TWENTY-NINE —— I CAN'T SAVE US

109 AC, KING'S LANDING.

There's a high ringing in Morrigan's ears as she makes her way through the halls of the Red Keep and all she can think is that she needs to get away, get away, get away—

She wants to scream. She wants to scream until her voice leaves her, but she is afraid if she opens her mouth she might never stop.

Morrigan feels sick as she rounds the corner, and for the first time in years she yearns for the bedroom she shares with her husband— if only for a sanctuary to crawl into and never come out again and she prays that she will come across none of the residents of the Red Keep that might be so inclined to have role her into a conversation. She thinks she might fall apart if they stop her from reaching that tiny lifeline in her mind.

She's only just past halfway on the endless stretch back to her chambers— not even noticing, really, but following her body like her mind is something hollow, something dead— when she feels a pressure around her wrists and then the world tips, blurs until there's darkness around her for a moment and then, soft light of a torch.

It takes her a long moment to understand that she's been pulled into one of the secret passageways of the Red Keep as she sways a little, trying to adjust to the darkness in the smaller space.

She doesn't even know where in the Red Keep she is, if she's being honest. For a moment, she tries to think back to which hallway she'd been in, but her mind comes up blank. Like someone had taken it from her memory entirely, leaving her disoriented and floating adrift without an anchor.

The thought vanishes from her mind the moment Morrigan looks up and her eyes meet Daemon's.

Something in her chest spasms, throbbing so violently, that for a moment, she is certain she will bend over, curling in on herself from the pain and throwing up. Somewhere, in the back of her mind, the thought echoes that if she peeled away her dress, she must find something bleeding and rotting all the way from her skin to inside her ribcage.

In an instant, she knows her eyes tell him everything he needs to know. Tells him that she's heard about the accusations— no matter where from so fast— she knows. Everything about them.

She stares at Daemon, and in this moment she is painfully aware that he must look as bad as she does— his shirt is wrinkled and dirty, his skin is a sickly bloodless shade, his hair is tousled in a way that speaks of a lack of energy to even bother. Morrigan is pretty sure he limps a little as he shifts to rest against the wall of the passageway.

Something in her screams at the sight of him. At the audacity of it all. He dares to look like he has crawled out of the Seven Hells— when he has just pushed her into them.

Morrigan tries to ignore the feeling of her fingertips shaking at her side, almost erratic in the uncontrolled spasms, before she begins to push her way past him, looking for the exit from the secret passage, only to find Daemon stopping her.

"Wait," he says, before he winces a little at the volume.

An almost manic laugh threatens to tear free from her throat as her eyes snap to him.

"No." Morrigan forces out and she isn't sure if her voice breaks from the agony in her chest or the ugly, churning thing in her stomach closing up her throat.

She turns to the exit once more, only for Daemon to speak up again. "Whatever they told you, it's a lie."

Morrigan stops dead in her tracks. Slowly, she turns to Daemon. "Really?" Morrigan asks slowly, her voice barely above a whisper and something in her eyes flashes as she takes a single step towards Daemon.

"Yes." Daemon replies, and for a split second Morrigan thinks that he's about to reach up and rub his temple from the headache he's clearly having— an effect of the drink he'd enjoyed in splendor only hours before, she's sure.

Her jaw ticks a little, an almost imperceptible movement. "Today I learned something. Do you want to know what?" Morrigan asks after a moment, staring at him.

Daemon, who's leaned his back against the wall, resting the back of his head against it as well for support, turns his face a little to the side to meet her gaze. "What?"

"I know what Rhaenyra looks like when she lies." Morrigan's eyes darken. "And she lied through her fucking teeth when she told us that you never touched her last night." She takes another step towards him. "So look me in my fucking eyes and try to lie to me again."

"I didn't fuck her." Daemon grinds out.

Morrigan's head tilts just a little. "Who said anything about fucking?" She asks slowly.

"I didn't—"

"Did you take her to a show at a brothel in the city?" Morrigan interrupts him, staring at him and there's something dead and savage in her eyes.

Daemon doesn't reply.

"Did you change your mind after whatever the fuck they lied about to run off to do whatever in the Seven Hells you did last night, leaving her in the middle of the brothel?"

Daemon watches her and for just a single moment, Morrigan thinks he might try to deny it again. He doesn't.

She'd known he wouldn't— deep down she'd known— the sight still wrecks something in her chest and Morrigan can almost hear it cracking apart.

She shakes her head, feeling suddenly like her body is made of stone and not bone, weighed down so much she thinks it's a miracle her legs don't give out and she sinks to the floor. For a moment, standing there, she feels so tired. "I'm a fucking idiot, aren't I?" She asks so quietly, Daemon barely hears it. A bitter sound somewhere between a laugh and a scoff escapes from her throat and she looks back up at him. "You don't care— about any of us."

"Mor—"

"You don't give a shit about anyone but yourself," Morrigan says and her voice rises a little, drowning him out. "And I was still the a stupid fool who thought you actually just might."

Her eyes are burning and suddenly, she can barely stand the sight of him, her throat closing up as she forces herself not to look away, not to relent, to back down.

She takes out the folded piece of paper he'd given her, hidden safely within a tiny nook she'd found earlier today beneath her dress, deciding it safer to carry the damning evidence around with her than leave it in her chambers where Edmyn might find it. She'd long since memorized every part of it— every line, every smudge on the parchment. She'd just not been able to bear tossing it into the flames yet to erase all signs of her plans.

"Do you know what would happen if someone found out about this?" She demands, without wanting an answer.

And maybe Daemon does know her just a little, because he doesn't give her one and only watches her in silence.

"You'd get a pat on the shoulder at best, a month out in Dragonstone at worst." She points at her chest with her index finger, nearly stabbing it as violently as she might if it were Daemon's skin. "This might get me killed if they found out."

Daemon's eyebrows draw together, just a little. Morrigan barely notices.

"What then?" She demands, voice rising. "What would happen then— when my head's on a spike? Who would protect my children from the world when you get their mother killed?"

She knows, the moment the words leave her mouth, she has made a mistake. Knows it even before she sees the small shift in Daemon's expression. Something twists in her as she watches the change. The twist, the furrow of brows, the smoothing out of them. The way something softens in his expression and then— a barely-there glance to her abdomen and she needs to force herself not to react.

Daemon straightens a little, mouth opening, but Morrigan points a finger at him. "Don't." She grits out, and only notices after a moment she almost screamed it at him. "Don't you fucking dare." She adds, choking on the words.

Morrigan lets out a bitter laugh, shaking her head and turning away. "You know— I've learned this lesson long ago, haven't I? The only ones you can trust are family." She laughs again and finds tears burning in her eyes as she looks back at him. "I was still too stupid to see it with you. I was too stupid to remember it. When I was taught it years ago— again and again, by Edmyn— by Roy—"

She breaks off suddenly and it feels like a shard of ice has been stabbed right into her chest— right where she can feel her heart stumbling, falling, freezing.

Something sharpens in Daemon's gaze. "Who the fuck is Roy?" He asks slowly, with the look of a waking predator, and Morrigan flinches at the sound of his name.

"What does it matter?" She breathes.

"It clearly does."

It takes her a moment until she can meet his eyes again. "You know, against all common sense, I never thought you would be the one to remind me of their lessons."

"Mor—"

"I said don't!" Morrigan exclaims. She points at him again and there's a wild expression in his eyes. "Don't!" The expression in her eyes becomes sharper, an edge to it that'd been dead only moments before. "I can't stand the sight of you. So go home to the Vale and your wife!"

"The Vale isn't my fucking home!"

"Then make it your home!"

"I'd sooner—"

"GET OUT OF THIS CITY!"

Daemon's voice dies at Morrigan's scream— high and erratic and desperate— and when he looks at her again he finds that now, the tears are falling. She isn't sure if it's the fury or the agony encompassing her chest wholly. Morrigan doesn't care. She barely notices.

Suddenly, there are no words left in her chest. No breath to scream with in her lungs.

Suddenly, she feels so very tired.

The silence rings in her ears as she stares at Daemon, shaking violently and she needs to force herself not to react to the tears running down her face against her permission and there's an expression in his eyes she cannot quite put her fingers on.

She leaves him in the dark before she can.

That night, instead of meeting Daemon Targaryen like a thief in the night to explore the city together, she tells Edmyn about the child.

AUTHOR'S NOTE,
✌️😭 yo. idk what it's like reading it but writing this gave me emotional damage.

this was supposed to be longer (possibly have a scene where mor overhears a part of the daemon/viserys convo in the throne room) and be up before today but since my left hand really hurts for some reason idk yet it took me longer than normal to write this word count. so, i decided to go easier on my hand and not include that scene (also, maybe i wanted mor to not know that part bcs that just made it worse and i'm way too attached to her. i'm already putting my bby through enough pain)

anyway!! a lil self-promo: i have an aemond fic up that's set in this fic-universe (called "howl") so, if you wanna check that out... pls do🤭🤭 do be mindful of the lil note at the beginning though!