After straining the spaghetti in the colander, I called to Alex and Jack that dinner was almost ready and to go wash their hands. I heard giggling from down the hallway. For once, they'd been playing nicely in Jack's room. They hadn't had one argument all day long. No tantrums from Alex lately. Things seemed to be looking up for our little family.

The drama with Joey was hard right now, but I knew it would pass. Though Lin was trying to get the story pulled, the damage had been done, but after the press had chewed on it for a week or so it would soon be forgotten. I knew it was bothering Joey, but maybe she'd gotten a good hard lesson out of it. The reality was that her father was famous and if she did stupid things it might come back to bite her in the butt in ways that other kids didn't have to worry about. Maybe that was harsh of me, but that's the way I saw it.

Lin finished up another phone call as he set out the silverware for our meal. He'd been on the phone all day with lawyers and his agent trying to get the stories taken down. One of the things that attracted me to him most initially was his strong commitment to his family. He and his parents were incredibly close and he had a massive extended family that he kept in touch with. Joey had been his whole world and he'd do anything for her. Now that the kids and I were in the picture, it seemed like his love only grew. He loved Elliott, Alex and Jack like they were his own kids and treated me like a queen. I knew how lucky I was.

He sighed and checked his watch as he tucked his phone in his back pocket. "Joey's still not back," he observed. "She's been gone almost an hour and a half."

I began pushing the penne noodles onto the plates evenly as I nodded. "She's been pretty upset," I observed. "I think she just needs some more time to herself."

"I told her dinner was at six when she left," he said, crossing his arms as he walked towards me in the kitchen. "She's always been good at being back on time for dinner."

"When she's had a good appetite," I pointed out. I glanced at him and I could tell he was trying to figure out whether to worry or not. "Well, why don't you text her? Or call her?"

"She doesn't have her phone," he reminded me. I winced a little as I poured on the marinara sauce. After adding some peas as a side, Lin took the kids' plates to the table as they scurried over happily. They climbed into their seats and Alex instantly reached for the parmesan cheese.

"Not too much," I reminded her. She had a tendency to completely bury any pasta with cheese. I got to deal with the digestive issues afterwards. I followed with Lin's plate and my own, setting them down on the placemats. We both sat down and began to eat quietly as the kids babbled. By the set of Lin's brow I could tell he was really starting to worry about Joey. We decided we'd wait until 6:30, then Lin was going to go to the park to look for her.

After dinner was finished, I told Lin I'd finish up the dishes because he was getting more and more worried. He found his shoes and headed out the door a little after 6:30 to look for Joey. His obvious concern was causing me to get nervous as well. Joey was a responsible kid for the most part, so this was definitely out of character for her to be over half an hour late.

I let the kids play a bit longer then corralled them into the tub for bath time. As I was drying them off afterwards, my phone rang with a call from Lin. I sent the kids to their rooms to finish drying and get in their pajamas as I walked to the balcony.

She wasn't there. He'd searched everywhere and had asked around local businesses if they'd seen her. Nothing. My heart started to pound, realizing we had a real problem on our hands. I felt cold and heartless for not worrying earlier. I started to pace, rubbing at my temple.

We decided I'd call Luz to stay with the kids after I'd put them down for the night. Luis and I would join him searching, along with some other friends in the area. It was too soon to file a missing persons report, so all the police could do was put out a bulletin to keep an eye out for her.

When I reached Fort Tryon Park, Lin and I filed off to walk up to Inwood Hill Park, a bit farther north from where we lived. Luis and some others began fanning out all over Washington Heights. It was already dark so it was getting harder to look and felt more hopeless.

"Joey!" Lin shouted for the umpteenth time, cupping his hands over his mouth. Our ears strained, hoping to hear an answer. At this point, our minds were paralyzed with worry. Was she hurt? Kidnapped? Dead? I was starting to feel physically sick.

At nearly midnight, there was still no sign of her. Lin was pretty much panicking. He'd been on the phone to his ex-wife, Clarita, in Chicago and she was worried sick as well. She cursed him for taking away her cell phone because it was part of keeping her physically safe. Lin was feeling more and more guilty.

"Lin, let's go home for the night," I tried to gently suggest to him just after midnight. "You're exhausted and it's the middle of the night. It'll be easier to search in the morning."

"Are you kidding me?" he gaped at me as we walked down Broadway, now near the Upper West Side. "I'm not going home until we find her."

"Lin, she might not-" I stopped myself, not even knowing how I might finish the sentence. He looked over at me, a confused look on his face as we walked quickly. We'd called the youth hostels in town but Lin wanted to personally check each of them. We were heading for Jazz on Lenox near Columbia University. Finally, he stopped, grabbing at my upper arm to stop me.

"Might not what, Pip?" he demanded, and I snatched away my arm, confused as to why he felt the need to put his hands on me that way.

"She could be anywhere, Lin!" I tried to reason with him. "This is like looking for a needle in a haystack. She doesn't want to be found right now."

"Doesn't want to be found," he repeated, pacing in place as he rubbed at the back of his head. "Philippa, she might be laying unconscious in a ditch right now for all we know," he said harshly. "And you want to just go home? I know she's not your daughter, but Jesus!"

"You think I'm not scared right now?" I asked him, my tone accusatory. He started to walk south past Frederick Douglass Boulevard. This was Harlem; not exactly the safest place at night. His silence spoke volumes. I scoffed and this time I grabbed at his arm to get him to stop. He turned to me, his eyes cold.

"If this was Elliott, you wouldn't rest until we found him," he said, his voice low. "Admit it."

I gaped, momentarily speechless. We rarely even acknowledged which kids were biologically ours. For three years now we'd been raising four children together like they were all our own. Now, in this time of high stress, maybe Lin's true feelings were coming out.

"I may not be her mother, but this is just as painful for me," I growled at him. "How dare you imply it isn't!"

"Pippa, you-" he stopped and fished his phone out of his back pocket. It buzzed with a call and he answered it without even checking the caller ID. "This is he," he replied, his eyebrows furrowed as he listened to whoever was on the other end.

"No, I did not authorize that charge," he said, with a look of hope on his face. "Where did you say the credit card was used?"

He pointed to my purse and made a motion with his hand like he was writing with a pen. I quickly realized he needed something to write on. I fished out a pen and my little notepad and handed it to him. He crouched on the sidewalk, taking down some information. He thanked the person and ended the call.

"She used her credit card in Pennsylvania," he reported, standing up. "Near Philadelphia. I didn't even think to check her credit card activity."

I felt a rush of hope sweep through my body. She was fine. She had run away. Well, that was the most likely conclusion and that was what we were both latching onto. Our argument forgotten for now, we quickly mobilized. We both made phone calls as we hurried to the nearest subway station. Lin called the police so they could get in contact with law enforcement in Pennsylvania. I called Luis and Luz to tell them the update and they started a phone tree to all the friends that had come to help.

Soon, we were home and Luz was hugging Lin tightly, crying with relief. We didn't know for sure that she was completely safe and unharmed, but everyone seemed to instinctually feel she was okay. Maybe Lin was right. She wasn't my biological daughter so maybe I didn't feel the same connection. My body couldn't sense for sure that she was okay. Did that mean I loved her less?

Other family members and friends began to stream in over the next half hour or so and get updates from police. Though it had been determined her credit card had been used near Philadelphia, they had yet to track her down. There would be no sleep in the Miranda household that night.

At some point, I laid down on the couch to rest my eyes and I must have ended up falling asleep. When I awoke to the sun streaming in through the window I'd been covered up with a blanket. Something in me sensed it hadn't been Lin.