Chapter 01

1 Sep

Dear Diary,

Sometimes I pretend to be okay,
Sometimes I fake a smile.
Sometimes I bury the unwanted feelings,the sadness i can't explain, not because I want to fool myself into thinking that i am happy.
Sometime crying doesn't make me weak and continuing to cry all night doesn't either.

I spent eighteen year accepting the significance only I seem to notice, everytime I face the mirror and finding myself falling into pieces and I hate it, because every single breathing human knows that recollecting your pieces together take much time then it does to fall apart.

Sometimes my thinking broke me and make me felt like, I'm the one who start creating the mess up in my own life, I'm the one who myself broke myself apart.

I wake up everyday without even having time to breathe (or choke) on the polluted air that surrounds me and sometimes I find myself thinking that maybe things could be different if I hadn't heard footsteps of my father leaving my life when I was nine; or my sister didn't call me a compulsive liar every rare moment I tell her that I love her but I hadn't heard it back from her any way and a part of me always, always craved to hear it back.

Now things end up happening, I learn that Don't pretend or feel anything else, Just let it out, let it now.

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