Season 4, Episode 14:  I Do

Ownership of Glee:  FOX, Ryan Murphy, Ian Brennan, Brad Falchuk

= = =

"Glee Club!" Will says as he walks into the choir room, Finn not far behind him.

The New Directions stand up and they all walk over to Will, hugging him.

"Mr. Shue, how was D.C.?" Violet asks.

Will smiles. "D.C. was great, but now I am back to stay."

"Holla!" Artie cheers.

"And so, for my first order of business, I want to give a big shout-out to the guy who made sure I had something to come back to... Mr. Finn Hudson." Will says.

The New Directions cheer for their assistant coach.

"Now... for this week's assignment..." Will starts.

"I hope it's Britney again." Brittany says.

Will writes the word WEDDING on the board.

"Miss Pillsbury and I are finally getting married." He announces.

"Yeah!" Sam cheers.

"Which makes me the happiest, luckiest man alive. Now, Emma has been handling all the prep, so to help out, I thought I'd take charge of the entertainment for the reception. And though this goes against tradition, it would mean the world to me and to Emma if, instead of giving your best man's speech, Finn, you sing for us. What do you think?" Will asks.

Finn smiles. "Uh... uh, yeah, of course."

Will smiles. "Perfect. For everyone else who isn't out with Asian bird flu..." he trails off.

"It wasn't me." Tina states.

"...it's a Valentine's Day wedding, which means, we need some great romantic love songs at the reception." Will finishes.

"Wait. You want us to be your wedding singers?" Violet asks.

Will smiles and nods.

"That is so..." Kitty starts.

"Awesome." Ryder finishes.

"We'd be honored." Charlie says.

"Great. I have some great ideas." Will says.

Violet was ecstatic that Will was back.

= = =

Santana and Quinn are sitting in a pew together at Will and Emma's wedding.

"It is a Carrot Top convention. I am so over this, and it hasn't even started yet. I'm clearly the hottest bitch in this lousy joint, but I'm all alone, stuck here sitting with you." Santana complains.

"Do you want me to slap you again?" Quinn asks.

Santana rolls her eyes. "I hate weddings, and I hate Valentine's Day. They were invented by breeders to sell cheap chocolate and false hope."

"Do you know what I hate? Men. Every single one of them is a pig, except maybe Mr. Shue and Al Roker. And you know what?You were right. I do let men define me, but not anymore. Like Gloria Steinem said, 'A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.'" Quinn tells her friend.

"Al Roker is disgusting, by the way." Santana remarks.

Quinn rolls her eyes. "Whatever."

= = =

Charlie and Blaine are getting steamy in the back of Charlie's Prius.

"Had I known I was gonna get groped in the back of a Prius, I would've brought a change of clothes. I'm gonna go in there looking like The Morning After." Charlie says.

The two boys kiss again, and then Charlie breaks the kiss. "What am I doing? I'm hooking up in the back of a Prius with my ex-boyfriend." He mumbles to himself.

Blaine smirks. "You in this fey boy-tie... it's my Kryptonite." He says and brings Charlie in for another kiss.

"Wait, this doesn't mean that we're back together, right?" Charlie wonders.

Blaine shakes his head. "No, no, no. It's-it's cool."

"I know, I know. It's-it's..." Charlie trails off.

Blaine smiles. "This is just bros helping bros."

Charlie smirks. "I love it when you talk fratty." He says and they go to make out again, but a hand taps on the backseat window.

"Tell me that's not Tina again!" Blaine groans.

Instead, it's Mercedes. "Hey, can you two wrap it up? The wedding is about to start, and I need my arm-gays."

"Oh, my God." Charlie says as they get out of the back of his Prius.

"You do realize how trashy and blasphemous this is, right?" Mercedes asks as Blaine and Charlie link arms with her.

"Mercedes, everyone hooks up at weddings." Blaine comments.

Charlie nods. "Mm-hmm."

Mercedes smiles. "Let's go. This outfit needs an audience."

= = =

Violet and Kurt take their seats in Will's half of the church. They're sitting next to Quinn and Santana.

Kurt is wearing a suit and Violet's wearing a dress.

(Kurt's suit)

(Violet's dress)

"You look gorgeous." Kurt says as he holds his fiancée's hand.

Violet smiles. "Thank you. You look very handsome." She says and kisses his hand.

Santana looks across from Quinn to roll her eyes at the couple. "Okay, you know I love both of you, but can you please stop being all lovey dovey? I know it's Valentine's Day and Mr. Shue's wedding, but keep your hormones to yourselves."

Violet smiles. "We're keeping it PG, Santana. I promise. Hey. You two are dancing with me tonight at the reception right? I've already got a dance saved for Britt, but I'm dancing with all members of the Unholy Foursome."

Quinn smiles. "Of course we'll dance with you. Won't we Santana?"

Santana smiles gently. "You know I can't pass up an opportunity to dance with you Violet."

Kurt smiles as he kisses Violet's cheek. Not only is he getting a dance with her, but they're also singing a duet together, and he got them a hotel room for a little post-reception fun of their own.

Kurt loves weddings. Kurt loves Valentine's Day.

But he definitely loves Violet more. 

= = =

Will smiles from his spot at the altar. "Nice to see you all. Hey, what do you think? Nice, huh? Thank you for coming. Oh, look, it's all the Glee kids." He says.

Violet gapes when she sees Sue walking down the aisle in a wedding dress. "What the hell?" She whispers to Kurt. He looks equally as shocked.

But then again, the rest of the guests are equally as shocked.

But all the Glee kids — past and present — feel so bad when Will says these words.

"Emma left the church."

= = =

"What would you like to do, Mr. Shue?" Artie asks their teacher.

Since there's no wedding because the bride ran away, Will and his present and past students are gathered in a room in the church building.

"About what?" Will asks.

"Uh, about the reception. Miss Pillsbury's parents say they paid for the whole thing, so... we might as well go ahead and have the party and... if you ask me, they seem pretty happy about what happened." Artie answers.

Violet gently hits his shoulder. "We can't have a reception now."

"Sure you can. All of you came back, you should be together. Just because I ruined my Valentine's Day doesn't mean I have to ruin all of yours, too. I'm gonna go see if I can find Emma." Will says.

When he leaves, Santana looks at her friends.

"You heard the man. Let's go to the reception!"

= = =

"We all should've known that a Valentine's Day wedding was just asking for a disaster." Santana says as she and Quinn hang out by the bar in the hotel, where the reception is taking place.

"Love stinks." Quinn states.

The bartender looks at the two. "Sorry, ladies, can I see some I.D.?"

Santana pulls hers out. "I'm 25. Name's Rosario Cruz. I might be related to Penelope."

"You?" The bartender asks Quinn.

"Emily Stark. Barely legal." Quinn says as she flashes hers.

Santana smirks. "Well, that's good, 'cause I hear your professors are into that." She says as they both receive drinks.

"You know, we always were two ends of the same bitch-goddess spectrum. Maybe that's why we love each other so much." Santana says.

"And slap each other." Quinn comments. "You know, I have to say, Rosario, you are killing it in that dress."

"Thanks." Santana says with a smile.

Quinn looks out at all the couples dancing together. "Those romantic saps."

"You know, they may have love, but you know what we are that they are not?" Santana asks.

Quinn smirks. "Flawless."

= = =

Charlie and Blaine are singing 'I Just Can't Get Enough.'

[I Just Can't Get Enough by Barlie]

While Violet and Kurt are dancing, Violet looks over to a table, seeing Tina with an upset look and her arms crossed over her chest.

Violet taps Kurt on the shoulder. "I need to tell you something." She says, loud enough to be heard over the music by Kurt.

They walk over to a more quiet place in the reception room.

"So what's up?" Kurt asks.

Violet sighs. "Tina's finally hagged out. She brought Blaine as her date, and despite the fact that he's 100% gay... she's in love with him."

Kurt looks shocked. "You cannot be serious."

Violet frowns. "I wish I was kidding. But when she told me that she was bringing Blaine, I knew something had snapped in her brain. Kurt, she can't keep leading herself on. She's either going to get hurt, or she's going to do something to hurt her friendship with Blaine or Charlie."

Kurt nods. "You're right. God I hope she doesn't cause a scene."

= = =

Blaine smiles at his ex-boyfriend. "I'm gonna get some punch, do you want anything?" He asks.

Charlie smiles. "Uh, yeah, I'll take a cup. But just remember, we're not..."

"Dating, we're just here as friends, I know. Ooh, big cupcakes." Blaine says as he walks towards the refreshments.

Tina walks up to Charlie, arms crossed. "I don't like the way you treat Blaine. There, I said it. I don't like the way you've been treating him since your breakup.  Blaine is lonely, and yes, he cheated, and we're all human, Charlie, but we all deserve to be loved back, Charlie."

Charlie chuckles gently. "Okay, Tina. I say this with total love, but the moment we all saw coming is finally here. You're a hag. You're hagged out, you're in love with Blaine, and it's creepy. Stop." He says.

"What do you know about love? You just come and go. Who's been here to support him? Me. Who took him to Sadie Hawkins? Me. Who put him in bed when he got sick and rubbed vapor rub on his little muscled chest while he slept..." Tina trails off.

"Wait, what? Do you... huh?" Charlie asks in total confusion.

Tina pales. "What? No, I didn't mean... This isn't about me, Charlie! I have to go." She says and walks off.

"Did you vapo-rape my ex-boyfriend? Don't walk away from me, Tina Cohen-Chang!" Charlie says as he walks after her.

= = =

Kurt and Violet are up next onstage, singing Alicia Keys's 'No One.'

[No One by Vurt]

When they sing, they sing the song to each other.

Towards the back of the crowd, Violet can make out the figures of Finn and Rachel talking.

When the two fiancés finish, they get massive applause from the audience.

Kurt smiles as he kisses her cheek. "Just like old times."

Violet nods. "I really loved that."

= = =

Violet dances with Finn, Brittany, Quinn, Santana, Rachel, Charlie, Blaine and Kurt that night.

Kurt smiles as he and Violet dance while Finn and Rachel are onstage, singing 'We've Got Tonite.'

"Why don't we head off to the room I rented for us for the night when the song's over? I was thinking you and I could have some... personal celebration this Valentine's Day." Kurt says softly in her ear.

Violet smiles as she gets dipped by her fiancé. "Promise me you brought protection."

Kurt smiles. "Of course I did."

= = =

'We've Got Tonite' went from a Finchel duet to a group number by Finchel, Quinntana, Barlie, Vurt, Jarley, and Artie and Betty.

[We've Got Tonite by Finchel, Quinntana, Barlie, Vurt, Jarley and Betty and Artie]

= = =

Only 5 of 6 couples slept together that night.

Finn and Rachel.

Quinn and Santana.

Blaine and Charlie.

Kurt and Violet.

Betty and Artie.

Out of those 5, only one couple is sober during the entire time.

Kurt and Violet.

= = =

Kurt smiles as he and Violet sit in the living room of the Hudson-Hummel house, looking through wedding planners that Burt and Carole have laid out for them.

So far, they've chosen the venue, the menu, the seating, and the guest list.

"We need to pick out floral centerpieces. I'm thinking lilies. What about you?" Violet asks.

Kurt smiles. "I was thinking more along the lines of roses. They're very romantic and also very common."

Violet smiles. "Can I have a bouquet of roses and lilies?"

Kurt smiles as he kisses her. "Of course you can my love."

= = =

Tina walks up to Charlie and Blaine on Monday. "Before you say anything, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I attacked you at the reception. It's just, I saw you up there, singing with Blaine, and I saw the old, legendary chemistry. I saw two soul mates rediscovering each other, and I was jealous. Why couldn't that be me? Why can't I have that with someone?"

Blaine smiles. "You will, just not with me."

"I'm sorry that I've been throwing myself at you, making a fool of myself, hoping for something I know can never be." Tina says.

Blaine smiles. "It's okay, Tina. The truth is, we've all experienced unrequited love before, and we've all done things that we wish we didn't, and we all just want to get back to being friends."

Charlie nods. "And that's just what we are. I mean, we're just friends."

Blaine nods. "Um, well, we're going to the double feature of All About Eve and Showgirls at the revival house if you want to come with us."

"Wow." Tina says.

"Mystery solved, Hagatha Christie." Charlie jokes.

Tina sighs. "I'm gonna be a third wheel for the rest of my life."

"First of all, that's not even remotely true." Blaine dismisses. "Starting right now, I'm gonna help you get a boyfriend."

Charlie nods. "And second of all, when I called you a hag, I was bringing attention to the fact that you are honoring the noble and proud tradition of hagdom."

"Ha, ha, ha." Tina laughs gently.

Blaine nods. "Yeah, and I, for one, am psyched that my very first hag was someone as kick-ass as... Ms. Tina Cohen-Chang."

Tina smiles as she walks with her amazing friends.

= = =

The New Directions gather in the choir room on Monday afternoon, singing 'Anything Could Happen.'

[Anything Could Happen by New Directions]

At the end of the performance, they all group hug and laugh as they congratulate one another on their individual performances.

They're ready for Regionals!

= = =

2432 words

Songs Mentioned/Performed
1. I Just Can't Get Enough - Barlie
2. No One - Vurt
3. We've Got Tonite - Finchel, Quinntana, Barlie, Vurt, Jarley and Betty and Artie
4. Anything Could Happen - New Directions

I loved writing this episode!

Next update:  Girls (and Boys) on Film

2 episodes to Feud
3 episodes to Guilty Pleasures
4 episodes to Shooting Star
5 episodes to Sweet Dreams
6 episodes to Lights Out
7 episodes to Wonder-ful
8 episodes to All or Nothing

Woohoo! We're less than 10 episodes away from the season 4 finale.