Teddy

THE BATHROOM IS FILLED WITH STEAM AND the shower door is fogged up. I hear soft grunts mixed in with the sound of the water hitting the shower walls, and my eyes widen as I slowly open the door to find Jensen with his cock in his hand. His head is titled back with his eyes shut, the water splashing onto his face.

Since he hasn't noticed my presence yet, I quietly walk into the shower, closing the door to seal us in the warm cocoon. His back is to me; and I watch the muscles strain as his hand works his cock. I slowly step closer to him, inching my arm around him to cover my hand with his and I lick the water droplets off his back. He startles and his movements immediately halt under my hand. His body stiffens and he curses in a choked voice.

I kiss his back and lick the water some more. When he still doesn't resume the movement of his hand, I squeeze my hand over his, nudging him to continue. "Can I help, baby?"

His head drops and he groans. "Fuck, Teddy. No."

"You don't have to be embarrassed," I whisper, resting my cheek against his back.

"It is embarrassing, though. Isn't it?" His body is still tense before me.

"No," I reply confidently. "Why would it be embarrassing?" I wrap both my arms around his middle in a comforting squeeze. "I think it's hot."

He turns to face me, wearing a sheepish expression, and cups my face in his large hand. "Hot, huh?" His thumb skims over my jaw.

I nod in reply and tuck my bottom lip into my mouth. He tracks the movement and uses his thumb to release my lip from my teeth. He lowers his mouth to mine for a soft kiss, his lips warm and wet from the shower.

"What were you thinking about?" I ask him.

"You. Always you." He kisses me again but adds more heat this time, his tongue seeking entrance into my mouth. His hard cock twitches between us, a heavy reminder of what I walked in on. I grip him tightly in my hand and he gasps into my mouth, pulling away to find me smirking up at him.

"It's ok to do it yourself, baby," I say, jerking him off the way I observed him doing it only moments ago, "but I'm always here to help. You did just make me come in bed a few minutes ago after all."

We had a lazy morning in bed. Jensen only leaving for the few minutes it took to let the dog out and feed him before hopping back in and covering my body with kisses and touches that started on my face and moved ever so slowly down my body until he was between my legs and I was screaming his name.

Now in the steamy shower I run my thumb over the head of his cock before gripping it tightly as I move my hand up and down slowly. His eyes fall closed for a few seconds before he returns his half-lidded gaze to me. "I love making you feel good, baby. I don't need anything in return."

"I'm going to give it to you anyway."

I fall to my knees before him, and peer up at him with a smirk before I take him into my mouth. There's a wet plop as he slaps a hand against the shower wall to prop himself up and his other one holds the wet hair out of my face as I circle my tongue over the tip and then immediately take him in my mouth as far as it'll go.

"Fuck," he groans, his head falling back. His hips twitch in the effort to hold himself back from thrusting into my mouth, his legs trembling. "Jesus, Teddy." His grip in my hair tightens as if he's losing the battle to submit, desperately wanting to take control.

I palm his ass and shove him toward my face, giving him permission to unleash the restraints. He studies me for a moment before he relents and gives a tentative thrust, his cock diving deeper than before. I gag; and when he tries to wiggle away, I push him forward again with my hand against his ass. He gives another gentle thrust in time with my prodding hand, and soon he is fucking my mouth slowly. With both his hands in my hair now, he watches as he slides his cock in and out of my mouth, deep noises vibrating out of him.

I cup his balls in my hand, alternating between soft massaging and rougher tugging. His pace picks up and I close my eyes as tears stream down my cheeks and I breathe deeply through my nose.

I can tell he's close by the way his hips lose the coordinated rhythm and his grip tightens in my hair. I hum against him, the vibrations of my throat setting him off, and his thrusts are rapid, shallow plunges into my mouth until his body stiffens, movements halted, and he comes down my throat in a long, deep moan.

"Baby," he whispers in a gravelly voice. His large palms hold my face as he peers down at me, his chest moving rapidly with his deep breaths as he fights to come down from the orgasm. "You can take a shower with me anytime."

I laugh as he helps me to my feet. "So that was better than jerking off by yourself?"

He hauls me to him for an aggressive kiss, his hands roaming all over my body, his teeth nipping against my lips, his tongue roughly swiping against mine.

When we pull apart, one of his hands is fondling my breast, his thumb lazily swiping over my nipple, and the other is squeezing my ass cheek in a firm grip, holding my body tightly against him. "Baby, anything you do is better than what I can imagine in my head."

I peck his lips roughly and then push against his chest until he releases me. Reaching around him, I grab his shampoo and squirt some into my hand, rubbing it together to create a lather. I motion for him to turn around and I go up on my tiptoes to massage the shampoo into his hair.

He groans in pleasure. "I think we should do all our showers this way from now on, baby."

After I finish rinsing his hair, he spins us so I'm fully under the spray of the warm water. He tips my head back to completely wet my hair and he squirts some of my shampoo into his hand. He sniffs the strawberry scent and smiles as he gently washes my long hair. My eyes fall closed, and I savor the feel of his fingers scraping against my scalp.

"Mmmm, I think you're probably right about that, J. This is heaven. I could get used to it."

After we finish helping each other wash our bodies, Jensen turns off the shower and dries me off with a large towel, spending extra time at my boobs, pausing to kiss and nibble them, before he finally wraps me up tight in the towel. He dries himself off quickly and follows me into his bedroom.

When he sees me rummaging in my bag for clothes, he groans and rips the bag off the floor in one hand while towing me into his walk-in closet by my wrist with his other hand. He opens a drawer of his dresser, and I only have a moment to notice it's empty before he dumps half of the contents of my bag into it. He slams it closed and opens the one below it and empties the rest of the bag into it. He closes it with his hip and turns to glare at me in all his grumpy glory.

"I'm sick of seeing this fucking bag," he croaks at me. "No more, Teddy. This isn't a sleepover. You're here enough. You might as well keep some stuff here."

"My grumpy romantic," I fake swoon with my hand over my heart.

"Shut it, baby. I'm being serious. Someday you'll move all your shit here. If I had my way, it'd be tomorrow. But considering we're taking this slow, that's probably not a good idea. So for now, you get some closet space. Just like I promised."

"You do realize that made no sense, right?"

He eyes me in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

I resist the urge to laugh at him. He's just so cute when he's worked up. "You said if you had your way, I'd move in tomorrow. But then you said we're taking this slow. Both of those are you, J. Fast or Slow. You can't have it both ways."

"Don't I fucking know it?"

My laugh bubbles out of me without my consent. "You're ridiculous, J. I think it's ok if we pick up the pace a little bit." I press my body against his, my hands squeezing his towel-clad ass.

He looks down at me warily, his forehead scrunched with wrinkles. "Are we talking about the moving in part still or have you moved back onto sex?"

"Can't it be both?"

He swats my ass. "You told me it can't. Your rules."

"No, nu uh, J," I contradict. I poke him in the chest to drive my point home. "That's not the same. Your ideas contradicted each other. Mine complement each other. Living together would include sex. Right? Like lots and lots of sex. And I must admit, I'm not opposed to that. So....my calendar is looking pretty open for tomorrow after all."

He spins me around and backs me up into the dresser, hovering over me. "You're such a little shit all the time."

"Yeah, but you love it," I tease with a laugh.

"Mmm hmm," he agrees. "I might just love everything about you."

The minute the words register, we both freeze. He looks like a deer caught in headlights and the panicked look is endearing. I smile up at him as I rub a calming hand up and down his tense back. "Don't over think it, baby."

He presses me against his chest and places a kiss on my head, resting his cheek against my wet hair. After a quiet moment, he pulls away to look down at me and gives me a gentle kiss on my lips, his mouth still warm from the hot shower.

Sighing, he admits, "I think I've loved you since the first time I kissed you when we were 15." He's looking into my eyes as his thumb strokes across my cheek.

"I think I loved you since the first day I moved to the cul-de-sac when we were 8 and we played P-I-G."

A smirk overtakes his face and his hand moves down to circle my throat, his thumb again taking up the stroking motion against my skin. "And I totally beat you. I always beat you."

"Or maybe sometimes I just let you win," I offer, my eyebrow shooting up. "Maybe sometimes I want you to get the prize."

"Oh yeah? Like when? Like when we were 15 and I kissed you?" He nips at my lips, and I reach up to wrap my arms around his neck, my fingers finding their way into his damp hair.

"Maybe I hoped," I say quietly. I can feel my cheeks heat and I try to look away, but Jensen uses his thumb under my chin to force my attention to stay on him.

"Teddy," he asks, his blue eyes studying me, "how long have you liked me?"

"Awhile," I say with a sigh. "But I've never really admitted it to myself."

"Why's that?"

"Because it's you."

"What does that mean?" he demands gruffly. "Because it's me?"

"You know, J," I say, rolling of my eyes. "It's you. And me. It's us. We're friends. We've always been friends. It was confusing to think of you any other way. And you had to go and get hot. God I really hated realizing that. You know how hard it is to try and ignore how hot your best friend is?"

"I think I have a pretty good idea." His hand moves down my body until he's cupping my ass. "I've been mad at you for so many years now, Teddy. And at myself. Especially after New Year's Eve. Holy fuck, Teddy. How did that not mess you up?" He pauses to gauge my reaction, his grip firmer on my ass.

When I sigh, he continues, "But then we barely spoke and it was so awkward. I hated it. Really hated it. I didn't want to risk it again. I've been afraid of fucking everything up."

"We're so stupid, Jensen," I say, shaking my head. "We've been here this whole time. Wanting the same thing. Being scared of the same thing."

"I'm still scared, baby," he whispers. He ducks his head, burying his face in my neck as if the admission is too much. I can feel the words against my skin as he mumbles, "You mean too much to me to fuck it up, Teddy. Don't let me fuck it up, ok? Please don't let me fuck it up."

I fist my fingers into his hair with a tight grip, letting the quiet moment sit between us. I can feel his heart beating against my body, the quick rhythm matching my own.

The way he's clutching me, allowing his vulnerable side show, gives me a glimpse into the insecurities that are surely responsible for the pace that he's set for our relationship. He's battling two warring sides. An innate one that slips out during intimate moments: his raging desire for me, for us to be completely free of the restraints to let go with each other and simply chase the high of our bodies coming together.

The other side, though—the one that seems to always win—is his underlying fear of something going wrong. I get the feeling it runs deeper than just the scars from the aftermath of our drunken New Year's Eve together, though. It feels bigger than that. I suspect some other demon haunts him, and it's something he needs to face before we can truly move forward.

I scratch my nails gently across his scalp with a soothing pattern. His breath is hot on my neck as he moans his pleasure. After nibbling his way across my jaw, he straightens enough to look at me, his face level with mine. His cheeks are tinted pink, and I take in the sight of his obvious discomfort.

He doesn't like wading through uncomfortable moments, but he's here with me anyway, and a flash of warmth slithers through my body. I can be patient, allow him the time he needs.

His deep blue eyes roam my face as if he's trying to decipher meaning from my facial expressions alone. In response, I press a series of light kisses across his lips, starting at the right corner of his mouth and working to the left, continuing until I come to his ear. "You mean a lot to me, too, Jensen," I whisper. "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby." A smile crinkles the corners his eyes and I smooth my finger over the wrinkled skin, returning his smile.

When I wrap my arms around his neck, he stands to his full height, bringing me with him, leaving my feet to dangle a few inches off the floor. He twists us right and left a few times, his arms squeezed tightly around my middle before he sets me on my feet. Then his mouth is on mine, devouring it in a hungry kiss that has me falling back against the dresser in an ungraceful crash. It bumps against the wall, and we break apart with a laugh.

"Fuck, baby," Jensen laughs with his face in my neck again.

"Got a little excited, did ya, big guy?" I tease.

"With you," he says, straightening his body but not backing up to allow any space between us, "always."

I wiggle my eyebrows at him. "Always, huh?"

He chuckles roughly and presses his body harder into me, the handles of the dresser digging into my back.

"You know my siblings gave me so much shit about you, right? They called you my girl and how I need to grow a pair of balls and tell you how madly in love with you I am. And God they gave me so much shit about Ajax. By the way, I'm still mad at you about that. Why him? You knew I couldn't stand him." He growls into my ear and then scrapes his teeth roughly against my neck.

I shove him away, gaining some space between us, and I point my finger at him. "You only hated him because he asked me out. You liked him before that. I mean, you hired him. How bad can he be?"

Jensen folds his arms over his bare chest, narrowing his hooded eyes at me. "He's a jackoff. And he still flirts with you, that fucker! Do you think HR will let me fire him for trying to date my girl?"

I roll my eyes and laugh at his absurdity. "Pretty sure that's not a firing offense, Jensen."

"Figures."

"But you should ask HR," I say with a grin. "I bet Rylie would get a kick out of the request. Then blab it to your sisters. Imagine the text thread then! You'll have to let me read it. Or better yet, can I be added? Your family is crazy."

I turn around and open one of the drawers he unceremoniously gifted to me, and I rifle through the mess.

"You're not being added," he says gruffly behind me.

I turn back to face him and unwrap the towel from my body. We both watch it drop to the floor. "Why?" I ask, toeing the towel away and step into a pair of pink panties.

He tracks my movements, and he watches as I put on a bra, hiding my boobs from him.

"Because you're not," he says, his eyes glued to my chest. He runs a finger down the valley of my breasts before finally looking at me. "You don't need to read all the shit they say about me. They're little pricks sometimes. Besides, I can't talk about you if you're on there."

"Oh yeah?" I ask before stepping into a pair of tight jeans. "Talk about how great I am?"

"Or how annoying, more like." Before I can completely cover myself up with a shirt, he hauls my body to his and lowers his mouth to mine for a punishing kiss that leaves me breathless. He licks across my lips before pulling away.

"Whatever, Jensen," I say, a smirk slowly gracing my face. "You just told me you've loved me since you were 15. You're full of shit."

"Yeah, well," he says taking a few steps back from me, "you've loved me longer. So there."

Then he drops his towel, spins on his heels and gifts me with the sight of his naked ass as he sorts through the collection of t-shirts hanging up and selects a gray one with a faded American flag that I'm pretty sure he's had for well over a decade and wears it twice a year: Memorial Day and the 4th of July. He drapes it over his shoulder and turns back to me, smirking when he notices the direction of my eyes. "You ready for this, baby?"

"What? To match the awesomeness that is your festive shirt?" I tease, swatting his naked ass when he invades my space to grab a pair of jeans out of the dresser.

"Are you saying this shirt is safe from your thieving hands?"

"Well, once I live here, I won't need to take your shirts home. They'll just be in my closet for me to pick as I please."

"Our closet, baby. We'll share."

And fuck if I don't like the sound of that.