Kongpob

Today marks one month of Kongpob's release from hospital. Though he still can't do heavy work  but he is able to do his own daily chores without any help.

Wiping his still wet hairs with a towel , he stepped out of bathroom to wake Arthit up.

" Arthit ...." Sitting on the bed, Kong shook Arthit's shoulder.

"Nghh..." Arthit moaned in protest .

Kongpob again shook him " Wake up Ai oon.... You have class in an hour "

" Five more minutes. " Arthit grumbled in his sleep. Kong tugged in his hand , trying to lift him up in sitting position. Arthit didn't budge even an inch.

" Get up already, you will be late. " He warned, but to no avail. Sitting on the bed Kong grabbed his arms and  pulled Arthit in to sitting position by his arm.

" You are evil " Arthit complained opening his heavy lidded eyes .

Smiling, Kong placed a kiss on his forehead
" Now ? "

" A little less evil " Arthit answered his eyes still sleep probed and  half lidded.

Sliding close, Kong fisted Arthit's hair and tugged it back a little , exposing smooth milky column of his lover's neck to his eyes.

He placed a peck on Arthit's chin and trailed down to his neck, licking and sucking his way to Adam's apple. Placing a final kiss on his Adam's apple , Kongpob met Arthit's gaze

" now ? "

" I'm awake as fuck and you are still evil.. " Arthit answered pecking his nose.

" What did I tell you about swearing first thing in the morning ? " Kong chided .

Smiling wickedly Arthit propped up on his knees and leaned in till Kongpob could feel his breath on his left cheek. " I look forward to the punishment .... Daddy " Arthit whispered in his ear and instantly jumped down the bed, running for the bathroom..

" You come back here.....  ." Kong said with stern tone.

" Can't wate time hearing your lecture first thing in the morning ....I will get late.... Da- " Arthit yelled peeking from the door of the bathroom.

"How many times do I have to say don't say such words first thing in the morning ?" Kong asked exasperated. No matter how many time he tells Arthit to have pure and good thoughts in morning , he always cusses or do something pervy.

He could hear Arthit chuckling I'm the bathroom, sighing, he shook his head. Arthit won't stop his antics ever. Instead he seems to be exaggerating cussing and dirty talking since he had suggested not to do it first thing in the morning.

Smiling, Kong walked to the cupboard. No matter how much he is against it, he actually likes such gestures from Arthit.

Kongpob placed Arthit's ironed uniform on the bed and warmed up their breakfast.

After Arthit came out of the shower, they shared a breakfast which Prem brought to him earlier. Since they had returned from hospital Arthit's friend had taken upon themselves to see they get to eat breakfast in the morning, since Arthit wasn't a morning person, one of the friends brings them breakfast .

After the breakfast, Arthit put dishes in the sink and got ready for his lecture.

Lifting his bag, he  kissed Kong on the cheek  and slung his bag over his shoulder.
" I'll be back at 6: 30 , I have lab today "
Kong nodded.

He locked the door after Arthit went to Uni. He still can't attend his own classes, sitting for hours in a chair is still out of question.

Kong had decided to do an important thing today, that was to see what P'Nat had left for him in the necklace. All this month he didn't have enough courage to do so. He is amused at himself, the boy who didn't even cry at his own parents funeral was hyperventilating at smallest of emotional disturbances in these  last six months.

Now that his panic attacks have lessened to almost non- existent, he had decided it is time to face what lays for him in the box.

How unpredictable life is !  He had everything figured out, study his best, learn everything about programming , destroy Thaksirat, avenge his parents and then bring back the glory of Suthiluck name - simple.

Even after Nat's death , it was still same - study best, design games, destroy Thaksirat and bring back glory of Suthiluck name, he never thought about his life - what he - Kongpob wants to do ... He always thought of himself as a Suthiluck before Kongpob.

Then came Arthit, shaking whole foundation of his plans, his thought process. His plans morphed a bit - it was first time he started to think about living - living his life with Arthit.

Before Arthit, it didn't matter what he will face or what will become of him but now he wanted to be with Arthit, his heart started recognising selfless friendship and love that Arthit gave him, it started responding to loving touches, reciprocated the feelings and trust placed in him.

His plans were still intact. His life still clear and well planned , waiting for him to execute his plans.

In a single week he lost all that, his clear vision of desired future , his emmaculate plan - everything crumbled down to ground, mixing in to soil, becoming nothing.....

As soon as Thaksirat reentered his life , he didn't even know when land under his feet was snatched from him.

Within a week his life was turned upside down again, he lost someone of his own again - P'Sam. Just how many days he waited for P'Sam to come barging  in the hospital?

He imagined how P'Sam will scold him again - saying does he have rocks for eyes that he didn't listen sound of an approaching vehicle even if it was behind him.......he waited so long...without knowing Sam will never come again....at least not physically. He didn't even realise when Sam sacrificed himself.

Just how many times he had thought that Sam betrayed him ? ..... That he didn't care whether Kongpob was dead or alive.

He had kept all this in back of his mind,to process all of it later. From years - his parents death, Nat's death and now Sam's death, all these incidents were pushed at the back of his mind , to deal with it later some day.

Today is that day.

He still hasn't gotten over that one week which made him an orphan again. Without knowing he had came to be somewhat dependent on Sam for affection, After Nat's death , Sam was the only one who knew everything about Kongpob and still cared.  And within one week even that sliver of affection was snatched away from Kongpob.

Not that he is taking other people in his life for granted , Sam's sacrifice and his stay in hospital had humbled him for life.

If he hadn't been blind for revenge, if he would have atleast once questioned Thaksirat's motives, all this wouldn't have happened . He had sided with the real culprit behind his parent's death. All because of his blind desire for revenge.

Will he be able to forgive himself for that? Ever ?

Squatting on the floor, he pulled out his suitcase from under the bed and took out the necklace from the box which he kept in the suitcase.

He stared at chip, trying hard to think what Nat had left for him. A chip.

Placing the chip in a card reader, he connected it to laptop.

A video message, few pictures of actresses and a folder that demanded password. He wasn't surprised, it was Nat ofcourse.

Kongpob decrypted the pictures, years of bank statements of Chanagun stared at him. Proofs of transfers from Thaksirat's account to Chanagun's account. Amount being deposited has increase month by month.

He moved in to another proof, there were records of Chanagun staying in the same hotel as his parents, he stayed for a month.

There was a photo of visiting register of orphanage in Greece where Kong was kept in.
Prior to actually meeting him , Chanagun has officially  visited that orphanage at least five times! That means he knew Kongpob's location since the day he was put in orphanage. He was just waiting for Kongpob's mind  to be enough vulnerable to fall prey to his vile plan.

And Kongpob played right in to his hand.

How idiotic!

Next were some contact with name and photos, Kongpob vaguely remembered some of these names. His father's friends. How did P'Nat even got those ?

Shaking his head to clear his mind, he focused in breaking the password of the folder.

His eyes almost fell out of his socket seeing next document. Suthiluck's original will. There was another document attached to it - signed affidavit of the lawyer, saying he was trusting these papers in Nat's hands since he couldn't protect them anymore.

He didn't know for how much time he  stared at his father's signature on the papers. A lone tear trickled out of his eyes.
He suddenly realised he didn't even have the comfort of visiting their graves. Sniffling he wiped his eyes, refusing to break down in sobs.

Previously he used to turn his sadness, grief , despair and tears in to fuel , it propelled him in to thinking and planning his revenge with new vigor. Now, even that motto was snatched away.... He felt lost in dense forest of life. He didn't know which route to take.... Which route is right?

He had walked on wrong route all his life thinking that was right..... He thought as a Suthiluck it was expected of him ....Now that life had proved him thoroughly wrong he didn't know which way to turn in to.

He didn't want another wrong turn in his life.

But what is right ? Who to turn to ? There was no Nat , Sam or his parents to guide him on to right one. There was Arthit.... But he didn't want to be more of a burden than he already turned out to be.

Realising he was again falling back on to his old habit of distrusting people and keeping them at arms length , he furiously wiped his tears with back of his hand. He will figure out on his own..... He will. He won't be distant from anyone but he must figure out his path on his own.

And he will.

Only one thing remained ... The video. He didn't know if he had strength to face Nat, even in a video.

After reading Sam's letter he realised how much he had disappointed the male who thought of him as his own son. Nat taught him everything he knew to make a lighthouse out of it , he hoped knowledge would become the beacon of light guiding Kong to right path. Instead Kong tried to make  a weapon out of it.

Sniffling, Kong pressed his finger on the play button. Nat's face illuminated the screen

" Hey kiddo, " Nat waved his hand through the screen.

"I don't know if you have seen other things I have left you or not. If not, see them first. "

Video paused for ten seconds " You are watching this message means either you have destroyed Thaksirat or you have no intention to go ahead with your plans. You have already seen the evidences,you are smart to figure out what it means. Your will is in my locker, whose key is in my apartment, bedroom drawer, the hidden one.

Now, that we have addressed the formalities 
The question is how do you want to go ahead with your life?  Now, that you no longer have the revenge keeping you awake at nights, you must feel lost and aimless.
I won't tell you how to go ahead with your life, not this time. It's your own path, you will have to carve it out, bear the consequences of your own choices, so choose wisely.

You are a determined person Nong , once you set your mind on something you achieve that.

No matter how much darkness you are in, no matter how lost you feel don't give up.

Let me share the quote, the words that kept me going , no matter how hard times were ...

" start from where you are,
with what you have
Make something if it
And Never be satisfied "

You will be okay.... You will do great.
( Nat gave him a thumbs up )

Take care of yourself
Live life.. do not just exist

You don't know which moment will be your last .... So love with an open heart..

Remember, though not in body but Phi is always with you ....

Such a cry baby .....
Wipe those tears .." 
( Nat shook his head lovingly and waiied him , as if saying good bye )

Screen went black, Kongpob stared at it, his hands still folded in Waii. He couldn't hold back tears anymore.

I won't tell you what to do, not this time.

Nat's word rang in his mind. He had twisted Nat's  word in to opposite meaning last time.  Guilt was eating him alive.

He put the laptop aside and curled up on his bed, for hours he just laid on the bed crying in to his pillow till all the tears dried. He had long way ahead and no time to shade the tears...

After three  hours he stood up, washed his face in the bathroom , closed his laptop and left his room, locking it behind him.

He climbed down the stairs and walked in the small garden in their dorm whose tree he always used to climb to enter his room. Leaning his back against the trunk , he sat under the tree giving his life a thought - a once over.

Yes, he had real will of Suthilucks but no property to claim to, with death of Thaksirat everything went to trust. He had all the evidences  and contacts against Chanagun,to atleast file a case, but there was no Chanagun to put behind the bars. He has realisation that he was wrong, he now knows the path he should have taken but he was not left with any way to reconcile or to correct his mistakes. He had no way to make it up to the people he wronged.

Life has once again thrown him in to a totally new universe, he doesn't know anything of, it's just resembles his previous world. Except few people , nothing is familiar. Even he is not familiar to himself anymore.

He weighed his options, even after hefty advance cheque P'Sam has written to the hospital, there were still three lac baht remaiming. Three months and a week stay in  I.C.U wasn't cheap and his panic attacks had made the situation worst and bills to pile up even more.

After draining half of his savings from tutions and inherited 50000 sum which had amounted to 75000 baht with interest, he still had two lacs to pay up. 

While Arthit had pleaded him to let him talk to his parents, Arthit's mother herself talked to Kong about paying bills, saying he could pay them back later, Kong wasn't ready to take more kindness than he already gained from Rojanapat family.

Wisit's father had paid advance tution fee for a year , that means Kong was still under  75,000 debt of hospital . His only relief was  hospital had agreed to take monthly installments.

Continuing college was out of option now, he already had a degree, he needed a job to pay back the hospital and then save the amount P'Sam had spent for his hospital bills. He decided he will donate it to charity in P'Sam's name.

Walking back to his dorm room, he was clear about his life and lifepath. It's time to once again rise from ashes.

No matter how many time life knocks him down without a warning, he will stand up , again and again...... Like an ant who climbs the wall with the load ten times her weight  on her back ....... She too fall and falls again... but she doesn't give up till she reaches her destination .

His vision is clear .

His first game phoenix - is yet to be finalised.

The world is yet to know about one  Kongpob Suthiluck.

His story is still untold.......

There is no rest till every household knows his  name  - Kongpob Suthiluck . 

Life is continuous walk, he will walk even with blisters on his feet.

Yes, he didn't  have it easy.... He may never get anything easily.......

He doesn't want anything easy......

Life is a war every minute and every second...
And he is ready.....

Like many youth , one Kongpob Suthiluck walked to his dorm with determination to rose above his difficulties ....

Eyes ablaze with dreams of future
Mind drunk on passion
Heart hardened with reality
Feet full of blisters of past ....

A pair of feet walked towards the future....

Crawled toward the beam of light , seeping in to the darkness of his world .....

He vowed to have it all.....

He promised himself  to make a name ....

A new journey started today ...
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What do you think of this chapter ?

A/ N : I hope this chapter clears out why I ended the way I ended Thaksirat and Chanagun's chapter.
Many a times something happens that turns out lives upside down.... Leave us thinking how it happened.... Only way is to accept it and cope up and get over it.... Carve new paths and walk new roads... I wanted to highlight that in this story.

More chapters are to come....stay tuned.

Thank you for being patient with me .

❤️Lots of love to all the readers❤️