Miami: Aquaman could also be called liquid man.

Houston: Go to bed...

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Poland: Is... This... Common?

D.C: Yeah.

Florida: *jumping off the roof with cardboard wings* I BELIEVE I CAN FLY!!

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Cali: Life is a sexually transmitted disease 

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Nebraska: Isn't butter a loaf of milk?

Coco: Isn't birth certificates just baby receipts?

Nebraska: ...

Coco: ...

Nebraska: Friends? 

Coco: Best friends :D

Utah: Oh... oh no...

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Oklahoma: I got this nice cock! Wanna see? :)

Tenn: WhAt-

Oklahoma: *takes out a chicken* What were you thinking?

Tenn: Nothing...

Oklahoma: Oh. Ok :D

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Austin: Guys...

Dallas: What's up big bro?

Austin: I lost my virginity. 

Houston: Wow... IT'S ABOUT TIME!

Texas: Ya wanna sit and talk about it?

Austin: I would but my ass still kinda hurts...

San Antonio: ¿Espera lo que? (Google said it means: Wait what?)

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S.C: *teaching his kids about politics* What would everyone like for dinner? 

The cities: Pizza!!

S.C: Ok, I'll make tacos because y'all don't live in a swing state--

Charleston: DAMN YOU, POLITICIANS!! 

S.C: :)

:D