2

This wasn't exactly the future that Hongjoong had dreamt of. Heck, no one would ever want something like this to happen. He wonders if he had been any quicker, would he be able to save Seonghwa just in time? Would he be able to grasp and pull him away before the car came crashing in? Would he still be... would he still be alive? Breathing in next to him? Being able to be close to him...

Having to lose a soulmate is similar to having been thrown into a paralyzed but conscious body. It felt as if he was stuck in time, neverending running from a path to reach where his soulmate is waiting. It was as if you were dying, but you were clearly alive and standing.

It was like losing a part of you that you never knew that you needed. When you find your soulmate, they are the person that you will live forever with, the one you share your life with, your other half. They are someone that you will love in either a platonic or romantic way.

To Hongjoong, having a soulmate was like a wish come true. He has always dreamt of meeting his soulmate ever since he had known about it. A fairytale that he wished to conquer and brag to everyone about. He may not be the most affectionate person, but for his soulmate, he will do everything to feel that they're loved.

Losing one, wasn't planned nor was it what he wished for. When the searing pain ran through his body, the hope inside of him crushed into pieces. His fingertips barely grazing at the purple sweatshirt that Seonghwa loves to wear, his yells growing to be useless, and his sight focused solely on the body topping over the car.

Seonghwa. Seonghwa. My soulmate. Seonghwa!

He was pulled backward by a hand, but he didn't pay much attention as he stared in horror at the lying body on the road. "Hongjoo-" He ran, stumbling forward at Seonghwa's unmoving body.

"Seo- Seonghwa...?" He fell down on his knees, his shaky hands hesitantly cupping the cold skin of his cheeks. "Seonghwa?" He whispered, hoping that the other had gone away unscathed from the hit. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes to listen to the heartbeat.

Colors drained from his face, his ears picking up on the slowly fading heartbeat. His eyes opened in a panic, frantically grabbing Seonghwa's shoulders and shaking him wildly. "Seonghwa! Seonghwa! Don't leave me! Please... Don't- Don't leave me..." He cried out, "You need to- You need to live! I can't-"

Seonghwa's lips twitched, Hongjoong being able to notice the small detail immediately. He grows quiet, stilling suddenly. He stared at him, hoping that movement meant that he was still conscious, that he is alive, that he'll open his eyes and hug him. "I love you," His hands tightened their hold on his shoulders.

"I love you. Please..." He kept muttering endlessly, tears blurring his vision. Through the blurry vision, he could see Seonghwa slowly making movements with his lips. It was as if he wanted to say something but no sound came out, yet Hongjoong could already tell what he meant to say.

That's when he felt it. A pair of arms sliding around his waist, a warmth so familiar ghosting over his shoulder, and then, a light feather touch caresses over his cheek. He's sure. He's sure this was Seonghwa hugging him... goodbye.

'Hongjoong... sorry... tomorrow...' The wind picks up around him. He could feel eyes around him, but all that he could focus on were the words that were whispered to him. It was Seonghwa's voice, it was Seonghwa's touch, it was Seonghwa.

Seonghwa...

His eyes widened, tears cascading down until a horrible sob clawed out of him. He buried his head on Seonghwa's chest, holding on to his body tightly. "I love you, Seonghwa."

Why...

"Please, please wake up. I love you! Do you hear me? I love you, please..."

Why do I have to lose you?

"Please..." He cries, his hand finding its way to intertwine his fingers with Seonghwa. His skin is cold to the touch, and he knew that the cold wasn't from his body but from Seonghwa.

It disappears.

The slowly fading heart had come to a stop. He held his breath, waiting for the next beat that he was clinging to but it never beats. The sound never came. It was gone.

"No..." He can catch the people yelling to move out of the way as the paramedics come to the rescue. He wants to push them in anger and frustration, shouting at them that they're too late, but he was too focused on trying to feel for Seonghwa's pulse, hoping a miracle may come.

It never did.

There were so many voices growing closer. A pair of hands pull him away from Seonghwa, his intertwined fingers falling off as he moves further and further until a wave of silence surrounds him. He could only stare at the body being moved in the distance, being brought on to small transportation.

He felt numb.

The feeling of being empty is cruel. He couldn't feel what emotions swirl around him. There was no warmth that he could always reach for in their bond, the warmth that made him sleep peacefully every day. There were no more strings that he could see tying themselves together, one that he always wants to appear in his vision. He could no longer feel the pain that Seonghwa was feeling at that moment before...

He remembers being guided to the vehicle, where Seonghwa's body is lying with remains of his blood all over his. Hongjoong slumped down on the wall in defeat, he didn't move. Not when the paramedic came to question him, giving up when they received nothing in return. Not when he could feel and see the blood of his soulmate staining his hand, a harsh reminder that he failed to save him in time. There was no turning back, he was truly gone. He couldn't hear any heartbeat, he wasn't moving at all.

"...sir, can you hear me?" His eyes glazed over, watching over Seonghwa in a peripheral view as his senses faded into nothing. All the sounds around him turn into a static sound, it is as if his head is underwater.

Everything crumbled around him.

Seonghwa is a human. He knew that. He knew that he could lose Seonghwa anytime, having a human life that isn't like his. He knew that as soon as they first met, and even if the aspects of a human and a vampire being soulmates rarely existed, and looked down upon his community, he did not care. Seonghwa is his soulmate, he accepts him for whatever he is. He is someone that Hongjoong will protect and love until the end of time. But, not like this. Never like this.

He never imagined that he would hear the horrible sound of the heart monitor falling into a flat line, something that he only heard of from others. He never imagined that he would be standing in front of a grave with the name of his soulmate carved on the stone. He never imagined that he would be alone for the rest of his life, growing insane without his soulmate by his side.

Not having the ability to heal from the loss of his soulmate, he grows weaker and weaker. It was as if he turned into a human as he stopped eating, drinking, and taking care of himself altogether. He didn't care how he lived, his time had already stopped when he lost Seonghwa.

"Today... It was supposed to be our first date." He remembers telling Seonghwa. He had been told that Seonghwa didn't make it that day, and he was given time to tell Seonghwa goodbye. He hates saying goodbye like this. "We were both so excited... I saw the excitement shining in your eyes, and I thought that 'I will finally be with you, I was happy knowing that both of us want to spend time together." He hesitantly extends his hands towards the pale face lying on the hospital bed. He let the tears fall for one last time, a whimper falling off his lips until he pushed the chair backward, wrapping Seonghwa into a tight hug.

"What am I supposed to do now...?" He sobs, "Not that... Now that I don't have something to look forward to... How can I live without you?" He could feel the remnants of pain lingering over his body, that moment when he reached out to Seonghwa, his fingertips barely grazing. He remembers having to watch Seonghwa skip away happily after he asked him on a date, seeing him out of the door then noticing the running car way too late. He didn't care if other people saw him speeding up towards Seonghwa, all that he could think about was that his soulmate was going to get run over.

His emotions were all over the place. Everything that surrounds him always reminds him of Seonghwa. Especially the cafe, he wonders if he can keep it running. Would he be able to work knowing that he doesn't have anyone that he can look forward to every day? He awaits the same familiar face every day, and now that it's gone... What's the point?

A sigh left his lips. What would Seonghwa think if he saw him in this state? It's a horrible feeling to know that he doesn't have much information about his soulmate. To be thinking these thoughts, and to be devoured completely by the endless loop of a depressive state. He wonders if Seonghwa could only watch him crumble, or would he wrap his arms around Hongjoong? He will never know.

Before he knows it, he is walking towards the cafe. The memories flash in front of his eyes as soon as he pushes the door open. He is greeted by Chan, shooting him a sympathetic but comforting smile. He offers a glass of strawberry yogurt milkshake.

Hongjoong eyes the shake, Chan didn't probably mean to bring up another memory but it couldn't be helped. He took a deep breath, everything reminded him of Seonghwa, even his favorite drink... It's a nightmare. The fact that it had only been months since they had met, his whole world has already made its way to entangle them together yet he knows nothing of Seonghwa. What is his world like? What does he go through every day?

"You should take a rest, let me handle the counter." Chan snapped him out of his thoughts, "It's been difficult, hasn't it? Don't push yourself, okay?" Hongjoong managed a small smile, shakily taking the strawberry milkshake that was being offered to him

He muttered a quiet 'thanks' as to show his gratefulness towards Chan's patience in staying with him. Without a soulmate, it's difficult to even function daily. Something is always missing, and he knows what it is. It's like an itch that he couldn't reach.

"You know, losing a soulmate is harsh. Isn't it?" He snaps his head towards an unknown person sitting in one of the booths, "Feeling the connection fading away, not being able to see the string connected to them anymore. It hurts, doesn't it?" Hongjoong felt more horrible hearing those words, he was about to ignore the person but their next words caught his attention back.

"I lost my soulmate too." He bitterly laughed, eyes cast downwards. "We were already married. We were happy, but... the vampire community was crueler than the devils. They killed him right in front of my eyes, telling me that having a human as a soulmate is forbidden. Never been heard of." He scoffed, choking out what sounds to be a cry.

"Forbidden...?" Hongjoong never knew that it was against his community, or that it will get him and Seonghwa in danger.

"That accident, would you believe me if I say that it is all planned?" He turned to Hongjoong, "I had been here since you met him and I kept watch because I wanted to protect the blooming love between the both of you. One that I lost already. They... The higher-ups were watching you too." He never heard of this before, he didn't see anyone anywhere nor did he detect them. Chan would have told him if he felt something was off, which means they are really well-hidden.

"How... It couldn't be... How could you know that it was planned?" He felt confused, this... no, the accident is just an accident... but how can he be sure? It was a hit-and-run, he never got to confront the driver nor see him. What if...

"It's a coincidence that the car is speeding up as soon as your soulmate leaves the cafe, isn't it?" He smiled sadly at him, "They did the same with my husband, but at that time, there were no eyewitnesses and so, they vanished him after that accident." He looked down at the silver band wrapped around his ring finger, an initial carved in it that Hongjoong could recognize as S.H and I.S.

"I don't know... I just... Seonghwa was the only one I had eyes on when it happened."

"I saw him again." Hongjoong furrowed his eyebrows, "My soulmate, my husband. I saw him. All that I could tell you is that you may not feel the bond anymore but he is somewhere here. It may take months, years, or even decades but he will appear."

Hongjoong slammed his hands down on the table in shock, looking at the man in front of him. "What do you mean?"

"After 5 years without him. I saw him walking with another person. He has the same face, same voice, and... he was wearing this ring." He held up the silver ring on his finger. "It was him, I am sure of it but..." Before he could continue the story, a loud crash caught their attention.

"Joong!" Chan shouted for him, "Someone threw a rock towards the window!" Hongjoong didn't want to pay much attention to it, but when he turned back to ask the man for at least his name or in any means of communication, he was gone.

Hongjoong slumped his shoulders, there was absolutely no point in believing the words of an unknown man. He had just seen him, maybe even imagined him. There was no proof whatsoever of what happened to his soulmate. It was an accident. 

He shook his head to rid of the thoughts then walked towards Chan, who was looking around for the culprit. "You didn't see who threw it?" Hongjoong asked, with Chan answering with a shake of his head. "Maybe some teenagers pranking again."

"No, there was a scent left behind. It smelt unknown and not anything that a human possesses." Chan stood up, holding the rock in his hand. "Maybe perfume? Cologne? Not sure. By the way, who were you talking to? He has the smell of a vampire mixed with something else."

"I didn't get his name but he was telling me something." And so, Hongjoong told him what the man had said. He finally concluded that at least the man wasn't something that he imagined, and maybe he also has a point. Though, he isn't too sure to trust him,

Chan clamped a hand to his shoulder, "You should be careful then, if the man says those things then there may be some truth behind it at some point. Vampires... from my experience as well, they really aren't the nicest to be around which is why I also left."

"Do you think... Seonghwa... Do you think I will be able to see him again?" Chan smiled comfortingly.

"I'm sure the day will come. For now, survive while knowing he may be here somewhere and that someday, the both of you will cross paths once again." Hongjoong hesitantly nodded, "Soulmates are always meant to find each other, no matter how many decades may come without each other."

'They are always connected with or without bond.'


I've been out of the loop for a while, I haven't really been up to date on what's happening, and also been away from my socials T^T I feel quite bad for losing touch, but I'm slowly regaining my focus again. Well, it's a try?

Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: AzTruyen.Top