CHAPTER 41- GUILT AND REGRET

'Little more.' Siham said to Mehran who is attempting to zip back of her nude and red Anarkali suit. The zip is stuck and Mehran is getting annoyed. Ever since breakfast, he is thinking about Umaira's words. I didn't say anything before respecting your age and the fact that you are Mehran's mother What did she mean by this? Umaira had only one meeting with his mother, but then Umaira had said nothing happened? He knew she was lying then.

Subconsciously, he pulled up the zip harshly.

'Ahh....'Siham winced breaking Mehran's chain of thoughts. He apologized. Siham smiled, 'Don't tear my clothes.' she then turned around and smiled wrapping her arms around his neck.

'This is designer, baby. But don't worry I have one extra. You can tear that tonight.' She winked. Mehran sighed and moved her arms, 'Siham, please.' He said and Siham pouted. He ignored her and walked towards his wardrobe, his mind thinking of ways to confront his mother.

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Huma is having beauticians dress her while Umaira is getting dressed herself. She has decided to wear a lehenga despite her mother's multiple requests to wear a saree, she doesn't want the Mehendi incident to repeat. She wore a sea green jacket blouse with high collar and ink blue lehenga with delicate golden work on it and dark blue patch at the edge. Umaira wore a gold neckpiece, combed her hair leaving it open. Applied her makeup, perfume and wore Golden stilettos and she is done.

Huma envied her, the flip side of being a bride, too much heavy jewellery, make-up, dress and so more time to get ready.

'Beta, go check if the groom side is ready. Please' Huma's mother insisted. Though Umaira wasn't comfortable, she couldn't refuse her maternal aunt.

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Mehran got dressed in cream and golden Shervani. Siham had already left with Amreen so he didn't waste any time and marched to his parent's room. He must talk to his mother else he will lose his sanity overthinking the possibilities. He knocked the door and entered when a female voice called him in. Mehran saw his dad standing and his mother buttoning the collar of his shervani.

'Arey, beta!' his mother greeted him happily. But her warm welcome was greeted by a frown from Mehran.

'Kya hua?' His father asked sternly.

'What were you talking to Umaira?' Mehran ignored his father and asked his mother directly. Now, it is her turn to frown.

'What?'

'Don't act like you don't know anything. I heard you talking to Umaira at the breakfast table.' Mehran said

'Mehran, why are discussing that girl?' his father interrupted sternly.

'Exactly!' his mother agreed. Mehran looked at his father, 'Because I still love her and I don't want anyone hurting her. Plus, you guys have already done so much damage with your fake drama of having a heart attack. If not for that, I and Umaira would have been married. We would have been together and happy. Now, that you guys have already done enough so please (he joined his palms together) stay away from Umaira.' He said. His parents stood wide-eyed.

'You are arguing with your parents for a silly girl.' His father spat angrily.

'She is not a silly girl, she is the woman I love. Please Dad, there is already a trench between us that only grew in these five years thanks to that betrayal of yours. Please, don't make me distance myself so much that there is no returning back.' Mehran said. His father didn't say anything, Mehran could see hurt in his eyes. He too is hurt by what his parents had done, so he didn't feel guilty.

Before anyone else spoke, he turned and walked away. His parents simply watched him go, his mother had begun to cry but his father stood still. As Mehran walked out from the room, he accidently dashed into Umaira who stood just outside the door. She held the wall with one palm and another palm resting on her chest, her eyes moist. Shit! She heard everything, Mehran thought.

Mehran didn't say anything, he walked away. Umaira stood still staring front where just seconds ago, Mehran had said.

Fake drama? Heart attack? Marriage? Umaira's head is echoing with these words. That day, their wedding day, Mehran's parents had fooled him. He didn't come, why? Because his father had a fake heart attack he thought was real? Umaira smacked her forehead. How stupid is she? How STUPID! She didn't ask him why he didn't come that day, when he tried justifying she had slapped him. Umaira is shattered with this revelation. She fell back leaning against the wall, her breathing heavy and tears pouring down her cheeks.

Mehran knew Umaira needed time after hearing the shocking truth, the other side of the story and so he left without talking to her. He walked straight to the venue. It was still very early for anyone to have come. Mehran sat on an empty seat and sighed, he buried his face in his palms. Now, that Umaira knows the truth he must handle this carefully. He doesn't want Umaira to feel guilty, whatever happened is in the past now. He doesn't want Umaira to feel miserable about herself.

The outside sound got muffled, everything blurred. Mehran's words and the slap echoing in her head. All Umaira could see was dejected yet furious young Mehran standing at end of the stairs holding his cheek. Umaira felt even more terrible. She walked towards her room like a zombie. Had she not been so impulsive, she and Mehran would have been together and happy.

Huma spoke something to her as she walked in the room. But nothing went into her ears, Umaira was numb. She walked into the washroom and splashed water on her face. Her make-up faded. But Umaira didn't care. All she kept thinking, had she not been so impulsive things would have been so different. She recollected Mehran's words from last night, "I still love you." She glanced sadly at her solitaire ring in her ring finger, her words echoed in her head, "There is no point of this, anymore." She splashed more water on her face all the while mentally cursing herself. She took deep breathes but couldn't control her tears. She clenched the washbasin tightly breaking down crying.

'I am sorry.... I ruined everything...I am sorry....'she kept telling herself but no matter how many sorry she says nothing can bring the lost years. The years she and Mehran lost being away from each other when they could have been together and happy.

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Mehran didn't realize for how long he had been sitting, he realized only when Amreen poked his arm with her finger. He looked around and noticed the venue is now almost full. 'What are you doing here? Nikaah will be read soon. Shadab is looking for you.' She said.

'Huh! Yes.' Mehran said standing up. Amreen noticed her brother lost.

'Bhai? Sab theek?' she asked concerned. Mehran looked at Amreen, 'She knows everything now, Amreen. Umaira heard everything about that night.' he said. Amreen blinked at him and then smiled.

'It is good na. At least the misunderstanding will be over.' Amreen said brightly. Mehran smiled sadly, 'I hope that was enough.' Mehran said 'I think you too should talk to each other. And whatever you decide...think about Siham also.' Amreen suddenly sounded serious. Mehran nodded. He knows nothing substantial will happen when and if they talk to each other, things have become too complicated.

Nikaah got over soon. Huma was puddle of tears by the time she said "Qubool hai" three times. Umaira herself wasn't in her senses to console her but to not make things obvious she consoled Huma. Yes, she had mixed feelings about her cousin getting married but more are the feelings of guilt and regret. After all, crying and celebration, the beautician re did the make-up for Huma. Umaira is amazed as to how, Huma changed colours from being a crying mess into a cheerful blushing bride.

'I am married!' she beamed at Umaira, who simply smiled at her. She is genuinely happy for her cousin.


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