THIS ONE THIS ONE THIS ONE THIS ONE

If you hear incoherent screaming in the distance it is ME and I am not SORRY okay moving on

Okay actually this one might be actually super stupid

Jump cut to me realizing about 95% of the ideas in this book are stupid actually why do I care

Title: 🦅🪶👯👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨🪹🕊️

Summary:
Red-tailed hawks mate for life. Keigo knows this— of course he knows this. His mutation is rooted in the species. It's why he's always been careful not to accidentally hook up with anyone, or get too close to them, or let his fans get too touchy. He doesn't know what might trigger that dormant instinct in him, if he has said instinct at all.

(Spoiler alert: he does. And it just flickered to life for a random young woman in the middle of his local grocery store's chip aisle.)

Notes:

-Before anyone says anything, just... come on. It could be cute

-Like so cute

-Really cute

-Picture this: Hawks has been literally as careful as careful can get half his life trying to make sure his bird brain doesn't register anyone in the "lifetime partner" slot before he's ready and sure. Like, he has tiptoed, has bent over backwards, has practically abstained from the nightlife people gush over and from alcohol for fear of getting drunk and doing something he regrets

-Only for it all to go up in flames at three in the morning at the grocery store, where a woman seems to be debating between two different types of Doritos

-I bet she doesn't do shit either. She probably just says something stupid to herself alone the lines of: "Why the fuck am I here, I need a life."

-She is minding her business. She hasn't even noticed he's standing there.

-And his bird brain is like: "Yes 👹 that one. Now, please."

-Her general quirk/character is based off a Crow. She loves shiny things and trinkets, can mimic voices, is amazing at problem solving and generally pretty smart, sorta fucking insane, can and will hold a grudge, loyal to a fault.

-Crows also mate for life but headcanon that she does not have that immediate zap with Hawks which is like, awkward, but also she is laughing at him for getting stuck with her.

-As a fellow bird, I feel like she'd be super understanding at least. Like, real, actual sympathy. You know when someone sucks in air through their teeth and it sounds like a hiss? She definitely does that and pats him on the back after. It's super awkward.

-Like she feels bad but wtf do you say to that, understanding or not.

-"Wow... I'm uh, so sorry man. That... sucks. Anyway, Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese?"

-Her memory is just fucking phenomenal, and she remembers faces and the names that go with them perfectly. Forever.

-No, hear me out. What if he explains in way more depth exactly what he's feeling and she low-key doesn't give a shit. Like she feels bad but also he's a celebrity, she's a socially awkward recluse. This is not jiving.

-"Oh, uh. Right. I've got work tomorrow. Was nice meeting you."

-Hawks Googling how to flirt bc he's never done it for realsies. Except she's too stupid to know he's flirting so she's just concerned for his health.

-"Why are you only blinking with one eye? Are you okay?"

-Hawks would fr be so done

-What if he has the strange urge to tell her literally everything. Even classified stuff. He can't help it. He spills his life story the first time he actually gets her to come over and hang out at his apartment, because trying to meet in public is a death sentence.

-Also, he wanted to show off his nest, but that's off topic.

-At this point I feel like they're at least kinda friends. So he's venting his shit while she sits on his couch, eats Doritos, and nods supportively. Totally invested. She's here to rally with him.

-I just know she's super chill too. Like she probably just goes with the flow. He can say the most outlandish shit and she's like "yeah, alright." Like girl why would you just accept that. He said he wants to drop a nuke on Siberia or some crazy shit don't you want to know why.

-(She does not want to know and she does not care.)

-((It's bc he has a grudge against a guy with a Baikal Seal quirk and guess where those seals are native to.))

-(((I mean just LOOK at that mf and tell me he wouldn't be like, a horrible person. He commits tax fraud. He's probably homophobic or smth. You can see it in his eyes. He thinks women belong in the kitchen. He is on the verge of committing manslaughter.)))

-((((Those eyes... That's no seal. That's a vengeful human MAN in a suit.))))

-Anyway.

-God she needs a name and appearance

-She needs a lot of things

-Her name is now Ava bc apparently it means bird or birdlike. Black hair, dark purple eyes, fucking— boom. Character. Maybe she's related to Tokoyami, we don't know. Could be a cute tie in.

-Him wondering why tf his cousin is in the office of the hero he's interning under. Ava just waves too, like it's a normal thing. Which like kinda, but also... Huh?

-Wait okay so Ava and Hawks are buddies. He's mentally married to her and she like, sorta mentally marries him back. So when he's telling her all that classified shit and complaining about all his problems, she has the sudden urge to try and solve those problems

-Problems she should not know about. At all. Even slightly.

-He's like "They want me to get information from the League but that means I have to infiltrate them, and it's literally not working. They almost set me on fire last time. It was awful."

-Dear god it is five in the morning someone sedate me I have to get up tomorrow

-Anyway, Ava's bird brain takes his complaint and is like: "Ah. I must get information from the League by joining them. Obviously."

-And she does infiltrate. Like super easily, it's actually kind of sad how simple it is for her to get in. And she like doesn't mention it either. Is she hiding it? No. She just doesn't bring it up.

-Until she gets the information she needs and just fucking drops it on him.

-Half of it is useless shit, but that's only because her memory is so impeccable that she just remembers every painstaking detail. Shigaraki hates toast and eats buttered bread instead in the morning, because he's a fucking lunatic. Toga likes type AB positive best. Spinner owns exactly seventy-two swords. Mr. Compress can shuffle cards twelve different ways.

-Hawks would be so mf horrified bro. Like she only vanishes while he's out on patrol so it's easy not to think about where she goes, so long as she's there when he gets back.

-"I thought you joined a book club."

-"Dude, what book club meets five days a week?"

-The information is useful and works though.

-Imagine he brings her into the fold on some cases bc fuck it and people just assume she's a hero. Automatically. Hawks is backing her, she obviously must have a license. They think Ava is a hero name and just like, don't question it. She's probably just underground anyway. Makes sense to them.

-Like Hawks explains that she went undercover in the League and everyone is like "huh, must be a hero commission mission." Even Aizawa doesn't second guess it. If she infiltrated the League, she's obviously a hero.

-"Tokoyami, I didn't know your cousin was a hero!"

-Tokoyami, horrified bc his cousin definitely is not a hero: "What a mad banquet of darkness."

-Idk it's a fun idea I like it. We love Ava. We love Tokoyami. Hawks is confused, Ava doesn't care enough to be confused, and the League definitely doesn't know what's happening.

-But that's that for now ig

In other news, Snowflake got a, uh... pretty drastic haircut. Please brace yourself. If you have a rat phobia, now is your time to exit.

I promise she's the same dog as before she's just uh

Yeah

P.s. y'all are all GREAT and if you made it this far you're real