submitted by kakophony

Jasper: *eats a cheeto puff*

Peridot: CANNIBALISM

-

Lapis: Would you like a glass of water, Peridot?
Because I have a tall glass of water right here.

Peridot: You're too salty to drink, Lapis.

Jasper, rising out of Earth's crust: OOOOOHHHH ROASTED