Unknown

"What exactly do I want? I want no regrets and choose what I want. You would support me, right?"

Rain

"I wonder why biology needs to exist as a subject!" Sky said, pouting as he flipped through the pages of his book, irritated as hell. "It's okay. It's not that hard," Rain said. "Easy for you to say Mr. Bright and Brilliant. It's ordinary mortals like us who suffer with lowly subjects like these," Sky said, not noticing how Rain's smile fell off. "Well, let me know if you need any help revising Sky," Rain said quietly, feeling a bit hurt, but refusing to show it. "Thank you," Sky said. Suddenly his phone buzzed. His whole mood shifted as he saw the message and he left to go to the washroom. He had dared not meet Phayu, knowing that his boyfriend would immediately note how disturbed he was. Somehow, despite having met not so very long ago, it really surprised Rain how easily Phayu seemed to gauge his moods. Even Sky, whom he had known since they were in diapers, didn't get Rain the way Phayu did.

Rain splashed water on his face as he heard other students leave the restroom discussing how best to score marks. His phone buzzed again.

Appa : I have spoken to your Principal. He has assured me that he will let me know your marks as soon as you submit the paper. Better do well and don't let me down!

Rain looked at the message as if it were a snake, ready to bite him. He was so done. He did not even put the message on read, choosing to ignore it. He just needed to get through this one day, and then he would be fine. He splashed some more water on his face and then straightened. He could do this!

All the students of his class sat in the English classroom, discussing what they would do after exams were over. Rain sat still, pensive, hoping everything would work out as he wanted it to. There were a lot of things going through his head, but all of it coalesced into just one goal; ensuring that he stood up to his father. He was so done with everything. He wanted to be free. Was that too much to ask? He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he even failed to notice the speculative looks that Sky was throwing at him. Soon, the teacher walked in. "Okay everyone, put away all your books and bags. Only pencils and erasers on hand. Quickly!" he said and the students rushed to do what he had asked. Everyone quickly settled in and the teacher handed out the question papers and the answer sheets. Rain started marking the answers. Suddenly he stopped, his mind going back to all those moments with his father.

"You just got into a decent school. Could you please be more conscious of your future?

"You have to run for the Student Council, and win. No half baked tries! Better do your best! Don't let me down!"

"Did you study the English words? Did you do your homework? Can you ever do anything right? Why must you be so useless and foolish all the time?"

"How dare you talk to me about privacy? All you need to do now is study! And nothing else. That should be your sole focus! School, and then get back home!"

"Have you ever cared about me? Loved me? All you ever cared about was yourself! And your honour!"

Rain put down his pencil and sat back, clearly thinking something. Then he picked up his eraser and erased every single answer that he had marked. He looked at the paper for a few minutes, sighed, and then smiled. He got up, gave the paper to the teacher, and left the class with a spring in his step!

Phayu

This was almost the tenth time he was calling Rain in the past 15 minutes after Sky had told him that Rain had left the exam hall within 10 minutes of it starting. However good he was in English, there was no way in hell Rain could have finished that paper in just 10 minutes. Something was seriously wrong and Phayu had immediately started calling him, and looking for him at the same time. Sky and he had split, hoping to cover more area at the same time. Phayu was getting desperate. Rain had been slightly withdrawn since a couple of days, but he had assured Phayu he was okay. But he knew his boy well. Something had been eating him from the inside, and despite Phayu's asking several times, Rain had chosen to stay mum, promising him that they could talk once exams were over. Phayu had not forced him, not wanting to put further pressure on Rain, and the moment had passed. But now, Rain had apparently submitted a blank paper, something unheard of from a top student like him, and had then conveniently disappeared. Phayu was out of his mind with worry, especially since Rain was not even picking up his phone. "Where are you Rain? Why the hell are you not picking up my call?" he muttered under his breath.

Rain

Rain sat on the edge of the school field, his phone in his hand. He didn't bother to look down at it, letting it ring and then go to voicemail. He was not interested in picking up any calls or responding to the several messages that his father had already sent, each voice note increasing in anger and frustration at what Rain had done. He knew perfectly well what he had done, thank you very much, and he didn't need his father to point out his flaws once again. He had first thought of throwing his phone away, so that no one would be able to contact him, but interspersed with calls and voice messages from his father, there were also calls from Phayu, and while he knew he needed some time, Phayu was his beloved. There was no way he would stress Phayu out. He would just try to figure out what to say to him later.

"I can't believe my son turned in a blank paper!"

"Are you sick?"

"Are you avoiding me?"

"What the hell were you thinking boy?!"

"If you have a problem, you could have told me! I am your father!"

"If you don't respond, I am coming to your school right away!"

Rain shuddered at the thought of his father coming here. It was time for the next step, so he opened the camera of his phone, switched on the video mode and turned the front camera on. "Yes, I don't dare to speak to you face to face, which is why I am using this method to get my message across to you. It's true I handed in a blank paper, and yes, I did that on purpose. Let me explain why. Consider it my moment of rebellion. Every day, I come home to an empty house. You both say that you are doing everything for me, for my future, for me to have a better life. But what about the life I am living right now? Have you both thought of that?" Rain paused for a bit, trying to speak past the lump in his throat and failing miserably as tears started to flow down his eyes. "Whenever you are around, you never ask me how I am. All you want to know is if I am living up to your expectations. And I tried. I tried every day. I tried so hard to keep you both happy, keep you both satisfied. But nothing seemed to work. Nothing I said or did ever made you happy. All that happened was me letting you down. I was not even allowed to have a friend you hadn't approved of. I am so tired, so fed up of this. All of this. I began to feel like a burden on you, on myself. Many times, I decided that maybe I was not even good enough to be your son. But you know what I have realised? It's not a me problem, it's a you problem. You were strict, unapproachable, never loved me. But had you both tried, I would have given you both the world on a platter. You refused to acknowledge me as your son if I did not agree to everything you said. Well, let me just say, I refuse to acknowledge being your son. Now that it has come to this, let me see if I can find a better way to live. I am sure I will be able to survive better." By the time he hit send on the video, Rain was sobbing his heart out, but he ensured that his parents got his message. He had just switched off his phone when he felt arms going around him. He knew those arms, and he leaned fully into them, sobbing even more, letting Phayu take the weight of his sorrows.

3rd person

"Rain just sent me this video," Rain's father said, giving his wife his phone, as they both sat together in the aftermath of Rain's actions. As she watched, Rain's mom gasped at how Rain was crying. "Did we do something wrong Ter?" she asked, her own eyes filling with tears. "I don't understand. All that I ever wanted was that he should not go down a wrong path. Was that too much to ask? What did I ever do wrong?" he asked. "Maybe.. maybe we did push him too hard? What if.. what if we let him figure out things on his own?" she said. "Is he even old enough for that? I mean, we can decide what is best for him," his father said. "And that seems to have backfired spectacularly Ter. So maybe it's time we just leave it to him," she said. "But he has all our resources in hand," his father said. "Exactly. Our resources. We did not have such a great beginning. We had to struggle for everything, so we thought we will push it on to him to do better. But all our successes are worthless Ter, if we push our failures on our son. Let his do what he wants. Let us give him the space. Let's just be listeners from now on," she said, putting her hand on her husband's arm, knowing that it would be a struggle, but they might have to change for their son if they wanted him with them in the first place.

Rain

Rain walked down with his club members, discussing all the practice they needed to do post lunch, for their big performance happening the next day. He was relaxed. The events post the exam had made it clear that his parents would let him choose his own path, and he had already decided what he wanted to do. A long ago conversation with Phayu, when he had been filling his form for the student council, had remained in his head. At that time, he had thought that Phayu was feeling bad about being his competitor in the race for being the President of the Council, but later, he had realised that Phayu had just not wanted to go far away from him. So he had been doing his own research, and he had some very important news to give to his beloved after this club performance would get over. It was not exactly the path his parents had chosen for him, but Rain was okay with that. He would follow his passions, and his Phayu, and that was more than enough for him.

Suddenly his phone rang, and the news from the other side was shocking. "All five of them ate something bad, and now they all have food poisoning!" he said. The rest of the club members were shocked! "What do we do?" Arthit, the person who played the cello, asked, looking worried. "I can ask a friend of mine. He has a band. Maybe he can help us out as he may know people," Rain said, immediately thinking of Phayu. The others nodded gratefully. "That would be awesome," Amy, their violinist, said. Rain immediately dialled Phayu's number.

Phayu

Phayu parked his scooter in front of his Mae's stall, removed his helmet and took his phone out. "Eighteen calls? Why is he looking for me so urgently?" he smiled, as he immediately called Rain back. "You okay love?" he asked, blushing at the endearment that slipped out, hoping Rain would not notice. "Okay, okay, slow down. Take a breath and tell me again," he said, when Rain babbled off something. "Oh! Food poisoning? Ah! I see. Give me 10 minutes. I will call Pai and then get back to you?" he said, as Rain finally quieted down. He smiled and shook his head before calling Pai. "Hey bro! Rain's club had a performance tomorrow, but some of the members are in hospital due to diarrhea and vomiting caused by food poisoning. Is there any way we can help them out?" he asked. Pai must have said something, because Phayu laughed. "I am sure Rain will agree," he said, before calling Rain back.

"What are you looking for young man?" Phayu's mom asked him, as she saw him stick his head into his father's old music collection. "Rain's club had a performance tomorrow, but some members are sick. So we are going to perform with them. I am looking for a good song to sing along with," Phayu said, not even looking up from his perusal, until his mom screeched! "Ow! What was that for?" he asked staring at her in shock. "Oh my God! I have to go find a nice dress to wear," she said, turning around from where she was leaving. "Mae, it's not like that. I will send you the link for it. It's a closed door event only for school and board members," Phayu said, laughing at his mom's antics! Oh, how he loved this woman! "Well, okay then. So, what kind of song are you looking for?" she asked. "Something to do with love, obviously," Phayu said distractedly, diving back into his father's collection. "Because it is for Rain?" she asked. "Hmm," he hummed and then sharply looked up again.

"You like him no?" she asked, a small smile on her face. "You could tell?" he asked, blushing a bit. "You are 'oh, so easy to read' baby," she said. Phayu could feel himself blushing more. "I love him Mae. And what is strange is that he loves me back," Phayu said, wonder lacing his tone. The he stared at his mom. "I didn't mean to say that. It just.. slipped out," he said, wanting to just hide his face so no one could see him. Instead he went back to rifling through the CDs again. "Yu, are you sure about this?" his mother asked, pulling his attention once again. "Sure about what?" he asked absently. "About being with Rain? You know our country. Acceptance will not be easy. From whatever you have told me of his life at his home, he is not in a good place. Over and above that, you are planning to go abroad for your studies. It's a dream you have seen all your life. Are you willing to give that up? Or are you sure he will wait for you?" she asked, not wanting to hurt her son, but these were questions that had been worrying her for long.

"I don't know Mae, but I will figure it out I guess," Phayu said, looking pensive. Then he shook his head. "No time for this Mae. I need to find a song as soon as possible. What will I sing tomorrow? I can't let Rain and the others down," he said, looking a bit frustrated now. "You are looking for one of your dad's songs?" she asked. "His songs are all good, so I don't know which one to pick," he said. "Then pick the song that speaks the most to you. The you right now. The one song that makes you feel alive, makes all your emotions feel alive," she said. He stared at her for a couple of minutes, then reached forward and hugged her. "Thanks Mae. You are the best!" he said, giving her a kiss on the cheek before he picked up one of the discs lying right at the bottom and rushing out. He needed to give his band the music beforehand, so that they could practice.

3rd Person

"I didn't expect you guys to be able to pull this off in just one night," the current Student Council President, P'Ren said. The new Student Council President would be announced after this performance, and Rain was very excited for Phayu. He had withdrawn, not being at all interested in this post, and was hoping that Phayu would get it so that he would be able to fulfil his dreams. "Well, thankfully our friends helped us out," Sky said, as Rain smiled. Just then, Phayu came running. "Thirty minutes more for backstage prep," he said. "Then why don't you guys go and do any last minute preparations you need to?" P'Pam, another member of the Student Council, said. Rain, Sky and Phayu looked at each other and nodded. "Okay, sounds good," Rain said. "Are you guys confident?" P'Ren asked. All of then nodded. "Of course we are!" Rain said, pumping his fist in the air, as Sky put his hand on his shoulder and Phayu looked on indulgently. "Okay! Good luck then! Su su!" P'Ren and P'Pam said, as the younger boys made their way out.

"Ter, Rain's performance is about to start. Don't you want to watch it? I am really keen on knowing how he does, and that new friend of his. I wonder how he will do," Rain's mom said. Although his father was keen too, he pretended to be disinterested, but he kept his ears open, wanting to know more and more about his son. Rain's mom smiled to herself. Whatever he would say or do, Rain's father did love him. Yes, they had been unable to show it to him, because it had been buried under too many demands they had put on him. But they had come too close to losing Rain to ever stand in his way ever again. On the other side of town, Phayu's mom was also reminded that it was her son's performance when she too received the link. Since she was not at home, she stood in the shade of a bus-stop, and connected to the link, excited about how her son would do.

The band began performing. When Phayu began to sing, both students and teachers, as well as the board of directors, were mesmerised. They had not realised such talent lay among them. The students had some inkling, thanks to a teacher releasing the footage of one of Phayu's songs, but to see him like this, live, it was amazing. His voice flowed over them like silk, the words creeping into their hearts. But Phayu had eyes only for Rain. He knew that he had picked this song for the sole reason because he wanted to sing it to Rain; the Rain who had held an umbrella over his head, the Rain who had looked at him with tear drenched eyes at a kindness shown, the Rain who had made his way into his heart and soul without any effort, the Rain for whom he would turn the world upside down. It was clearly a confession of the perfect love that he felt for the boy who was his everything.

Rain and Phayu

Rain and Phayu lay on the roof of the school, as Rain loudly belted out the song Phayu had just sung, and Phayu quietly laughed watching him. Phayu had become the Student Council President, which meant that his scholarship to Berklee School of Music, Massachusetts, was confirmed. And no one had been more thrilled than Rain. It was as if he was the one who had achieved all of this. Phayu suddenly sat up, and Rain looked at him expectantly. "Are you seriously that happy?" Phayu asked. "I am! I am ecstatic!" Rain said. "Seriously? You are okay with me going so far away Rain?" Phayu asked, his heart breaking. Yes, it had been his dream to go abroad and study, that too on full board and scholarship. But if that meant leaving Rain, he had thought of reconsidering the decision. But here was Rain, who was almost giddy with delight at the thought of Phayu leaving.

"Wasn't it your one single dream?" Rain asked, as he stared at Phayu, his smile falling a bit. "Oh my God Phayu! Hope you are not thinking of changing your mind for any reason!" he added. "What if I said I was?" Phayu asked. "What? What? Why?" Rain was nearly panicking. "Rain, if I leave, do you know what that means for us?" Phayu asked, his heart hurting. Rain stared at him for a few seconds and then the biggest smile burst out on his face. He cupped Phayu's cheeks. "My silly beloved! Did you really think that I would let you leave me?" he asked, as Phayu stared at him in concentration. "What do you mean?" he asked, shocked at being called beloved by Rain. "I have applied for a BS, that is, a Bachelor of Science, in Clinical Psychology at Tufts, in Boston. I will be going with you Phayu. You are never going to be alone, and neither am I," Rain said, as Phayu stared at him, overwhelmed. "And you got in?" he whispered, his voice choked. "Just one last interview babe, and we can fly out together as soon as we are ready," Rain said, pulling Phayu's cheeks.

Phayu just couldn't help it. In his wildest dreams, he had not imagined that Rain would take such a big step for him. He cupped Rain's face and pulled him closer, pecking his lips. They stared at each other as they drew back, and then they both dived right back in. It began as a soft moulding of lips on lips, but when Rain sighed, Phayu slipped his tongue in, capturing the sigh and the moan that went with it. They drew back when they both needed the air, and Phayu kept his forehead on Rain's. "That was my first kiss," he said, sounding a bit sheepish. "Mine too," Rain said, sounding as if he had just run a marathon. "My first kiss was with you," Phayu said, staring at Rain and trying to stop himself from kissing him again. "My last will be with you too. I want to be your faith my beloved," Rain said, before coming closer and kissing Phayu again. This time, both their tongues came to play and when they drew back, they were both flushed with happiness.

Epilogue, six years later

"Could you please stop all this jumping around? We are at the airport!" Pai said, as he tried to control Sky. "They have been gone six years! Six fucking years! It was supposed to be just four! All because Phayu got a chance to do his Masters. So Rain also stayed back with him. Hmpf!" Sky said, rolling his eyes, as if it was all Phayu's fault. Pai shook his head at his boyfriend. Phayu and Rain had really done what they had set out to do. Phayu had gotten a scholarship to Berklee, and not very surprisingly, Rain had gotten his own scholarship. They had come out to Rain's parents before they left, but with two such outstanding children in front of them, no one had been able to refuse. After the four years had been up, Phayu had gotten another scholarship to do his Master in Music Composition from Juilliard, and the two had moved to New York, where Rain had joined Columbia for his Masters in Clinical Psychology as well. He had gotten done in one year, but he had obviously waited for Phayu to get done. Finally, the two were coming back, and Sky was over the moon, waiting for his best friend to come back.

"Sky! There they are!" Pai pointed out. Sky whirled around immediately. Phayu and Rain walked towards them. Phayu was dressed in black slacks, black shirt open at the neck, a thin silver chain with a black stone hanging on his chiselled abs, long hair pulled back in a bun, and pierced ears, sunglasses perched on his head. Rain was dressed somewhat similarly, except his pants were white, with a pale blue shirt, half tucked in, half out. He too had longer hair, but he had gone ash blonde, making him look soft and fragile in front of Phayu. He also wore a chain and his sunglasses were on his head too. "Phayu looks like Mafia, and Rain looks tiny in front of him," Sky giggled. "They look like a power couple to me," Pai said, looked almost shocked at their transformation. "I agree," Sky said.

He couldn't believe how far the two of them had come. He rushed forward to hug Rain and the two friends jumped on each other in happiness, as Pai and Phayu also hugged and then looked on indulgently at the boyfriends. "We have a lot to catch up on, but first, we need to go home," Rain said, pulling his sunglasses off. "Wait, wait! What the fuck?! What is this?" Sky asked, snatching up Rain's left hand where a ring glinted. "And you too!?" It was Pai's turn to snatch up Phayu's hand. "You guys got ENGAGED?" Sky shouted, much to the chagrin of the other three, who looked around the airport bowing to show their apologies. "Sky!" Rain hissed, totally embarrassed. "And no, we are not engaged. We are married. We got married in New York," Phayu said, smiling broadly at his husband. "What?" Pai asked, looking dumbfounded. "And your families? Rain's parents? Your mom?" "Well, that's why we said we need to go home first. Both of us want to break the news to them and well, you know?" Rain said. "Will they be okay with it?" Sky asked. "His mom will surely be. I don't know about my parents. But considering the fact that Phayu is going to be working with some big production houses and I have a job in the Psychology department of Bangkok Hospital, they might give us some leeway," Rain said. "Plus, our marriage is completely legal too," Phayu said.

"Rain! Phayu!" The two looked up and were startled to see their parents rush towards them. "Mae?" Phayu asked, sounding surprised. "Appa? Mom?" Rain sounded even more incredulous. "How did you know we were arriving today?" Phayu asked, and Rain immediately looked at Pai and Sky, who looked extremely sheepish. "Umm.. we told them?" Sky said. "To our credit, we didn't know you got married!" Pai said, and all the parents stopped short! "Married?" Rain's father's voice came out completely strangled while Sky bopped Pai on the head. Phayu and Rain sighed. Well, the cat was fully and completely out of the bag now. They looked at each other and then pushed their left hands together in tandem. "Married," Rain confirmed, hoping to all the Gods that his father wouldn't throw a tantrum in the middle of the airport.

"The rings are beautiful!" both the moms cooed in happiness. "Getting married in a foreign country and all is fine, but you have to register your marriage in Thailand. Only then will we accept it," Rain's father said, trying to look stern, but failing miserably when his son jumped into his arms, crying. "Thank you Appa! Thank you Mom! Thank you so much!" he said, as he pulled his mom into the hug too. "Well, Phayu, what are you looking at lu? Join us!" Rain's father said, holding his arm out for his son in-law. How could he ever say no to Phayu, the boy who had changed his son's life around, and made him a completely different person. Whom they had thought of as someone upto no good, a troublemaker, was not only a competent composer who was already working with big teams, he was also someone who had given their son a path to follow. And now, they were both home, and their family would finally be complete. There was not a single dry eye in the group as everyone hugged each other, finding their faith and happiness in each other!