You knew something was wrong the moment Tony walked into the room. It wasn't that he greeted you instantly with words that made your heart sink with fear. In fact, it was his unusual silence that acknowledged you first, and that only made the anxiety in your chest rise to new heights. For your brother was certainly not the silent type, he always had a quick quip for any situation and you never knew him to be at a loss for words. And yet, here he was walking towards you with an ominous silence in his shadow.

"Tony?"

Your voice trembled slightly, as your hands rung together nervously in front of you. And as your words seemed to echo in the large and window encompassed room, his deep brown eyes lifted to meet your heavy gaze. And if the unlikely silence wasn't enough to tell you that something about the mission had gone wrong, his face certainly filled in any of the remaining blanks. 

You had never known your brother to show any sign of shock or let others see that something affected him in a deep way. Even with Pepper, he struggled to be real and honest with her, when it came to the things he experienced. But even if he tried his hardest, he couldn't mask the pain that washed across his face. It was a pain that you instantly recognized, for you held the same hurt in your heart. The loss; seeping its way into the lines of his slightly tanned face. A loss from so long ago, and yet still fresh as though the accident had just occurred. 

"Tony?" You asked again, as your brother paused his steps just as he reached you. "where's Steve?"

Your question caused his head to jerk up, and you saw the flare of fire reflecting back in his eyes. His deep set brows furrowing as Steve Roger's name fell from your lips, and you watched his hand dig for a short second in his back pocket. Pulling out a flat white envelope that he held out for you to take, the hand that held it tensed and nearly crushed the paper beneath his grip. But he loosened just enough that you could slip it out of his tight fist, and you looked down at the familiar writing on the front of the envelope. 

"Ask your precious soldier." He murmured under his breath, before he turned and walked right out of the room. Hurried as though a fire burned beneath him, and although you could hear the anger and betrayal in his voice, you knew none of it was aimed at you. 

The envelope was small and thin, and yet it felt as though it weighed your entire body down as you held it delicately in your hands. Like the ink was made of lead. 

Running your fingertip softly over the simple writing of your name on the front, you walk to the chair sitting lonely in the corner of the wide and slightly cold room. Your legs tucked beneath you as your fingers moved slowly to peel open the flap in the back. Hearing the paper rip faintly, and you pulled out three thin sheets of paper. They were creased together in order to fit them both in the snug envelope, but even before you open them up, you knew that the paper you held was a letter. And you braced yourself for what kind of news awaited you in the form of Steve's handwritten words. 

You could almost hear his voice as your eyes ran over your name, that was printed neatly in his unmistakable handwriting. It was as though he stood beside you in the room, calling your name softly in the silence that settled in the air. And it made your heart ache when your head naively raised, and spotted nothing but vacant space surrounding you.

Maybe Tony's already told you everything. I know how he hates keeping secrets from you. Maybe he's said everything there is for you to know, and you've changed your mind about me. I wouldn't blame you... it isn't fair of me to make you choose between me and your brother. 

But if he hasn't, I wanted you to hear it from me. 

Your parents, their death is on Bucky's hands, and although he wasn't in his right mind when he did what he did, he's still responsible for the reason they aren't there with you today.

The thin paper fluttered from your fingers, falling to your lap as all the strength inside of you was suddenly drained. Your chest constricted with a pain that made you fear you were suffocating from the inside out, but the tears that burned the corners of your eyes like acid, told you that you were still alive. 

But the words, they echoed inside your head with a volume that rattled your bones. Bucky had murdered your parents. It wasn't some freak accident on their way to the airport, or rather the pentagon as Tony believed. It was a planned attack, and the realization twisted your stomach into a knot so tight you felt winded. 

The images swirled in your head like a nightmare you couldn't awaken from, the thought of your mother being executed in cold blood caused a sob to escape you. And you realized now, why the pain on Tony's face looked so familiar and fresh. Why his anger spiked at the mention of Steve. He found out the truth about your parents, and Steve took Bucky's side. It was the only explanation for the betrayal in his eyes and the reason Steve was writing you instead of telling you in person. 

As the tears burned a trail down your face, you looked downward towards your lap. Staring blankly at the unfolded letters sitting in wait for you to continue reading. And although the truth nearly made you get sick all over Tony's high priced furniture, you picked the letter up. Because you could hear Steve's voice in each word you read, and there was a comfort in the sound of his voice. No matter what it was he was telling you.

I should've told you the instant I knew the truth, but I thought I could spare you the pain if I didn't. I thought in some way, by not telling you the things I knew about the death of your parents, that I could take on the burden and leave you to live your life without that sorrow. I thought I was doing the right thing keeping it to myself, but I realize now, that in keeping this secret from you, that I've evidently hurt you worse than if I had told you the moment I found out the truth. I held this from you in order to spare myself the pain of seeing your face when you found out. 

And for that... I'm sorry. More sorry than you'll ever know. And my one wish, is that one day you'll be able to forgive me. That you both will. 

Sobs escaped you as tears flooded your vision, and cupping your mouth with the palm of your hand, you tried to conceal the deep anguished cries that echoed in the vast room. Squeezing your eyes shut, you cried for your parents. Your father that wasn't present much in your childhood, and yet you still thought of nearly everyday. And your mother, the heartbeat of the family that left a hole in both yours and Tony's lives. But as you continued to sob softly, you cried for Steve. You weren't sure if your cries were of anger and betrayal like the anger that flowed through your brother's veins at the moment, or if you cried because all you wanted was to rush into his arms. To feel his warm breath on your neck and hear him whisper in your ear that everything was going to be alright. 

I'm glad you're there at the compound with him, he shouldn't be alone. Neither one of you should be. It's best if you're together, especially now. Everyone needs family, and right now Tony needs you like you need him. I never wanted to fill that space in your life and I never tried to. Everyone needs a brother, and even as we don't always see eye to eye, I know how much he cares for you. And that he'll go to the ends of the earth to protect his little sister. 

Take care of him for me. We both know he needs you more than he let's on.

You knew you should be furious or burdened with hurt by the truth that you now knew, and yet as you heard his voice as you continued to read, his words were like a cooling balm to your raw wounds. His selflessness and compassion, his sincerity and his own anguish at what had to happen, it broke your heart and yet sealed it back up all within a matter of minutes. 

I know that I've hurt you. I know that this letter isn't even close to the closure you deserve. And I know that the moment you see me again, that you'll want to curse me out and throw your best punch my way. And I'll take it. Because that's what I deserve for leaving you in a time like this. But it's Tony you need right now, and I want to give you both the time to mourn together as you should. And maybe one day, with time, you'll both understand where it is that I stand.

But I want you to know, if you need me...I'll be there. 

That's my promise to you. 

I love you.

Steve.

A/N: This was another idea I had been wanting to write for a while. I got it after I rewatched Civil War (of course) and I just had to see where I could go with it! I loved hearing Steve read the letter in the movie, and I wanted to have that same feel in this one shot. The words just as sincere as he is, as though you can hear his voice saying them out loud, even when he isn't around. I hope you all liked it! ❤