• mayura •

The water glides down my body, trickling down to the drain. My left wrist throbs, fortunately less painful, as I use to wash myself.

I caress the swelling with my fingertip, shuddering at the sharp pain shooting up my arm. It burns my skin, pricking me as though a million needles were poking me.

I whimper, biting my lips to supress the painful moans. My body trembles, tears pricking my eyes as I remember the altercations that had taken place a few hours earlier.

Vihaan's tight and painful grip, his dark expressions, strong and sharp tone, and -

"Answer me, Mayura."

- I sigh, resting my head against the wall. I can never forget it. His hate, his anger, his disappointment. In that very moment, I felt like he had lost all trust in me, like the threads connecting us had weakened to the point of breaking.

In that moment, my heart had nearly stopped beating. Every part of me was paralysed, my gut screaming at me to beg for forgiveness. To throw away my pride, my dignity, my self-respect and beg him on my knees. It transformed the happy moments I spent with dragon into dreadful ones.

I hiccup, a lone tear rolling down my cheek.

What if, if he starts to hate me?

What if he casts me away?

What if he finds another woman to love?

Another tear rolls down my cheek and I wipe them away.

I will apologize to him today!

But, but what should I say?

I'm sorry, Vihaan. I was angry that you broke our promise to go on a lunch date so I didn't come home on time.

No! I can't say that. If I say that, he'll learn. He'll know how vulnerable I am. He will know how weak, how needy and how starved for affection I am.

He will know that I am a weak woman.

'I like my woman strong, refined and mature.'

I am neither mature nor refined. If I let go of the only quality that attracts Vihaan, I will be... abandoned.

Again!

No, I don't want to abandoned.

I want to be loved too. Even a little bit of love, a morsel, a leftover, I will survive with it.

My heart aches, memories of my childhood haunting me. I've spent half my life all by myself. I don't want to do the same anymore.

It is very lonely and scary.

I want to live a normal life, just like the others. I want to be loved, cared and sought for too.

I also want the happiness of romance and companionship that they speak about, in movies and books.

My stomach tightens, my mouth feeling salty as I lean over the toilet bowl and retch out the meals of yesterday.

My anxiety is affecting my body.

Throwing up a second time, I flush the toilet bowl and quickly clean myself up, making sure that the pungent odour doesn't stick to me.

Brushing my teeth again, I wipe my face with the towel and step out of the room. Opening the door, I was about to move towards Vihaan's room, when I hear a creaking on my right.

I find Vansh on a chair by my door. His eyes droop close, body tilting towards the left. I rush to his side and kneel, letting his heavy body rest on me.

He opens his eyes at my touch, a sweet smile appearing on his lips. He shifts, cupping my face. "Good morning, my sweet darling." He greets, kissing my forehead. "Did you sleep well?"

"Why are you sleeping on a chair, Rai?" I ask, helping him stand. He stumbles, his legs numb from sitting for too long, holding the wall for support. He puts an arm around my shoulder, leaning on me. "I was guarding your room, bun."

"From whom? Ghosts? Lizards?" I chuckle, trying to lighten the atmosphere. At that moment, Vihaan walks out of his room. His eyes were tired, a bandage on his little finger.

How did he get hurt?

He walks towards us. He stretches his arm towards me, a small smile appearing on his face. Instantly, Vansh puts his arms around my shoulders and pulls me close, holding me protectively.

"I told you to stay away from her!" He warns, despite his condition. Vihaan groans, his smile faltering. He looks at me. I gulp, avoiding his gaze.

"Vansh," I turn to him and cup his face, glad that he loosens his hold on me. "Don't fight na. Vihaan apologized for his mistake."

His features soften momentarily as he registers my words. His eyebrows furrow, lips curving down in anger. He gazes at Vihaan, who was equally surprised at my statement, and then back at me.

Please don't catch my bluff!

"When? I was outside the whole time." He fumes.

"He came in through the terrace." I lie, taking a quick glance at Vihaan. "He said it was a mistake. It wasn't intentional and he won't do it again."

"You expect me to believe that?" Vansh scoffs, glaring at Vihaan, who was clueless.

"And, and he also said that he will work on his anger." I add in a hurry.

Vansh's anger diffuses, getting replaced by an instant expression of surprise. I gulp, hoping my lie had worked.

He immediately masks his expression with a stone cold face. "Regardless," he clicks his tongue. "since it didn't happen in front of my eyes, I'm not going to completely trust his apology."

He looks at me, his gaze and voice softening. "Unless I see him acting on his apology, and making changes in himself, I will not let him loiter around you, bun."

I nod a little, relieved that the differences between them had started to settle. "Jaan," Vihaan holds my finger, only to have his hand swatted away by Vansh. "Don't touch her!" He growls.

I sigh, chewing on my lower lip. If Angre was here, he would've ended their fight long ago. Hah, I wish he would have taught me that trick as well.

I lead Vansh to his room, helping him lie down on his bed. Snuggling into the pillow, he holds my hand, "Stay here, bun." He demands in a sleepy tone. "Don't be with Vihaan. He is not nice."

And I still love him, despite his actions.

Vansh falls asleep in a few minutes, and I run my hand through his thick black hair. Vihaan's hair is softer compared to Vansh.

Confirming that Vansh was deep asleep, I move out of his room to grab something to eat, only to collide with Vihaan. I slip, reaching out for the table for support when he wraps his arm around my waist tightly. Helping me stand, he caresses my cheek.

I missed his touch.

"Follow me, love." He whispers, gently holding my fingers and leading me towards the main hall. Passing through his room, I notice his boxing gloves lying below the boxing bag and a sweat stain, mixed with blood, on the carpet.

Ah! So that's how he hurt his hand.

As he moves towards the island, I move towards the cabinet in the corner, taking out the first aid kit. He is seated on the stool and I quickly take the opportunity to nurse his wound.

Taking the stool beside him, I place the box on the table and take his hand. I realise then that it was a cloth, stained with blood, wrapped around his finger and not a bandage. Biting my lower lip, I undo it, swallowing hard at the blood.

He is the one who is injured, yet I am the one who feels the extreme pain. I feel my tears build up in my eyes, only to be wiped away by him. He wipes them away with his thumb.

"Jaan, I am absolutely fine. Don't cry!" He soothes, making me angry.

This is not fine, Vihaan! You've literally got a huge cut between your fingers. It's bleeding heavily, and I can see a bit of the bone as well. You've fractured your finger also!

I grit my teeth, humming as a response. Keeping his hand carefully on my lap, I open the box and put some antiseptic on the cotton. "Hey, I'm really alright. You don't have to do this." He says, retracting his hand.

I grab his wrist, put his hand on my lap and begin to dab it over the wound, gently blowing it to reduce the burn. Putting a thick layer of cotton on it, I bandage his ring and little finger together, throwing away the used items and tucking the box back in place.

My alarm rings and I go to my room to turn it off. A notification pops up, reminding me that today was the day I leave for Bangalore. Opening my contacts list, I contact dragon and, balancing the phone between my ear and shoulder, I take out my duffel bag from the cupboard.

"Morning, princess." He yawns.

"Morning, dragon." I whisper.

"Batao, itni subah kaise yaad kiya mujhe?" He giggles.

"Do you know a good doctor?" I ask, dumping my old clothes into the laundry basket and pull out a fresh pile, carefully putting them in the travel bag. "Woh actually, Vihaan has cut his finger. Stitches lagenge. Shayad fracture bhi hua hai."

"Don't worry, princess. I will send the best doctor over right now." He reassures, cutting the call. Placing my phone to a side, I hasten my packing.

✎

I drop my duffel bag to the ground, my stomach growling in hunger, when the doorbell rings.

Vihaan rises, but I beat him to it and unlock the door. A man stands on the other side, wearing a white coat, holding a bag. A surgical mask covers his face. I can only see his eyes.

And those eyes, I see them a lot.

He winks at me, whispering into my ear. "Happy now, princess?"

Dragon!!

I grin, nodding at him. "Who is it, Mayu?" Vihaan asks, moving from his seat. "This way, please." I guide dragon towards the hall.

Vihaan was by the sofa, his eyebrows furrowed in suspicion. Holding him the by the shoulders, I make him sit on the sofa. The doctor takes a seat on his left, undoing his bandage. There was a fleet of surprise in his eyes before he composed himself and opened his medical kit.

"Please bear with me. I need to stitch up your wound." He says, drawing out the syringe of anesthesia.

I notice a glass of chilled milkshake and a bowl of ice cream fruit salad on the table. My stomach growls, much to my embarrassment.

I flicker my gaze down for a second, unknowingly meeting Vihaan's. He smiles a bit, encouraging me to have those. I obey, not wanting to starve myself.

The milkshake was soft and creamy, melting in my mouth and bringing relief to my hungry stomach. In the moment of satisfaction, I find myself devouring the salad too.

I put down the empty vessels in the sink, feeling full. He takes out a wooden pad, writing down a prescription for Vihaan.

His ring and little finger were bandaged together tightly. "Don't move your fingers for a few days." He says, tearing out the prescription for him. "These are antibiotics, will help in reducing the infection. This is a painkiller. And this one is if you catch a fever. Three days later, go to the hospital and get your stitches removed. Since you have fractured your little finger, it's best for it to be in a plaster for a month."

Vihaan nods, pretending to be an obedient man. But I know well that that prescription will go down in the bin along with the trash.

Dragon leaves. Before Vihaan can say anything to me, I grab my duffel bag and helmet, slipping on my shoes and escort the doctor outside. Standing by the gate, I ask him for another detailed copy of the prescription.

"Thank you so much, dragon!"

"Anything for you, princess." He smiles, driving away in his car.

Leaving my bike near the gate, I walk down to three houses on my right, where Rohit lives. He is sitting on a chair in the front yard, reading a newspaper. On noticing me, he puts it away and rushes to the gate.

"Good morning, madam." He greets.

"Morning, Rohit." I pass him the prescription. "Vihaan's not going to follow this. But you must make sure he does. Okay?"

"Surely, madam." He smiles. "I will purchase these medicines right away."

"Take him to the hospital three days later. He needs to get a plaster."

Rohit's eyes widen in shock. "Is he that hurt? I mean, as you wish, madam."

"I want it to be done. Even if he whines or makes excuses, drag him to the hospital. And make sure he doesn't use his left hand until it's healed."

Rohit nods, turning back to his seat. I turn away to my bike and drive away to Bangalore.

✎

I knock on the wooden door, taking off my helmet.

Getting no reply, I push it open and step in. Dropping my shoes and helmet by the door, I sit on the edge of the bed, with a water bowl and a soft towel. "Sweetheart."

Riddhima hums, shifting her head to my lap, a sweet smile on her lips. I run my fingers through her head, pressing a kiss to the side of her forehead. Dipping the towel in water, I squeeze out the excess and wipe her face.

"Mhm, Di." She whines, pouting cutely. "Sone do na."

I decide to tease her by sprinkling some drops of water. She whines like a child, and I continue to tease her. Frustrated, she sits up and wraps her arms around my shoulders, her face buried in the crook of my neck.

"Okay, fine, sweetheart." I give in. "I won't disturb you. Chaliye, abh uth jaiye. Khana nahi karna kya aapko?"

"Pasta! Mujhe pasta khana hai." She demands, completely awake. I nod, giving in to her demand.

"Theek hai! Par pehle aap fresh ho jao."

Throwing away the blanket, she runs around the room to collect her clothes and jumps into the bathroom. I chuckle at her antics. Cleaning up her room, I disinfect her bed.

Taking out a sweater from her closet, I leave it on the bed for her to wear and go to the kitchen, to make pasta for her.

Riddhima runs out, throwing her wet towel on the bed stand. She frowns, staring at the sweater. "Nahi pehen na."

"Aap bimar ho. Agar aur bimar hona hai toh mat peheniye."

She pouts. "Bahut khujli karta hai yeh."

"Koi na. Thodi der ke liye pehen lijiye. Shaam ko naya khareedne chalenge."

"Okay!" She gleams, throwing over the sweater and sits down on the chair, excited for lunch. I take out the thermometer, checking her temperature.

It was nearly normal. Just a day or two more to go.

Plating the pasta, I hand it to her, keeping the vessel for second servings.

"Di, main na aapke aur bhaiya ke saath padhungi. Mujhe nahi rehna yahan." She pout cutely before going back to her favourite pasta.

"Theek hai." I have also been thinking about this for long.

"Par abhi nahi. Pehle mere 10th boards khatam hone do, phir mein aaungi."

I smile.

Riddhima speaks throughout, rambling about everything she's done in the week. I nod, sometimes smiling and giggling, but not speaking once.

If I am to speak, dark secrets would be revealed.

I take a closer notice of Riddhima.

Her brown doe eyes were glistening in excitement.

Similar to Vansh.

Once she starts to talk, there's no telling when she will stop.

Just like Vansh.

She loves pasta. And anything I cook.

Just like Vansh.

She feels safe around me, and can even be vulnerable around me.

Just like Vansh.

I supress a chuckle, realising the various similarities between Vansh and Riddhima. I'm sure, that if these two meet, they'd become the greatest of friends. Or even lovers.

And probably replace me, with each other, in their lives.

A pang of sadness strikes me but I ignore it. Even if they were to replace me, I wouldn't mind.

Riddhima takes the second serving, grating some cheese on top. Once done, I wash the dishes and, wiping my hands, I hand her the medicine.

"Nahi." She declines, acting like a child.

"Aakhri hai. Isske baad aapko aur nahi khaana." I assure.

"Pakka na?"

"Ji," I smile, nodding at her. She grins, gulping down the medicine with a glass of water.

"Kadwa hai," she complains, lying down on her bed.

Talking for another hour, she finally falls asleep.

Riddhima, I'm so sorry for destroying your life.

[2780]