/CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE/

ωнєи тнє ѕιℓєи¢є ιѕи'т qυιєт
αи∂ ιт fєєℓѕ ℓιкє ιт'ѕ gєттιиg нαя∂ тσ вяєαтнє
αи∂ ι киσω уσυ fєєℓ ℓιкє ∂уιиg
вυт ι ρяσмιѕє ωє ωιℓℓ тαкє тнє ωσяℓ∂ тσ ιтѕ fєєт
αи∂ мσνє мσυитαιиѕ
вяιиg ιт тσ ιтѕ fєєт
αи∂ мσνє мσυитαιиѕ.

ⓐⓝⓓⓡⓐ ⓓⓐⓨ

(DEDICATION : Opurum_ SHE KNOWS WHY!!! 💋💋💋🌺🌺🌺🌺)

(SONG: What song is on your mind? Play it)

~CHASE~

It was Saturday already and i sat down at the reception in Miss Claire's office, Claded in a blue long sleeves, a long jean, and with my hoodie laying lazily on the adjoined sit. I awaited for Miss Claire to call me in and I was getting pretty annoyed, losing my patience, because it was unlike Miss Claire to delay during an appointment especially since she was the one who invited me over, but from what I had seen she looked really busy because she was on her phone since I arrived.

She finally came out of her office and I stood up immediately, finally happy that she would attend to me, she smiled at me.

"I'm so sorry for the delay Chase, let's go in now." She said and I grabbed my hoodie from where it laid, and as I was about to follow her inside I heard her call out a name. "Leo!"

I was confused as to why she called the name, then I followed her gaze and it landed on a boy. He looked around my age, he was also tall but not as tall as me. He smiled as he made his way towards us.

"Aunt!" He said facing Miss Claire's, which made me wonder if the guy was miss Claire's nephew, then it clicked - maybe he was the 'Leo' Miss Claire usually spoke about, her nephew whom resided in Rivers State. I looked at the boy as him and Miss Claire just kept smiling at each other, then I fixed my gaze on the floor because I felt like I was staring too much.

"Chase, my nephew Leo." Miss Claire introduced him to me while I removed my gaze from the tiled floor and faced her nephew. "Leo, this is Chase. I think you both would make good use of your company." Miss Claire said afterwards her phone rang suddenly interrupting the introduction moment.

I watched as she picked the call, it seemed serious just like the remaining calls she had been picking earlier. I looked away from her to the direction of her nephew, he looked innocent, pure and different from what I had heard about him from Miss Claire. He honestly didn't look like someone who smoked.

"Excuse me!" Miss Claire said suddenly gaining my attention, "Sorry, I have to leave you guys to yourselves." then she left leaving me and her nephew together.

I watched as her nephew sat down on the adjoined chair looking bored. I was also tired of standing, so I went to seat beside him and laid my hoodie across my lap. I never walked around without my hoodie, it was like my favorite piece of clothing, not because it fitted me nor was I trying to make a fashion statement. The only reason why I only wore hoodies and long sleeves was because of the numerous scars on my body, so I was trying to hide them away from the public eyes.

The hallway was quiet, but not the uncomfortable type of quietness, it was just quiet. I brought out my phone from my pocket and checked the time, it was just 12:34pm. I was getting bored and tired of waiting then I decided to play a game on my phone but I got tired of the game as soon as I started, then I looked at my side and saw Leo on his phone then I decided to start a conversation to keep me from thinking.

"Do you think she would be back soon?" That was the first thing I could think of while trying to start a conversation. Honestly, I didn't know how to start an appropriate conversation.

"Uhmmmm izuvsgajagajaga." that was what I heard him say, like he was speaking German.

"I didn't get that." I told him because whatever he had said at first didn't make any sense.

"I can't tell." Leo finally replied in a language that I could understand.

"You are her nephew right?" I asked, even though I knew he was.

He responded, calmly. "Yes, Leo."

"I know, I've heard your name a dozen of times." I told him because indeed I'd heard his name numerous times without number. Miss Claire always telling me how he battled to quit smoking and all that. "Heard you have stopped smoking too. Was it hard? How did you do it so easily?" I asked him because I was really curious, he was able to quit smoking easily while I found it very difficult to quit.

He didn't answer as he kept looking at me with an expression I couldn't really explain - maybe he was shocked that I knew he smoked? I don't know, or Maybe he was disappointed at Miss Claire, his aunt, for rattling him out? Maybe. So I decided to clear the air.

"I know right?" I told him. "She didn't mean it that way, she only told me so that I would also stop smoking." I added.

"What else do you know about me?" Leo asked chuckling.

"Nothing," I said to him honestly. "Don't worry this is a safe space. You can tell me anything." I told him trying to mimick Miss Claire.

And he laughed, leo was really laughing, a full blown laughter, but I couldn't bring myself to laugh, instead I smiled.

"So what made you start smoking?" I asked him after his laughter had subsided.

He looked at me as if debating if he should answer my Question, his demeanor changed and I felt like I shouldn't have asked him that question.

"I totally understand if you don't want. . ."

"No, don't worry it's nothing like that," he interjected me and removed his gaze from me, he looked at the wall in his front as if studying it, before he rubbed his temple. He looked as if something was bothering him just like my own guilt was eating me. "It's due to emotional stress," he replied still staring into nothing or maybe he could see something that I couldn't see.

I nodded and decided to mind my business because he looked sad and bothered. . .

"What about you?" I looked at him wondering what he meant, then he smiled. "Why did you start smoking also."

My world paused.

Why did I start smoking? I could never tell anyone. What I did was disastrous, and smoking was the only way that I could keep myself. . .my world from falling apart. . .

"Why did you start smoking?" He asked again and I could hear my breath coming out in strokes as the memories of what had happened began playing in my head.

HER. . . SHE!

HER. . . SHE!!

HER. . . SHE!!!

I stood up from the chair I was seated, not minding my surroundings anymore. I was hyperventilating, the memories in my head playing non-stop. I saw her but I didn't want to see her, I was scared of what she might do to me, then I felt a touch on my back.

Slowly, I looked back and it was her again standing in front of me and it wasn't a dream, it was reality. Maybe she came for me, maybe she wants to. . .! I held unto my head, my whole world was turning around as I remembered the memories I didn't want to remember. The memories. . . they kept surging into my head. Replaying at intervals. Everything seemed surreal. She wasn't meant to be near me. I was beyond scared and perplex.

"Chase," I heard her call and I fell to the floor holding my head as tears escape from my eyes.

She shouldn't be here!

I don't want to remember.

She shouldn't be here!!

I don't want to remember.

Those were the words that were playing in my head, because I just wanted her to leave me alone. TO LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE.

I cried. "Please, please," I pleaded with her. "Please just leave me, please," I continued pleading with her and closed my eyes tightly because I couldn't bare to see her face, all over again.

"Chase! what's wrong," I heard someone say. "Aunt! Aunty!" A male voice shouted while I laid on the floor with my eyes closed tightly.

I felt someone raise me up and my tears came down in torrents. I shouted. I shouted for her to leave me alone, but she didn't.

"Chase, cool down," I heard someone say, and the voice sounded like that of Miss Claire. "Cool down chase, it's me, Miss Claire. It's me," she continued to say as she patted my back and I found myself relaxing into her arms, but I couldn't bare to open my eyes because I was scared that I would see her.

"Open your eyes, Chase," I heard Miss Claire say, but I still couldn't bare to open my eyes. I was scared. Really scared, afraid to see her face. "Chase, I promise I'm here so just open your eyes."

I decided to give in, so, I opened my eyes slowly, and I saw some blurry figures right in my front, then I opened my eyes fully to meet both the faces of Miss Claire and her nephew, Leo. I sighed in relieve when I saw it was them - while Miss Claire and Leo helped me stand on my feet, before I was helped into her office with the help of Leonardo.

I was assisted to lay on her three sitter Ankara chair, while Miss Claire sat on her chair and Leo sat opposite her.

Talking about Leo, since I opened my eyes he kept looking at me with an expression that I couldn't exactly decipher, and I had noticed from our earlier meeting that his countenance was really unreadable, you could hardly know what his thoughts were.

"What happened?" Miss Claire asked facing Leo.

"I just asked a question," I closed my eyes tightly because I didn't want to relive that moment. "And he had a panic attack."

"Which question?" Miss Claire asked while I tried to pretend like I was lost in my own world.

"I just asked why he started smoking," Leo answered and I heard Miss Claire sigh heavily.

"Leo, we would talk later but please can you excuse us, I need to talk to chase," she said, and I opened my eyes just in time to see Leo walk out of her office. I stood up from the chair I laid on and went to sit opposite Miss Claire, the chair where Leo was seated earlier. Miss Claire just kept looking at me without saying anything, then she broke the veil of silence. "Chase is there something that you're not telling me?"

That question echoed in my head for like a million times.

"Chase is there something that you're not telling me?"

She should had known everything. I thought my dad had told her. . . or Maybe he didn't. Maybe he didn't tell her the whole truth but I decided to ask her. "What did my dad tell you about me when he came to meet you to be my therapist?"

"He just said that you experienced something you weren't meant to," she said and my eyes widened in realization that Miss Claire knew totally nothing about me, she had zero knowledge about what really went down on that day, no wonder my therapy session weren't really helping for a whole three years now. "He also paid a huge amount of money to me to just treat you without asking any questions." she added.

And I smirked. I actually smirked. So my dad, Mr Femi Chase Fayeni never told Miss Claire the whole truth. He didn't tell her what I'd done, well, at least that explained why my therapy sessions with Miss Claire weren't really that effective.

"Chase, seriously look at me," I looked at her and didn't fail to notice the skeptical look on her face. "Is there something that I'm not aware of?"

I shook my head and tried to force out a smile - which I was pretty sure didn't show.

"Chase what did you do?"

That question, it brought back memories again but I was quick to lock it out and hide everything beneath the huge grin i threw to miss Claire. She nodded and didn't say anything again.

So Miss Claire doesn't know anything. . .three years.

"Anytime you want to open up to me, Chase, just know that I'm always here for you, because I can't help you if you're hiding a piece of information from me, I really can't," I nodded, not really considering what she'd said because I wasn't even aware that Miss Claire knew nothing about what had happened. "Leo, you can come in now!" she yelled and I looked at the door just in time to see Leo walk in and his eyes fell on me like he could see through me but just like the normal Leo that I had come to know, his visage still remained unreadable.

He settled down near me, then stretched Something to me. I looked at his hand and saw that he was stretching my hoodie to me, so I collected it, told him 'thank you' before wearing it, then i returned my gaze to Miss Claire who now had a smile on her face. She jammed her hands together and brought out a laptop and faced it to us, surprisingly on the screen was written - 'THE REPERCUSSIONS AND DANGER'S OF SMOKING.'

I smiled and closed my eyes while Leo groaned near me, then I heard him laugh and believe me his laugh was so contagious that even Miss Claire and myself joined in the laughter.

"Seriously aunt!" He exclaimed after we all stopped laughing. "What is this for?"

"Well, I purposely brought you two together because I know you guys smoke. . ."

"Aunt! you know I stopped." Leo cut into her speech.

Miss Claire looked at him with one of her eyebrows etched upwards. "Are you sure? I know it could be difficult. This is a safe place."

Leo didn't answer and this time his facial expressions changed and I was able to read it. He looked guilty. So, he did take it sometimes.

"If you both aren't comfortable having this conversation with each other. . ." Miss Claire suddenly started. "We can. . ."

"I have no issue with it."

I added against my will. Honestly, I didn't have any issue with it, because it was the least of my problems anyway.

"You two are going to watch this video because I was up all night preparing it, and I hope that after this video you both would know that smoking isn't really good for the health and smokers are liable to die Young." After that small speech of hers, She hit the play button and the video started playing.

Watching the video was all fun as me and Leo were able to talk and relate, Miss Claire even shared some jokes with us. Leo told me somethings about himself, his school, and I also told him about myself, leaving out lots of important things, maybe they were the irrelevant things. We spoke about lots of things and life generally and he was carefree and honestly I couldn't say if I liked him, but what can I say; I hardly like people but I think I could relate a whole lot with him. We even exchanged numbers.

"So may we meet again. . ." Leo said as we shook hands.

I smiled and nodded, "We can never say."

He smiled, nodding along also and I waved at him before entering into my car.

Immediately I got home the first thing I did was to pull off my hoodie, went into my bathroom and stood in front of my mirror, I rinsed my face and stared at myself as the memories of my panic attack at Miss Claire's office came rushing back into my head, also Femi. . .yes, Femi. For some reasons I thought about him, but thankfully I was quick to clear every thoughts about about him and focus about her.

It wasn't her, it couldn't had been her_ I thought, rinsing my face again. My heart began to speed rapidly, uncontrollably and I felt. . .I knew I was about to have another episode of a panic attack. I went through the cupboard in my bathroom, searching through it quickly. I was looking for my drugs, my anti-anxiety drugs. It'd been long since I used them, but I sure new that they were there, somewhere inside the cupboard and finally, I found them; my diazepam (Valium), alprazolam (Xanax), lorazepam (Ativan).

I brought out the three plastics of drugs and poured them out unto my palm, disregarding the fact that it might had been an overdose. Also, not caring about the required amount the doctor recommended, because I was running out of breathe. I poured the pills into my mouth and chewed on it quickly before rushing over to the basin, opened the faucet and rushed water into my mouth.

I fell to the floor, my breathe was becoming normal but I wasn't.

She shouldn't be here!

I don't want to remember.

She shouldn't be here!!

I don't want to remember.

I ran my hands through my hair, stood up and went over to my room. I needed something to get my mind off my mind and I knew just exactly what could do, even though Miss Claire had tried scaring me out of using it, I didn't care because there was nothing life was offering me anyway.

I picked out a roll out of its box lit it and kept it in between my mouth. I inhaled the content and instantaneously, my mind was stable, peace was regained.

Nothing a stick of cigarette couldn't solve.

🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺

α/n

DISCLAIMER ❌: SMOKING IS DANGEROUS TO THE HEALTH, IT SHORTENS ONES LIFE SPAN AND CAUSES CANCER OOO. PLEASE WHATSOEVER IS WRITTEN IN CHASE POV ARE HIS OWN THOUGHTS AND DOESN'T IN ANYWAY DISPLAY THE AUTHOR PERSONAL LIFESTYLE. CHASE AND PARTY ARE WAY DIFFERENT. I ALSO DO NOT TRY TO ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO SMOKE.

TANKYU.💚💚

➪➪➪ Another chapter done and dusted ✔

➪➪➪i'm really happy that we are progressing and very soon we'll know what is really wrong with Chase.♔♔♔

So we met Miss Claire's nephew, Leo, what do you guys think about him? 😩

And yes, Leo is a character in Wendy's CONFLICTED. Our own bad boy there. If you're reading CONFLICTED, I'm sure y'all know that Leo is the rising Star and almost everyone's favourite 🙄 well apart from me, because my favourite is. . . WENDY KNOWS 😁😁

We all can agree that CONFLICTED is a banger🔥, and if you ain't reading one of my current favourite book on wattpad, you're are surely missing.

Aiiiit next chapter coming up soon. I'm trying to update the next chapter quickly, because it's more like a filler chapter but the next chapters after that are the real deals. 💚💚💚🙈

TOLA AISH 🌺 BOOK RECOMMENDATION: CONFLICTED BY Opurum_

STORYLINE (I won't be giving out much): YOU LOVE HIGHSCHOOL STORIES? THEN I'M CERTAIN YOU'D ENJOY THIS A LOT. NOT ONE, NOT TWO, NOT THREE, BUT NUMEROUS LOVE STORIES OCCUPIES THIS BOOK, REGULAR TEENAGERS CRISIS, LOTS OF BAD BOYS (I'M CERTAIN YOU'LL LIKE OR HATE NATHAN OR JAYDEN, PERHAPS LEO OR JASON OR ASHLEY. . .OR NENGI. . .OR XAVIER. . .OR THREE INCHES😂😂😁) . TOPICS RANGING FROM SEXUALITY, TO RAPES, TO MENTAL HEALTH, TO CHALLENGES TEENS FACES ARE ALSO TOUCHED IN THIS BOOK, SO NOT ONLY WOULD YOU LAUGH AT THE HUMOROUS NATURE OF THE BOOK, BUT I'M SURE THAT YOU'D ALSO TAKE HOME SOMETHING'S FROM IT. THIS BOOK WOULD ALSO KEEP YOU ON YOUR TOES. YOU THINK YOU CAN PREDICT THE ENDINGS TO BOOKS? WELL, TRY THIS AND I BET THAT ALL ACTIONS WOULD TAKE YOU OFF-GUARD.😂😂

#HIGHLYRECOMMENDED

TANKYU Wattpadis. Tankyu.

I WOF YOU all.💗♔♔♔

🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺