Cold. The air was too cold. She opened her eyes but saw only blackness. She shivered and felt her bare arms scratch against rough stone. Moonlight cut through the fog then, illuminating the mouth of the cave she laid in. She sat up and let out a quick breath, she watched it in the air for a moment before it was taken by the wind. Wind. She raised a hand, trying to feel the direction but felt nothing, she saw trees swaying, heard the leaves brush against one another but didn't feel anything. She barely even felt the cold now. She stood and saw a torch flicker deeper in the cave. Hesitating, she looked towards the strange forest, but something told her she was supposed to go further. Steeling herself, she stepped deeper into the cave.

She passed things stranger than what she left behind. Butterflies made of precious gems that sounded like delicate bells when they fluttered, stones that gave off sunlight and warmed her skin. She began to feel at ease, and she stopped when she finally saw the torch. No, not a torch, it's a fire. Looking around the rocky space she found herself in, she saw three objects which looked like they were cut from the stones surrounding them. A pestle was the first item she saw, next to it lay a sword, then a magic staff. The sword was familiar, and she went to pick it up.

"Careful" an old man called from next to the fire, she spun and examined him. He sat with a gentle smile, and a twinkle in his eyes. He looked to be unarmed, she was unsure about his presence but for some reason she felt he was trustworthy.

"Why?" She called back to him, not moving from her place next to the sword.

"Because right now, it is time for you to choose." His voice was solemn now, the lightness before had vanished, there was no place for it now. He stood. "The pestle" his steps echoed in the room as he walked towards her. "You could help a lot of people with that tool. The sword, you are familiar with this instrument of course." She nodded at him, she had trained hard for years with the soldiers, and she was one of the best among them, though she hoped never to test it in battle.

"The last is the staff. The tool of mages." She looked closer at it and saw it was starting to become wooden. Glancing back at the sword proved that it was still stone, not metal like she knew them to be.

"This is the only one I can see" She confessed to the old man, looking at his face, waiting for a reaction. He nodded and leaned in to see the staff. "It's interesting that despite your skill with a sword, you've chosen a different path."

"I haven't made my choice yet." He turned his knowing smile to her. "Haven't you?" She stared at the staff for a long time, but light was quickly filtering in the cave, and before she made a choice, she woke up.

---

She came back to the cave the next night. But this time, her dream led her straight to the room, and straight to her choice. She stood from the ground near the entrance and joined the old man by the fire. She sighed and shook her head. "You're still here."

He gave a hearty chuckle and put a hand on her shoulder. "That I am".

She put her chin in her hands and looked into the fire. "This is real, this isn't just a dream is it."

"No, it isn't" She lifted her head and looked back at the objects. She looked at the pestle. "I would love to help people, but I don't believe I'll pick up a pestle anytime soon." The sword followed and she walked up, putting her hand over the hilt. "I could choose this." She let out a weary sigh and turned around, wrapping her arms around herself. "I could do great things as a warrior. I've proven myself time and again." She sank back to the ground and held her knees to her chest. "But I can't continue. I fear having to take life, I don't think I" She paused and looked at the staff. She stood back up and hovered her hand over it. "You were right." She turned back to him and smiled brightly. "I have made my choice." She took hold of the staff and felt the rough wood in her hands. Bright light shone from it, and she awoke.

-------

She sat by the fire, feeling the warmth leak into her skin. She looked for the old man, and saw him sitting, the staff laid across his legs. "I haven't seen you in about a year." She smiled at him and he returned the gesture. He stood and moved to sit beside her. He put the staff into her hands and she gripped its smooth surface, worn down by time. She smiled warmly at him and used the staff to put more light into the room, creating candles from their fire and softly illuminating the room. He smiled gently "I trust you're happy with your choice."

She nodded back at him. "Truly, I am".

"I'm overjoyed to hear that." She looked around at the candles before settling back on his face.

"Why am I back here?" She questioned him.

"Don't you enjoy my company?" He asked her. She gave a small laugh, but otherwise stayed silent, waiting. "Because I have to give you a warning. All choices have consequences, including yours. Each path came with hardships, and yours are about to rear their heads." She shut her eyes and took a deep breath.

"I'm sure I can get through them. I've faced all my challenges so far, and I'm still here. I'm too smart, and I've worked too hard to let it all go now. I refuse." She told him solidly, but he saw a flash of fear flicker in her eyes.

"Remember your conviction. Let it guide you."

----

She fell into the cave, landing on her hands and knees. She took deep breaths, somewhat disoriented, but she knew where she was. He wasn't there and she let out a shaky breath, choking back a sob. She had to ask him, she had to know. She waited, she didn't know how time passed in a dream but she hoped she still had time.

She stopped trying to fight her pain and let out a sob, another followed, and another, until she was left empty. He still wasn't there. "Forget him." She decided out loud, but her voice was rough, and she was afraid using it further would draw out more sobs, so she stayed silent for a moment, gaining control over herself. "This is my dream, this is probably my cave, I can help myself."

She waved her staff and the fire went out, the cave was instead washed with dim blue moonlight. She created a breeze that chilled her skin. This was her dream, she could sit in pity for just a moment more. She held her arms and her palms warmed the skin. "Did I ruin my life?" It started as a broken whisper. She raised her voice and asked "Did I mess up my choice?" She yelled at the rocks, at the moon, at anything that listened. "What have I done?" and broke back into sobs until the moon faded and she woke up.

---

When she came back, the blue moon was still in the cave, but the old man started a low fire, basically just embers as far as she could tell. She could only see his silhouette. "Where were you last night?" She asked in a rough voice. He gave her no answer and she sat across from him. Looking at his face through the low light the embers gave off, she could tell he was different, but she couldn't tell how. "Did I make the right choice?" She voiced her concern.

"Did you?" Came a reply colder than anything he ever said to her, and she snapped her head up to see his face, but it was in shadow. "You were already a great warrior, you could have grown into a legend."

"That wasn't what I wanted, I love magic." She kept her voice low, afraid it would break if she tried to raise it.

"If you love magic, why do you doubt it." He replied curtly and she shook her head. She felt more than saw him raise an eyebrow, silently challenging her to speak.

"I'm afraid." He scoffed. She looked at him angrily. "You told me my choice has consequences, I never imagined it would be this!" She screeched at him. "I can take my chances, I can claw my way up like I did with training! I worked so hard to build myself up, I was so sure I could do it again. After all, it was what I wanted!" Weak laughter fell from her lips. "But you didn't tell me it would touch them. I never wanted them to" She broke off and grit her teeth.

"I could've made a different choice." She lamented. "Maybe I wouldn't be here if I did." She kicked some dirt aside with her boot. "But I can get through this." She rolled her shoulders back and shook her arms, trying to bring energy back to her body. "I wouldn't have been happy if I had chosen the sword, I think we both know that."

"You can create your own happiness. Maybe you would have been happy." He looked at her and shrugged.

She pointed a finger at him. "Don't do that! I can't go back now even if I wanted to! Don't you dare tell me I would have had it easier if I made a different choice." She began to pace. "I tell myself this makes me happy, and it does." She reminded herself. "I can't tell myself I would've been happy there too, then what was the point! Do you know how much safer I was being a warrior! There was no question I would have risen up the ranks. Nothing is certain anymore now." She gripped the staff tightly, needing to be reassured of its presence, of her future there.

Tears began to build in her eyes. It was too much, she didn't want this burden. The guilt, the uncertainty ate away at her. Her doubt dragged her down, despite her heart knowing she loved it, despite her skill, she was afraid. Her anger left her empty, and heaviness happily took its place in her chest. She felt it like a weight, and she sank to the floor.

He stood, "Is your resolve, is your conviction strong enough to pull you through this? That's all you're relying on now isn't it." A smile played on the edges of his lips, but it was driven by cruelty, not kindness.

She dug the end of her staff into the ground and pulled herself back up. "My conviction is supposed to guide me." She leaned on the staff and looked towards him. "But you're right, it's not enough." His smile widened at her admission of defeat. But he missed the spark in her eye. She made the fire roar, and in the light she could clearly see his face, or the blur that should have been a face. "You aren't him. You're nothing but my doubts, indulging yourself in my pity and fear." She stood straighter and took a breath. "I listened to you because I thought you were him, I thought you were to be trusted, but I've heard enough now." She slammed the staff on the ground and the room was illuminated in brilliant light. "I will get myself through this, I will pull them through this, and I will build myself up through it." Her breath wavered, the only thing giving her away, but she held firm, not willing to back down, trusting herself not to. "And you, can go straight to where the skies abandoned." The light brightened, and she awoke.