NOVEMBER 2ND 1987

It's been a while, hasn't it? What was the last time I even bothered to give an update on my life? March last year? I think it was. Life in Hawkins surely had changed this time around. With my mom back in the house, Richard had to move back to his own place. I haven't seen him in forever because I think my mom doesn't like him. Same as my dad, I've barely been able to call him due to the presence of my mom.

I've also barely seen my friends. For some dumb fucking reason my mom doesn't trust me, a sixteen-year-old, out and about after school and wants me home straight away just so I won't fall prey to the giant gates running across Hawkins. As if they haven't covered those up with metal plates. The metal bandaid does make the perfect terrain for some skateboarding. Yeah, I finally picked that up. Mostly out of respect or something to my best friend who is still in the hospital. Still asleep, but still alive. But I guess skateboarding is kind of cool once you get the hang of it.

El has been out and about training her powers ever since we came back while at the same time avoiding the military that's present in the same town. I haven't seen El at all either because of my direct ties to the military. If my mom figures out where I went, then so will the military. Then obviously, under that rule of thumb, I haven't been using my powers at all either. It feels weird to not be able to tell mom everything about what happened the past few years. But it's for the better. I'm not filled in on what my friends have been doing with project Vecna. It became a sort of mutual agreement to prevent any spillage of info that shouldn't be.

So yeah, I only see my friends at school, which would be Mike, Dustin, Lucas, and then of course... Will. How do I best describe the situation between Will and I?

A soft knock on my window caught my attention, shifting in the chair at my desk to look over and see what it was. I stared directly into Will's eyes, only illuminated by the light shining from inside my room as he himself was covered in the darkness of the night. I got up, walked over and opened the window for him while quietly shushing him to try to be quiet.

As he rolled onto my bed and closed the window, I walked over to my bedroom door to lock it. When I turned around he was on my bed, on his side, raising his eyebrows playfully, trying to seem attractive or something. "You know you look stupid when you do that, right?" I asked him with a slight smile. He simply returned that same smile. "And yet you fall for it every time," he answered, still playfully. I reached the bed, sat down next to him.

"No need to point out my weaknesses all right, we can't have someone hear those," I said, though it wasn't meant to be taken seriously, and neither did Will. He cupped my face right near my chin and gently pulled me closer just to kiss me for a second. Maybe two. Maybe three. Okay, yeah, fine, we've been a bit of Romeo and Juliet these past 18 months, just meeting up secretly in my bedroom for like... a lot of making out.

He pulled away in a bit of confusion. "You'll be at school tomorrow right? You didn't come in today," he noted to which I looked away in a bit of shame and embarrassment. "Didn't feel like it..." I quietly admitted to which Will sighed just slightly, sounding worried. "I know all that shit is weighing hard on you, and I'm not telling you it shouldn't but... I don't know I guess I'm just worried because these 'hiding days' are getting more frequent," he started ranting, to which I pouted a bit. "It's not that much..." I said but Will didn't agree. "Last week you only went in for one day, while just a mere two months ago you would only miss one day a week," he continued and I guess it made me angry because I crossed my arms and looked away.

"Please don't be mad, I'm not mad, I'm just... worried," he said, trying to get my attention but failing. He then softly pouted, put on a pair of puppy dog eyes, got one of my remaining stuffed animals, and proceeded to talk to it like a dumbass. "I think (y/n)'s mad Frederick," he said. I sighed. "His name's not Frederick-" "How do we make it up to (y/n), Frederick, any advice?"

He leaned closer to the stuffed animal, placed his ear near the dude and pretended it was responding. "Mhm, right, right, okay thank you," he then said before turning back to me with those same innocent eyes. "Frederick says we should... kiss... would he be right or wrong in this scenario?" he asked. Okay, that genuinely got me as I couldn't suppress a smile. "Fine, he's right," I said before I was the one initiating our second make-out session.

When he finally got ready to head back to the Wheelers, since that's where he lived now, he carefully got out of the window, but halted halfway. "Hey, uh, (y/n)...?" he said, sounding a bit more serious. "I'm sorry," he then suddenly apologized. "For what?" I asked, looking at him, half still inside my room, half already in the cold, dark November night. "For not uh... making this official yet..." he said, which in words didn't make sense, but yet again, I got it. Same page stuff etcetera.

No, we haven't been an actual couple in the past 18 months. Any time one of us would mention it we'd just kind of chicken out, find excuses to leave and not talk to each other for a few days. It's just that we got a bit addicted to making out. But becoming something real. Something genuine. I guess we didn't want to fully commit to the obvious feelings yet. I was still in a dark place when it came to mental and or emotional health. Still mourning Sky, and traumatized by Max's almost death. Will was struggling with nightmares and hive mind goosebumps he couldn't just shake off. It just... wasn't the time right now to commit to love. Because what if one of us perished before the end? Would life still be worth living for?

---

NOVEMBER 3RD 1987

The next morning I woke up with a little less sadness than usual so I figured, school was worth going to today. Though, I really also had to ask my mom something. "Mom, can I go visit Max at the hospital after school?" I asked, carefully. I knew the chances were low, despite me explaining to her Max was basically my best friend countless of times. She looked up from her paperwork. "How long will you be away?" she asked, trying to sound like a caring mother but there was this sort of strictness in her voice.

"Well uh, school ends at like two, so... maybe I'll be home by five then?" I suggested, still just as careful. After a few seconds of thinking, looking at all the evidence she simply muttered. "You're home by four, not a minute late. Tonight's a cargo night so I won't be home till late," she stated. "Carg- guard?!" I said in disbelief. Cargo nights were a regular according to her, though she never really told me when they were. Tonight must be a special occasion the

---

"Good morning Hawkins! This is WSQK, The Squawk!" Robin's voice boomed over Mike's walkie, which was tapping into a radio broadcast. Will, Holly, and Mike had merged with my biking path to school near Mirkwood. Now, we could all enjoy Robin's radio show she's been running ever since we all got back from California and spring break etcetera. I swear to God her and Steve are always working at some new place.

"It's looking like a regular day in Hawkins, fifty-five degrees, low chance of rain, medium chance of arrest, and high chance of helicopters," she ranted in a sort of sing-songy voice to keep it entertaining. Mostly Holly was entertained though, she couldn't drive straight as long as Robin was talking. Oh, sorry, sorry, I mean Rockin' Robin of course. I don't know if Holly actually knows Robin is like, friends with all of us.

"But, general banality aside-" "What's banality?" Holly asked. "Something like boring... but because of the repetition," Mike tried to explain, his own intelligence betraying him on the spot. I guess Robin really was a nerd as well. "And now, I'm stuck here with you, my fellow quarantine compatriots," Robin continued over the walkie. "If I could be brutally honest? I couldn't be happier," she added. "Thank goodness, at least someone's enjoying the quarantine..." I muttered grumpy to which Will quietly chuckled.

As we drove deeper into town, we passed town square and as if Robin knew where we were, she went on a tangent about it. "Please steer clear of the Military Access Control Zone, aka the Mac-Z, or, as I like to call it, the Big Mac," she continued. Mike rolled his eyes. "She stole my joke," he said, jealous. Will snorted. "It wasn't even that funny," he said.

"...go on that date..." I picked up from Robin, which felt like a personal jab. I tried in all my might to not look at Will who clearly thought the same. "...which is exactly, what yours truly is doing tonight!" Robin announced. I frowned. "I didn't know her and Vickie were a thing?" I asked out loud. Mike groaned slightly. "Yeah, for months, because your stupid mom won't let you out," he said to which I scoffed. "Excuse you, she's just trying to keep me safe for once. It was about time she did something like that," I muttered before the radio broadcast had some weird interference and went radio silent.

---

At school we caught Lucas and Dustin in trouble with one of the jocks. I wasn't gonna try to get in trouble too but luckily Michael fucking Wheeler had evolved into something useful to defend us from those bullies. He actually managed to scare them off but the jock couldn't let a snarky comment about Dustin's outfit slide. Dustin has been wearing the Hellfire shirt ever since Eddie died. I wasn't in Hawkins when it happened and yes, that hurt too. I owed him. More than just drugs money.

"You gotta stop provoking them man," Lucas said as we wandered down the hall. Dustin scoffed. "Oh, so this is my fault?" he asked, trying to just rub in his newfound salty nature. "For what? Wearing a t-shirt?" he added. I rolled my eyes. "Dustin, you know this is about more than just the t-shirt," I said. Dustin snickered. "Real fair coming from you after you hid the truth from us."

Dustin was pretty much the only one still on my ass for that. We had a fight about a year ago, when Eddie's death was still fresh in Dustin's mind. Not that it wasn't fresh now just... fresh-er. I properly opened up about mind-space and everything that had happened in the past years. So, obviously Dustin snapped when he found out I knew Vecna was coming, but in my defense, I didn't remember anything because mind you, I died for a few seconds when Sky told me back in Starcourt. But he just called it bullshit and said some really nasty shit about me.

So, yeah, Dustin partially blamed me for Eddie's death and now he was the bitter and depressed one of the party. As if the torch got passed from me and Max to him. He had been really mean and I'd barely spoken to him since then. Even now, he's still mad.

"I'm not like you guys, turning the other cheek while they spread their bullshit about Hellfire, about Eddie," Dustin muttered in the meantime, still walking down the hallway. Mike frowned. "Eddie never gave a rat's ass about what those mouth breathers were saying about him," Mike said in return. Will immediately chimed in. "I think he would care more about finding and killing Vecna." I quietly bumped his shoulder. Dustin was not going to take that the right way, especially from Will who barely knew the guy.

"Do you seriously think I don't care about that, Will?" Dustin asked, making Will look like a dumbass. Mike sighed. "I think you're fighting two battles when you should be fighting just one," Mike said, trying to take Dustin's line of fire off of me and Will. "We need to keep our heads down, follow the rules, blend in, stay focused on our next crawl," Lucas explained. At the word 'crawl' I covered my ears and thus I didn't hear much else of that conversation. Either way, it ended with Dustin walking off and Will gently dragging me along to class.

---

Lucas opened his can of Dr. Pepper as I mindlessly ate my lunch. "I'm telling you, he's lost his mind," Lucas said, trying to open yet another discussion about Dustin. I groaned, not in the mood to talk about Dustin. Again. "He told me he actually wants to start Hellfire again," Lucas added. I chuckled. "I'd join," I said, not contributing to the conversation. "He was saying something about finding the lost sheep," Lucas muttered, completely ignoring what I said. Maybe I was a lost sheep. "Yeah, he's lost his mind," Mike answered.

"Who's lost his damn mind?" Dustin asked as he almost threateningly sat down in the same spot Eddie used to sit in. He was one move away from placing his legs on the table and killing us simultaneously. I was kind of scared of him not gonna lie. The guys around the table fumbled trying to find a way to cover it up so I just went out on a limb. "The soldier dude my mom follows orders from, apparently they have a cargo night, tonight. Fuckass cargo night has my ass locked at home," I muttered to which all four of the guys looked at me in confusion.

"Are you joking?" Lucas asked, trying to make sure if this was just a cover-up or not. "Uh... maybe in this context?" I answered hesitantly until I felt Mike's eyes drive into my soul. Then I shook my head. "No, my mom said they have a cargo night tonight so I have to stay home," I explained. The four then turned to each other with wide eyes. "Crawl..." Mike muttered before the radio static finally stopped and Rockin' Robin had solved whatever interference caused them to go radio silent earlier.

"Hey there friends, this is Rockin' Robin! Sorry about the abrupt departure, I hope you survived without me!" she said ever so enthusiastically. "We had some annoying technical difficulties," she followed, with emphasis on 'annoying'. "But, to make it up to you we have a very special treat that's sure to turn your day upside down."

I shook my head. I couldn't be present for this, so I walked off as Dustin, Lucas, Will, and Mike got closer to the radio with a notepad and a pen to get the secret code Robin was conveying through her neat little introduction to the song. After they finished that, they headed outside, leaving me on my own in the cafeteria. This was of my own free will though. I'd rather not have the military figure shit out about their 'crawls' and then I'd better avoid the detailed information all together.

Everything was fine until my gut feeling twisted at something. Something happened. That same page feeling took over. That weird feeling of a sort of... shared intellect with Will, when we wanted to say a thousands things to one another but didn't even need the words for it? It happened. And Will wasn't even nearby. This was the first time ever we were connected where I wasn't in the same room as him.

All I could feel was dizziness. Like the sky was spinning but... I was inside. I could feel myself almost fall over but stopped because well? I was sitting at our lunchtable. So two hands on the table kept me from falling over. Weird. Very. Very. Weird.

---

Whatever the spinning was, Mike had his theories according to Will. We were sitting next to each other, but Lucas closest to my favorite ginger. Madmax. She was still in a coma, still sleeping, still healing. Her arms and legs were out of the casts so no more broken bones for her, though the doctors were still unsure whether she'd be able to see again when she would wake up. If she would wake up that is. Kate Bush being present was also a given. After all this time Lucas still hadn't given up on her.

"Mike thinks it could mean that Vecna is close, that he's finally re-emerged," Will explained as I could agree to him describing the feeling as weird, something he didn't feel before. "And if he has, maybe we'll find him tonight," he said, spoiling the fact that their crawls were indeed linked to the cargo nights and that these crawls were about trying to find Vecna. Great. Now I had some information they could torture out of me.

Will turned to Lucas. "What do you think?" he asked him, carefully. Lucas was dead-silent, staring at Max, praying she'd wake up right this moment. And if not this moment, then the next. "You wanna rewind the tape? I'll just go and grab a coke or something caffeinated, cause it's, gonna be a long night," Will then just said as he got up from his chair. "You guys want one?" he then asked. Lucas muttered something about already having had one. I declined. As if I was gonna be doing anything important tonight except for staying at home. Damnit, I wanted to fight. I wanted to be a part of these crawls so bad.

Years and years I had been praying that mom would come home for Christmas and that I'd have a normal life at home. And now? God I wished she never came back.

---

So there I was, at home, around four, like she asked. The only reason she asked it was so that we could still have a nice dinner together at five before she'd leave for her shift at six. She made probably the most disgusting meal ever. After dinner I was vibing in my room, not doing much and in need of a snack, because of course I didn't eat dinner. As if I was going to eat that trash heap that my mom called food.

Heading down the stairs, the doorbell rang almost immediately accompanied by my mom shouting "door!" from the living room where she was enjoying the final few minutes of her dumb soap before heading off to work. I didn't reach the door in time as a knock at the door and a soft, unrecognizable voice telling me to open it followed.

I opened it to see Will. "What are you doing here?" I asked trying to immediately shush him, me myself also whispering. "She can't know you're here," I added as I moved the door close a bit. Will looked down at the ground, disappointed, avoiding all eye contact he could. Then he whispered something to make sure only I heard.

"Crawl. Tonight." I sighed in response. "Yeah, I know," I answered in that same whispering tone. "We need you," he then whispered back, sounding almost pleading. I frowned. "What?" I asked, stepping outside now but making sure the door couldn't fully close and lock me out. "Dustin isn't responding, we need you," he repeated. I... was needed? But... I realized, if I compromised my position in this all, and got all the information, I basically couldn't return home like, ever. I looked at Will, took a very deep breath, and gave him my answer.