hello if u like my books (lol why am i asking this on still into him, i should have asked in space academy lmaoo) please go to my profile and read my latest thing on the message board and help me choose what kind of book to write next ! would be cool <333 ik some of u already did, i love u hihi

***

"I wish we could spend christmas alone, just us two", Jungkook whispered, staring up at the ceiling as he was laying next to Taehyung in bed. It felt right to lay here, with him, again. They didn't do that ever since they broke up last year. Jungkook had spent all those lonely nights in here, looking at the fairylights they had brought up together back then, and wished for Taehyung to be here again.
Maybe that's why he treasured this moment even more right now, just being next to each other while holding hands. It didn't need more than this, no touching or kissing-, just Taehyung's presence was enough. Only now, after so long, he realized how much he had craved for this feeling of peace within himself. All the time while being with Jimin it felt nice, it was fun, but it wasn't Taehyung.

"Where would you want to go?", Taehyung asked curiously, turning around so he could fully face Jungkook. He admired the boy's beautiful features, his prettily shaped lips that looked so plump and kissable at all times, glossed at all times because Jungkook would never be without his lipbalm.
"Anywhere", Jungkook smiled, "Maybe the mountains, it's pretty there."

Taehyung's smile widened, "The mountains?", he asked, "Imagine having a christmas tree in an old cabin, just you and me and no one else for at least 5 miles in each direction. Surrounded by the mountains and snow~"

"Promise me, one day, we will do exactly this", Jungkook hummed, still looking up at the ceiling. "Sometimes I wonder if I even need anything else than you. You know, to be happy-"

"It's dangerous to think that way", Taehyung said, "Your happiness shouldn't rely on me, Kookie."

The younger nodded, "I know that, it's just so good to have you back. I didn't even realize how lonely life is when it's not spent with you."
Taehyung giggled softly, "Luckily you won't ever have to be without me again."

Kook's heart fluttered at this, "Promise me that."
"I promise. I learned my lesson", Taehyung mumbled.

"I promise to never push you away again", Jungkook then said, slowly but with a really serious tone swinging along. "I've been so overwhelmed back then, with my parents and everything, I felt like pushing away everything that reminded me of love. I should have talked to you instead."

"No it's okay", Taehyung shrugged, squeezing Jungkook's hand a little, "Look, this is life. Life will always be a mess, and we're just human. Doing mistakes comes along with being human, it's what makes us grow, baby. I understand why you pushed me away, I pushed you away countless of times before, don't you remember? I didn't have to run to Lia as well after we got in a fight, but I did, and I know I shouldn't have but neither of us can change that it happened. So let's move on from the past and focus on making a better future. Let's make sure you and me will never end up like your parents", he hummed, "I never want to find you in your office, making out with another man just because I'm not enough."

"I still can't believe my Dad did that", Jungkook shook his head, "I thought he loves my Mom. They were so perfect together."

"Well sometimes the things that seem most perfect, are really not." Taehyung bit his lips, "My parents seem great too, from the outside. Well, behind the scenes they beat me and Jimin up."
Jungkook gulped, "You two deserved so much better."

"And we got better", Taehyung smiled, "Thanks to you, baby~"

"Is that why you and me work so well together?", Jungkook suddenly asked, "Because we're everything but perfect? We're always a mess but it still feels absolutely right."
"Maybe that is why", Taehyung laughed, "Maybe we should appreciate the mess we made."

Jungkook smirked, his grin seeming a little dirty, just like his thoughts were this very moment. "You should make a mess out of me", Jungkook teased, "Bet that feels perfect too."

"You're unbelievable", Taehyung laughed out, slowly pushing himself up and leaned over Jungkook's smaller body, "How can you go from a serious conversation, full of emotion and depth, to thinking about getting fucked up by me?"

"The way my mind works is amazing", Jungkook hummed, wrapping his arms around Taehyung's body so he could pull him on top of him. "You turn me on when you're being all serious and grown up."

"Well", Taehyung chuckled, "I'm turning 22 in two weeks, babe. I should get wiser, shouldn't I?"

"A whole man", Jungkook let out, pouting his lips to show his craving for a kiss, "Can't wait till I'll make you my man~"
"I already am your man!", Taehyung said sternly, "I'm taken by you, all yours, just yours, Koo."

"I meant marriage", Jungkook laughed.

"I know you did", Taehyung rolled his eyes, "You should still call me your man already."

"Why is that?", Jungkook kept teasing, pulling the blanket above them as he felt how Taehyung pressed their lower bodies together, obviously getting turned on by this whole thing as well.
"It sounds nice", the older admitted shyly, blushing a little, "I like being yours."

"You sound so subby when you say that", Jungkook giggled, "Just so you know, I'm supposed to be the whiny sub here."

"Oh come on", Taehyung laughed, "As if you have ever been subby. Remember when it all started and you grabbed my cock in my car when Lia and Jimin went inside a store to get snacks for movie night? Or how you walked into my room when I was fucking a girl? And you did never, not once, got embarrassed?"

Jungkook laughed, "That's confidence, Sir."

"That's not being a sub, Mister", Taehyung teased. "But no worries, if I can promise you one more thing then that would be, that I will never ever let you put your dick up my ass."

Jungkook looked a bit offended, "Why? You like my dick though."

"I love your dick", Taehyung gulped, "I'm just afraid of getting it up my ass."

"Tops are so exhausting", Jungkook giggled playfully, "Afraid of a little pain~, unbelievable. Well, you're missing out. Not me. So, haha."
Taehyung shrugged, "It's fine I can live with that loss", he winked and then pressed a tiny kiss on Jungkook's lips, biting his lower lip immediately after as he started unzipping Jungkook's pants. "I can live with that too", Jungkook whispered, eyes falling shut as he felt Taehyung's tongue suddenly entering his mouth, kissing him passionately-

*

Jimin had enough.

He got up from the sofa after watching a whole movie and finished his pizza. The boy grabbed his phone and his jacket and headed out of the house, walking along the street. He was headed for the beach. Yeah, it was winter, but they had a clubhouse there in which the younger people enjoyed their nights in winter. There was always a good amount of alcohol, tons of people and music that could be tolerated.
It felt weird, being back here, after being off to college for some months. Even though it was still his hometown, it felt odd to walk around here, seeing the same people he used to see everyday.
Everything seemed different but it was really not, no one changed except for himself.

The boy entered the clubhouse and got greeted by the smell of vodka and beer, the bar being right at the entrance.
"Yo, Jimin!", he heard a well known voice from the side.

Yoongi.

"Hi", he turned around and stared at Yoongi who he hadn't seen in ages. The boy had his hair dyed blonde and was sipping on a beer, holding Aylie by her waist.
"Oh and- Aylie", Jimin gulped. Didn't they break up? He could remember pretty well how Aylie and Tzuyu started to have a thing going on.

"Long time no see", Yoongi smiled and pulled Jimin closer, handing him a beer. "How's life?"

Jimin was still dumbfounded. He felt like being in highschool all over again. The same couple in front of him, yet no love between them. As if nothing had changed. "You two are back together?", he asked instead of answering Yoongi's question.
"Kinda", Aylie shrugged, "It just worked out for us."

"Ya it always does, doesn't it", Jimin hummed, feeling a little disappointed. Not because of them necessarily, but because it always worked out for everyone. Except for him. "Have you seen Hoseok anywhere?", he then asked shyly, looking for the one boy he was still longing to see.

Yoongi shrugged, "Over there somewhere", he said, "But he seemed busy-"

Jimin smiled weakly, "Alright, let's catch up later, I'll be right back", he said and then walked off, looking for Hoseok. There was a bunch of people he knew from highschool, dancing around in the middle, then there were the football kids that sat in a corner and played some dumb ass drinking game. Hoseok should be there somewhere, he used to be in that team as well. Along with Taehyung-, yeah and even Jungkook, back when his father forced him to play football.
"Has anyone seen Hoseok?", he asked when he joined the group. The boys gave him only confused looks, "Nah, he's been outside for quite a while now-"
"Outside?", Jimin asked, heading for the door. It was freezing outside, why would Hoseok go outside-

Well, he got his answer as soon as he walked out of the back entrance and saw Hoseok sitting on a stone while smoking weed.
Jimin breathed out relieved, for a second he really thought Hoseok would be out here to make out with someone. But it really was just him and his drugs, the good old Hoseok as he used to be in highschool.

"Hey", Jimin said and sat down next to him. Hoseok looked at him for a second and then moved to the side to give Jimin some space to sit. "Want some?", he asked, offering him to smoke as well. Jimin shook his head, "Nah. I'm good."

"I missed you", he said after Hoseok didn't respond for a while.

"Well did you?", Hoseok hummed, not even giving him another glance. Jimin nodded shyly, "I did."

"You shouldn't have dumped me for Jungkook then", he said sharply. Now it clicked in Jimin's head, he finally got why Hoseok would never reply to his messages nor look him in the eye while talking.
"I didn't think you'd mind", Jimin let out, "We were on and off all the time, I thought you just wanted to fuck around."

"Oh fuck off", Hoseok snapped, "I loved you."

"You should've told me that", Jimin looked down, "It could have avoided all this mess."

"You always had your eyes on Jungkook anyway", Hoseok grumbled, "It's always that damn kid. For everyone. Taehyung dumped his friends to be with that kid, you dumped me to fuck him, it's always Jungkook, Jungkook, Jungkook. For everyone."

"He's really not that great", Jimin said, tears filling his eyes, "He dumped me without even feeling bad for it."

"And are you surprised?", Hoseok laughed out, "Jungkook is such a toxic person. He draws everyone in when all he cares about is Taehyung anyway, he's always been like that. And you fell for it. Those two should just be left alone. They ruin all of us", Hoseok kept on ranting, "They ruined Lia, look at the girl, she will never start loving herself because she's so used to being Taehyung's toy. They ruined you, look at you, you don't smile the same anymore. They ruined me, look at me, I'm addicted to weed just because it makes me less angry."

"They're not that bad", Jimin tried to defend his brother and his used to be best friend. "They've been through a lot."

"We all have!", Hoseok snapped and then got up from the stone. "Why did you come out here?"

"To talk to you, to see you", Jimin said helplessly, "I'm lonely-"

"Well, sucks to be you then", Hoseok said harshly, "Get out of my way. I'm going inside now."

"Why are you like this?", Jimin asked, tears now leaving his eyes. "What's wrong with you?"
Hoseok shook his head in disbelief, laughing out weakly.
"What's wrong with me? What's wrong is that you only come to me when you feel lonely. As you always do. I'm not your toy, I'm not your Lia. And you're not my Taehyung. Go and treat someone else like that."

With that he walked back in and shut the door behind him, leaving Jimin standing there.
And then it just got over him and he found himself crying still twenty minutes later. Snow was falling, his body went limp in the icy wind but he simply let it all out.

"You okay?", a girl asked when she came outside after a while.

Jimin looked up, wiping his tears away as he recognized her.
Lia.
"What are you doing here?", he asked her quietly, trying to calm himself down from crying.

"I saw you leave earlier and only Hoseok came back, so-", she shrugged, "Just wanted to check up on you."

"You paid attention?", he asked her with big eyes. She shrugged, "Had nothing else to do", she admitted, blushing a little. "Thought you might need someone to talk to. I know I'm not as good as Hoseok or Kook or Tae or anyone to talk to but, well.. I'm here."

"Yeah, you're here", Jimin whispered, looking at her for a long, long time. "Here. When everyone else isn't."

She smiled awkwardly.

***