Silence.

I sat at the desk in a desolate room in the library, staring at my laptop screen.

The electronic was switched off; as were my emotions. My glassy eyes felt heavy, yet they were unwilling to close.

Slouched in my chair, I let my mind drift over the events of the past couple of months, allowing all of my pent-up feelings to wash over me in small waves.

As I stared at the "Reading is fun!" Poster on the wall opposite me, my mind mind began thinking about all the bad things I had done and convinced me I was a bad person.

Suddenly, the small waves were coming harder and faster as realisation hit me. I was being dragged into a huge sea of emotion and I was beginning to drown. My breathing began to get more ragged and my fingers grabbed onto the edges of the table for support.

A huge tsunami of feelings rushed towards me, forcing tears to trickle down my face. I couldn't give into the thoughts of my life crashing down around me. I couldn't.

The door was abruptly pulled open, and I quickly wiped the tears away from my face, while sniffing quietly. I pulled up the hood of my jacket and switched my laptop on, to pretend to do something.

The intruder sat across from me, in the big room we were in. She didn't look at me or engage in any conversation, so I didn't either.

I mindlessly began looking through pictures on my phone, until I reached one specific one.

It was of two young boys. One of the boys was me. At the age of fifteen, I had hit puberty and had had a lot of acne, which thankfully, went away. Next to me, was another boy. My brother.

He was sprawled, next to me, at the base of a tree. He was three years older than me and was definitely my role model. Although he was 18 and had the power to do things individually or with friends, he would give up opportunities to spend time with me. We were practically inseparable. But that's all changed now that-

"Snap! Snap!" I heard someone clicking their fingers in my face.

Broken from my reverie, I looked up to see the girl who walked in before.

"Your phone's ringing," she stated, before continuing what she was doing.

I glanced down at the device in my hand to see that she was right.

Looking at the caller ID, I sighed and answered the phone.

"Hey mum," I greeted defeatedly.

"Where are you?" She asked rather sharply.

"The library just finishing off some classwork," I replied.

"Hmmm," she answered suspiciously. "Get back home by eight for your dinner then."

"Okay mum. Bye," I quickly replied before hanging up on her. I didn't want to talk to her yet.

I moved my concentration towards my laptop screen and opened up a word document to start some of my work.

I stared at the blank page for a while before I heard a small cough.

I looked up and I was instantly met with grey eyes. Then a voice.

"Do you want to talk about it?" It asked.

I raised an eyebrow and whilst my mind screamed no, my heart and gut argued yes.

So I poured out my heart to this girl.

And it helped. Alot.

It was that moment that I realised that it was okay to open up to someone, even if it was a complete stranger.

__________________________

Hey!

Opening up to someone can be a huge leap into getting better. Don't struggle alone. You might not think people care but they do. Your family, friends and sometimes even teachers care about you and they definitely want you to be the best you.

Das all I wanted to say.

See y'all next month.

-Your favourite dork,
Rajvindork