Hidden Secrets @SinaMW1209
Reviewer- @cwang1
Pros:
I really liked your cover! I could clearly see the title, and there wasn't any text that I couldn't see clearly. Overall, a really good job on your cover!
I really liked how you ended your blurb! It really made me question those secrets and how the Hufflepuff mentioned before related to it.
I really liked how you had a lot of banners and graphics and the cast. I think that really sets the stage for your story, and it makes the story more interesting to read.
Overall, your grammar was really good. Though there were a few mistakes, it didn't really affect the reader's experience, so good job on that!
I really liked how you described the characters through their actions. For example, I can tell that Snape's character lines up with his character in the books, as he acts a little cold and menacing.
Cons:
I didn't really like how you had a very stylish font in your blurb. While it does look nice, I can barely read it, so I would suggest changing the font to something that is a bit easier to read but still looks cool.
I thought that your blurb could perhaps be a little longer, as it is a bit on the short side right now. While I did like how you had dialogue, as that really helped the reader "zoom in" a scene, something that really makes me interested in your book.
I didn't really like how your writing was center-justified. It didn't really look nice, and it did seem a bit weird. I would suggest left-justifying it, as that is what is generally used.
I felt that you threw way too much information at the reader at once. Right in the beginning, the reader is trying to process a ton of information, and it just seems to keep coming at them. While I did like how you spaced out the paragraphs to allow the reader to process it easier, I would still suggest slowing the pace down.
I saw that you overused the comma sometimes, so I would suggest going back and checking this.
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