Matthew stared up at the ceiling above his bed, sleep continuing to elude him for the fourth night in a row. Sure, he had managed to nab a few hours here and there but sleep deprivation had started to take its toll. His script writing was suffering and his normally logical mind was struggling with everyday tasks.

Stephanie was worried about him. Despite his tired state, he didn't miss the concerned glances and the constant frown that was set on her face. He hated to see her anything but happy yet there was little he could do about it.

Why couldn't he sleep? This was the question that he had no answer for. There was nothing massively stressful going on in their lives, no family drama or relationship issue that would keep him awake at night. Even the comments section had responded positively to several of his latest theories!

He sat up, moving slowly so that he didn't wake Stephanie who was still sleeping next to him. Her rhythmic breathing soothed his racing thoughts – grounding him in that moment. Glancing back at his beloved wife, a soft smile crept up his face as he watched her chest rise and fall. She looked beautiful. Then again, she always looked beautiful to him.

Maybe he was thirsty? Swinging his feet down onto the floor and padding towards the kitchen. Instinctually dodging the various squeaky floorboards, he made his way down the stairs without causing a ruckus. He grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, pouring the cool liquid down his throat but not feeling any difference. He'd been eating well and hydration didn't seem to be a problem. He was in perfect health. Yet, his brain refused to quieten.

Plonking his tired form on the couch, he rested his head back against the cushions and sighed. Allowing his eyes to droop shut, he stared at the insides of his eyelids – trying not to focus on the swirling thoughts that invaded his mind. It felt as if thousands of ideas and worries were shouting all at once, screaming for his attention but flitting away the moment he focused on them. It was like he was chasing rabbits, his hands constantly grasping at the thin air that they had occupied moments before.

Skip stared at him from across the room, curious as to why one of the humans was awake. Normally he was alone at night, left to pad around his domain or to sleep until they returned after the sun had risen in the sky. Yet here his human was. Padding carefully across the room, he settled at his human's feet. Maybe his presence could bring comfort.

The soft fur and warmth of his furry companion brought a small smile to Matthew's face, quietening the thoughts for a moment. Staying as still as he could, Matthew relished in the moment. To have his mind be silent, even for a moment, was utter bliss. Life was so complicated. You lived from moment to moment, chasing ideas and dreams that were constantly out of reach. Ever since he had graduated from college, he hadn't really stopped working. Surviving from meal to meal, building up his channel from the ashes of his acting career – to the three channels and consulting business that he ran now.

Despite everything they had been through, Stephanie was still by his side. Without her, he wouldn't be where he was today. Without her, he wouldn't be Matthew Robert Patrick. He'd probably be in a rundown theatre somewhere, desperately struggling to pay his rent and to scrounge any ounce of joy out of his profession. Now he made people smile for a living, getting to stream and play video games with his wife as a career option. How could young Matt have known that his love of playing Mario as a child would bring him this far?

"Matthew? What are you doing down here?"

His wife's quiet voice broke the silence and interrupted his train of thought. Opening his eyes, he turned towards Stephanie – being momentarily stunned by how beautiful she looked to him. Tired eyes stared back at him with worry swirling in their brown depths. He gave her a soft smile, his heart soaring as he saw the small blush creep onto her cheeks. Even now, after all these years, they still had such an effect on one another. Love didn't fade, it strengthened and evolved as their relationship did.

"I couldn't sleep. Go back to bed Steph, I'll be up in a minute."

However, Stephanie didn't move back up the stairs. She moved to his side, plonking herself down on the sofa next to him. Skip raised his fuzzy head for a moment, taking note of her presence. His eyes seemed to glow in the darkness of the living room but they soon shut again, as their beloved cat decided that sleep was more important than whatever his humans were doing. Resting her head on Matthew's shoulder, Stephanie tried to find the words to explain how she was feeling to her husband but they wouldn't come to her.

The couple sat in the darkness together, resting against one another in companionable silence. Both were exhausted but they wouldn't rest without the other by their side. Matthew's thoughts moved to the future. His mind was filled with worst-case scenarios, terrifying thoughts of losing Stephanie or his job. What if YouTube went from bad to horrific? What if Stephanie decided she couldn't take the pressure of the job anymore? What if Jason and Chris decided they should take their skills elsewhere? What if they lost Skip? What if he lost... Stephanie?

Stephanie looked over at her husband, recognising the emotions that were moving across his face. Fear and sorrow seemed etched into his skin. His eyes seemed darker than normal, hinting at the dark thoughts that were battering at his spirit. Raising her hand, she placed it on his cheek – trying to bring as much comfort to him as she could without prying into his personal thoughts. Her touch startled him, causing him to escape his thoughts for a moment. The warmth of her hand acted like a jolt of electricity, giving him a reason to escape the dark abyss that was threatening to encompass his every waking moment.

Without saying anything, he took Stephanie's hand in his and laced their fingers together. Pulling his wife to her feet, they both went back to their bedroom and climbed in. They never let go. Soon Stephanie had fallen asleep, tiredness overcoming her stubborn attempts to stay awake until Matthew fell asleep. Her hair splayed out on the pillow and her breathing became calm and peaceful once more.

Holding tight to his wife's hand, he rubbed it soothingly. The feeling of her hand in his was all he needed in that moment. Knowing that she was there, by his side, made all the thoughts in his mind fall silent. His love for her was stronger than all the demons that plagued him. He just sometimes needed to be reminded that she was there and that she loved him. Despite everything, she loved him. That was the last thought Matthew had before he fell asleep.

A/N

Hi. So it's been a while.

There's been a lot going on in my life and writers block reared its ugly head as a result.

However, my love for GTLive and Matthew/Stephanie has not diminished. 

And my love for you guys as an audience and a community is all the stronger. Thank you to those who commented such lovely things on the last one and sorry to those who had been asking for an update for a while, can't believe it took so long.

This isn't my best piece but I've had a lot of issues with sleeping for the past few years so there's a lot more truth here than you might think.

Much love,

Caitlin.