"Sniper," Sivil said, looking up as Kate walked into the lab. He drew his dark brows together in concern as she leaned for a moment against the doorpost, blinking furiously for a moment before shaking her head violently. "What happened?"

Kate looked up at him, his face blurring before her and then becoming clear again. What it just her, or did a red tendril snake across his face? Pressing her hand to her forehead, she staggered into the room, vaguely seeing the lab technicians moving toward her, most likely to direct her to the reconditioning chair and assess her problem.

Kate did not want to sit in that chair.

As soon as the first lab technician touched her, a red power exploded out from her, flinging him back into a wall. The others were caught in the blast and thrown away from her, striking walls and equipment. Even Sivil was hurled backward, slamming into a counter and flipping over it.

Moans issued up from the crumpled bodies as Kate surveyed them. She had somehow ended up in a crouch and she didn't know how or why, just that when crouching, her balance was easier to maintain. That ruby red power that had possessed her was real, not a daydream. Otherwise, everything since the alleyway had been a nightmare.

If Tony was here, he'd make a reference to some horror movie about me being possessed.

Kate's head snapped up. Tony. She hadn't thought about him, not in anything more than a clinical way, since she'd been recruited into the super-agent program. Which is a nice way of saying it, she thought sarcastically. Since said recruitment meant sinking a bullet into my skull and then reviving me after my own funeral.

But she had run into Tony yesterday, hadn't she? He had recognized her too, had said her name. Her name. Her real name. Kate. Kate. Not Sniper. But Kate.

Kate Todd, that was her name.

"Sniper?"

As if in retaliation to her reclaiming her identity, Kate looked up to see Sivil poking his head up over the counter cautiously, his eyes flicking over the room. She knew him enough to know his gun was drawn, just hidden out of her sight. When he saw her looking at him warily, he sighed. "What the hell, Sniper?"

"Shut up, Sivil," she retorted as she rose into a standing position, testing out her balance. The energy coiled up inside her seemed to be sitting easier now and Kate could keep on her feet without weaving or her vision going fuzzy. "I'm not sitting in that chair."

Sivil hesitated for a moment before coming out from behind the counter, his gun back in his holster. If she hadn't known better, it would look like he hadn't just drawn it. "Okay, okay, Sniper. They were just trying to do their job."

"And I was just trying to do mine." I was protecting Gibbs when Ari 'recruited' me! I didn't want this! Any of it!

Kate hadn't thought like that in a long time.

After the Battle of D.C., she had had some unease concerning Special Agent Gibbs. Once, she had thought highly enough of him to give her life for his. And then she had been ordered to eliminate him. But then her loyalty had wavered, after he had torn off her mask and questioned her identity. A reconditioning had been needed to cleanse her mind of the unease, to repair the slowly unraveling loyalty, to instill unwavering focus. Several missions working closely with Sergeant Barnes, her Winter Soldier, had been needed to show her once more that her work was important, was essential.

But now, Kate had seen Tony DiNozzo and everything was uneasy again.

Perhaps I can undo all this. Go back, be an NCIS agent again. Have my real life again, what I would have had if Ari hadn't shot me.

Kate chided herself. She couldn't go back, could never go back. NCIS had moved on, Tony had moved on, Gibbs had moved on. Everyone had, including her. She had been replaced, her desk cleaned and then reoccupied by first Officer Ziva David, who had eventually given up her Mossad liaison position to become an NCIS agent. When she had gone home to Israel, Kate's desk had been cleaned again and then taken by Special Agent Eleanor Bishop.

She might as well face it. There was no going back, only forward.

"Sniper," Sivil said slowly, taking a cautious step toward her. Kate didn't move, just let him approach. After Barnes, Sivil was the person she trusted most now. In another life, she never would have gone anywhere near him except to arrest him. HYDRA used to mean evil to her. But now, it was almost NCIS to her. It was the only place she could go; everyone else thought she was dead.

Except for Gibbs and DiNozzo.

Sivil reached her side, the lab technicians quietly drawing themselves out of their awkward positions and trying not to moan too loudly. Although not known for being explosive, Kate was still not one to be trifled with. She had too much training, too much experience, and the scientists who had enhanced her had done too good of a job for her to be messed with. And unlike Barnes, she wasn't programmed to respond to code words.

Agents needed to be able to think. Assassins just needed to be able to kill.

"What happened?" Sivil asked, carefully reaching out and touching her shoulder. The red power didn't present itself again and for that, Kate was glad. Sivil did his best, for a HYDRA operative, and she didn't want to punish him needlessly.

Briefly, she filled him in on the details, telling him about her encounter with Loki Laufeyson and their fall through the window, the ruby red tendrils of power that had engulfed her, and her subsequent escape from NCIS and SHIELD. Sivil listened carefully, drawing his eyebrows together as she finished speaking.

"Dr. Aadland will want to examine you," he said in a low voice. "Sniper, we need to know what this power is."

No, you don't.

"It might affect your performance," Sivil continued. "We can't risk compromising a mission. So –"

"I am not sitting in that chair," Kate said firmly. "And you really can't make me, can you?"

Sivil narrowed his eyes. "Sniper, where is this coming from?"

"In case you don't recall, super-agents are left with all of their mental faculties and memories intact," Kate said harshly. She didn't care who heard her. "I can think, always have been able to. And I have decided not to sit in that chair."

Sivil sighed. "Okay, okay, Sniper. Go head to your room. Barnes is back already, I grant you permission to visit him. But Dr. Aadland will need to give you an examination, with or without the chair."

Kate nodded curtly and stepped past Sivil, heading through the lab into the corridor beyond and walking down to the small dorm rooms. There were ten of them, five on each side of the hallway, but only five were occupied.

Kate and Barnes were two of the occupants and had been there the longest of the group. Since both had been reported dead, they couldn't exactly have normal lives like some of the other super-agents out there. Those super-agents got to infiltrate the CIA, the FBI, NCIS, the DEA, ICE, Homeland Security, the Secret Service, and SHIELD, among others, including several foreign groups. Kate had to stay behind the scenes and collect everything off the books, illegally. And she had been fine with that. Besides, Barnes was a good partner. She needed him and he needed her.

The other three occupants were newer. Two were super-agents who were now reported dead, so they had to work behind the scenes like Kate and Barnes. In the process of "dying," they had been enhanced and now had quite the array of powers. The last occupant Kate didn't know; she had only seen him a couple of times. He was still in the experimental phase, a hybrid between a soldier and an agent, and when he wasn't in the lab or the experimental training hall, he was in his room. Kate had speculated, half-jokingly, that they probably kept him tied to his cot the whole time he spent in his room or something, as he wasn't allowed to interact with the other agents at all.

Kate reached her door, shoved it open, and walked inside. Her room was simple, a cot in one corner, a door leading into a tiny bathroom in the far wall, and a row of hooks for a couple changes of clothes and a rack for her sniper rifle. Automatically, Kate reached for the weapon hanging on her back and placed it lovingly on the rack. She'd lost her mask during her fall from the window.

Sinking down onto her cot, Kate placed her head in her hands, wondering if this was it for her. She enjoyed her work. She enjoyed being Barnes' partner. But she had also enjoyed her work with NCIS, and being Tony's partner.

Last night, after escaping from Tony and that wretched STRIKE agent, Kate had wandered the streets of D.C., keeping to the shadows, until she found her way to NCIS. There, she had perched on the roof of the building and stared down through the skylight at Loki, McGee, DiNozzo, and Bishop as they dozed at their desks. She missed McGee and DiNozzo, Abby and Ducky, and Gibbs.

I can't go back. I can never go back. Like it or not, you're one of HYDRA's super-agents now. There is no going back.

Kate lowered her hands, thinking about heading down to Barnes' room. Perhaps a talk with him would refocus her. Perhaps they could get another mission from Sivil. A difficult one, involving all of her skillset so her mind wouldn't have a chance to wander. Kate hated when it wandered.

Suddenly, her vision flashed ruby red before fading to black and Kate felt a shiver run down her spine. She couldn't see. She couldn't see. Her muscles tensed but there was nowhere to run if she couldn't see.

Yes, I can. I can always run. I may lose my way but I can always run.

Then her vision reappeared and she was staring at a man, walking down a dim hallway flanked by alcoves. Silent, square pools of water filled the alcoves, their water dark and holding the rippling reflections of the man.

I know him.

The man was that Asgardian NCIS agent, Loki Laufeyson, the war criminal from New York. He was younger here, his black hair short and combed back to lie smoothly on the nape of his neck, his tunics dark and subdued, with the exception being the gold collar lying on his chest. There was a seriousness about him, but there was also something different about his look, besides the alterations in hair and clothes. Something in his face, a different look than he had now, than he had five months ago on their first encounter.

It's like the weight on his shoulders now hadn't fallen yet. And whatever he's found with NCIS isn't there, either.

Loki continued to walk down the hallway, stopping only when he reached a pedestal holding a squat, rectangular object, glowing ice blue with darker blue lines etched in its surface. Grey handholds flanked its side, curving inward delicately.

Looking down at the object like it held dreaded answers, Loki studied it for a moment before bringing his hands up. As his hands neared the handles, he began to close his eyes, giving his head a brief shake as if to clear away his fear, and then curled his fingers around the handles, his eyes opening and flicking back and forth.

Slowly, he lifted the object, the tips of his fingers beginning to change color to a pale blue-grey. The color spread down his fingers to his palms and the backs of his hands and Loki stared at the transformation in disbelief, not quite believing what he was seeing.

"Stop!"

The voice rang in the hallway and Loki's eyes stilled as he heard the command. He froze, still holding the object, and then he spoke to the man behind him, not bothering to turn around. "Am I cursed?"

The reply came back to him. "No."

Slowly, Loki set down the object, settling it onto its pedestal with a small thud. He still kept his hands on it, though. "What am I?"

A brief pause before, "You're my son."

Kate had to think for a moment. Loki, brother of Thor, is the son of...Odin, right? Wait. Then why is he called Laufeyson when our files say Thor is called Odinson? Can Asgardians legally change their names?

Anyway, I'm going to assume Odin's speaking.

Loki dropped his hands away from the object and turned to face the speaker. His skin was now completely that shade of blue-grey, his eyes red, strange markings etched onto his face, over his forehead, across his cheekbones and nose. As he completed his turn, the color began to fade away from his skin, starting at his hairline and continuing down, erasing whatever had just happened completely. Before the blue-grey was completely gone from around his mouth, he spoke again. "What more than that?"

When Odin didn't respond, Loki began to walk down the hallway to where the speaker was standing on the steps leading up to the large golden door, gilded with a design resembling a tree. "The Casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jotunheim that day, was it?"

A look of sorrow passed over Odin's face and he glanced down. The father of the two Avengers had white hair descending to his shoulders, a white beard, and an eyepatch over his right eye. Kate looked for some resemblance to the NCIS agent but found none.

Maybe he just takes after his mother, then.

Loki continued walking in the silence, hard eyes pinned on his father. When he reached the base of the stairs, Odin finally answered him, his voice quiet. "No." After a brief pause, he continued, his eyes distant. "In the aftermath of the battle, I went into the temple and I found a baby. Small, for a giant's offspring. Abandoned, suffering, left to die. Laufey's son."

Ohhh. So that's why.

Loki's eyes had also taken on a distant look, as if he was seeing Odin's memory play out. There was sorrow on his face as he repeated, "Laufey's son?" and Kate could tell he was holding back his sorrow, his pain. The way he spoke the words, brokenly, the emotion behind his eyes, displayed a fear inside him that Kate recognized all too well.

He cast his eyes up to Odin, too afraid to hope the words weren't true, to think for one moment they didn't apply to him. Loki knew they did, and they cut like knives.

There was deep pain in Odin's eyes as he returned Loki's gaze, as if he, too, knew how much pain his son was in at this news. He just barely nodded as he said, "Yes."

Loki inhaled at the affirmation, looking away from Odin as the shock of the revelation scrolled across his face. The knowledge that you are no longer who you once were hit Kate too hard and she would have looked away too had she been capable of it.

Loki's breaths came quick as he struggled to get a grasp on his thoughts, on his words, and his eyes moved back and forth quickly, as if reading a tombstone, attempting to accept the fate of all life but failing. "Why?" he demanded harshly as he looked back to Odin. "You were knee deep in jotun blood. Why would you take me?"

Odin's voice was soft when he replied, his words riding on the tail of Loki's. "You were an innocent child."

"No," Loki cut him off, his breathing heavy as he fought against his emotions. "You took me for a purpose. What was it?"

There was a look on Odin's face, of deep sorrow. It was either he was stung by Loki's accusation or cut because his son had gotten to the truth so quickly. Kate didn't know which.

Loki took a breath in the silence, watching Odin, and then yelled, "Tell me!" His voice was rough, harsh, and it cut through the quietness of the hallway, anger in his expression as he demanded an answer. When his shout ended, the anger left but Kate knew she didn't mistake it; it was there, like hers had been and still was. But now she just saw the raw pain, the emotion, the little boy inside hiding behind the façade of adulthood.

Odin finally spoke. "I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day, bring about an alliance, bring about a permanent peace. Through you."

Loki's brow furrowed, his eyebrows twisting in confusion. He hadn't expected that, Kate could tell. He looked quite perplexed. "What?" He barely breathed the word.

"Those plans no longer matter," Odin said.

Loki stared at Odin in disbelief, tears starting to paint trails down his cheeks. "So I'm no more than another stolen relic, locked up, here, until you might have use of me?"

"Why do you twist my words?" Odin asked, in a way that suggested Loki did this often. Not the whole find-out-he's-actually-adopted scenario, per se, but the twisting-Odin's-words bit. Like Odin and Loki bickered quite often and Loki would find new meanings within the words to throw back into his father's face, thus prompting the question asked now, said more as a statement, Odin's voice filled with exhaustion and a touch of exasperation.

But that's what families and loved ones did: they fought. No one got along perfectly all the time; friction was inevitable. Kate and Tony often went from arguing over some small incident to watching each other's backs very quickly. No two people were ever in perfect agreement, and that was natural.

"You could have told me what I was from the beginning. Why didn't you?" Loki's words almost tripped over themselves in their effort to strike the air. His eyes were glassy with tears.

Sometimes you don't know that you were different in the beginning.

"You're my son," Odin said in reply. "I wanted only to protect you from the truth."

"What, because I-I-I-I'm the monster who parents tell their children about at night?" Loki stammered. Kate wanted to tell him to get over it. She wanted to let him know how little this moment was in the grand scheme of things. People find out they are monsters every day, and the world didn't stop spinning for them.

Then a new thought occurred to her. Well, theirs did.

Yet she herself remembered screaming at the scientist who had explained her transformation to her, told her about her glorious evolution, and she had called him foul names, unable to believe that she had become the monster she had given her life to defend against.

The worst part was the feeling of having no choice whatsoever, no say in the matter anymore.

"No," Odin started, beginning to sink down to sit on the steps, but he was interrupted by Loki continuing to rant.

"You know it all makes sense now, why you favored Thor all these years!" Loki's voice was infused with venom, his tone taking on all the anger that Kate had seen inside of him. It went from being sorrowful, almost heartbroken, to being filled with rage, poisoned by his wrath. "Because no matter how much you claimed to love me –" Loki began to move towards Odin again, walking up the stairs as he gestured to himself. His father reached a hand out to him, whispering something inaudible, but Loki ignored him, consumed by his anger. "– you could never have a frost giant sitting on the throne of Asgard."

Odin was lying on the steps, the hand he had stretched out to Loki still empty, Loki standing over him. The hand fell and Odin lay still, and Loki finally seemed to notice that something was wrong.

He crouched, his hands hovering over his father as if he didn't know what to do. Gently, he touched the back of Odin's hand, fear once more in his eyes as he grasped his father's hand, regret briefly moving across his face.

"Guards!" Loki called, in a voice of authority. "Guards, please, help!" His voice broke slightly then and the doors opened, the guards rushing in as Loki moved back from Odin's side.

Then Kate's vision went red.

****

Loki sat beside the table Bishop was sleeping on, the injured agent now clothed in a soft Asgardian dress, his hand wrapped around hers as he leaned his head against the edge of the cold table. Thor and Gibbs were sleeping, Gibbs on a second healing table with a roll of bandages under his head and Thor on the floor, his snores loud in the stillness. Gibbs didn't snore and Loki half wondered if he was even sleeping. Maybe Gibbs didn't need sleep; Loki wouldn't be surprised if he didn't and was just faking it for everybody else's sakes.

Bishop's breathing was rhythmic and it soothed Loki, but he couldn't sleep. Too many thoughts, too many fears plagued him tonight and falling asleep would only amplify them, especially the fear of losing Bishop. He couldn't dream about her dying, not after the scare was still fresh in his mind.

Loki moved his fingers across Bishop's hand, resting his fingertips on her wrist where he could feel her pulse. It was comforting to him to feel it, her life beneath his fingers, still there, still strong. He closed his eyes, able to confront the darkness behind his eyes with his lovely Ellie at his side.

The darkness vanished, becoming a vibrant ruby red. Loki's eyes shot open and he shoved himself up onto his knees, his grip on Bishop's wrist tightening. His breathing came hard as his vision blurred and streaks of red flashed across his eyes, splintering what he could see of the healer's chamber.

Loki waited for an attack, waited for something to happen, but the only thing that occurred was his body trembling. No attacks came, but the trembling and the unease continued. And the fear, nestled like a spike in Loki's heart, seemed to increase exponentially, burrowing ever deeper into his flesh.

The red tendrils continued to twist around in front of Loki, dancing and forming new shapes. Loki found himself on his feet, his gaze drawn toward his sleeping lover.

For a moment he felt warm, seeing Bishop at peace. Despite the bandages over her chest her expression was calm, her breathing was regular, and he could almost hear the rhythm of her heartbeat.

I love her so much.

Then the red tendrils began to crawl over Bishop's body, leaving bruises and wounds behind in their wake. The simple Asgardian dress she wore now became ripped, stained with dark blood, and the hilt of a blade appeared in her chest, sticking up in the air as the blood from her heart trickled out of the wound, tracing bright trails in its wake.

Loki couldn't find the breath to scream, to cry out to Bishop and beg her to stay with him. He was frozen, unable to move, unable to save his love. There was nothing he could do, absolutely nothing he could do to save her.

Anything is possible.

Even Ellie's death.

Sheer horror overwhelmed Loki and he felt like he was about to pass out. His head throbbed, threatening to split in two, and Bishop's skin grew paler and paler as the blood slowly drained out of her. And her face, her face was twisted in such silent, agonizing expressions that Loki struggled to scream again, but still couldn't. Even Bishop's own screams weren't allowed into the air, only bouncing around inside Loki's head where they were loud and yet all too quiet at the same time.

Then the red tendrils receded, disappeared, and Bishop was back to normal again. Slowly, Loki sank to the ground, utterly exhausted and frightened out of his mind. Gripping her hand in his again, he felt for her pulse and was relieved to feel it, steady and strong, beneath his fingertips once more.

Loki became aware of a presence standing behind him and glanced back. He was too spent to be shocked at the sight of Odin, and he didn't say anything.

"Loki," Odin said softly, stepping forward to stand beside him. Loki didn't look at him, kept his eyes trained on Bishop. "Loki."

"What?" Loki answered, his voice barely above a whisper.

Odin's hand brushed against Loki's shoulder and Loki involuntarily turned, shoving himself off the ground and Odin's hand fell from his shoulder. Loki was taller than his father and enjoyed looking down at him.

"There's something wrong with you," Odin stated quietly.

"Thank you for that," Loki said sarcastically, his words ending up sounding like something DiNozzo would say. "That's exactly what a son wants to hear from his father."

Odin shook his head, looked Loki in the eyes. "Why do you twist my words? No. There's some unearthly power inside of you and that is what is wrong. Not you yourself. Whatever is inside you."

"How did you know?" Loki asked him.

"I just saw it," Odin said. "I saw strands of it leave you, mold the room to what you most feared. Then it receded back into you, there to dwell until it is called forth again. It is unnatural, and wrong."

Loki glanced at his father, knowing that he was trying to help Loki. Perhaps they hadn't always gotten along well, but Loki choosing to fall from the Bifrost rather than accept the consequences of his mistake had broken their relationship just like Thor had broken the rainbow bridge, and Loki knew it was slow to rebuild, just like the Bifrost itself. But Odin tried, and Loki tried, sometimes, but progress was slow.

But it was better than nothing.

"What is it?" Loki asked quietly.

Odin frowned. "Something I thought was long ago destroyed."

/**/

I am so sorry for missing last week's update! I didn't mean to, but time kept getting away from me. But here it is, at last, and a long one at that! What did you think? Of Kate's narration, of her vision of Loki's past, of Loki's own visions?

Thanks for reading; I hope you enjoyed it!