I was on the path of achieving my goals, my plan was excellent, above excellent.  Then I met her. I knew I'll get fucked up by time, so  I continued to go through my plans for a few more months but eventually I gave up. So from idk where I ran away to another place and consentante on my plans.  But then after a long while I came back and get to be closer & closer to her. My thoughts were exhausted from creating scenes in which I was around her. With her being my dominant thought, every other plan and goal faded away slowly, and she became my ultimate & primary goal. Every word was a treasure from her. But the irony is that now she was completely ignoring me, calling me things I'm not, mocking my skills and to make the matter worser. I even asked for undirect simpathese from someone. That's not me I can't believe I did a pointless thing like that.

Emotions are toxic to achieve well established plans. But really, I should take some actions instead of comtemplating in my room for days. Thoughts with no action is as good as nothing. At the end of the day, I end up with nothing but with my imagined heartbroken self. It does not make any sense that I should feel played around, yet I am. And to worst it more life is dragging me to get more anxious day by day. Heh lucky me, can't my life get worser? Yep it can!