Today I don't love you.
Today I feel the urge, the wish, the obsession
to touch and feel and inhale your existence vanish.
Just in a blink of the eye.

After crying about you
Already too aware of
An impossible possibility
I still wept more,
I hate when you look my way
or when the rainstorm took my heart away.
There, I suppose is no meaning now
To keep bleeding under my ever changing chameleon heart.

Today I fell in love again.
I fell in love with your presence,
I fell in love with your company,
I only ever looked your way when you asked me to.
It feels different having you up so close.
Like an accomplishment,
But a hollow .
For there remains nothing to achieve there after.

Today I don't love you,
But your idea.
Isn't it what makes each other of us
attractive?

our ideas.

However, sitting in that classroom
Of our previous grade and you
Beside me, made me feel nothing.

On some days you establish
your presence in my head
for an entire day, or probably week
Or probably till periods that I loose track
While on some days you never show up,
But at nights where our past
and you, dig up their graves
and roam in the emptiness of my mind
only to vanish in the morning again.

But today my heart assigned
to love you is as a corpse as I am.
But today my mind is head over heels
and captive by your idea and your thought

But today....
But...
But it boils down to the fact
I am realized of the truth.
I am realized of the reality.
that you are just an idea.
and I, its slave,
On my knees, chained
handed with a pen to scribble
my love over all material.

My heart on my sleeve beating,
Weakly on the verge of giving up
Circulating my sorrows and knots
and anxiety and thoughts,
I write to you this.
I write to you in my imprisonment
I write to you fallen
I write to you this poem