▬▬▬ CHAPTER TWO ▬▬▬

I hoped you guys enjoyed the dating headcanons I posted in the Church of Essie. Writing Étienne and Regulus' parts were especially fun for me 😂

Anyways, I liked REWVIE's (previously known as LARVVIE) idea for a trio name, soooo...

Let me introduce you all to!!!

THE ROMAN PLASTICS!

If I ever made a Mean Girls AU, Essie would totally be Karen 😫 I can see that dumb bitch trying to predict the weather with her boobs like:

Ethan: wtf are you doing

Essie: trying to predict the weather with my boobs, duh

Ethan:

Ethan: lemme help you out—

THE THREE OF THEM HAD barely started their journey to find Camp Jupiter and Percy was already aware of three things:

One, he was the unfortunate third wheel in their little trio. The forgotten fly on the wall. Ethan would flirt and seduce his poor flustered girlfriend as if Percy wasn't five feet away from them. It wasn't too much of a shock since he would see how he behaved around her during their time at the Wolf House, but... but now Ethan looked close to snapping.

The older guy was absolutely shameless. So shameless that he went from being the most terrifying person Percy had ever met, to... a desperate, depraved mess. He could tell the guy was itching to find the nearest hotel to stay over at.

(Poor, poor Esmerelda.)

Now moving on to the second thing he learned: they smelled. Like food apparently, which he didn't know whether to take as a compliment or not. They had only made it about three or so miles away from the Wolf House and they had already been bombarded with at least twenty or so monsters. Every time they managed to kill them, Ethan would give him an evil look as if the monster appearances were his fault. What the fuck, man?

And third: Esmerelda was a wanted fugitive. Somehow. It made no sense to Percy why she was the international threat when Ethan was literally right there. He couldn't imagine her being a criminal. The worst 'crime' he could see her doing was breaking into an animal shelter to cuddle with all the adorable puppies. Ethan, though? He could imagine him being wanted for all kinds of fucked up shit. Dude was a menace.

"What the heck did you even do?" Percy wondered aloud as they hid behind a bush just in time as a bunch of cop cars sped past them.

Beside him, Esmerelda grimaced. "Um, well, they think I'm part of the mafia."

He stared at her.

Her face flushed in embarrassment. "It was a huge misunderstanding, I swear!"

He turned to Ethan. "And you?"

"I'm a law-abiding citizen," he said smugly.

Esmerelda sniffed daintily, smelling the bullshit from where she sat. "Just you wait. The Mist is going to screw you over too."

Speaking of the Mist, Percy had a pretty good feeling he and the Mist didn't get along. He didn't really know why, maybe it had something to do with his past. He wouldn't be surprised if the Mist made people think he was a wanted fugitive or worse, a terrorist.

"Alright, we should think of a plan," Percy started once they were sure all the cops were gone. They were hiding out inside an abandoned winery now and it took all of his strength not to drink any of the old wine the owners left behind.

For some odd reason, an amused look crawled over Esmerelda's face when he said the word 'plan'. He didn't really get it, but he ignored it and continued on, "We can all agree that we need to head somewhere south, right?"

Lupa had trained them on how to use their homing radar in order to find a way to Camp Jupiter, and right now their senses were screaming at them to head south. Though Esmerelda and Ethan were already aware that the camp was somewhere in the Bay Area, they just didn't know where exactly. So at least one good thing came out of their time at the Wolf House.

(Esmerelda's sword fighting skills were still atrocious compared to Ethan and Percy's so that didn't count either.)

"Yeah," said girl agreed with a short nod. "And we're not even close to leaving Sonoma yet. A drive from here to anywhere in the Bay Area should take about an hour."

"And on foot, that'd be about two days," Ethan added. "Essie, think you can Mist travel us farther ahead?"

There was a look in his eye that she understood. He wanted her to Mist travel them somewhere in the Bay Area to shorten the journey since they already had a pretty good idea where the camp was located (whereas Percy was clueless).

"I think I can," she replied. She felt pretty confident that she could take all three of them to the Bay Area. It wasn't that far either. She was just grateful Camp Jupiter was in the same state they were currently in. "I'll take us to San Francisco. My gut says the camp's somewhere there."

All of her meetings with Jason years before had taken place in San Francisco after all. So Camp Jupiter had to have been close by...

"Great," Ethan said. "Since it's late out, we should probably find a hotel to stay at once we reach the city."

Percy gave him a deadpanning look whereas Esmerelda's face turned a violent shade of red. Neither of them were fooled. They were able to read through his 'innocent' suggestion for a hotel.

"Right," Esmerelda gave her boyfriend a 'I know what you're planning, you little shit' look before shouldering her bag. "Hold on to me, and hold on tight. I'll take us to San Francisco right now."

Ethan and Percy made sure they had all their things (though it wasn't like the latter had much) before latching onto her arms.

"Okay," she breathed out. "Don't throw up on me! Now, one, two, th—"

BAM!

The door to the abandoned winery was kicked open. A whole SWAT team flooded in, guns drawn and aimed at them.

"Freeze! We've got the whole place surrounded!"

Bad timing. Esmerelda had completely lost concentration and worse, she was already in the midst of Mist traveling them away. Not even a second later, the three of them disappeared in a poof (which the SWAT team mistook as a smoke bomb thanks to the Mist).

They were ungracefully thrown out onto a hard surface.

"Those guys are almost as persistent as the monsters!" Ethan seethed through gritted teeth as he got off the ground.

"Ow," Percy said after he peeled his face off of the asphalt. "Where are we?"

"Oh nooooo," Esmerelda moaned in dismay, pushing herself off the ground with Ethan's help. "I lost concentration! Where did I end up taking us?!"

Ethan looked around. They must have been in the parking lot of some store, though there weren't many cars parked around. He turned around and saw a building with a bold red sign. It took him awhile to read what it was saying.

"...Napa Bargain Mart?" He guessed. "Napa's not too far away, so at least you didn't send us in a whole other country."

"Has that happened before?" Percy asked curiously.

She blushed. "Sometimes."

The three of them decided to enter the store, they needed some supplies anyways. Percy especially. He literally had nothing except the clothes on his back when he woke up in the Wolf House and Lupa didn't allow him to leave to get clothes, shoes, or anything. Esmerelda used the doubling charm to duplicate Ethan's backpack and clothes so the poor kid would have something (she made sure to change the color to blue though, since she knew it was his favorite color).

The store was pretty rundown and in need of repairs, so they decided to steal some cash off of some other guy at the parking lot rather than conning the store with fake Mist money.

There weren't many things Esmerelda needed from the store aside from food, so most of her little plastic basket was full of cheap snacks, a cute bath bomb she couldn't resist, and a reusable water bottle that she would fill up in the water fountain later.

Ethan however, was over at the kid's section.

"Hmm," he was inspecting a row of kid leashes very closely. "Do you think Nico would like the monkey one or the bear?"

She stared at him in horror.

"I'm just kidding." He cracked an innocent grin.

But he continued to eye that same rack with interest, and Esmerelda prayed he wouldn't actually try to buy one for Nico.

"Ethan!" She was aghast.

"Alright, alright," he thankfully moved away from that accursed aisle. "I'm glad you came to me though. How much money would you have left after you buy all that?"

"Um, with taxes? I don't really know, but I'd probably have ten dollars left." She answered.

"Damn," he muttered.

"What's wrong?"

"We might need some sleeping bags. There's a good chance it could take us days to find Camp Jupiter and we won't always be able to read a hotel in time." He pointed out.

Her face fell into worry. "I can return some snacks."

"No, we might need those. I haven't even thought of getting any food. We can't afford two, so we'll have to share one," he said, gesturing to the sleeping bag in his possession.

Esmerelda blinked. "What? There's no way we can fit in that."

He gave her a shit eating smirk. "You and I are both very aware of how good I am at stretching out tight things."

She nearly passed out. Ethan ended up laughing at the flustered look on her face. The situation worsened some more when she saw an elderly looking grandmother pass by their aisle, shaking her head in disappointment.

Don't shake your head at me like that! Esmerelda wanted to huff. If she counted her years as Maria, she would technically be older than that lady!

"Just—just finish your shopping," she muttered to her boyfriend before hurrying away to find Percy, leaving him cackling to himself.

She found Percy nearby and fortunately, he seemed to be nearly done with his shopping too. In his basket was a portable GPS, a lighter, a bottle of superglue, a water bottle, a camping roll, and a Swiss Army Knife. Good tools every modern demigod would need.

Right now he was standing in front of an aisle full of pillow pets with a thoughtful look on his face.

"Those look cute!" She beamed. "You should get one."

He picked up the panda one. "They're $13.99 and they're on a 70% off sale too, but... how much would it cost in the end?" He asked her.

She gave him a blank stare, her brain unable to do the simple math for that. "Dunno, but you should probably ask Ethan. He'll know."

For some odd reason, the idea of asking Ethan for help on anything math related caused a shiver to roll up his spine. He could literally hear the warning bells ringing in his ears as if danger was nearby.

He didn't think going to him would be a good idea.

But he decided to do it anyways because how bad could it be?

"Okay," he said, and he went off to find the older boy.

"Hey, Ethan, uh... I was wondering if you could help me out with something?" Gods, why was his palms so sweaty all of a sudden? Was he really that nervous?

Ethan gave him an irked look.

"Um, well... do you know what's 70% off of $13.99?" He asked.

Suddenly Ethan didn't look so irked anymore. No, instead, it looked like he wanted to rip his head off.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" He seethed. "You forgot how percentages work?!"

"I-I—"

"—How many times have I—?! UUUUGH!" Ethan blew up. "No! No, I'm not fucking going through this again!" He then went on to speak in another ancient language. Percy didn't recognize it as Latin, it sounded older than that, but somehow he was able to understand it a lot better. Right now, Ethan was angrily cursing out some lady named Hera or Helen or something. He wasn't exactly sure, the rambling was so fast-paced that he missed a few words.

He cleared his throat awkwardly, already beginning to inch back. "Right, uh, sorry for bothering you."

He high tailed it out of there and met back with Esmerelda, who was beaming down at a unicorn pillow pet.

"Well?" She said when she saw him. "What'd he say?"

"Uh, you should probably ask him instead." He suggested.

She tilted her head. "What do you mean?"

"J-just ask him."

She gave him a weird look, but left anyways. Percy followed behind sneakily, wanting to see what Ethan would do.

"Ethan, I need help," she began and Ethan was immediately at her side.

"Yeah?"

She raised up the pillow pet. "How much does this cost? It's $13.99 but 70% off."

"It's $4.20," he answered for her.

"Oh, okay thanks!" She smiled.

"No problem, babe," he said before sweetly pecking her on the cheek.

A few feet away from the scene, Percy's jaw dropped.

What the fuck? That's favoritism! So he was nearly seconds away from getting his head chopped off while Esmerelda got off scotch free? Totally not fair.

In the end, since they all had enough money for a pillow pet, all three of them got one. Percy got the panda, Essie got the purple unicorn, and Ethan got the rainbow cat with Esmerelda's insistence (she usually didn't like cats, but she knew he did).

As they fell in line behind the cash register, Esmerelda spotted a familiar face on the magazine rack and did a double-take.

"Oh no," she whispered under her breath when she came face to face with Étienne.

He was on the front cover of some crime magazine. He took up a small square off to the side, where a large picture of his whole family took up the rest. It had probably been taken by a magical camera, but the French ministry must have provided muggle reporters with an unmoving picture for obvious reasons.

The headline was a bold red and it said: FRENCH FAMILY SLAUGHTERED! SOLE SUSPECT IS THEIR SIXTEEN YEAR OLD SON, ÉTIENNE ROSIER. The date beside it was several months old.

Quickly, she nabbed the magazine and flipped to the page where the article would be covered. It took up two whole pages, but she skipped the parts she already knew before reaching to the very end. It took her an embarrassingly long time to read it thanks to her dyslexia, but she managed to get it:

Étienne Rosier was last spotted in San Francisco with his companion, who is suspected to be the unknown intruder during the Rosier family massacre. Other than the description we provided above, not much is known about the second accomplice.

He is incredibly dangerous despite his young age, and has been placed in the FBI Most Wanted lift of fugitives due to the heinousness of his crimes. He has also been suspected of several terrorist bombings, attempted murders, and thievery alongside his unnamed accomplice. If you spot him, do not engage and instead alert the authorities as quickly as possible. Both boys are most definitely armed.

Below those passages was a grainy picture of two boys inside a store. One of them was Étienne and the taller figure beside him was... Alabaster.

Well fuck.

She placed the magazine back on the rack and shook her head in assurance when Ethan shot her a concerned look.

They were both spotted in San Francisco. What if Alabaster was there at Camp Jupiter? She hoped not. She prayed he wasn't there. She wouldn't be able to take it if he was. Her nightmares about him had stopped months ago but she could feel them creeping back to her just like she could feel his invisible hands creeping up for her throat or the harsh punches he would deliver to her face. Just the very mention of him made her sick in the stomach.

Ethan nudged her quietly. She snapped out of her dark thoughts and realized that it was her turn to pay for her items. She quickly did just that and packed everything into her backpack. Percy went up next and soon enough, all three of them were ready to go.

"I'll Mist travel us back to San Francisco once we get outside," she told them, wanting to forget about the magazine she just read.

The boys nodded in response, and the three of them were just about to reach the automatic doors until a pair of ugly ladies stepped into their path. They were all wearing the green Bargain Mart employee vests, but that wasn't what caught their attention.

It was the fact they had chicken feet. And boar husks. And snake hair.

Gorgons.

The three demigods exchanged a tired look.

The monster on the right was holding a large platter of what looked to be some cheesy free samples.

"Hi there!" She smiled at them, holding the tray out. "Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners! Try some! They're free samples!"

Esmerelda and Percy actually tried to reach out for them, but Ethan brought their hands back down and gave them a stern look.

"No thanks..." The eldest of the three said, before glancing over at her name tag. "...Peano."

"What?" Percy squinted. "No, dude, it says Beano."

"I see Keano." Esmerelda chimed.

"Like Keano Reeves?"

"No, Percy, that's Keanu," she corrected.

"Stheno, you idiots!" The gorgon with the coral snake hair snapped. She was most likely the mean one between the two since her name tag read in Ancient Greek: Hello! My name is DIE, DEMIGOD SCUM! "Her name is Stheno!"

"Close enough," they said in unison.

"Euryale don't be so mean, they're customers," Stheno reminded her.

Euryale looked at her incredulously. "We're not actual employees, you fool! Now put that blasted platter down and help me kill them!"

Ethan brandished his sword and was about to behead them until some old lady—the same one who gave him and Esmerelda judgmental looks—walked through them as if a deadly fight wasn't about to happen.

"Wha—lady, would you get out of the way?!" He fumed.

The gorgons used that distraction as a chance to attack. Euryale's fingernails turned into claws and she lunged at Esmerelda, who threw a bunch of baskets at her before bolting for the dairy section. Stheno, meanwhile, chased Percy down an aisle while shouting about free Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners.

After Ethan was done arguing with the old lady, it suddenly dawned on him that everyone had been scattered throughout the store.

Oh my fucking gods, he thought as he ran around the place. Percy's stupidity rubbed off on me. I hate my life.

He found Esmerelda first. The dairy section was a complete mess. She must have tried to drown Euryale with milk because it looked like a complete flood zone. Esmerelda was already hurrying towards him—carefully though since she didn't want to slip on all the spilled milk. Behind her, he could see the destroyed form of the gorgon reforming.

He skidded over to her, sword drawn, and beheaded the monster only to see it reforming again.

"Fuck, they're reforming faster than the other monsters," he had a feeling Gaea had something to do with it. The sisters of Medusa were supposed to have faded after all.

"Let's just find Percy and get out of here," Esmerelda suggested.

They found him running through the sports section with Stheno close on his heels. Esmerelda wondered if there was some sort of sticking charm on the Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners because they hadn't fallen off the tray once despite all the jostling the holder was doing.

"Just one bite before I kill you! I swear you won't regret it!" Stheno offered generously.

"No thanks!" Percy said before he swiped her head off. She turned into a bunch of dust, the platter falling to the floor... but a second later she was back and picking it up again.

"Free samples?" She said, much to Percy's despair.

"STHENO! ENOUGH WITH THE SAMPLES! WE'RE NOT ACTUAL EMPLOYEES!" Euryale roared, teleporting to her sister's side.

"Alright, hold on to me. I'm getting us out of here," Esmerelda muttered, spotting a crate of bowling balls on the top shelf, just above the two gorgons.

Percy and Ethan quickly grabbed on to her.

She turned her attention back to the bowling balls, and the whole crate glowed green.

Stheno held up the platter to her sister, "But—"

"—NO!" Euryale tried to smack it out of her hands, but it looked like it hurt her more than it hurt the Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners. Esmerelda was intrigued. What the fuck were those snacks made of?

The gorgon hissed in pain. "Ugh, just help me kill them already!"

The crate started to tip over.

"Oh alright—"

BANG!

The crate of bowling balls dropped on them and there was a fwoosh of golden dust that blew at them. But not even a second later they started to reform again. Esmerelda didn't waste anymore time. She thought of San Francisco and Mist traveled away.

The unfortunate employee who was in charge of restocking the shelves stared at all the fallen bowling balls in resignation.

"I quit."

╞═════𖠁𐂃𖠁═════╡

Much to their absolute relief, they ended up in San Francisco. Even better was that they were right outside of a hotel. Even more better was that it was a top luxury hotel: the Four Seasons hotel (not to be mistaken as the Four Seasons Landscaping).

"This is awesome," Percy gushed as they exited the elevator to go find their rooms. "I don't think I've ever been to a luxury hotel before!"

You have, last summer, Esmerelda thought with a wince. But it was only because the whole camp needed shelter during the Second Titan War. He hadn't really been able to enjoy any of the luxuries...

"I wonder if there's a jacuzzi in there," he thought dreamily.

"Uh huh," Ethan said, but he was barely listening once they reached their rooms. They were right next to each other. "Our suites have a door connecting them to one another, but don't you dare step into our room, got it?"

"Yes sir," Percy saluted. He had a pretty good feeling he knew what they would be doing anyways. He just hoped the rooms were soundproofed.

"Ethan!" Esmerelda hissed in embarrassment, but all he did was give her a smug look before dragging her off to their room.

Their hotel room was amazing, as she expected from a five star hotel. The first thing they saw when they stepped in was the living area. There was a flatscreen TV on the wall, with a large grey L-shaped couch in front of it and an expensive looking coffee table. At the far end of the room was a large window covered by silvery drapes. Next to the couch was the door that connected to Percy's room (Ethan made sure to lock it). On the other side was a set of double doors that led to their bedroom. There was a large, bouncy looking bed along the wall, along with large, almost wall-height windows, and other decor.

Esmerelda was tempted to throw herself on the plush looking bed and call it a day, but she knew she needed a shower first. It had been so long since she stepped into a proper bathroom and took a real shower instead of some creek in the middle of the forest. She desperately needed this.

Ethan seemed to share the sentiment.

"Wanna shower?" He asked her after they dumped their bags on the floor.

"You want to take a shower with me?" She blushed, but then got an idea. "Wait! Can we take a bath instead?"

His smirk widened. "Sure."

She lit up. "Great! I've always wanted to try out the unicorn bath bomb I bought!"

His face fell. "Wait, what?"

But Esmerelda was too excited to have heard him. She rummaged through her bag and pulled out the weirdest bath bomb he had ever seen. It was purple with black markings that looked like eyelashes. On the top was what looked to be hot pink frosting with a golden horn sticking out of it.

What the fuck, he thought as soon he found himself sitting at the end of the bathtub, his elbow resting against the edge while the side of his face leaned against his fist boredly.

Here he was, naked, with his equally naked lover settled right between his legs... and she was gushing over a bath bomb.

"Oooohhh, look, Ethan! The unicorn leaves a rainbow trail!" She exclaimed.

"Uh huh," he said.

"And it even has sparkles!" She added giddily. "Isn't that cute?"

A smile crawled over his face as he leaned forward to hug her close, placing his chin atop her head.

"Mmm, very cute," he agreed, but he wasn't talking about the bath bomb.

He couldn't believe he had been cockblocked by a sparkly unicorn bath bomb of all things, but for once he didn't mind it too much. Esmerelda was enjoying himself, he was enjoying himself, Percy was... hopefully not doing anything stupid or suicidal, and everything was calm for the moment. They could pretend there were no monsters hunting them down, no Gaea to worry about, no mission they needed to succeed for a psychopathic goddess. Everything was okay even if this sense of comfort would only last for a few fleeting moments.

They stayed in the bath cleaning each other until the water turned cold. At that point, Ethan was so desperate for the two of them to just do it already that he practically yanked her down on his lap once they were finished dressing up.

"We should be going to sleep," she said, smiling when she felt his lips latch themselves onto her neck and started sucking in order to make a mark.

"No," he murmured stubbornly before nipping at her skin. He wrapped one arm around her waist and brought her down further on his lap, grinding his hips against hers desperately.

She let out a breathy sigh, tilting her head back to give him more access. It had been way too long since they had been able to do anything like this.

Ethan looked up, giving her a wolfish grin when he felt her move against the bulge in his pants. She was just as needy as him now.

"Giving in?" He asked her cockily.

Rather than answering, she laid herself down on the bed and pulled him on top of her, yanking her head down to kiss him eagerly.

He moaned in response, pulling away briefly to pull his shirt off and pressing his lips back on hers. His tongue swiped at her teasingly and his hands inched down to fumble with his pants—

—Knock knock.

They both froze.

"Hey, uh, guys?" Came Percy's meek voice from behind the door. "Um, I'm really sorry if I'm... uh, interrupting anything, but I kinda accidentally locked myself out of my room so can you help me get back in...? Please...?"

Ethan had to refrain the urge to scream.

"No." He said harshly.

"Ethan!" Esmerelda scolded from underneath him. "We have to help him! Now get off me."

Ethan crawled off of her, his nails digging into the bedsheets so hard he was nearly ripping them.

I FUCKING HATE THIS MISSION! He internally screeched.

╞═════𖠁𐂃𖠁═════╡

The next morning, the three of them joined the lobby for some nice free breakfast. Ethan was glaring daggers at Percy throughout the whole thing, but the boy was none the wiser.

"Guys, they got a game room and an arcade in here!" Percy exclaimed giddily.

Esmerelda lit up. "Seriously? Where?!"

"It's on the same floor," he jabbed a thumb behind him. "Let's check it out after eating!"

"Yes!" She nodded with enthusiasm.

"No," Ethan said tiresomely, rubbing his forehead.

Both teens deflated.

Esmerelda gave him a pleading look. "But Ethan, please?"

Ethan had to make sure he wasn't looking at her so he wouldn't give in. "No."

Percy's shoulders slumped. "Come on, dude, just ten minutes!"

"No," Ethan was exasperated at this point. "We don't have time for playing around. Our objective here is to—"

"—Find our way to Camp Jupiter," Esmerelda and Percy finished for him with glum expressions.

Ethan flashed them a satisfied smile. "Exactly. See, you're finally getting it. Now let's eat while we strategize our next move."

"We should split up," Percy suggested through a mouthful of hash browns. "San Francisco's a big place. We need to spread out to cover as much of the city as we can."

"No," Ethan shot the idea down immediately. "We need to stick together. The monsters will be tricky to get away from since they reform so quickly. There's safety in numbers."

That, and they needed to babysit him, a fact that Ethan always reminded Esmerelda about through his constant grumbling.

"Oh, yeah, good point," Percy blinked as if he had forgotten about their little monster problem.

Speaking of monster problem...

A familiar, cheery voice spoke up, "Free samples?"

Percy glanced up. "Ooh yes please! I love Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners—wait..." Horror dawned in on him. He snapped his head back to look at the woman's face.

It was Stheno. She was still dressed in her Bargain Mart employee vest and that dreaded platter full of Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners was still in her possession.

Esmerelda's jaw dropped. "You followed us all the way to San Francisco?!"

"'Course I did!" She chirped. "You never took any of the samples! Want some? They're free!"

Ethan was the first one to react. He took his sword and swiped her head off. Everyone in the lobby began screaming bloody murder.

"Let's go!" He shouted over all the noise.

They grabbed their things and bolted out of there. The farthest they could make it was several feet in front of the building's exit. Euryale was blocking the doors, dressed like a security guard.

"Oh damn it, Stheno, I knew you would fail!" She shrieked angrily before swiping at their heads.

Esmerelda ducked to avoid the claws before reaching out to uppercut the gorgon in the face. Other security guards joined the scene, and Ethan accidentally stabbed one in the chest before remembering his sword was made out of Celestial bronze and wouldn't actually kill any of them.

"Aw fuck," he cursed the guards pulled out their tasers. He quickly grabbed another guard to use as a human shield before tossing him away and kicking the other guard on the chin.

One guard grabbed Esmerelda from behind, but that didn't deter her much. She wrapped her legs around another guard who was in front of her, twisted her body around, and swiftly took the both of them down.

Another guard tried to tase Percy, but he wrenched it out of his hands and turned it on Euryale.

"Hah!" He laughed, pressing down on the button. Wires shot out of the gun and attached themselves to the gorgon.

"Brrbrbrbbrbbrrrrrbrb," Euryale said before she went down.

"Nice," Ethan complimented with a smirk. He stomped his foot over the monster's head, killing her instantly.

"Let's go," Esmerelda breathed out once she finished with the remaining guards. The three of them sprinted out the doors. They probably weren't going to be welcomed back there any time soon.

"I hope we never see those guys again," Percy shivered.

He, of course, just had to jinx it.

For the next several days the gorgons would be everywhere they were at. It was starting to get annoying. Especially when they refused to just stay dead.

Ethan had ran them over with a police car he stole. Percy cut their heads off at some park where a bunch of little kids were (which definitely traumatized the poor things). Esmerelda telekinetically hurled a vending machine at them (and got some free snacks too!). They had probably killed them over a hundred times already, and some of their kills had been very creatively done in Esmerelda's opinion.

The gorgons weren't all they needed to worry about either. Even the police were after their asses thanks to all the accidental crimes they committed. Esmerelda was pretty sure that she would soon become more wanted than Étienne and Alabaster were, which wasn't exactly a good achievement. 

But yeah, you could see why they were beginning to lose their minds at this point. They were tired. They hadn't slept properly for days. They hardly had time to eat because every restaurant they went to, those gods damn gorgons would be right there waiting for them. They mostly just ate vending machine gummy bears, stale bagels, even a Jack in the Crack burrito, which was a new personal low.

They looked like disasters too. Little cuts and bruises littered Esmerelda and Ethan's skin, and Esmerelda was way too tired to even try to heal them. Meanwhile, Percy was fine. His clothes were shredded, but the rest of him was untouched thanks to the Curse of Achilles—not that they could tell him that.

Currently, the three of them were sprinting to the top of some hill. Or well, struggling, to be more specific. Neither of them were in great states. Percy had been whacked across the head with a police's baton, Ethan had been tackled over a bridge by a deranged gorgon (Euryale) who had anger issues that could rival his own, and Esmerelda had been shot in the back of the leg by a police officer.

Suddenly, Percy paused, looking around. At his left, golden hills rolled inland, dotted with lakes, woods, and a few herds of cows. To his right, the flatlands of Berkeley and Oakland marched west—a vast checkerboard of neighborhoods, with several million people who probably wouldn't want their morning interrupted by two monsters and some filthy demigods.

Farther west, San Francisco Bay glittered under a silvery haze. Past that, a wall of fog had swallowed most of San Francisco, leaving just the tops of skyscrapers and the towers of the Golden Gate Bridge.

"Percy!" Ethan called out to him. "Why did you stop?"

"Sorry, I just... This place just reminds me of Annabeth."

He gawked at him. "Now is not the fucking time!"

"Guys!" Esmerelda snapped. "Quit fighting! What do we do next? Cross the bay or what?"

Before anyone could reply, they all tensed up, sensing danger nearby. A hundred yards down the slope, something rustled through the woods—snapping branches, crunching leaves, hissing.

Gorgons.

"Aw fuck," Ethan hissed under his breath. He glanced at the west side of the summit. It was too steep to descend. The slope plummeted eighty feet, straight to the roof of an apartment complex built into the hillside. Fifty feet below that, a highway emerged from the hill's base and wound its way toward Berkeley.

Esmerelda was too beat up to Mist travel all three of them to safety, so they were basically cornered with no other way off the hill.

"Guys," Percy's eyes widened. "Guys, the highway. It's gotta cut through the hill right?"

They looked at him, realizing what he was saying.

"There's a tunnel underneath us," Esmerelda stated.

"Exactly," he nodded. "Camp Jupiter's nearby. We're just too high up."

"We need to get to the highway," Ethan muttered, glancing down at all the cars. The only choices they had was to jump eighty feet to their deaths or stand and fight, and with the shitty states they were in and the fact that the gorgons reformed freakishly fast, they were pretty much screwed.

"There you are!" A happy voice exclaimed.

"Oh no, not you again...!" Esmerelda nearly sobbed.

Stheno reached them in no time. She was still wearing the same outfit as before, and worse, she was carrying the same fucking platter of Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners. Her platter was dented from all the times they had killed her, but those little samples looked perfectly fine. Stheno just kept toting them across California so she could offer them a snack before she killed them. In Esmerelda's opinion, Stheno and those samples were a gods damn nightmare.

"Try one?" Stheno offered.

Ethan hated those fucking Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners so much he tried to stab the tray. But to his never ending rage, she swiftly moved it to the side.

"Oh, put the sword away," Stheno chided. "You know by now that even Celestial bronze can't kill us for long. Have a Cheese 'n' Wiener! They're on sale this week, and I'd hate to kill you on an empty stomach."

"Stheno!" The second gorgon appeared on their right so fast, neither of them had time to react. Fortunately she was too busy glaring at her sister to pay them much attention. "I told you to sneak up on them and kill them!"

Stheno's smile wavered. "But, Euryale... Can't I give them a sample first?"

"No, you imbecile!" Euryale turned towards the kids and bared her fangs. "You've led us on quite a chase, demigod scums, but now you're trapped, and we'll have our revenge!"

"The Cheese 'n' Wieners are only $2.99," Stheno added helpfully. "Grocery department, aisle three."

Euryale snarled. "Stheno, the Bargain Mart was a front! You're going native! Now, put down that ridiculous tray and help me kill these demigod. Or have you forgotten that he's the one who vaporized Medusa?"

Percy stepped back. "Look, ladies, we've been over this. I don't even remember killing Medusa. I don't remember anything! Can't we just call a truce and talk about your weekly specials?"

Stheno gave her sister a pouty look, which was hard to do with giant bronze tusks. "Can we?"

"No!" Euryale's red eyes bored into Percy. "I don't care what you remember, son of the sea god. I can smell Medusa's blood on you. It's faint, yes, several years old, but you were the last one to defeat her. She still has not returned from Tartarus. It's your fault!"

"I didn't kill your sister! Essie, back me up here, I'm innocent, right?"

Esmerelda was the worst person to ask this.

"Uh, y-yes!" She stammered.

His eyes widened. He could see through her right away. "Wait, I seriously killed her?!"

Ethan face palmed.

"Er, how about we call it a draw?" Percy said awkwardly. "I was the one who killed Medusa, Essie and Ethan are innocent here, but I can't kill you and you can't kill me. If you're Medusa's sisters—like the Medusa who turned people to stone—shouldn't I be petrified by now?"

"Heroes!" Euryale said with disgust. "They always bring that up, just like our mother! 'Why can't you turn people to stone? Your sister can turn people to stone.' Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, boy! That was Medusa's curse alone. She was the most hideous one in the family. She got all the luck!"

Stheno looked hurt. "Mother said I was the most hideous."

"Quiet!" Euryale snapped. "As for you, Percy Jackson, it's true you bear the mark of Achilles. That makes you a little tougher to kill. But don't worry. We'll find a way."

"The mark of what?"

"Achilles," Stheno said cheerfully. "Oh, he was gorgeous! Dipped in the River Styx as a child, you know, so he was invulnerable except for a tiny spot on his ankle. That's what happened to you, dear. Someone must've dumped you in the Styx and made your skin like iron. But not to worry. Heroes like you always have a weak spot. We just have to find it, and then we can kill you. Won't that be lovely? Have a Cheese 'n' Wiener!"

Percy turned to his friends. "Did I really do that?"

Esmerelda looked away. She'd let Ethan handle this.

"What do you think?" Ethan exasperated. "You can't get hurt by anything, hmmm, I wonder why?"

His jaw dropped. "But who would throw me in the River Styx?! Holy shit, was it you?"

He scoffed in annoyance.

Esmerelda cleared her throat, "How about we focus on the gorgons first, yeah?"

Her eyes trailed over to the tray of Crispy Cheese 'n' Wieners. She was so hungry she could actually eat one right now...

"Reconsidering?" Stheno asked, noticing her stare. "Very wise, dear. I added some gorgon's blood to these, so your death will be quick and painless."

Well, there went that idea.

Percy's throat constricted. "You added your blood to the Cheese 'n' Wieners?"

"Just a little." Stheno smiled. "A tiny nick on my arm, but you're sweet to be concerned. Blood from our right side can cure anything, you know, but blood from our left side is deadly—"

"—You dimwit!" Euryale screeched. "You're not supposed to tell them that! They won't eat the wieners if you tell them they're poisoned!"

Stheno looked stunned. "They won't? But I said it would be quick and painless."

"Never mind!" Euryale's fingernails grew into claws. "The other two will be easy to capture, as for the sea brat, we'll kill him the hard way—just keep slashing until we find the weak spot. Once we defeat Percy Jackson, we'll be more famous than Medusa! Our patron will reward us greatly!"

"Before you slash me to bits," Percy said. "Who's this patron you mentioned?"

Euryale sneered. "The goddess Gaea, of course! The one who brought us back from oblivion! You won't live long enough to meet her, but your friends below will soon face her wrath. Even now, her armies are marching south. At the Feast of Fortune, she'll awaken, and the demigods will be cut down like—like—"

"—Like our low prices at Bargain Mart!" Stheno suggested.

"Wait," Ethan said, his face darkening. "What do you mean she will awaken? How?" He demanded.

"Oh you'll find out soon, son of Nemesis!" Euryale cackled. "You and the girl shall be there with front row seats!"

And then they attacked.

Ethan slashed his sword across Euryale's waist, cutting her in half while Percy grabbed Stheno's platter raised it.

Stheno found herself facing her own greasy reflection.

"Medusa!" she screamed.

Her sister Euryale had crumbled to dust, but she was already starting to reform, like a snowman un-melting.

"Stheno, you fool!" She gurgled as her half-made face rose from the mound of dust. "That's just your own reflection! Get him!"

Percy slammed the metal tray on top of Stheno's head, and she passed out cold. He then tossed it over to Esmerelda.

She already knew what he was planning before he could ever voice it. Quickly, she enlarged the tray until it was big enough to look like a metallic sled.

"Oh no," Ethan said when he saw it.

"Oh yes," Percy replied. "I'm sure it'll be fine. Come on, let's go. I'll even lead it."

He took the reign whereas Ethan sat at the back with Esmerelda sandwiched between them.

"You know how to control this thing, right?" Esmerelda asked him nervously.

"Nope," he said, sending a silent prayer to whatever Roman god oversaw stupid sledding tricks before pushing themselves down the side of the hill.

— author's note —

Here are the pillow pets!

Percy's:

Essie's:

Ethan's:

Ethan with Nico once he gets that leash:

Then:

Now:

From DreamBig867:

Look at this Hufflepuff clipboard Dragon Queen made 😍: