"She says nothing at all, but simply stares upward into the dark sky and watches, with sad eyes, the slow dance of the infinite stars."
~Neil Gaiman, Stardust

Lilly

"Focus, Lilly! What's wrong with you today?" Killian asked. "Are you hurting from your injuries?"

"No, it's not that. Those healed a while ago," I replied, placing the weights down. "I'm just... frustrated by things. I'm sorry. I'm not meaning to make things difficult for you."

"You're making things difficult for yourself, not me," he said gently. "Why don't you take the day off? Sort out whatever's bothering you. Besides, have you gotten an outfit for the party tomorrow?"

"What party?"

"You don't know?"

"No? Maybe I didn't get invited to it?"

"You were definitely invited. I talked to Caleb about it." Killian appeared genuinely perplexed by the whole situation.

"Whose party is it?"

"Esmeralda's."

"Maybe I should talk to Esmeralda?" I suggested.

"Yeah, go talk to her. And seriously, take the day off. Your progress, despite what you believe, is going well. It won't hinder your development if you miss a day. I'll let the others know. Just have more faith in yourself about this, all right? I'll see you tomorrow."

I thanked Killian and hurried to my apartment. My kittens were waiting for me on their new playscape provided by Dylan. He'd taken a fancy to Toulouse, making me wonder if that was because the cat's fur matched the color of his fire.

They followed me into my bathroom, where I hurriedly showered and got dressed before going to talk to Esmeralda. I wanted to look put together on the outside even though I was a mess internally. I remembered a quote I once heard: "It's important to look your best when you feel your worst." I certainly was feeling down in the dumps right now, but those thoughts could wait. I needed to figure out what this party was I'd been invited to that I didn't know about.

I made my way to the Queen's apartment, knocking on her door. A guard opened it, asking, "Do you have an appointment?"

"No, but it has something to do with her party tomorrow?" I replied, feeling slightly embarrassed. For all I knew, she could be in the middle of deciding the fate of this planet while I worried about a stupid party.

"Gregory, let her in. Lilly is always welcome. She may be the future ruler of this country for all we know," Esmeralda insisted. Gregory moved aside, allowing me entrance into the Queen's sweeping, luxurious living room. Esmeralda sat on the couch, reading some papers. She smiled kindly. "What can I do for you, darling? I thought you were in training?"

"Killian gave me the rest of the day off. He, uh, brought up a party and said I should be getting ready for it. Apparently, I was invited, but I have no idea what he's talking about," I confessed. "If I'm not invited, it's totally okay. I'm not much of a party person anyway, so-"

"You're most certainly invited," Esmeralda cut me off, looking confused. "I wonder why you didn't get your invitation. Do you have something to wear?"

"I don't know."

"It's black tie, so a nice cocktail dress or floor-length gown will do."

"I'll check my closet when I get back. I should have something, but if I don't?"

"Then I'll have Iris help you find a dress. She loves shopping for dresses."

"What's the party for exactly?"

"My two-thousandth birthday."

"Your two..." I trailed off, not just in shock by her age, but also by knowing from Caleb that two-thousand was old on this planet. Not many people lived to be her age. It was kind of like hitting one-hundred and ten on Earth. It was almost unheard of.

"I know, I can't believe I've hit that age myself," Esmeralda chuckled.

"I want to age as gracefully as you," I blurted, cringing inwardly the moment the words left my mouth. Trying to hide my embarrassment, I said, "I'll check my closet, and I'll call Iris if I need help."

"Wonderful! I look forward to you being there." Esmeralda studied me carefully. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," I replied casually. "Why?"

"You seem quiet. I won't pretend I know you well, but from what I do, you seem quieter than usual."

"I'm just tired. Between training and learning everything I can, I've probably been running myself down."

"Don't run yourself down too much. You need to be at the top of your game next week."

"Why? What's next week?"

"It's a surprise of sorts. If I didn't have to go over this report, I'd chat longer, but this requires my immediate attention. Would you like to have dinner soon?"

"I'd love to, Your Majesty."

"Please, it's Esmeralda to you. I'll let you know when my schedule is clear, and we can get to know each other without others listening in."

"I look forward to it. Thank you for all your help." I waved goodbye and hastily returned to my apartment, beelining for my closet. I stared at its contents. The transporters brought everything, including all my fancy dresses. I zeroed in on one flaming red in color with a thin, sparkling, bedazzled strap going over the shoulder with matching strips of fabric on the torso. It was fit at the top but loosened just below the hips. A little sexy, but still classy. I paired it with black peep-toe stilettos before I approved of the outfit enough to shift my attention to dinner. I decided to skip eating in the dining area. I had leftovers from yesterday.

By yesterday, I mean from the wee hours of today when I got hungry and bought a pizza.

I ate a couple of slices, quickly feeling full. I didn't eat as much anymore, which surprised me. Back on Earth, I was always getting random cravings, especially at night. Not so much here. Maybe because I was exercising a lot more, or perhaps it was due to my bodily changes from being on Vasileia.

With a full stomach, I thought I'd be tired enough to turn in early, but that wasn't the case. Instead, I found myself wide awake. Since sleep wouldn't be coming anytime soon, I made a cup of hot chocolate and went to the rooftop garden with a book in hand. People rarely came here, which I didn't mind. It was like my own little, secret haven.

Unsurprisingly, no one was up there. I took a seat on the cushy bubble-swing next to the small, fish-filled (were they fish?) pond underneath the willow tree and opened my book. For a while, the chapters flew by, and before I knew it, I was halfway through the book. But it was near this point my concentration wandered elsewhere, and my eyes drifted to the stars.

It dawned on me I'd been on Vasileia for three months without so much as an inkling to knowing my power. I started to believe I had no power and that some terrible mistake had been made. Maybe they'd mistaken me for a different Lilly Snow. Perhaps it was a coincidence that Vivienne's roommate had the same name as the one in the prophecy. It'd be a hell of a coincidence, but it was possible...

I was grasping at straws now, but I've always tried rationalizing things, particularly about the direction my life had taken. In comparison to Vivienne, my life was a mess. She had her powers, a job, even the possibility of a future boyfriend. How she'd gotten through to grumpy-cat Chad was beyond me, but she'd managed it. They'd been hanging out almost every day. I rarely saw her now because if she wasn't at work, she was with him or sleeping. I missed her, I needed my best friend to vent to, but I didn't want to rain on her parade. She dealt with enough problems working in the hospital with the constant flow of injured people, some of which were gruesome. Vivienne didn't need my issues added to her plate, nor did she need her free time occupied by something so dreary.

I considered Caleb. He'd proven himself multiple times that he could be trusted. He'd shown he cared for me, especially after the crash, but I knew he was beating himself up over not discovering my power yet, and I didn't want to add insult to injury by bringing up my insecurities. If I did, he'd probably never sleep until he figured it out, and he didn't sleep enough already. Caleb runs on caffeine...

Dylan was another candidate, but I suspected he had issues keeping things to himself. My gut said if I told him my secret, it'd somehow make its way to Caleb, Vivienne, or both, and I wanted to avoid either of them finding out. On the other hand, Dylan was good at cheering me up. His happy-go-lucky demeanor always lifted my spirits.

I thought of Esmeralda. She'd taken an interest in me like no one else here, except for Shane, but she was a queen with a planet to run. To think Vivienne or I was one day going to be her successor? It was a lot to take in. The last thing Esmeralda needed was the worries of a newbie.

Lastly, there was Shane. The smug, charming, handsome, egotistical bastard. If he didn't have such psychopathic tendencies, I might actually like him. He'd taken a bizarre interest in me, trying to talk to me whenever he could. While I know he'd absolutely love to know what's going on inside my head, I knew it was the worst possible idea to let him in. Thankfully we just saw each other at mealtimes because Shane only trained with Chad and only allowed when Chad, Dylan, or Caleb could escort him. Caleb avoided this as much as possible, using his lab as an excuse. He said there's no way in hell he was letting Shane in there. So, it was mainly Chad and Dylan watching over him. Dylan treated him the same as he treated everyone else. Still, even I saw the wariness in his eyes towards the elder Calhoun. I visibly saw how Chad tried to steer Shane from having any interaction with Vivienne, but that proved challenging at mealtimes, considering we all ate together.

I wished I had my mom to talk to right now, but she was galaxies away with no idea her daughter was on another planet and the subject of a prophecy. I didn't even have a boyfriend to talk to. If I did, I imagined he'd be walking up the stairs to the rooftop garden to find me, knowing I'm trying to find peace and quiet from the world. He'd sit down with me, and I'd lean against his chest and tell him everything going on in my mind. He'd listen, maybe have some advice, maybe not, and make me laugh, lifting my spirits in a way no one else could.

But I had no boyfriend. I had no one looking for me right now. Despite having so many people in my life, I suddenly felt incredibly alone. I had no superpower, I wasn't a super genius.

I was just me.

It'd been okay on Earth because I knew that despite not having things others did, I also knew I had things many others didn't. I knew there was always going to be someone prettier or wealthier or smarter or more charming than me. But here on Vasileia, I felt everyone here had everything I didn't, that I was inferior to all of them. I had no place being here. I had no place on a planet full of superhumans with a war to fight. I had nothing to offer them, to help them, so what use was I to them?

My DNA might be the same as theirs, but maybe something had gone wrong. Perhaps I was a Squib like Filch was in Harry Potter or the Sight like Sophie in the Infernal Devices- aware of all the power around me but unable to possess it myself.

I didn't belong here, but I had to act like it. As much as I believed in free will and the ability to choose where you go in life, I also believe certain things happen for a reason. This had to be one of those things because I know I didn't choose this path.

My Vasileian phone vibrated, breaking me out of my anxiety-induced, self-pitied thoughts. It was from Caleb, asking if I was okay since I wasn't at dinner. I replied I was fine, despite the wrenching in my heart telling me otherwise. I explained I had leftovers in my fridge and didn't want to waste them. My answer was at least partially true. There were a brief few moments where no response was received, and I figured he'd gotten his answer. But then he messaged me back.

Caleb: Want to join Dylan, Chad, Viv, Iris, and me for ice cream?

I wanted to be alone, but I'd just continue thinking all the negative thoughts if I did, which wouldn't do anything for anyone, especially me.

Lilly: Count me in. Be down in a sec.

I dashed downstairs to the lobby, where my friends waited for me. Caleb lit up as I approached. "Hey! Glad you came. You ready to go?"

"Lead the way," I said. We set off for dessert, and in that moment, I realized that while I didn't have everything they did, whether that be superpowers or superintelligence, I still belonged to their group. They saw something in me that I didn't see myself, but something that I needed to.