Of all the things to kill an Avenger... After everything they had all gone through... He was taken out by a car accident.

A hit-and-run of all things killed Tony Stark.

And it was Peter's fault.

If Peter had moved faster to save that little girl, then Mr. Stark wouldn't have felt the need to push them both out of the way - sans his iron suit. He should have just left them; Peter would have been able to survive a hit by a diesel truck! He could have tossed the girl to Mr. Stark and taken the hit like he was supposed to!

But Tony just had to play the sacrifice card...

Peter could still vividly remember the moment that Mr. Stark had stopped moving in the middle of the road as they waited for paramedics; the moment that no matter how much Peter screamed, Mr. Stark wasn't coming back to him.

He withdrew from everyone after that. Some of the Avengers had tried to call him but he had just turned his phone off... He didn't want to talk with anyone, May and Ned included. It wasn't fair to anyone, but he just couldn't deal with their sympathetic looks and voices then... He really couldn't! The moment that May had arrived at the hospital and first gave Peter that look, he had bolted to the nearest exit - a window on the third floor.

Pulling his hoodie up, Peter swung through the city as fast as he could, trying to get away from his feelings. He wanted to be empty right now, he wanted to feel the wind rushing against him as he moved, wanted to feel the rush of adrenaline as he free-fell.

But no matter how fast he swung or how far he fell, he couldn't get away from his emotions and those traitorous hot tears ran down his face against his will.

He was the reason Tony Stark was dead. It was as if he had put his hands around his throat and killed him himself...!

A week had passed before it was time for the funeral, the first time any of them had seen Peter since the accident. May was almost convinced that he wouldn't show up, and she had a right mind to scold him for disappearing if he did.

No one had seen him enter, or no one had cared to watch for him, but he was suddenly there among the crowd and fighting off tears as Pepper gave her speech about him. Steve and Natasha had both tried to go to him once the service was over, but Peter had disappeared as suddenly as he had come.

Another two weeks had gone by with still no word from Peter or sightings of Spider-Man; the two had completely dropped off the map. Just as Peter wanted. He wanted to be alone; he wanted his time to grieve. That was normal and respectable, right? He had just lost a father figure and dear friend, couldn't people understand that?

Taking a deep breath, Peter closed his eyes as his fists clenched. No one understood that...

"Everyone is worried, you know."

"Leave me alone."

Footsteps clicked against the roof behind him as Loki came to stand next to Peter at the edge, looking out at the city. "Your aunt keeps coming to me in tears because she worries so much. At least text her."

Peter's jaw clenched as he started to turn away, more than prepared to swing to solitude somewhere else. Loki grabbed his upper arm though, keeping him in place. In a reflex move, Peter grabbed Loki's wrist and glared at the man, "I said, leave me alone."

"What? Are you going to snap my wrist if I don't?"

"No!"

"Then I will not let you go off on your own again, it's not safe for you-"

"Safe? I'm an enhanced superhero; I think I can take care of myself!"

Loki sighed as he fought to hold back an eye roll, "You are emotionally unstable, child. You are not safe to yourself right now. When was the last time you ate? Slept? I bet you haven't even showered since the funeral."

"None of that matters-"

"Stark wouldn't want this."

"Don't tell me what he would or wouldn't want!" Peter yelled, yanking his arm free and stumbling away from Loki. "This is what I want! Me, my wish! This is what I deserve! Does anyone care about what I want? No, because if anyone did then he wouldn't be gone!"

It was silent for a while, Loki staring at Peter with narrowed eyes as he tried his best not to break down and cry. His stiff posture and averted eyes telling Loki things he didn't want to believe.

"You..." Loki started, "You blame yourself...?"

Peter's breath caught in his throat as he turned away, "That truck was meant for me...! It was headed straight for me and I froze...! If I would have moved a little faster, maybe I could have thrown that girl to safety and Mr. Stark would have had to hold her instead of jumping for me...! I could survive being hit by a truck, I'm enhanced and gone through much worse! I could have survived that... But he moved before I could." Peter sniffled and rubbed a fist roughly against his eye, "And no matter what you say, it won't change a thing. It's my fault that he died. And everyone knows it."

Loki's brows furrowed together as his head tilted slightly, leaning forward just a bit. "Everyone knows it? Who is 'everyone'? Because last I checked, none of the Avengers do. They blame the truck driver who was texting and not paying attention to the red light he was running through, not you. As I said before, everyone is worried about you. They haven't heard from you in weeks, they're concerned about your welfare."

"And you?" Peter glanced back at him, "You're not 'concerned about my welfare'?"

A grim smirk pulled on Loki's lips, "I know all about your welfare, child. Did you honestly think I would leave you alone out here for three weeks?"

Peter's eyes narrowed as he turned back to him, an almost betrayed look crossing his face. "You've been watching me?"

A single nod was the only response he received.

"I just want to have time to process my emotions - by myself! Is that too much to ask? I want to work it out by myself! Why can't anyone understand that?"

Loki sighed as he slowly shook his head, taking a step closer and opening his arms. "We both know that's not really what you want, Peter."

The boy stared at him with a blank expression for nearly a minute, his body unmoving. Then suddenly he lunged.

Loki was nearly knocked backwards by the force Peter hit him, his small arms wrapping around the man's midsection tightly as he buried his face into Loki's chest, a small sob breaking from him. Loki patted his back gently at first before slowly returning the hug, holding the boy close to him. The front of his black suit had started to become wet with his tears, but Loki paid it no mind as he rubbed his back.

It was awkward for him, having never attempted to comfort someone before... But Loki was willing to push that feeling away at the moment. Peter needed him more than Loki needed a comfort zone.

"I miss him..."

"I know."

"Why did he do that...?"

"...Because the thought of seeing you hit by a truck is more terrifying than having it happen to himself."

"I would have lived..."

Loki's grip tightened ever so slightly, "You don't know that."

The two stayed like that for most of the night, Peter muttering and Loki doing his best to answer comfortingly. Each hour that passed, Peter had leaned more and more into Loki until the man was supporting his full weight. He soon realized that the boy had fallen asleep, an almost-smile making its way to Loki's face as he picked him up and brought him to a hotel for the night.

It still took a few days for Peter to want to go back home, Loki with him the whole time to make sure he ate and slept properly - as well as offering the best comfort that he could. It was hard and long, but there was a sense of hope when Peter fixed them both an omelet without Loki having to even ask if Peter was hungry.

There was still a long way to go before the gaping hole in Peter's chest even remotely stopped hurting, but having Loki by his side was definitely helping him feel less alone...

Glancing up at the man eating across the table from him, Peter smiled a bit. As long as Loki was there, he might actually be able to get through this.

AN: No preview of this chapter on Ko-Fi like I said before... In all honestly, I hadn't planned on writing this chapter. I wrote it in an hour in order to get over my own chaotic emotions.

I have three cats: an old man I took from my neglectful neighbors, and my rescued twin girls. Five months ago, there was a bad storm that knocked out the power in my neighborhood and I went driving to see the damage. As I was driving, I saw two little kittens on the side of the road. They had been dropped off in the middle of a storm, what sick person would do that? They were very tame and came to me when I called. They were the sweetest and fluffiest little things you would ever see.

All of my cats have been rescued in some way, and I would form deep bonds with them because of it. Unfortunately I live in the country where there's a lot of wild animals... Like coyote packs that love running in the cold weather.

My mom's cat was taken by the coyotes four days ago.

Tonight... I believe my youngest twin was taken. The pack had just come running through an hour ago in the field that the twins love to play in. I called the cats to come in, and only one twin made it to the door.

I walked the entire yard calling but couldn't find her. She may show up in the morning, I really hope she does. She might have just gotten stuck in a tree or fell asleep in the shed, and I'm going through emotional turmoil for nothing, but right now I'm in mourning for her.

I am working on a Halloween special as well as two other requests, but that special might be a bit late because of this now... I hope you all understand.