edit by frxnch_eroda

When Harry comes home from work the next day, neither Gracie or Louis are downstairs. He sighs, setting his laptop bag down. He hears something faint upstairs, and he furrows his eyebrows to go check.

Upon approaching Gracie's room, he sees Louis sitting criss-cross on the end of Gracie's bed, a guitar in his lap. Gracie's laying down, looking at Louis with a stuffed bear tucked under her arm. Neither of them notice Harry. Quietly, he leans against the doorway.

"One more song, Daddy?" Gracie asks, her voice soft with sleepiness. "The Gracie song?"

Louis smiles warmly. "Sure, baby, but then you have to get some sleep, okay? We've got big, blueberry picking plans tomorrow with Papa." Gracie nods, and Louis looks down at his guitar, strumming a bit before finding the tune.

"You can't fool me," Harry closes his eyes to the sound of Louis' voice, taking him back to when they were younger, and he had just bought that guitar for Louis for his birthday. "I saw when you came out, you got your Papa's taste, but you got my mouth..."

Gracie giggles a little at that. Harry opens his eyes to look at her, gazing up at Louis like he's her whole world. Harry melts a little. "And you will always have a part of me, nobody else is ever going to see, Gracie girl," Gracie's eyelids flutter closed, a faint smile still on her lips. "Life flies by in seconds, you're not a baby, Gracie, you're my friend, you'll be a lady soon, but until then, you gotta do what I say..."

Louis notices Harry standing there. They had been silent towards each other that morning, their only interaction being Harry kissing the top of Louis' head before leaving to take Gracie to school. "You nodded off in my arms watching TV," Harry walks into the room as Louis continues, sitting next to him. Gracie opens her eyes once she feels the bed dip. "I won't move you an inch, even though my arms asleep..."

"Hi Papa," Gracie whispers once Louis' finished singing that line. Harry smiles tiredly, giving her a little wave.

"One day you're gonna want to go," Louis' voice is soft, and raspy, and could probably put Harry to sleep right then and there, if he let it. "I hope we taught you everything you need to know, Gracie girl..."

"And there will always be a part of me nobody else is ever gonna see," Louis smiles a little upon noticing Gracie is almost asleep. "But you and me, my little girl, my Gracie girl."

Louis finishes the song. "Love you, Daddy," Gracie says, even her voice sleepy. "Love you, Papa."

"Love you more, Gracie girl," Harry leans over and kisses Gracie's forehead. "Get some good sleep."

"Hope you dream about all the blueberry muffins we're gonna make tomorrow," Louis grins, carefully climbing off the bed with his guitar. Harry turns off the light, making sure her nightlight is on, and follows Louis out of the room, quietly closing the door behind them.

"She wants to go blueberry picking?" Harry breaks the silence that builds up for a few seconds. Louis shrugs, carrying the guitar by its neck to the bedroom. Harry follows him.

"That's what she told me," He says, voice dull. Harry frowns.

"I'm sorry about last night," He says sheepishly. "I went too far."

Louis sighs, shoulders slumping a little. He sets his guitar down on its stand. "We both did," He replies, his eyes still not meeting Harry's. "We fight a lot."

"We do," Harry's voice is barely a whisper. "I know we do." 

Louis is quiet for a moment, leaning against the wall and seemingly thinking through something for a moment. "Do you want a divorce?" He asks. It's hard to even force the words out.

Harry immediately opens his mouth to protest, and then closes it again. "I don't know," He admits. "I don't want one, no. But I think we're coming to the point where we're beyond repair."

"We're beyond repair?" Louis scoffs. "Or you are?"

"Louis, please," Harry's getting emotional. He can't help it, honestly. He wishes he could stay stone faced like Louis. All of the fights he's seen Louis have with his sisters or mum or friends, he stays strong until he's alone. Harry can't do that.

"I'm being serious, Harry," Louis shakes his head. "You're the one who changed. Your values, your priorities, everything. I don't know who you are anymore."

"I'm not having this argument again," Harry puts his face in his hands. "We're not nineteen anymore, Louis."

"If we were..." Louis' about to say something really hurtful, like how if they were nineteen right now, he would have ended things with Harry right then and there, but he doesn't. Because he wouldn't mean it. Sometimes he looks for something to say just to hurt Harry's feelings. He looks down at his feet.

"What?" Harry challenges.

"Never mind," Louis goes and opens the drawer of his bedside table, pulling out a box of cigarettes and stuffing them into his pocket. He doesn't even know how long the box had been sitting in that drawer. "I need some air."

Louis waits for half a moment for Harry to stop him, to beg him to stay so they can talk this out like adults, but he doesn't. He just sits on the bed and wipes his teary eyes. So Louis leaves.

♛

Louis comes back forty-five minutes later. Harry's drinking. He's pouring a bit of vodka into a can of soda. There are two other cans of soda on the nightstand, presumably empty. He's drunk.

"Hope you have an explanation prepared if Gracie wakes up and you're proper hammered," Louis rolls his eyes.

"Was too busy thinkin' of one for why you were gone," Harry says, words coming out very slowly.

"Think she's so used to you being gone, she wouldn't have even cared."

"Fuck you," Harry's voice is shaking. "I'm a fucking good dad. Me working hard doesn't make me a bad person."

"Keep telling yourself that, Styles," Louis says, and the look on Harry's face tells him that cut deep. Styles isn't his last name anymore, hasn't been for a long time.

"Remember when I was pregnant with Gracie," Harry sniffles, eyes watery. "And when she wouldn't settle, and I couldn't relax because she was kicking so hard, you would pull out your guitar and play us Ed Sheeran or The Fray until she'd calm down. And now..." Harry's face crumples. "Now you won't even look at me anymore."

Louis doesn't know what to say. Harry loses his filter when he's drunk, and Louis has never known how to handle it. "You used to love me so much," Harry weeps. "You used to bring me lunch at work during your break and tell your mum you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me. I hate this. I wish we could have just been young forever."

"We're still young," Louis says quietly. "We still...we have time."

"Time for what?" Harry wipes the tears running down his cheeks. "For...for fighting? And ignoring each other? And pretending like we still feel the same way we used to?"

"I-" Louis lets out a shaky breath. "I don't know. I really don't know, Harry."

"We're ruining Gracie," Harry's sobbing now. "She's going to grow up not knowing what two parents who really love each other looks like, and she's not going to know how to be happy in a relationship because of us!"

"Okay, okay," Louis walks over and takes the half full vodka soda out of Harry's hand. "We're going to get you changed and then to sleep, okay?"

"I miss you," Harry grabs onto Louis' wrist. Louis softens.

"I know, pet," He says gently. "Let's get you to bed. We'll talk tomorrow."

"No we won't," Harry says knowingly. Louis doesn't object.

♛

"This is a big one, Daddy," Gracie gasps, picking a blueberry and holding it up to show Louis. Louis gasps over-dramatically.

"Oh my gosh, it is!" He holds out their basket so Gracie can put it in. "Good eye, peanut."

Gracie looks over to where Harry's standing off to the side, talking on the phone with one of the higher-ups at his law office. "Papa said no workin'," Gracie says, pouting.

Louis twists his mouth. "Hey, that bush looks like it has some big ones," He changes the subject. Gracie looks over before grinning and rushing to it. Louis follows her, glancing back at Harry and sighing to himself.

"Stay where I can see you, pretty girl," Louis says to Gracie before walking towards Harry, keeping his eyes on her the whole time. Harry is seemingly just hanging up with whoever he's talking to. "Your daughter is requesting your presence."

"I'm sorry," Harry says weakly. "I'm coming."

Louis just looks at him for a moment before nodding slightly. He walks towards where Gracie is standing, two handfuls of blueberries waiting to be put in the basket. Louis grins at her, holding it out so she can dump them in.

"Look at all the boo-berries we got, Papa," Gracie beams up at Harry. "We can make so many muffins!"

"That's awesome, princess," Harry smiles softly. "We can make some and bring them to Nana Jay tomorrow when we visit her."

"Okay!" Gracie's smile brightens. She's so fucking cute. Louis lifts her up and peppers her with kisses, making her squeal. He can't help but notice the fond sort of smile on Harry's face.