I say a little prayer for you ...

***

CHAPTER 26:

LIGHT SPEED

Tarben quickly explained how to climb up, what to do, and what not to do on the horse. In my panic, I missed half of it and didn't understand the other half. Desperate, I moved close to Lys and said, "If you don't throw me off, I'll bring you apples every day."

Tarben laughed. "Are you bribing my horse?"

Yes, I was, and Lys seemed perfectly happy with it. She shook her mane and extended her nose towards me as if to show her approval.

"So, trust only goes this far," Tarben said. For a moment, I thought he was upset, but his smile reassured me. He set the basket aside and helped me get on the horse. He pushed me up much more easily—and less terrifyingly—than I expected. And...

Wow!

I was now seeing the world from a whole new angle. Tarben handed me the basket to hold, then mounted his horse. Compared to me, his movement was as graceful as a ballet dancer's. Two seconds later, he was sitting behind me like a solid rock. When he reached for the reins, I was trapped in his arms. Despite the slight discomfort from our closeness, at least this way I couldn't fall off. I hoped.

"Alright Lys," Tarben said right in my ear. "Show your skills. We've got a lady to impress today."

"There's no need to show too many skills, really," I said, my voice quivering with fear. The last words came out as a hiccup because Lys sprang forward at Tarben's signal. The only reason I didn't scream was that I had stopped breathing. I was airborne, the world spinning uncontrollably around me.

I'm going to die, I thought. Again... No matter how many times I'd come back, I always seemed to find myself on this edge. Stupid Olive! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! It didn't take long to realize how well-trained Lys was and how skilled a rider Tarben was. But these facts didn't make me feel any better. I clung to the basket and wrapped my arms around Lys's neck. If she decided to throw me off now, she'd be entirely justified.

I vaguely heard Tarben saying something about staying calm, but I couldn't have been further from it. I barely noticed that we left the garden, passed the fields, and entered the forest. The rest was a blur of pink. I really did understand why Lys was named after light—we must have been close to light speed.

Please, at least don't go to the lake, I thought. Of course, Tarben, being a more experienced soul, wouldn't make such a mistake. Then we reached the the crossroads, and Tarben turned towards the lake. Stop, I wanted to scream. Don't, don't, don't, my heart pleaded. Monsters, water, death... My eyes darkened with the horror of my thoughts. As the lake came into view, I felt like a stone sinking into the ocean.

"Ta... Tar... ben..." I stammered.

I could barely hear my own voice, and Tarben kept heading straight for the water. A few minutes later, we were galloping along the shore. My hair was flying like a cape behind me. If I wasn't terrified this much, the view would have made my heart stop. The purple, pink, shimmering water was like a magical, giant mirror. Even though I kept expecting some hideous limbs to burst out of the lake and drag us under, the surface remained still and smooth like glass.

Ursa had said they didn't bring animals to the lake at night. The doors only appeared at night too. Maybe that meant the guardian slept during the day. Yes, that had to be it because minutes were passing, the shore was flowing beneath us, and nothing was attacking us. My body relaxed a bit, and my death grip on Lys's neck loosened slightly.

"Olive, look," Tarben said.

His head was almost on my shoulder, so I realized he was turning left. I forced myself to look in the same direction. It was hard, but I managed to open my eyes, squinting through the fear. And then I couldn't close them. My mouth fell open too. Above the water, among the pink clouds, fish were swimming. Sorry, flying. Or maybe... I don't know, they were in the air, but their movements were fluid like they were underwater. Their iridescent tails created a rainbow of pink, purple, and green across the lavender sky.

"Amazing, isn't it?"

I couldn't see Tarben's face, but his smile was in his voice. For a brief moment, I forgot my fear and all the potential dangers and smiled with him. Amazing was an understatement for this scene. Honestly, I wasn't sure any word in the dictionary could capture this miracle.

Meanwhile, we started circling the lake, leaning to the left. Before I could panic and grab onto Lys's neck again, Tarben wrapped his left arm around my waist, securing me in place. I felt relieved that I wouldn't fall, but the closeness was still a bit unsettling. I was sure Tarben had no bad intentions, but it was still a strange feeling. My experience with friendships, especially with guys, was almost non-existent, so my brain didn't know how to process this.

But before I could dive into a deep internal battle, Tarben had already pulled his arm back. We continued along the shore for a while. With my body a bit more relaxed, my eyes were on the sky and the flying fish. I watched their unique dance until Tarben steered us back into the trees. Luckily, our pace slowed again as we entered the pink forest. The slope wasn't steep, but I noticed we were climbing.

"Where are we going?" I asked. Unless Tarben knew a shortcut, we were moving farther away from the Dorm.

Instead of explaining properly, Tarben said, "Patience."

So, I had no choice but to be patient. The trees around us thinned out, and the flower-scented wind grew stronger. I'd never been to this side of the lake before. I wasn't even sure it was marked on the map we'd been given. But Tarben seemed completely sure of what he was doing. Even as the path grew steeper, he kept going. At some point, the slope made my body lean entirely against him. My abs were burning from trying to hold myself up.

Just as I was wondering how much longer this journey—and this torture—would last, the sky reappeared through the leaves. We were on a hill. In front of us was a clearing covered in pink grass with a majestic tree in the center. Tarben guided Lys under the tree and stopped. He dismounted, took the basket from my lap.

"We've reached the end of our journey," he said cheerfully. "Thank you for traveling with us." I looked at him, then at the clearing in surprise. When I turned back to him, he had his arms extended towards me. "Come on. You've earned a nice breakfast. Swing your leg over this way."

I did as he said, turned towards him, and slid off. He helped me land safely on the ground. I had to rub my sore backside. Considering all the other things I feared might happen, I should be grateful it was just this.

As Tarben thanked his horse, I took a hesitant step to the side. I froze when I realized we were meters above the ground. I hated heights, and now we were looking out over the endless waters that were visible from the mansion. The view was nearly identical. Maybe we were on an island, and Tarben had brought us to another corner of it. Or maybe in this dimensionless realm, all paths led to infinity.

"Where are we?" I asked, taking a few more steps back from the edge.

"This, Olive," Tarben said, crouching by the basket, "is my second secret spot. If anyone else at the Dorm knows about it, I've never run into them here. Considering how long the journey takes, I understand why the souls don't prefer it. Not everyone has a Lys."

Lys neighed happily, as if she understood. Meanwhile, Tarben had spread a cloth on the ground and started pulling food from the basket. I went over to help him. There was enough food for more than just two people. Tarben must have seen the look on my face because he chuckled.

"Blame the oven," he said. "I couldn't get it to stop this morning. It just kept giving. Must've known I had a guest."

Just like my wardrobe knew I'd be riding a horse, I thought. The realization made me uneasy. The Dorm predicting my every move felt like it was stripping away my freedom. But when Tarben motioned for me to sit and handed me an empty plate, I let the thought go. As we ate, I told him about the deal I made with Mars, deliberately leaving out the parts with Pam. Delving into those details felt like sharing a secret that wasn't mine to tell.

Mars's decision surprised Tarben enough as it was. Despite the help he had been giving me, he didn't expect such a move from Mars. We celebrated my success with strawberry milk and then drifted into our own thoughts, gazing at the view. Hanging out with Tarben, as always, was comforting. The wind ruffling my hair, the floral scent, the pink clouds... I took a deep, contented breath.

Tarben glanced at me and smiled. "Something tells me you're going to want to come here all the time."

I shrugged. "If you're okay with walking, why not."

He made a face. "It wasn't that bad."

"No, it wasn't," I admitted. "Actually..." I turned back to the lavender sky. "This might be the best thing I've done here so far. I think I finally get why you want to stay at the Dorm."

Tarben straightened up. When I looked at him, his face was serious. My words seemed to have surprised him. "Why do you think I want to stay at the Dorm?" he asked.

I thought for a moment. "You seem happy here," I said finally. "You're at ease. You don't care about classes or Blue not being around. You never talk about your past life."

His gaze dropped as if he was contemplating my words. I felt uneasy, thinking I'd made him uncomfortable. But before I could apologize, he said, "You're right. I don't want to leave because I don't know where I'd go." He tried to smile, but it was half-hearted.

I didn't fully understand what he meant, but I didn't want to push. It didn't feel right. We turned back to the view and watched in silence for a while. Then, suddenly, Tarben spoke again.

"Death was my choice."

I looked at him in shock. His eyes were distant.

"Unlike many souls here, I chose to end my own life," he said. "My sister... My twin sister died, and... staying there... wasn't easy. I think I wanted to go somewhere I could be with her." He shook his head as if he'd said something crazy, pulled his knees to his chest, and ran his fingers through his hair.

I turned fully towards him. "Tarben..." I started.

"I didn't know I'd end up here, of course," Tarben continued. "When I realized where I was, I thought that Towe would be at the Dorm too and we'd reunite. She was not... According to the Principal, unlike me, my dear sister's soul had finished with life and moved on. So, I was left here, wandering aimlessly. I don't want to go back to a world without her, and it's unclear where I'd go if I moved on. So... I'm sticking around for a while longer."

This time, I couldn't speak. I knew Tarben had shared something deeply personal with me. The weight of his trust settled on my shoulders. I wasn't sure what I'd done to deserve it, but Tarben kept going.

"Sometimes I think that's why the Dorm sent Blue my way," he said with a sad smile. "A troublemaker just like Towe... What she does, what she likes, even her illness..."

He fell silent. His head dropped again. After a moment of quiet reflection, he looked at me.

"But you're different," he said. "You're so different from us, Olive. You know what you want. You're not afraid. You fight." He smiled. This time, it was genuine. "Never lose that drive, okay? Maybe one day, you'll change us too."

This wasn't the first time Tarben had said something like this to me. He was sincere, I was sure of it. I wanted to believe him too, but the words of someone else echoed in my mind, challenging Tarben.

You think you can fix everything. Don't. You'll only end up disappointed.

That's what Mars had said. Who was right? Which of their words would come true? I didn't know. Still, I forced myself to smile back at Tarben and said, "I hope so."

Hope is a promise we unknowingly make to our hearts. And some promises, as Mars had said, can lead to great sorrow. I was about to learn this soon enough.

***

I leave here a broken heart for my beloved character Tarben and the sister he had lost. 💔

This chapter I gave you not one but two backstories,  Tarben and Blue. In time you will hear stories of other characters as well. Some sad, some even more sad. A soul stuck in limbo would not have a happy story I am afraid. 

But...

This doesn't mean we won't have fun at the Dorm :))) Next chapter Olive starts to go to classes -with her soulmate this time. Of course if Mars keeps his promise :p

Until then, take good care of your souls! Kisses, EC.