The new captain's ready room felt foreign to Spock. Not that he ever intended to command a starship. It brought him great displeasure to steal the Enterprise after activating his star fleet commission. He sat down in his chair looking over toward a picture of Decker with his parents in the background appearing to be youthful. His heart ached. Spock and Jim could have conceived a child after the surgery. The surgery that was planned after the second five year mission to give him a synthetic womb. What they could have done during the refit . . . They had planned together their future. A future that would never come to be. Spock slammed the photograph down on the desk laying flat with its support part sticking up. Spock turned the closed photograph away from his direction. Spock turned the chair away from the desk.

Spock rubbed his forehead feeling immense, heavy grief.

Three years under going Kolinahr had done nothing for Spock.

"La'tusa nash-veh na' k'du," Spock said, softly to himself in Vulcan.

Why does it hurt so much?, Spock thought, then he added to himself, Because it was real.

Tears rolled down the Vulcan's green cheeks. He leaned forward placing his hands onto his face as he wept. His shoulders rolled up and down. He took pauses in between his weeping allowing himself to emotionally handle the emotions without killing himself because of it. Emotions were Vulcan's worse enemy in the end. Bendii Syndrome was a rare neurological disorder that was inflicted to Vulcan elders beyond the age of two hundred. It only struck a minority of the elder Vulcans. Spock mathematically weeped. He lowered his hands down and straightened himself wiping a tear off his face. He turned back in the direction of the desk.

Through the doorway came Xon.

"Captain," Xon said.

"Lieutenant," Spock said.

"Permission to speak freely?" Xon asked.

"Permission granted," Spock said.

"Is there someone at Hellgaurd that concerns you?" Xon asked. "To risk being dishonorably discharged for stealing your ship?"

"There is," Spock said. "someone I was once close to."

"Doctor McCoy," Xon deduced.

Spock tilted his head slightly.

"Negative," Spock said. He straightened his head. "my brother."

"Mr Sybok?" Xon said. "I am familiar to him."

"Most Vulcans," Spock said.

"You do not understand," Xon said. "I met him once after a protest. A traumatic one. I met them at different times."

"Intriging," Spock said. "what else do you know of Doctor McCoy?" Spock gestured the young man in.

Xon approached the desk.

"Last I heard, he and his assistant Mr Mallard were taking care of a Klingon troop near the neutral zone," Xon said. "There had been a internal fight between the houses that was resolved." He tilted his head. "But I find it not at all troubling that he is there. Did you hear of the stories where he delivered Gorn triplets in a conflict zone a few months ago? My father met him personally at the conflict zone two months ago."

"Sit down," Spock said. "and tell me, what other conflict zones has the doctor been going illegally into?"

"The Dineo-Beharian, The Loche-Gangorian, The Romulan-Klingon Conflict Zone--resolved, peacefully--, The Lacciev-Hondurian, Gangorian-Hondurian, The Gangorian-Romulan, The Gangorian-Hondurian, Hondurian-Thermian, and if you would like to see the evidence I recommend you look up Medical Privatize Corps NewsWatch," Xon said. "He is in all of the videos. Can't miss him."

Spock jotted down on the flat screen.

The computer screen changed to a moving picture where McCoy was seen taking care of a patient at the left hand corner of the room with a growing stubble on his chin. He saw the stardate indicate that it was shortly after the five year mission had concluded, sometime afterwards, with his knitted bull horn eyebrows hunched forward in the direction of the patient with a ant like head except no antennas. He muted the sound from the device and saw McCoy in the background. He was handed a dermal regenerator by a nurse. It appeared as though they were not on a starship but on a ground based location. Star Fleet did not have wars but there were areas of conflicts where some species had. Small, but relatively minor that were considered protests by humans. Spock was somewhat familiar to the species but mostly the fish headed Gangorian conflicts. The Gangorians had a safe, wet environment. It was perpetually wet and hardly dried but they had policies regarding their flowers and other plant life being exchanged through the quadrant.

Spock paused the video.

"Have you met the doctor during his activities?" Spock asked.

Xon nodded.

"I was part of the Dineo-Beharian protest with my colleagues regarding the inhumane treatment of the shared Green Pandas," Xon said. "I only spoke with the doctor because he had awaken me from my healing trance," Spock nodded, as though he understood the doctors antics. "and he was cranky."

"It appears that no matter where he is, the doctor is that way," Spock said.

"Captain," Xon said. "that is a Romulan Colony, and I advise you, as second officer, since you had Miss Ilia escorted to the brig, that you return to the Vulcan and not breach a interplanetary war."

"The needs of the many outweigh the needs the of the few," Spock said.

"But the few are the colonists, and the united federation of planets is the many," Xon said.

"You are adjusting to working with humans, right?" Spock inquired.

"Affirmative, captain," Xon said.

"Sometimes, not always," Spock said. "when it comes to humans being threatened, my adun once said: 'Rules, what rules?'." A fond memory returned into Spock's mind. It was in their second year of serving together, bonded, as husband and husband. Jim was emotionally compromised when McCoy was part of the medical party that was captured by Klingon forces. Klingons could harm other humans, kill them if need be, if they were posing a threat against them as warriors. Spock calmed his adun in private. . . He could still remember it.

~

"The doctor is a very capable man," Spock said. "He can take care of himself."

"But these are Klingons, Mr Spock," Jim, said, sinking down into the cabin's chair.

"Ashalik nash-veh," Spock placed a hand on the man's shoulder. "he will make himself useful for them. Klingons always need doctors due to their violent tendencies."

Jim looked up toward Spock.

"Violent tendencies. . ." Jim said. "oh boy, so, we should wait them out?"

"Logically, he will be on their tail long enough that they will send him back," Spock said.

"If that doesn't happen. . ." Jim said, unable to finish the grim thought.

"He will organize a escape and beam himself over with the survivors of his group," Spock said.

"Bones?" Jim said. "Organizing a escape?"

"It is not far fetched as you would think," Spock said.

"He leaves it to us on a escape plan," Jim said.

"He relies on our courage," Spock said. Jim raised an eyebrow.

"Too much reliance?" Jim said. "Or too much dependence on us?"

"He is a doctor, not a captain," Spock said. "humans have a odd way of getting back to where they belong. And find themselves doing things they would not ordinary do to get home."

"That is true," Jim said.

"Otherwise, the Enterprise should remain in orbit of the planet." Spock said.

Jim smiled.

"Why Mr Spock, you make me believe in hope," Jim said, holding his two fingers out.

"You make me believe in miracles, captain," Spock said, returning the gesture.

~

"I do not understand," Xon said.

"Humans will make you feel for them and then put themselves into harms way," Spock said.

"I see," Xon said. "logically, the favor must be returned."

"Indeed," Spock said.

"As captain, you are not obligated to go on a away mission," Xon said.

"That never stopped Captain Kirk and that will not stop me," Spock said. "you are dismissed, Mr Xon."

Xon stood up from the chair then walked around it where he headed out of the captain's ready room. His first assignment in deep space was going off eventfully. His parents T'Lance and T'Sybok were more proud of him for being where he was at now. His father, a short Vulcan with a cardiac heart, compared to the brick house built Vulcanian woman that he was betrothed. His father was captaining a zoologist working to conserve Sehlats. He made his way down the hall until he came to the turbo lift. He came inside and then pressed a button to indicate which level he wanted to go to. He had a unusual feeling regarding Hellgaurd. He had to acquaint himself to Doctor Stone and his head nurse Christine Chapel. The turbo lift doors closed and opened then before him. The young Vulcan headed down the hall past several officers.

Mr Spock had yet to announce why they had left Vulcan without the captain. It was quite out of character for a Vulcan to take command of a vessel and not give a reason to the crew. Xon entered sick bay to see Mr Stone with his long dark brown hair in a scrunchy. He looked like one of those people you will find on a retrieval mission for Star Fleet and cleverly taking down targets who threaten the mission's success. Perhaps Xon counted as he was part of the crew. Xon was not exactly the kind who would go around announcing it to every person he encountered. Perhaps Spock was designing his words to tell the crew of the ship which perhaps be a reasonable explanation.

"Doctor Stone," Xon said.

Stone turned around with raised eyebrows then he grew a pleased expression on his face.

"Mr Xon," Stone said.

"You will be expecting a patient in here of some importance to the captain," Xon said.

Stone appeared to be alarmed.

"Captain Decker?" Stone said. "What do you mean something is going to happen to Lieutenant Ilia?"

"Negative," Xon said. "Captain Spock."

"Ohh. . ." Stone frowned. "He doesn't have another husband," He raised an eyebrow. "does he?"

"Negative," Xon said. "it is Doctor McCoy who may need critical, emergency care."

"I can't believe the Vulcan got married so soon after his loss," Stone said. "oh well," the human shrugged. "Vulcans move on differently."

Xon paused, considering that, staring off into space over the man's shoulder.

Doctor McCoy and Captain Spock an item? It was a unexpected remark. The more he thought about it, the more reasonable it started to sound, and the more logical it began to sound, the less shocking it was. They had worked closely together during the beginning of the five year mission most notably when it came to ensuring the safety of the captain. The amount of times they had been on a away mission together without the captain. The thought gradually slid down into his head until it didn't bother him. The Vulcanian captain apparently found out by some method that his fainusu was in need of help.

"Hello?" Stone said, waving his hand in the Vulcan's vision. "Are you there, kid?"

"I am fine, Doctor," Xon said. "I am here about my medical files."

"Your medical files came in before we left," Stone said.

"And Captain Decker?" Xon asked.

"Yes, I did, but getting Doctor McCoy's medical file won't be easy without his permission," Stone said. "and I can easily say this new captain won't be giving me permission to access his medical file any time soon." He raised an eyebrow. "Do you have any medical secrets regarding your health that is not in your file?"

"Negative, Doctor," Xon said.

"Good," Stone said. "go to the rec area and relax. Doctor's orders."

"I will attempt to sit back and 'chill out'," Xon said. "do you play bat mitton by any chance?"

"Yes," Stone said.

"Would you be troubled if we played bat mitton in the rec room?" Xon asked.

"Nah," Stone said. "I haven't played it in a long time. Let's do it after we pick up the captain."

Xon nodded.

"I look forward toward playing against you, Doctor," Xon said, then exited the room.