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chapter sixty: up in flames
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      THE LOW HUM OF THE FALCON'S engines makes it difficult for Indira to keep herself awake, lulling her into a heavy-eyed trance. Her head bobs, dipping downwards before snapping back up as she blinks rapidly to chase away the ebbing tides of sleep that have been threatening to wash over her for the past several hours. They're still soaring through the abyss of hyperspace, fleeing from the sanctuary that Yavin IV had provided for the Resistance and leaving the little jungle moon behind; a prospect that saddens Indira more than she had thought it would. It shouldn't come as a surprise to her — she has learned over time to anticipate all things good and nice in her life coming to an abrupt end — but this loss stings, nonetheless. Even in her grief-stricken state, Yavin IV had felt like a safe place to land; a hurricane's eye in the raging storm of an endless war. More than that, though, Yavin had felt like home.

      Indira hasn't felt that way in a very long time.

      From her place at the Dejarik table, she can see the grim expressions of her fellow Resistance fighters as they fill in the empty spaces left in the freighter's main hold. Only a few people aren't amongst them — Snap and Karé, Snap's parents, and a few others who'd taken separate ships — and with their allies from Yavin IV no longer mixed in with their ranks, Indira is reminded of just how few of them there are left. Hours ago, the sullen faces surrounding her had been smiling, laughing, dancing — the happiest she'd seen most of them in months — but all that joy had seemingly vanished, going up in flames with the Yavin colony.

     Her eyes burn as she tries to blink the memories away, flames flickering across her vision. Indira can still smell the smoke and it makes her shiver before she pulls the blanket around her shoulders tighter and rests her head on Kali's shoulder, doing her best not to jostle her friend, who had fallen asleep with a hand in Jessika's hair as the other girl snored quietly in her lap.

      Part of Indira wants to join them in the oblivion that unconsciousness would surely provide, yet she can't allow herself to rest; not when she still doesn't know if they're actually safe. They should be, now that they're in hyperspace, but Indira is hesitant to believe that. After all, Yavin IV had seemed safe and they'd allowed themselves to get too comfortable there. That was a mistake that the Resistance couldn't afford to make again. Not when their numbers are so scarce and they'd barely managed to escape with their lives.

      "Kylo Ren — he's done something terrible," Rey says, choking on a sob. "He saw where we are. He knows we're here. We have to go, now, before it's too late."

      And then it's chaos.

      People begin shouting and screaming as they clamber over one another in their haste to disappear. Indira's first thought is to find her mother. "Mama!" She cries, elbowing her way through the crowd to reach her. She clings to her mother's hands like a frightened child when she finds her, ignoring the sound of Leia barking orders over the din.

      "Soldiers, ready yourselves for evacuation and report back here in five minutes. Take what you can carry; leave everything else behind. Pilots, come and see me. I'll assign you to your ships," the general commands.

     Her aunt turns to Poe's father. "Kes, you know the plan we discussed. Take everyone from the compound to the old Jedi temple and hide yourselves in the catacombs. They won't think to look for you there and once they realize that we're gone, it should draw them away from this place."

      Indira tightens her grip on her mother's hand. "Come on, Mama, I have to get you to safety —" she says, but her mother stops and shakes her head.

      "No, sweet girl," Jana replies with a sad smile. "You have to leave."

      Indira freezes in her tracks. "No," she breathes, shaking her head back and forth. "Not again. I won't leave you!"

      "Only until the war ends, right?" Her mother asks, repeating words that Indira had spoken to her months ago. "Isn't that what you told me the last time we said goodbye?"

     "I can't," Indira struggles to get the words out, terror making her chest feel tight; as if freezing water has filled her lungs. She can't leave her mother behind — not after she'd lost ... not after her father had just — no, she can't allow that to happen. "What if you — what if we never — Mama, I can't!"

      Her mother cups her face in her hands, cradling her cheeks between her warm palms. "Breathe, sweetheart," Jana coaches, gentle and calm. Indira does her best to listen, inhaling and exhaling shakily. "Just breathe. We will see each other again — I know it in my bones," she promises, pressing a kiss to Indira's forehead. "This isn't goodbye forever."

       Indira's face crumples. "I can't do this without you —"

       Someone sets a hand on her mother's shoulder. "Jana, we need to leave," Kes Dameron says quietly, his expression regretful as he looks between the two of them. "We've got a long walk ahead of us."

      Jana nods, waving him off subtly before returning her focus to her daughter. "Indira, listen to me," she says firmly, smoothing some of the flyaway hairs back from her face. "I am going to be just fine, sweet girl, and so are you. And when all of this is over, we will find each other — no matter how many stars and skies are between us — and we won't ever have to be apart again. Do you hear me?"

       Her limbs feel like lead. "Mama —"

      "I promise, Indira, we are going to make it through this." Her mother pulls her into a fierce embrace. "I love you so much, my brave girl. And I will find you on the other side of the war."

      Indira can't say the words back; nor can she make herself let go. She clings to her mother for as long as she can until a hand tugs on her shoulder and she's torn from her mother's embrace; unable to do anything but watch as her fleeting form disappears into the forest with Kes and the others from the colony. Kali and Jessika steer Indira away, guiding her in the opposite direction towards where the Falcon is waiting.

      It feels like the world is spinning in slow motion. Indira sees Snap and Karé hoisting themselves into their X-wings; their wedding all but forgotten as they strap themselves into their cockpits and pull their helmets onto their heads. Norra and Wedge Antilles follow close behind them, making a beeline for their ship. Up ahead, Lando Calrissian is ushered onto the Falcon by Chewbacca and several of the other troopers follow after them, hurrying up the ramp and into the ship's main hold.

     A flash of silver and bronze catches her eye and Indira realizes that it's EV-1 following close beside her. She stops in her tracks as Jess and Kali continue to run, shaking her head at the little droid. "Evie, you should go with my mom," Indira shouts over the chaos. "She needs you more than I do."

      EV-1 lets out a string of anxious beeps and Indira makes a sound that is a cross between a laugh and a sob. "I know what your primary function is," she says, wiping her nose. "I programmed you myself, remember? But my mom —"

     The droid cuts her off again, stubbornly refusing to leave her side, and Indira both loves and hates her for it.

     She doesn't have time to argue with EV any further, though. Bright lights flash overhead as a squadron of enemy ships appear. Indira knows then that they're out of time — the First Order has officially found them. Gunfire and explosives rain down from the sky and in an instant, the compound goes up in flames. Indira watches as the world catches fire around her, eating up homes and vegetation alike. She feels a lump in her throat when she spots Kes Dameron's house — the home he built from the ground up with his wife to share with their son — burning like kindling. Yet that feeling pales in comparison to the anguish that washes over her when she catches sight of the great Force-sensitive Uneti tree with its leaves aflame and branches blazing white-hot.

     "Indira!" Kali screams from inside the Falcon. "What are you doing? We have to go!"

      Her eyes sting and Indira isn't sure if it's from smoke or tears. She feels stuck to the spot until someone runs up behind her, grabbing her by the hand. "Come on, sweetheart," Poe mutters, pulling her along with him. "We've gotta leave."

     Indira stumbles after him, feeling dazed as she trips up the ramp of the Falcon. The second her feet cross the threshold of the ship, the door slams shut and seals them off from the outside world. Poe doesn't wait around to talk, barreling past Kali and Jessika as he sprints in the direction of the cockpit.

     Seconds later, the ship begins to rise from the ground and in a blink, they're gone — vanishing into the abyss of hyperspace without a trace.

      That had been several hours ago and there had been no news since, leaving Indira with nothing but her worries to keep her company. Thoughts of her mother and the others from Yavin fill her with dread. She wonders if they're safe, if they're alive — or if they'd paid the ultimate price by allying themselves with the Resistance. That thought alone makes her stomach twist so abruptly that Indira thinks she might be sick. She bites her tongue and chokes down bile, pressing her palms into the sockets of her eyes and breathing deeply to keep the nausea at bay.

     Heavy footsteps echo through the corridor adjacent to the cockpit before a familiar figure enters the main hold. Indira sits up a little straighter, observing Poe's weary appearance. He looks tired and Indira imagines that she doesn't look much better. Even so, she'd be lying to herself if she said the sight of him doesn't make her feel the tiniest bit less shitty.

     "Any word from the others?" Indira asks, rising from her seat to cross the room and stand closer to him so her voice doesn't wake the sleeping passengers.

     Poe nods, rubbing the back of his neck. "I finally heard back from my dad. Hiding in the temple worked — he and your mom and the rest of them are safe," he says and it feels like a weight has left Indira's shoulders. "Leia was right; the Order cleared out once they realized we were gone — which means they're probably looking for us — but at least the others are okay."

     "Yeah," Indira agrees softly, tugging at the necklace around her neck out of habit. "That's good news."

     Something flickers across his face before he shrugs. "It's about as a good as we could hope for," Poe mutters, brow furrowing and mouth curling downwards. "But ..." he swallows thickly, "there wasn't much for them to go back to when they left the temple. The compound is nothing but ruins now. Only a few houses were spared from the fire. Everything else is just ... gone, so they're gonna take up residence in the temple while they try to rebuild."

     "Shit," she murmurs, touching his shoulder hesitantly. "I'm so sorry, Poe. I saw your dad's house —"

      He rubs a hand over his face, forcing a smile onto his lips. "It's just a house," he says, shrugging off her concern. "What matters is that everyone is okay."

      Indira gets the sense that he wants to change the subject, so she doesn't press any further. "What about Snap and Karé? Have you heard anything from them?"

      Poe nods again. "They're safe, too," he reassures her. "Headed for Akiva to lay low on Wedge and Norra's farm till we figure out where our rendezvous point is going to be."

      A sigh escapes her lips before she offers him a tentative smile. "Well, at least they'll get to have something of a honeymoon," Indira jokes and it wins a real laugh from Poe; one that crinkles his eyes and softens the hardened lines of his face.

      "Yes, way to find the silver lining, Beren," he agrees.

      "You know me," she replies, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Passionate optimist. Always the type to see the glass as half-full instead of half-empty."

      Poe rolls his eyes. "Right. How could I forget?" He asks mockingly before his brow furrows. "Speaking of being half-empty: we need to refuel. I was hoping Leia would be here so I could talk to her about where we should set our course for. Lando thinks he knows a place where we can load up on supplies and allow ourselves to get spotted without being in too much danger — just to throw the Order off our trail."

     "I think Leia is still with Rey," Indira informs him, sobering up quickly. "She and Finn haven't left her side."

     "Kriff," Poe mutters, rubbing his forehead. "I've never seen Rey like that before. Poor kid was terrified."

      Indira bites her lip. "What she said about Ren ..." her voice trails off. "What do you think it means?"

      His face darkens at the mention of the masked man. "I don't know, but it can't mean anything good," he admits, frowning deeply. "What I don't get is how it was so easy for him to find us."

      "Because he'd been there before," a third voice interrupts.

     Indira and Poe spin around quickly, finding Leia standing just behind them. "Wha —" Poe begins, but Leia shakes her head, cutting him off.

     "Not here," she mutters, gesturing for them to follow her into the crew quarters.

      There, inside the dimly lit room, Indira catches her first glimpse of Rey since leaving Yavin IV. The young Jedi is fast asleep on one of the bunks, curled into a ball with her knees tucked into her chest like a child. One of her hands is outstretched, reaching for Finn, who is sitting on the edge of the mattress near the head of the bed; his fingers entwined with hers.

     "General," Poe says as soon as the door shuts behind him, his voice low. "What do you mean he'd been there before?"

      Leia looks exhausted, shoulders slumping as she takes a seat on one of the empty bunks. "Poe," she begins, pinching the bridge of her nose. "There's something you should know about Ren."

      His gaze narrows. "Tell me."

      A heavy exhale leaves Leia's lips and Indira knows what her aunt is going to tell him. "Ren knew Yavin Four when he saw it in Rey's mind because he'd been there before when he was a boy," Leia says, her voice wavering slightly as she holds the gaze of her protégé. "His parents brought him there while they were visiting old friends from their Rebellion days — friends who had a son of their own, around the same age — and the parents hoped that the boys might become friends someday, too."

     Something dawns in Poe's eyes before he starts to shake his head. "No," he mutters under his breath. "No, you can't mean —"

     "That friendship never came to pass," Leia continues, eyes glistening with unshed tears, "because as the boys grew older, their paths diverged. One of them went on to train at the Hosnian flight academy to become a pilot; the other was sent away by his parents to learn the ways of the Jedi from his uncle —"

      "He's your son?" Poe hisses, his voice harsh as he cuts her off. "Ben is Kylo Ren?"

      Leia nods, guilt and shame written across her face. "I'm sorry. I should have told you sooner," she says apologetically. "I just didn't know how —"

     "So you lied to me and everyone else for years?" He scoffs. "You kept it a secret that it was your son who captured and tortured me? That it was your son who tried to kill every person on this ship and murdered countless others? That it was your son who this Resistance — made of people who admire, believe, and trust in you — has been fighting against the whole time?"

      Leia flinches almost imperceptibly and Indira steps forward. "Poe," she says quietly. "Give her a break —"

      "Did you know?" He demands, whirling on her.

      Indira inhales sharply, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth before she finally admits, "Yes, I knew."

      A bitter smile twists at the corners of his mouth. "Of course you did. Secrets and lies must run in the family."

      Her eyes narrow. "Hey —"

      "And you, too?" Poe accuses Finn, who had remained silent thus far.

      The younger man nods guiltily and Poe lets out a humorless laugh. "Right. I was the only one who didn't know," he concludes. "Despite the fact that I knew him before all of this."

       "Poe, if you could just let me explain," Leia tries. "Everything that I did, I did for —"

       "No," he snarls, cutting her off. "You're a liar and a fraud and I can't even look at you right now."

      The words might as well have been a slap across the face. Leia's mouth snaps shut so hard that Indira hears the sound of her teeth clicking together as she clenches her jaw tight, keeping her chin held high. Yet her expression remains almost unchanged; her face a mask of cool indifference despite Poe's harsh words.

      The pilot shakes his head in disgust, turning on his heel. "I need some air."

      HE'S IN THE COCKPIT of the Falcon, watching the blue lights of hyperspace flicker across the dash of the ship when she finds him. Poe had sent Chewie and Lando off to get some rest a while ago, leaving him to stew in his anger all by himself until the door of the cockpit slid open. He doesn't bother turning to look at who has joined him; Poe knows who it is even before she slips into the empty seat next to him and asks, "Need a co-pilot?"

      Poe lets out a grunt. "If I did, I wouldn't ask you."

     "Well, I've never been much of a pilot," Indira concedes, not rising to the bait. "So that's probably good judgement on your part."

      Poe almost smiles before he catches himself, remembering why he's so mad. Though most of his anger is directed towards Leia, he can't forget that his friends had known the truth that she hid from him as well. Poe had only known Ben Solo for a short time when they were children — they were little more than strangers, in all honesty — but he'd still known him. To think that the awkward, gangly little kid he'd met back on Yavin years ago and chased around the roots of the Uneti tree was the same person who'd torn Poe's brain apart and left him shattered felt like a betrayal; especially when his childhood home had been burned to the ground as a consequence.

      He crosses his arms over his chest. "Go away."

      Indira sighs. "Would you let me say something to you one time — and then you'll never have to hear it again?" She asks, her voice soft and sweet as she uses Poe's own words against him. "Please?"

      He shoots her a look out of the corner of his eye and finds her big brown eyes wide and warm and pleading and damn it he can't say no to her. "One time," Poe warns. "Only one."

     Her expression changes instantly; big eyes and pouting lips morphing into something more serious. "You should talk to Leia," she says bluntly, cutting to the chase, and he feels a little duped for falling for the easiest trick in the book.

      Poe scowls. "Why? So she can lie to me some more?"

     "So she can explain things to you," Indira corrects him. "You didn't even give her the chance."

      A thousand retorts sit on the tip of his tongue before he clamps his mouth shut. "How about you explain first?" He asks. "I haven't forgotten that you were in on it, too. How long have you known?"

      Indira winces. "Since Starkiller," she admits and he can't stop the bitter laugh that escapes his lips.

       "Got it," Poe says. "Which means that you weren't just lying to me about your father during all that time — you were also lying to me about the rest of your convoluted family tree."

      "I didn't ask to play a part in any of this, you know," she snaps, irritated. "And the truth about Ren wasn't my secret to tell."

     "It wasn't yours to keep, either," he shoots back. "Not from me. I never would have kept something like that from you."

     Indira shakes her head. "It was mine to keep," she argues. "Because Leia asked me to keep it. And as much as I lo — I cared for you, my duty was still to her."

      "That's bantha shit," Poe says scornfully. "You didn't tell me because it was easier."

     "I didn't tell you because I respect Leia," Indira replies, her voice calm and even; refusing to match the heat behind his tone. "That doesn't necessarily mean that I agree with her choice, but I respected it all the same, Poe. It wasn't my secret to tell."

      "So I should what — ignore the fact that Leia has lied to the entirety of the Resistance about who her son is for years?" Poe demands. "I should respect that she didn't tell me it was her son — someone I knew as a kid — who tortured me and burned my home to the ground?"

     "I'm not saying that," Indira interrupts. "Coming from someone who knows firsthand what it feels like to have a person you trust lie to you, I think you have every right to feel upset."

      "But?" He prompts, raising a skeptical brow. "There's a but in there somewhere."

     "But," she continues, lacing her fingers together and resting her elbows on the dash, "sometimes you have to try and see things from their perspective. My mother lied to me for twenty years about who my father was, Poe. When I found out the truth, I was angry. More than that, I was hurt. It took some time for me to make peace with it, but I've come to realize just how hard it must have been for my mother to live with that lie. She kept that secret because the truth was painful for her to acknowledge and because she thought it was the right thing to do. Not because she wanted to hurt me."

     His resolve wavers as Poe thinks of Leia and all the pain she has endured at the hands of her family — first from Vader, then from her son. Ben Solo had killed his father — the man Leia loved — and it'd been his fault that Luke Skywalker had died, too. Leia had lost so much, yet she had kept fighting in spite of it all; no matter the fact that it was her son on the other side.

     "Can you imagine how much pain Leia has had to endure for years?" Indira asks, her voice low. "If she'd told people the truth of Ren's identity, there's no guarantee that they would have followed her. Look at what happened when the Senate learned about her ties to Vader — they turned their backs on her and cast her out. I don't blame Lei for not wanting that to happen again; not when she is the one person who has held this Resistance together for years. People believe in her. She couldn't risk losing that when there is so much at stake."

      Poe's anger fades, replaced by shame when he thinks of the words he'd spat at Leia — you're a liar and a fraud — and how she had let him leave without attempting to defend herself. He'd never been a perfect soldier and he had let Leia down many times before — the mutiny on the Raddus being his biggest sin — yet she'd never been as callous or as cruel as he had in any of her reprimands; no matter how disappointed she was with him.

      "She shouldn't have lied to me," he says, but the words feel hollow and empty.

      "No, she shouldn't have," Indira agrees. "But can you see why she did?"

      Poe swallows thickly. Thankfully, he's spared from having to answer when the green transmission light on the console begins to blink. Sitting up in his seat, Poe flips the switch; eager for the chance to think about something else. "Identify yourself."

     "Poe Dameron, is that you?" A woman's raspy voice asks.

      His brow furrows. "Maz?" He asks incredulously.

     "Of course it's me, you fool!" She replies haughtily. "Who else would be calling?"

      He bites back a snarky retort. "Is everything alright, Maz?"

     The pirate queen scoffs. "Why don't you tell me?" She challenges. "I heard about Yavin Four — nasty business, that must have been. Reminds me of what happened my castle."

      "It was a nice castle," Poe admits.

     "Maz, why did you call?" Indira interrupts, getting straight to business. "What's going on?"

      "I have information for Leia," Maz replies, her voice growing somber. "Is she there?"

     "I'll get her," Indira says quickly, climbing out of her seat and exiting the cockpit in a hurry to find her aunt.

     "Where'd you get this information, Maz?" Poe asks, ignoring the sick feeling in his stomach. He isn't sure that he's quite ready to face Leia so soon after their argument.

      "Nhagy, of course," she informs him and Poe's eyes widen.

      "Wait, Raena Nhagy?" He repeats. "She's still alive?"

     "Yes, that foolish girl," Maz says, her voice filled with affectionate disapproval. "She's still doing her part for the Resistance behind enemy lines."

     "Kriff," Poe mutters, running a hand through his hair. "I hadn't realized she was still a spy."

      "She's in this till the bitter end," Maz replies. "Same as you and yours."

      Before he can respond, the door to the cockpit slides open once more and Leia enters with Indira, Finn, and a tired looking Rey in tow. Poe avoids the general's gaze as she takes a seat in the empty chair next to him, staring down at his hands.

      "Maz?" Leia calls. "I'm here."

     "Leia, I'm afraid that I have troubling news," Maz admits. "Nhagy has told me that Kylo Ren has paid a visit to Exegol."

     Poe doesn't miss the way that Leia flinches at the mention of her son and it makes him feel even more guilty than he did before. "Exegol is the hidden world of the Sith," Rey mutters under her breath, drawing everyone's attention to her. "I read about it in the Jedi texts."

     "You're right," Maz confirms. "What he found there, I do not know, but I fear he may have dabbled with the forces of the Dark. He is a true Sith now and more powerful because of it."

      "That's what I felt on Yavin," Rey whispers, her voice low. "Why it all seemed so wrong. There's no light left in him."

      Leia's shoulders droop and she rests her head in her hands, leaning her elbows against the dash. "What does this mean, Maz?"

     "I don't know," the other woman admits. "But I will continue to seek out answers."

      A heavy sigh leaves the general's lips. "Thank you."

     "I have more information for you," Maz continues. "Perhaps the answer to your question about your missing allies."

     Poe's eyes narrow and he leans forward in his seat, unable to keep quiet. "Tell us."

      "We've known for years that the First Order has been taking children and making people disappear on the margins of the galaxy," Maz begins and Poe can't stop himself from glancing over at Finn, whose face grows hard at the mention of the First Order and their child solider regime.

      "But things are escalating now: arresting people on false charges. Small crimes blown up into capital offenses. People going missing in the dead of night. Nighttime raids or picked up off the streets and —" she makes a snapping sound "— vanished. The ones most likely to disappear? People with ties to the old rebellion and — interestingly enough — we're seeing it with some old Imperials, as well. Those who have been outspoken about their distaste for the First Order, but also those who have remained neutral. Anyone who might pose a threat, now or down the line."

     Poe can't stop himself from frowning. "You think that's what's happened to our allies?" He asks. "They're not answering the call because they can't? They've been arrested?"

      "Maybe. Possibly," Maz confirms. "But the First Order used to do it in secret; now they don't bother. They snatch people off the streets and don't even pretend to have whatever planet they've infiltrated hold a sham trial. Just death or labor camps."

     "Labor camps?" Indira repeats, her expression stricken.

     "Someone has to build all their fancy new ships, eh?"

     "What can we do to help them?" Poe demands. "There has to be something."

     "Rumor has it that there's a list somewhere of all the people they've taken. A big list. No one's seen it, but I have a source who claims to know more about it — a First Order defector; someone who had ties to leadership before he left. He is willing to meet with the Resistance if you can guarantee that he and his company will not be harmed."

      His eyes narrow with suspicion. "What kind of company?"

      "You'll have to ask him," Maz replies. "I'll pass on his contact information."

      Leia nods, looking wearier than Poe has ever seen her before; or perhaps she'd always been that weary and he had been too blind to see it. "Thank you, Maz. That's very helpful.

     "Is there anything else I can do for you, Leia?" Maz asks and the general purses her lips.

     "Do you know of anywhere that we can lay low for the time being?" She asks. "Somewhere the Resistance can regroup — just until we're able to find a new base."

      "I may know a place," Maz muses. "But I can't promise that it will be pleasant." Poe isn't sure he likes the sound of that. "I'll send the coordinates your way."

      "You're a treasure, Maz," Leia replies sincerely.

      "Indeed I am," Maz agrees before bringing the transmission to an end. "I'll be in touch. Tah!"

      There's silence for a few moments as everyone in the cockpit allows the weight of Maz's words sink in. Ren was more dangerous than ever before, their allies had most likely been rounded up and imprisoned by the First Order, and that was just the tip of the iceberg. Slowly, the group begins to dissipate.

      "I need to look something up," Rey mutters, exiting the room in a hurry to undoubtedly return to the Jedi texts she'd obtained from Luke Skywalker's island.

     "I'll go tell Chewie about the new coordinates," Finn decides, following close behind her. "He'll want to know where we're headed!"

     "And I'll ... go look into Maz's mysterious contact?" Indira adds hastily, making a face as if she isn't quite sure about that excuse, but she takes it nonetheless; fleeing from the cockpit and leaving only Poe and Leia behind.

       Poe is still unable to meet Leia's gaze, keeping his eyes cast downwards. Neither of them say anything for several minutes before Leia finally sighs and moves to rise from her chair. Poe doesn't stop her; not until he hears the doors slide open.

      "General, can I have a word?" Poe asks, scrambling to stand from his seat in a hurry.

      Leia turns sharply to look at him and the door closes behind her. "Poe, I'm —"

      He cuts her off quickly, shaking his head. "You've kept your son's secret for eight years," Poe begins. "During that time, you raised an army, lost your husband, lost your brother, and suffered countless other losses; all while bearing that burden on your shoulders alone because you believed that was what you needed to do to keep the galaxy from falling to pieces."

      Leia's chin quivers, eyes red and glossy. It's the closest Poe has ever seen her to breaking.

      "That must have been incredibly lonely," he finally says.

      A sob escapes Leia's lips and her face crumples before she brings a hand to her mouth, stifling her grief. In an instant, Poe steps around the pilot's seat so he can embrace her and the two of them cling to each other tightly. "I should have told you sooner," Leia says, her voice muffled by his shirt. "I'm so sorry, Poe. You deserved to know the truth."

      "I shouldn't have called you a liar or a fraud," he apologizes, sniffling slightly. "You're none of those things, Leia. You're the strongest person I've ever known."

      She pulls back from the embrace, cupping his face fondly, and it makes his eyes sting. "You're a good man, Poe Dameron."

      Poe ducks his head, unable to hold her gaze. In that moment, he feels more determined than ever to not disappoint his general ever again. Leia's son had failed her deeply; Poe would not make the same mistake.

      "Well," he says, offering her his most winning smile and clasping her hands between his. "I learned from the best."

a/n: hi hi hi i am SO sorry that this update is so late 🥴 i had a ton of back-to-back midterms last week and i was out of town for a few days and i have been feeling a little under the weather lately, so writing hasn't been the easiest thing for me. i honestly struggled a lot with this chapter and i know it wasn't the best, so i'm sorry about that! 😕 but the good news is that things should start to pick up very, very soon!!! quick disclaimer: the next few chapters of this book are heavily inspired by the canon novelization resistance reborn that takes place between tlj and tros. if you've read that book, then you'll ~sort of~ have an idea of where this fic is going 👀 although i'm not going to be following the plot verbatim. i really enjoyed that book — maybe even more than the movie — and the characterization of poe was SO GOOD, so i really wanted to incorporate some of it into this fic. that being said: if you're super anxious for us to get to the movie, that should be happening in about ~five~ chapters or so if things go according to the plan in my outline (don't quote me on that though, bc my outlines are notorious for not matching up the way i think they will 😁🤞) but anyways 🥴 tl;dr: thank you for your patience & support!!!! it is much appreciated 🥺💓

p.s. i'm pretty sure it's NOT canon that poe and ben knew each other as kids, but i sort of am ~intrigued~ by the concept, so in this book i've included them meeting once when they were like 8 and 6 but again: it's NOT canon so be aware of that!

p.p.s. SORRY TO ANYONE GETTING THE NOTIFICATION FOR THIS CHAPTER MORE THAN ONCE!!!!

POSTED ON:
02.05.20