Vermont: Welcome to mental health with Rhode Island!

Rhode: Don't kill yourself. Outlive your enemies...

Vermont: And that was mental health with Rhode Island. Come back next time, where he teaches you that sometimes you should not set your anger issues aside and slap that hoe! Goodbye!

---

Mets: *Hands Bills a bat*

Bills: What do I do with this?

Mets: Ya hit balls with it.

Bills: *Hits Giants in the balls*

Giants: *High pitched screaming and crying*

Mets: NOW YOU KNOW DAMN WELL I WASN'T TALKING ABOUT THOSE KINDA BALLS!! I'M TELLING APPLE!!

Bills: Worth it.

---

Texas: Believing all women is the dumbest thing I've Amber Heard.

Cali: *Wheeze*

---

Jackson: If I was a woman, I'd let all the homies hit.

Nashville: You have an ass tho.

San Antonio: So what's the hold-up?

Jackson: *Sweating* Wha-

---

Lil' Indiana: Uncle... Can you read me a bedtime story?

Gov: *Whose never done this before* Uh-

Gov: Once there was an ugly duckling and he was so ugly everyone died! The end!

Lil' Indiana: *Crying* T-that's a bad story!!

Gov: ShIt-

---

Michigan: *Holding Detroit on a leash* How's your son?

Maryland: *Doing the same but with Baltimore* Alright! He didn't murder anyone today! That I know of at least...

Michigan: That's great! I stopped mine from robbing a convenience store today! It's been a good day for me since.

Mass: Ok what the fuck is this conversation-

---

Lil' Supreme Court: I'm in charge now! And- uh. Yeah! I have the most court power!

Everyone: Ok fam.

---

DC: You're one of the loves of my life and I would do just about anything for you!

Louie: So... Can you get a decent sleep schedule and eat three meals a day?

DC: . . .

DC: But dad said-

Louie: SHA, FUCK YOUR DAD! AND NOT LITERALLY!! *Turns to Alabama*

Alabama: WE DON'T FUCKING DO THAT-

---

Ohio: You'll never believe what I just found!

Michigan: What?

Ohio: *Takes out a ruler with a knife taped to it* It was in Columbus's room! It's got "Toledo killer" written horribly on the back. Should I be worried?

Michigan: You know... I would say yes... But you wouldn't fucking listen.

---

Virginia: *Explains something*

SC: *Turns to NC and proceeds to explain it in a much simpler way on purpose*

---

Geo: We shouldn't start any war with Great Britain! Right guys? I mean he's no longer around us-

Mass: I chucked tea into the harbor.

Virginia: You fakin' wut mate-  

---

PA: I have really high standards-

NY: You're with Kentucky and Georgia...

PA: I don't fucking judge you for your weird taste in men ok.

NY: YOU DO ALL THE TIME!

PA: YEAH, WELL EXCUSE ME FOR THINKING YOU COULD DO BETTER THAN TEXAS, LOUISIANA AND FLORIDA OK!! CALI AND DC ARE FINE I... GUESS BUT LIKE DUDE! REALLY??

NY: SHUT THE FUCK UP-

---

Utah: A stranger walked up to me today and said I was really hot. I didn't know what he meant because it was really cold outside.

Nevada: I'm going to kill him-

Coco: Nooo! Leave the child alone! >:C

---

Nebraska: I think it's an awesome idea, Montana!

Missouri: If you say you don't I'll kiss you.

Nebraska: That idea sucks.

Montana: You can't bribe him with smooches, that ain't fair!

SD: You could bribe me with some-

Montana: Out. Now.

---

Ohio: I... Think I might be gay.

Alabama: We've been together for years now and you just say that-?

---

Gov: Listen. Listen. Mr. Speckles said I could bring home more cats.

IDC: Well I didn't!

Gov: I CAN'T SAY NO TO MR. SPECKLES COUSIN-

---

Hawaii: *Pins Rhode to a wall* Hello~

Rhode: Am I really this fucking short?? *About to cry*

Hawaii: Babe-

---

Wyoming: I love DC with all my heart.

Idaho: Then ask him out.

Wyoming: I can't.

Idaho: You are the dumbest mother fucker I've ever met.

Wyoming: Rude-

---

Tennessee: Please no-

Texas: Are you from Tennessee?

Oklahoma: *Does a dance* Because your are the only ten I see. 

Arkansas: Why do I hear boss music-

---

Kentucky & PA: *Shows any bit of thigh at all*

Geo: Is for me? 👉👈

---

San Francisco: What just happened? Why is the house a mess?!

Albany: LA and NYC fought over you again.

SF: Shit! Are they alright?

Albany: Lol no. Savannah nearly killed them because they woke him up from his nap with Dallas. They're in the hospital.

SF: Excuse me-

---

Houston: Ok... So... What's the issue?

NASA: *Motions to NADA (North Korea's space agency)* THIS!! THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE OF ME!!

NADA: I WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU!! CAPITALIST SWINE! LET ME GO HOME!

NASA: CHANGE YOUR NAME FIRST!

NADA: NO-!

---

Florida: Do you really say "Bleh bleh bleh" like the movies?

Transylvania: Can I go home?

IDC: Yes... I'm so sorry-

---

Virginia: Remember. Don't fall for any man. Men are stupid.

PA: Your brother is hot tho-

Virginia: What the fuck is wrong with you?!

---

Satanic Temple: I think we need space.

NASA: Please never make puns in front of me again...

---

National Guard: You called?

FBI: *Crying with a small puddle of blood around his head*

CIA: He fell down the stairs and bit his lip too hard.

National Guard: I hate all of you.

---

Lil' District: Father. I request murder. Can we kill DC's father?

Mary: Excuse me-

---

IDC: If Paris is the city of love... What's the city of hate?

Paris: Still me.

London: Knew it-

---

Anyone: *Doesn't speak French in France*

France: *Disgusted French noises*

---

Louie: Fuck. I need your help.

Mississippi: Absolutely not-

Louie: Please! I just need your blood!!

Mississippi: Explain to me why elaborating further would help you in this case?

---

CDC: Hey guys-

CIA: *Possibly dead on a piano*

FBI: *Eating candy eyes while stabbing a watermelon repeatedly*

CDC: Nevermind...

Pardon my brain for sucking. I have a lot of work to finish. I'll probably try to get it out by today or tomorrow. Or some time next week. Brains be big dumb smooth. :C

Bai bai-