Spock's Pov

Spock was a master at concealing his emotions. Even after the death of his beloved mother and the destruction of his planet, he did not allow his inner turmoil to show itself.

He was torn apart by her passing. Watching her tumble into oblivion had left a sinking hole in his chest. And while Mrs.Kirk had attempted to fill said hole and he appreciated her efforts, it could not be done.

He was a sobbing child on the inside, a child crying for his mother. But on the outside, he was still a relentless mask devoid of emotion or inner conflict. To the crew, he appeared entirely functional and trustworthy.

However, it was blatant to Spock that his sorrow had clouded his judgment.

Spock had just deported Jim Kirk off the ship after he caused a great disturbance on the bridge and challneged Spock as a Captain. But Spock had not stopped to think of his sister.

Said sister, was now standing near the entry of the bridge with her eyes scanning the room and its occupants anxiously, most likely searching for her now missing brother.

Dr.Mccoy took a step towards her in anticipation, his expression was visibly worried. Spock turned in his chairbto face her, maintaining his poise. Not revealing an ounce of the emotional storm brewing under his skin.

"Where's Jim?" Ferris asked, brushing her blonde hair out of her face. Her pale blue eyes were wide with concern.

Spock stood up, forcing his posture to appear normal and confident.

"Mr.Kirk engaged in a physical altercation after I declined his request to regain Captain Pike from the Narada," Spock explained, his tone as stiff as always. "I was forced to deport him off the ship to Delta Vega. He has landed near a StarFleet outpost but has not yet arrived there."

A wave of many different emotions washed across her features as she registered what he'd said. She took a step back and her breathing began to shallow. She swallowed deeply before speaking, her eyes becoming unfocused.

"Jim's gone?" She asked, this time quieter and with an emotion he could not label.

"Our monitors determine that he is still alive and traveling towards the outpost," Spock reiterated, but he had little hope that his word soothed her.

"Delta Vega is an M Class ice planet," Ferris stated, her gaze drifting to ground. Her hand went to her stomach as if she were feeling sick. "H-he could freeze to death o-or-".

She trailed off, unable to finish the sentance.

However, she was not incorrect. Delta Vega was a frozen M Class planet inhabited by only two carnivorous tribes and an extensive list of equally carnivorous wild life.

Spock could only assume that Ferris knew this as well.

"Ferris?" Dr.Mccoy asked tentatively.

Ferris didn't acknowledge him and instead her naturally composed pale blue eyes connected with Spock's. A fierce flash of anger flickered across her features.

She took a step forward as her expression turned murderous.

"You fucking son of a bitch," She hissed lowly as tears welled in the corners of her eyes.

Spock had anticipated anger but had not been prepared for how it would affect him. Her words only pried the hole in his chest wider.

"Ferris don't," Dr.Mccoy insisted from the side but his words fell on deaf ears as she began to close the distance between her and Spock.

Dr.Mccoy acted quickly and just as Ferris began to approach he intercepted her. Spock could only watch with a blank expression as Dr.McCoy wrapped his arms around her waist and heaved her away from attacking him. Spock wasn't even sure if he would have stopped Ferris. He felt it, deep down in his stomach, that he deserved it.

"Get off of me! Get off!" She yelled as the doctor held her back. She made an impressive struggle against the doctor, her limbs flailing wildly. "Let me go!"

Spock silently thanked Dr.McCoy for if she were to attack him, his confident guise would surely crumble.

"Ferris stop," Dr.Mccoy said with calm assertion.

"Stop!?" She exclaimed as tears now fell freely down the sides of her face. "Jim could die because of him!"

Mccoy did his best to usher the seething woman off of the bridge. He too was obviously conflicted. But he knew that order was necessary in such a uncertain and dangerous time.

"Have enough people not died today!?" Ferris exclaimed, now reaching a hysterical note.

Spock swallowed down the well of emotions that surged forward at the question.

Ferris dissolved into sobs as she disappeared from view with Dr.McCoy. The sound of her cries was cut off as the bridge doors closed leaving the room in an uncomfortable silence.

Spock took a seat in the captain chair and, for the first time, felt totally incapable of command. He said nothing for the next five minutes as his brooding thoughts plagued his mind. His emotions were threatening to consume him and there was a thin line of restraint holding it back from happening.

Spock barely noticed that Dr.Mccoy had returned until he approached Spock where he sat. Spock could only imagine where he had taken Ferris. What Dr. McCoy must have said to her as she cried.

"Permission to speak freely sir?" Dr.Mccoy asked, his expression blank but Spock noticed that his eyes were just a bit red as well.

"I welcome it," Spock replied, but the unmistakable all knowing tone had left his voice.

"Oh do you?" The doctor asked rhetorically and leaned closer. "I understand you have recently undergone serious trauma however the next time Ferris decides to attack you for launching her brother into space, I have no intention of stopping her."

Spock had expected this and nodded once.

The doctor had only stepped in because the chain of command had to be kept in these uncertain times. If Spock were to relinquish his command, there wasn't even a second officer to replace him. Spock's designated second officer was roaming a frozen planet.

"Is she- Is she alright?" Spock asked tentatively .

The doctor shook his head. "No. And unless Jim comes out of this unscathed, I don't imagine she will be after either," Dr.McCoy said, his tone worrisome. "I suggest you either apologize or talk to her or both before she decides to try anything else."

Spock nodded once and the doctor returned to his station.

Spock leaned his elbow on the arm rest and placed his fingers at his temple.

What had he done?