebrow and noticed my sudden reaction.

"..we were catching up. It's been a year. I have my best friend back. It feels nice", I said, twirling a loose string from my socks.

"Do you still have feelings for him? Because you know nothing can happen between you two, right? Remember, the reason why you're here is to make your dreams come true about becoming an idol. Don't let love blind you", she smiled softly before patting my knee.

"I know nothing can happen. That's why I'm trying to keep it professional....but it's hard since he keeps smiling at me. He looks like an angel from heaven, a flawless prince, a–"

"Yes we get it. He's hot AF. That's not helping your situation. Focus on your song, on the dance, that's it. Don't think about kissing him or wanting to braid his hair or whatever", she said before stepping out of my room.

"I wasn't even thinking about that until you said it", I mumbled to myself before letting my back rest on the bed, covering my face with the pillow.

I'm in the practice room, waiting for Hyunjin to arrive. While doing so, I decided to stretch because I don't wanna pull a muscle....or pull something I don't have.

"(Y/n), hey!"

Chan entered with a smile on his face. He sat down near me and asked if I wanted a water bottle which I accepted.

"So did you like how I edited the song? Took me some time to find the right beat to it", he said.

"You really did an amazing job with the song. It sounds beautiful. I really love it", I said.

"No it was all you. You created the song. It has a beautiful meaning behind it. I'm sure the struggles you went through have subsided and hopefully you're much better now", he said.

"I am. Thanks. I feel like everything is going the way I wanted it to. It's kinda scary though", I admitted.

"I know the feeling. That will go away. Maybe you can show me any of your other songs? If that's okay with you", he said.

"Yeah, that's totally fine with me. Well right now I only have maybe five songs written. But when I have an idea for a song, I quickly write it down so I won't forget", I said.

Hyunjin came in a few seconds later, nodding as he placed his duffel bag on the floor and headed towards me.

"Imma let you guys practice then", Chan smiled before leaving.

I stood up and watched as Hyunjin put his hair in a ponytail, let a few strands of hair fall loose at the front.

"Sorry I'm late. Minho and Seungmin were using the car and it broke down so I had to run all the way here", he said.

"Really? You must be tired. We can do this another time–"

"No, I'm fine. Anyway, the sooner we're done with practice, the sooner we can go out to eat. The shop at the corner is giving away free coupons and we can get tacos and a free drink", he said.

"How long are we gonna practice?", I asked.

"Depending on how much we get done today. So let's get started."

I just wanted to throw myself into the garbage can because I felt like trash. Mostly because I keep tripping and messing up. Maybe I'm wasting my time..and his.

"You know, maybe we can just go without the choreography. I'm messing it up and I feel like I won't get it right. You're more experienced and you dance it way better than I do. Maybe you can do this alone. I like how you do it. With me, it's just gonna be a mess", I said, wiping the sweat from my forehead.

"We both sang the song so we're both gonna do this choreography. We have plenty of time to perfect it. We're not gonna get it on one go", he said.

Huffing out a breath, I stood at the center of the practice room. Hyunjin stood behind me so he can see how I'm doing the moves. When he does it, it looks so elegant while I just look like I'm a constipated robot.

"You're too tense. When you bring your leg up, you start losing your balance", he stood behind me, chest against my back, while he placed his hand on my stomach, "you need to tighten your core. That will help with your balance."

I couldn't really focus because the stupid thumping coming from my chest and the warmth feeling on my face kept distracting me from what I really need to do. He guided me to stand on one foot while I raise the other one. His hand held the leg that was in the air and told me to keep hold for about ten seconds.

"It hurts", I shut my eyes and tried not to stumble.

"I know but you'll get used to it", he said.

I groaned and fell forward, catching myself and regained my posture. I tried again and again and on the fifth try, I felt a cramp coming so I put my leg down only to stumble and fall but clumsy me ended up pulling Hyunjin too.

"Ouch", I mumbled while holding onto the back of my head.

"Are you okay?", Hyunjin asked while checking my head.

Though the possible injury on my head is the least of my worries because at the moment I realized the position we were in. He landed on top of me and surprisingly he isn't heavy. He's tall and skinny. I wonder if I can carry him.

Back to the situation...

My eyes landed on his and it literally felt like time stopped. It's weird. He can feel it too.

I never imagined a moment like this to be like what happens in the movies. Guy falls on top of girl, guy apologizes, they stare into each other's eyes and possibly....kiss.

Which is what happened.

He leaned down and kissed me. I kissed him back. My arms wrapped around his neck and his hands slid down to my waist.

It was getting steamy and in my head I'm thinking 'stop this right now' which then lead to my sister's voice getting stuck in my head. I know what she'd say. 'You're ruining your life.'

Am I really?

"Hyunjin..your phone is ringing", I said, hoping that he'd stop because maybe we'll do something we'll regret later. Maybe we're not thinking right.

"They can leave a message", he said, pulling away for a second until he attached his lips to my jaw and then down to my neck.

Before he could even start making a mark that could probably get me in trouble, I pushed him off me (I was in panic mode). I think I pushed him a bit too harshly because he was giving me a WTF look. I felt embarrassed and told him that I had to leave even though we barely got anything done.

"Why in the heck did you do that for?? I told you not to get involved with him!", my sister scolded me even though I'm the older sister. I can make my own decisions and mistakes. Was it even a mistake?

I kept kicking my legs on the bed, remembering the look on Hyunjin's face, "I'm so stupid. I can't help it though. I had a huge crush on him back then and now this?? What am I going to do?"

"Talk to him. You can't leave it at that. You work together now and it can't be awkward. Fix it as soon as you see him", she said, stepping out of the room.

Every few minutes or so, I'd get a phone call from Hyunjin but I don't dare answer. I wish I had the confidence and high self-esteem to answer but all I'm thinking about is the many possible ways I could mess up that phone call. Not answering is basically the same thing.

The next day, I had to go in to meet up with everyone. Apparently Chan has news, very good news, and wants to share it with everyone, including me. I don't know why when I'm not part of the group.

There are these rooms in the building where idols meet up for small meetings and projects. Chan, Minho, I.N, and Hyunjin were already in one of them while waiting for the others.

"Hey, can I talk to you?", Chan asked Hyunjin who was sipping on his second cup of ice coffee.

"What about?", Hyunjin raised an eyebrow while looking down at his phone.

"About (y/n)", Chan replied.

When he did, Hyunjin locked his phone and faced Chan as soon as he heard my name.

"What about her?", he said.

"Do you like her?", Chan asked.

Hyunjin's cheeks slightly turned pink as he saw me walking into the room, heading over to the stack of papers that were close to the door.

"Why are you asking?", Hyunjin asked, all while still looking at me. I hadn't noticed yet as Minho came over to talk to me.

"Well, I wanted to know if you do or you don't that way I won't have to feel bad for being interested in her", he chuckled awkwardly while scratching the back of his neck.

Hyunjin's eyes slightly widened and he can feel his chest hurting. He was quiet for a few seconds before answering, "go ahead."

Chan thanked him and walked over towards me all while Hyunjin turned away but could still hear them.

"(Y/n), good morning", Chan smiled before continuing, "how are you?"

"I'm fine. Kinda curious to what you're gonna tell us. How are you?", I asked.

"I'm great, actually. Um..you know the schedule for today is kind of easy so I was thinking that maybe if you wanna go eat.. after?", he asked and soon wanted to dig his head in a hole somewhere.

"You're inviting me to eat with all of you?", I asked, raising both my eyebrows.

"Uh no...just me. I'm asking if you want to go with me to eat", he repeated.

I didn't think much of it. Just two people talking professionally about music. Doesn't sound too bad.

"Sure. Sounds good", I smiled before passing by him to walk over towards Hyunjin who's back is turned.

"Hey", I said while patting his shoulder.

He didn't look nor say anything. Sighing, I walked around him to look at his face but he avoided my eyes.

"Hyunjin, I'm sorry–"

"For what? Kissed you and you kissed me back. Thought you were enjoying it but from how hard you pushed me yesterday and avoiding my calls afterwards, I was wrong", he said, taking a sip from his ice coffee while looking down at his phone.

"That's not what–"

"Have fun on your date", he finally took one glance up at me. That one glance shows how hurt he is.

"...it's not a date!", I said, which caught others attention.

I sighed and sat down on one of the chairs while the rest of the group came into the room. Chan is excited to tell us that all of us will be performing and be interviewed. Apparently the people who are interviewing us is big and known almost everywhere. The nerves are worse now.

The entire time Chan was talking, I kept glancing over at Hyunjin who looks anything but happy. He didn't look at me, not once. It seems as if he wants to leave and lock himself in his room, not wanting to talk to anyone.

I took out my phone and held it under the table, sending a message to Hyunjin. I could tell that he received it because he looked at his phone b it he didn't bother answering.

We decided to put my song on hold and come up with another song that includes everyone. Everyone was given positions and who will sing what. The meeting didn't take too long only the song has to be done in three days.

"(Y/n), hold on", Chan stopped me as I was trying to catch up with Hyunjin who had already left, turning the corner.

I turned back and smiled at Chan. He grabbed his bag and laptop before walking over to me.

"Ready? I just have to drop these papers off to my manager and we'll get going", he said.

I nodded and followed him towards the opposite direction. What I didn't know was Hyunjin was waiting around the corner and hoped I would go after him..but I didn't. So he left.

"I really think that the songs you'll be writing are gonna be amazing. And I won't forget about your song that's on hold. That will get out, I promise. I do have to say though that performing with us will boost your career", Chan kept talking immediately after being seated by the waiter.

Our food arrived about ten minutes after ordering. Usually when I go out to eat, the food takes almost forty minutes. But who's fault is it? Mine or theirs? It's their fault for taking too long and my fault for waiting.

"Are you okay? You've been picking at your food for about three minutes now. Is something wrong with it?", he asked, catching my attention.

I shook my head and smiled, "I'm fine. And the food is delicious."

He can tell I was lying. Of course there's something wrong and he knows what it's about. Though he does feel like crap.

"It's Hyunjin, isn't it?", he asked.

I quickly glanced up at him and wondered how he figured that out, "..it's not."

"Yes it is. I noticed something wrong when you were talking to him earlier. Is everything alright with you two?", he asked.

"It's nothing, really. We wouldn't be best friends if we didn't argue here and there", I said.

"Argue? So you had an argument? Can I know what it was? Maybe I can help", he offered but I shook my head.

The only person who knows what happened is my sister and she already thinks it's a bad idea to be around Hyunjin. What if I tell Chan? Will he judge and decide that it's best I'm not around the group? I can't take that risk.

"(Y/n), can I be completely honest with you? I think the reason why you're acting this way is because something happened between the two of you. Yesterday at practice, you guys were fine. Did something happen after?", he asked, noticing me biting my lip due to my nerves, "I won't tell anyone if it's bad."

Huffing out a breath, I pushed a strand of hair behind my ear and sighed. He placed his hand on top of mine and smiled. It's comforting. It's like anyone can tell him anything and not feel awkward.

"We were just practicing and I fell because I suck. But I pulled him by accident. We kissed and I sort of pushed him off because I freaked out. I left right after and he kept calling and sending me message but I never answered. And earlier today I tried to talk to him but he was upset. And for some reason he thinks this is a date. I tried to explain to him that it isn't a date and that we're just talking about music. I don't know what to do", I explained in one breath.

Chan now understood. He realizes that I have strong feelings for Hyunjin and vice versa. Was he hurt? Yes he was but he wasn't going to admit that because not only will it be awkward and embarrassing but also will make me feel bad for him.

So he kept a smile on his face and patted the top of my hands, "I was right all along. You have feelings for Hyunjin. And he has feelings for you. Is it that hard to admit it to each other? Maybe if you do, he'll talk to you again."

"What...makes you say that? He can't have feelings for me. Me? Are you kidding?", I laughed and shook my head.

"Why is that so hard to believe? The two of you kissed and now you're fighting. Couples do that. I can call him and get him to come down. I won't tell him you're with me. I can say that I dropped you off", he said.

"Even if I do that, we can't be together. Isn't it risky for idols to date? I haven't even debuted yet. How is that gonna make me look? People are gonna think just because I'm with him, I got to debut", I explained.

"Our company is now letting us decided whether we want to date or not. If that happens with you two, they'll clearly explain that the two of you had feelings for each other long before you found out about your debut. You and Hyunjin need to talk if you want it to work out. If not, talk to him either way because this won't look good for your debut."

Chan drove me to their dorm. I waited outside while he called for Hyunjin. Apparently he tricked him into thinking he needed help with a few boxes. And since he's super nice, he didn't decline. Once he stepped out of the building, he spotted me. Though he sighed and turned back to go inside. I ran after him and held his wrist.

"Seriously Hyunjin? Are you that upset that you don't even want to talk to me anymore? I'm trying to fix it here and you won't let me. You don't want anything to do with me anymore, is that it?", I asked, eyes tearing up but trying not to let them fall.

He glanced over his shoulder, eyes as cold as ice before softening as a tear rolled down my face. He turned around and placed his hands inside his pockets.

"Do you know how humiliating it is to do what I did and to be pushed off like trash? And then you just left and avoided me. Then you go off and agree to go out with Chan hyung. How is that fair??", he spat, rolling his eyes.

"It wasn't a date! He even said so!-"

"He asked me if it was alright to ask you out because he's interested! How are you so dense??", he yelled, scaring me a bit.

Sighing, I inhaled and tried to calm down before I became an emotional mess. I stepped forward and carefully wrapped my arms around his waist, looking up at him. He tried resisting, focusing his attention to the yellow car that is parked not too far from us.

"I'm sorry. It just happened so fast and I panicked. And I spoke to Chan about it. Apparently we both have feelings for each other and all that's missing is us verbally confessing", I said, slightly tilting my head to get a glimpse of his face. I can see a hint of red spreading throughout his ears and cheeks.

"So you're just gonna stand there and watch me make a fool out of myself? This isn't one-sided. I know it isn't. Otherwise you wouldn't have kissed me. Remember? You kissed me first", I reminded him but he still wouldn't say anything or even look at me, "Do I have to say it in order for you to talk to me? Fine. I like you. And I mean really really really like you. I've been liking you since we first met. Though it started off as a crush. I've been wanting to tell you for the longest now but when I heard the news about you becoming an idol, I had to keep it to myself. I've been supporting you day and night. I even told my friends to stream all of your music. It's been a hell of a year. When I found out that I would be working with your group, I was excited and a bit nervous. You've gotten more handsome, which made me even more nervous. But yeah, I like you Hyunjin."

He turned right when I mentioned that I like him. He's sure his face is really red but he didn't care. So a smile appeared on his face and his hands went around my waist, pulling me closer.

"So just to make it clear, you don't like Chan hyung. You only like me?", he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Did that whole confession speech not make it clear enough? And you call me dense. Yes, I only like you", I said.

He chuckled softly, "Good. Because I really really really like you too. And I'm gonna make sure everyone knows that."

"For the last time, Chan doesn't like me. And anyway, we still have to talk to the company about it. I don't want any of us to get in trouble. Rather they find out through us than some picture online. So, do you forgive me?", I asked.

"Of course. Just make sure you don't push me like that again when I kiss you. Makes me think I'm a bad kisser, which I know I'm not", he said.

"Okay a) don't get too cocky and b) you were about to do more than just kissing. May I remind you the hickey I almost got from your vampire ass? Seriously, can you not control yourself?", I nudged him softly.

He laughed and apologized before checking my neck. No marks and no spots.

We immediately spoke to their manager and they discussed all the risks and what could happened if we were publicly open with our relationship. It'll even be harder for me because once I debut, all the hate will come in so they told me that if I wanna do this, I have to be strong.

That's exactly what I did. Surprisingly, almost everyone was supportive of our relationship. The hate comments and negativity, at first, did bother me but Hyunjin told me to ignore it and focus on my music.

We performed together and were interviewed. I was nervous because I didn't know what the interviewer was gonna ask. I had expected questions about the relationship but I was wrong. A bunch of questions about how I felt with my debut and to work with the members and what am I looking forward to in the future. My nerves disappeared.

Now, as for my song that I worked with Hyunjin, that got released along with the choreography, which I finally got right after many many attempts. Many enjoyed it and I did too though Hyunjin can't help but tease me every time I made a mistake.

Who knows? Maybe we'll become partners when it comes to song writing.

....I still get called Jellybean, FYI. Even in front of people.