One Different Day
-•-•-
She walks through the tall open gates
into a world, she should not belong in
"Such a different day today," the sun beams down at her.
She agrees.

We reach William's home quicker than I thought we would. Having my eyes on the meter all throughout the drive proves to be a good idea because as soon as the cab stops, I quickly hand the driver the fair and screaming a thank you, jump out of the cab and towards the large, closed gates for the house.

I'm not sure if I press the bell at the gate or I very well near destroy it with my index finger as I push it for the second time.

I'm freaking out. I won't lie. The last thing I want today morning is to see Isaac panic just because he thinks his mother has left him again. I don't abandon people. I've never abandoned anyone.

"Oh! Miss, it's you," a sarcastic sounding voice says and I turn towards the speaker with surprise. It's the male help who was sizing me up last night.

"Yes, it's me. Can you please open the gate?" I replied as kindly as I can, deciding to ignore his tone. I really don't have time to ask him why he's upset with me so soon. He's just met me last night after all'!

"Sure," Ren replies, unlocking the gate and dragging it open. Feeling grateful I step inside immediately.

"We just thought that you had run away again," the boy adds bitterly as soon I take a step in.

I'm surprised. The maids think that I'm Isaac's real Mum. The one that abandoned him. Instantly I understand why I'm being treated this way. The help must hate my guts!

"Hurry in then. The son you left again last night is still asleep,"

For a second as I begin to contemplate if I should just tell him the truth, or just let him hate me for the rest of my life in place of someone else.

I sigh.

"I'm sorry. That decision was wrong. Isaac won't be let down this time,"

I nod to myself silently. Yes, that sounds about right. I'm neither lying about assuming William's ex-wife's identity, neither am I lying about anything I am saying. I don't have any intention of letting Isaac down after all.

"Hmph!" Ren makes an expression of snotty dislike, "We'll see."

"Miss! Good morning, Isaac is still asleep," Another woman approaches me as we enter the large house. I remember her from last night, she was one of the women near the bed.

"Hello," I reply softly, taking in her thickly accented English I wonder which part of Asia she is from.

As I begin walking behind her, I take in the way she's dressed. The elegant looking woman is dressed in a knee-length dark blue dress and her slightly graying hair is pinned back carefully away from her face. I can't help but want to treat her with the utmost respect.

"I was just preparing little Isaac's breakfast," she informs me as she continues to lead me towards the kitchen.

In the light of the day, the house looks even more fragile and immaculate. The gray, neutral and golden colour tone sprinkles the sense of fortune and taste into the whole house and I begin to wonder how Isaac feels at home in a house that does not even have a single plant.

Still, I focus on the more important things — deciding that I could always get a plant or two for Isaac's room later.

"Erm, I'm sorry ma'am, I don't think I caught your name?"

The woman lets out a bark of a laughter, "Ma'am? Please! Call me Mary! I'm little Isaac's nan."

"Oh," I felt myself blush, a foolish grin on my face. I should have known the moment she said that she was cooking for Isaac.

"Well... erm Mary, can you please tell me more about Isaac?" I ask softly. Trying to keep my words as low as possible in case the other maids hear and decide to hate me even more.

"You want to know what he likes and dislikes?" Mary looks up at me with an eyebrow cocked up, her hand still chopping away at the onion, "You're already more attentive then his mother was."

I feel my heart jolt in my chest. There is actually someone in the household that knows I'm not his actual mother?

"Why don't the others know I'm not his mum?" I ask, again in a hushed tone, as I take a seat on the high stool and lean forward on the beautiful white and gray granite island.

"She was always out before six in the morning and only came back home after midnight after they left,"

'Then how does she know her?' I begin to wonder as I look at the woman carefully, contemplating if it would be appropriate to ask her this.

I don't have to.

"I know you're not her because I'm her mother,"

I think I'm about to puke. I'd marched in here yesterday, pretending to be Isaac's mother in front of his maternal grandmother.

"I apologize, I'm not trying to in—"

"Take my daughter's place? Oh, it's alright. She's done this to herself," Mary shrugs softly as she begins slicing the chicken now.

"I'm so sorry," I don't know what else to say. I don't even know what's happened in this house exactly but I can't bring myself to ask because it feels like it's none of my business.

"Shirley has always been a wild spirit. She likes adventure, and fun, and luxury. When she met William in college, she was doing her Bachelor in Nutrition and he was studying in Medicine. She quickly fell in love. He was everything she hoped for, he came from an extremely rich family, he had a steady career in the future, he's also very good looking, and he spoilt her because he was smitten by her. They got engaged after graduation. Everything was fine for a couple of years. They were happy. But then she got pregnant. I think it all began when she got pregnant. Suddenly they had to get married and Shirley wasn't as happy as she was before. She began feeling... trapped. Her passion for seeing the world began eating her. That's when the fights began,"

"Oh," I dumbly reply, finding myself suddenly tongue-tied. I don't know who to blame in this situation. I don't even think I have a right to keep an opinion about this situation.

"I've pushed too much information onto you, haven't I?" The older woman chuckles nervously as she brings up a large wok and turns on the stove.

"No no, I'm sure you need to share your feelings with someone. You must be very sad as well," I reply hurriedly. Not giving my reply too much of a thought as spill out whatever I'm actually thinking.

"I miss my daughter," Mary admits, standing still for a second before she visibly shakes herself and begins pouring the oil into the wok, "But I know she's made some unforgivable mistakes. She will never be able to make up for what she's done to William and Isaac. I'll admit, I wasn't happy to see you yesterday. It felt like you're replacing my daughter. But I thought about it all night, I'm ... I'm happy you're here. Both William and Isaac are very taken by you."

My heart jumps in my chest.

"I'm sorry. I think you misunderstand," I shake my head as I bring my hands forward to wave them in a no, "William and I — "

"It's fine, dear. William has been divorced for almost two years now. He deserves to find someone else who can make him happier,"

Oh my God... give me strength.

I give up. Deciding to get the topic back to things that I actually should be concentrating on.

"Could you please tell me what Isaac likes to eat and stuff? Are there things he likes to do a lot? Like going to the movies? Is he... is he allergic to something? Or is scared of something? Like heights?"

"Don't worry dear, I've prepared that list over there for you. It will help you. It has information for both Isaac and William,"

I want to disappear as I feel my cheeks grow hot for the nth time since sitting on this high chair. My head turns towards the paper I hadn't noticed before now and I hesitantly reach towards it.

My fingers fumble with the folded piece of paper for a bit before I finally manage to unfold it successfully.
The contents of the paper spill out in abundance, but the first thing I notice is the clean handwriting Mary possesses.

"You have very pretty handwriting," I compliment the older woman shyly, remembering my own filthy scribbling.

"Thank you, dear. I like to do calligraphy in my spare time," Mary smiles back, visibly looking quite flattered.

My eyes drop to the rough-textured paper I have in my hand.

"Is it okay if I read this right now?" I ask out of politeness. I suppose it would be impolite to break the conversation with the elderly woman just to read this right here.

"Of course, dear! That is what I wrote it for after all, for you to read this," Mary's bright, twinkling eyes crinkle

Again my eyes find the paper. This time I begin reading.

Isaac — :
~ He's a Vietnamese (Mum & Dad) & Chinese (Dad)
~ He was born on 9th March, 2013. Friday, 8.01PM.
~ He knows roughly three languages (English, Mandarin and Vietnamese). Although he's still learning.
~ He goes to preschool.
~ His teacher says he's very serious in school, but at home, he's an idiot.
~ He has two best friends, Jai and Liam.
~ He loves Power Rangers and Pokemon
~ His favourite cartoon is Spongebob.
~ He loves rice and noodles.
~ He hates taking sandwiches to school. He likes heavy meals with meat.
~ He really likes Indian food.
~ He likes having rain-baths. Even when he is not allowed.
~ He's a bit spoilt and fussy. He gets really upset when he doesn't get what he wants.
~ He's allergic to cat fur and peanuts.
~ He likes numbers a lot.
~ He eats everything that has chicken or beef in it.
~ He doesn't like Fish, Pork, Octopus, Squid, etc.
~ He has a very big sweet tooth.
~ He's scared of the darkness. He thinks Slander man will get him.
~ He's not a morning person.
~ He really likes the colour blue.
~ He's very protective of his things. He doesn't really share.
~ He listens to a lot of Vietnamese music because of me. He actually likes it.
~ Above from having a big sweet tooth, he really really loves trifles.
~ He has a doctor's and dentist's checkup every six months.
~ He's strictly not allowed Soda of any sort.
~ He gets running stomach when he eats something hot.
~ He likes to listen to Nursery Rhymes before bed.
~ Even though he won't admit it, he likes to be told fairytales as well.
~ He thinks his father doesn't like him & tries to avoid William.
~ He's afraid of spiders, lizards and heights
~ When he gets angry he starts speaking gibberish. It's a mixture between English, Vietnamese and Chinese.

I blink. Taking all the information in the paper with a soft smile on my face.

"He likes Indian food?" I ask, chuckling as I lift my eyes to Mary's. I'm secretly happy to be partially brown right now. To know that I can make something that brings the little man happiness, I'm already feeling very happy.

"His best friend Jai shared his lunch with him once. He's wanted to eat biryani again ever since," Mary answers, shaking her head as she lets out a soft chuckle of her own.

"I'll make it for him then," I nod, quite pleased with the arrangement.

"I've been meaning to ask you, my dear. You do look a bit exotic. What ethnicity are you?" Mary asks softly, it's clear she's trying her best to sound as gentle as possible. I suppose I can't blame her, a lot of people are very touchy about other people asking about their ethnicity. I don't mind though. I am what I am.

"My mother is brown. She was born in Kashmir before my grandparents migrated to the UK when she was three. And my father is a pure Brit. Born and raised," I smile at the elder woman.

"Well, no wonder you have such beautiful eyes! And an accent as well," Mary exclaims, wide-eyed, in reply.

"Do you really think so? Thank you!" I feel myself blush under the woman's compliment.

"Of course! You have very large, dark, mysterious looking eyes. The sort that seems like they're holding the world's secrets in them,"

Her words can't help but make me wonder. Is that why William looks at me like he's peering into my soul? To see the world's secrets?

"Thank you, Mary. No one has complimented my eyes like that," I let out a small embarrassed laugh as I feel my cheeks blush. I know I'm completely red right now. It's not an attractive colour on me.

"It's only the truth," Mary smiles, before going back to the breakfast preparation for Isaac.

"Aren't you doing to read the next part?" She asks softly, catching me off guard as I find myself admiring her while she cooks. Whatever it is that she is cooking — it smells bloody delicious!

I don't think my blush can get any deeper. But it does. My cheeks feel like they are on fire.

"Er," I clear my throat, "Right."

My look back at the list and gulp.

William — :
~ He's half Vietnamese (Mum) & Chinese (Dad)
~ He was born on the 18th February 1989.
~ It was a Saturday. An unusual time too - 11:11PM.
~ He's the only child
~ He has an IQ of 157.
~ He knows four languages (English, Mandarin, Cantonese, and Vietnamese).
~ He was born in Beijing but moved to Hong Kong with his mother for four years. His father stayed back because of his business empire. They moved back to Beijing when he was 10.
~ He completes his high school in a private boarding school in Australia.
~ Then he came to Canada to study in Uni and he has been here ever since. PR and everything.
~ He's usually very quiet and withdrawn.
~ Very polite and respectful
~ However, you may find him to be very, very difficult.
~ Still, he's kind. He let me stay here despite what Shirley did.
~ He has a best friend, Kris Zhao. He's also a surgeon.
~ I think his sister, Cecelia, is interested in William.
Bad match.
~ His favourite shows are ... he watches nothing except occasional crime investigation shows
~ He swims every Saturday and goes to the gym three times a week.
~ He likes collecting watches. It's a habit passed down by his father he says.
~ He loves all sorts of meat but avoids most sweet things — Especially tea and white chocolate — and squid.
~ Every morning, he likes having sausages and eggs with a cup of coffee.
~ I've never seen or heard him listening to music.
~ He's a bit boring.
~ He'a happier during winter than summer
~ He really likes onions. Eats them raw with soy sauce.
~ When he was in high school, he was on the swimming team. He was also selected for the nationals I think.
~ He's very close to his mother and father, who often fly from Beijing just to visit him.
~ He'll have to move back to Beijing someday because he's the only heir to his dad's empire.
~ Shirley was his first girlfriend and his first wife. He hasn't dated after the divorce.
~ He doesn't like carrots or peas or pumpkin and pawpaw in food. He doesn't eat the meal when it has one or more of those. Or just separates the carrots and peas to one side.
~ William is left-handed.
~ William loves Isaac very, very much. Poor boy just does not know how to answer the child's questions. So he works a lot to avoid it.
~ He is insomniac. I've seen him walking around at night.
~ He's afraid of the sea.

"Why will I find him difficult?" I look up at Mary curiously.

I can see a small smile tugging at Mary's lips as she lifts her head.

"Although he is always quiet, and thoughtful, and kind. William was born to a very rich household, as an only son too. He has a fair share of issues with his personality that you may find difficult to deal with,"

For a second my mind randomly wanders to the little boy and I wonder if he's still sleeping. Then my attention returns to the woman in front of me. My curiosity has peeked, I'll admit. Despite trying not to be, I have to admit, Isaac's father makes me curious. Very much so.

"For instance?" I ask the woman, hoping she won't read too much into this. For a split second, I wonder why I'm so scared of her thinking too much of my curiosity. Why should I be scared of her thinking of something that's not true?

"William is very kind... but he is intolerant to sharing whatever he begins to like. Isaac gets that quality from his dad. He also has a tendency of being a leader — it's hard to explain — you'll see. But let's just say that even though he's quiet, he's secretly very fierce. He also has a quick and dangerous temper."

I blink, "I don't understand? He's been so — "

"Cautious and polite?" Mary supplies, smiling at me kindly. I nod, watching her carefully roll the egg omelet.

"He is cautious and polite. But that doesn't mean he isn't those other qualities as well. For example, once a group of girls posted drunk pictures of Shirley and her friend all over the campus. William spent half a day going around the campus and removing every picture himself. He burnt them all in front of the entire campus. Then got the girls reported to their faculty heads. He didn't stop until they were suspended for an entire semester."

I blink, "What?"

"MUMMMMYYY!?!! MUMMMYY?!! MUUMM—mummmy!!!"

My heart jumps in my chest at the sudden sound of a clearly distressed Isaac blasting around the house. Twirling around, I'm only able to get off the high stool before the crying, scared looking boy leaps onto me. All surprise about William already forgotten.

In this moment, I don't know what to say to the upset child. The next few minutes go by in silence and muffled sobs, and I can only pull the little boy up close in my embrace and hold him until his sniffles slowly come to a halt.

"I was just chatting with Gran, bubbah," I whisper to him lovingly as I place a kiss on his jet black hair, rubbing his back comfortingly.

"I got scared! I thought — " Isaac's voice cracked and I knew the exact moment he began crying again, "I thought I had a dream, mummy! You were a dream!"

"It's okay," I hurriedly pull him closer, "It's okay. Mummy's sorry. Mummy will always be there when you wake up, okay?" I try to assure him.

"P—promise?" Isaac sniffles, hiccuping just after asking the question.

I want to slap myself. Why did I have to say something like that!? Didn't I know that a promise was going to come next!?

"You don't break your promises," I remind myself sadly, "If you promise him this, you'll have to fulfill it."

"Mummmyy?"

"Yes?" I twirl him around. Panicking my eyes find a concerned looking Mary, and I look at her with wide pleading eyes.

"It's just a promise," she mouths, encouraging me to just make it.

"Have you brushed yet, young man?" I ask Isaac instead, changing the topic. The child buys it immediately. I feel as his tiny body freezes in my embrace and his forehead falls against my chest.

"No," he mumbles slowly.

"Then let's get you freshened up first, okay?"

"No," Isaac huffs suddenly, his tiny fingers fist my sweater and I let out a sigh. Is this a trait he's inherited from his father as well? Stubbornness?

I think back to Mary's encouragement.

It's just a promise.

It isn't just a promise. It's his trust in me.

"Mummy has something to discuss with you first Isaac. After you tell mummy what you think, then we can talk about the promise. Okay?"

"Talk about what?" Isaac's head shoots up, his big, bright dark eyes blink at me curiously and I can't help but smile. He's such a beautiful child.

Turning towards Mary, I tilt my head towards the stairs, letting her know that I'm going to take him up to freshen up. When she smiles at me with a nod, I turn around and begin walking towards the stairs, deciding to just jump into it.

"Mummy has another house where she lives," I begin explaining as softly as I can. We begin to climb the stairs.

"Mummy doesn't want to be with me?" Isaac's voice turns into a croaky whisper and I know he's about to cry again. Immediately I hold him away from me until we're face to face.

"I want to be with you," I reply firmly, looking the child in his beautifully shaped eyes.

Isaac tilts his head to his side.

"Mummy doesn't want to be with daddy?" He sniffles and his bright red nose becomes a little redder when he rubs his small hands against his nose next.

This leaves me speechless. What do I say to the child now?

Just lie!

"I want to be with your daddy very much," I smile instead, crossing my fingers behind Isaac's small form, "But my other home is close to my work, so it's easier to travel in the mornings."

I wonder how much of my explanation the little boy is able to understand. Still, I decide to talk to him as an equal right now. This way he will learn.

"Oh," Isaac frowns, seemingly thinking very hard. Then his eyes glance at something behind me and they instantly brighten. He takes me by surprise when he suddenly jumps in my arms.

"Paaa!!"

I want the earth to split open and swallow me alive! I want Hagrid to crash into this house through the roof, tell me I'm a witch and whisk me away on his magical motorbike!! I want Aladdin to suddenly show up on his magic carpet and say "I can show you the world!" Because I bleeding would love to see any part of the world right now than the one behind me!

"Mummy, you and daddy not talking??" Isaac whispers, blinking at me expectingly.

Oh God give me strength!

Turning around slowly, I almost want to put Isaac on the floor and run away. Away from the expression, his father must have on his face after hearing me say such an embarrassing thing.

My eyes find his chest first. The muscles under his bleach white long-sleeved shirt are clearly apparent now in the light of the day. My eyes travel over his body and I watch the bag and blue jacket hanging from his hand. I gulp. He's going to the hospital I realise. My eyes hesitantly lift until meet his dark, piercing ones.

"M— Morning," I stutter. I grit my teeth at that. I usually stutter when I'm nervous or excited. It's annoying, but it can't be helped.

Still regarding me with those unreadable eyes, the tall man tilts his head and I grit my teeth again. Fighting to keep my feet from running away.

"Mummy, you and daddy fight?"

I believe this is the first time I've heard Isaac make a mistake. I decide to teach him the correct past tense if I'm able to survive his father's piercing gaze right now.

"No, we have not," I smile at the boy. On impulse, I quickly peck him on his cheeks as well, "Let's go get you freshened up, aright?"

"Mummy kisses me. Why not daddy?"

Oh God, this would be a great time to turn me into a pot plant!

"ISAAC!" William's loud voice seers through the air and I flinch at the warning it holds.

"See," Isaac mumbles, ignoring his father, "Mummy and daddy fight! Paa's angry at me!"

I stop. And then take a deep breath. This is honestly not going to help.

"No, we haven't," I smile brightly at William as I tighten my hold on Isaac and begin moving towards him. Reaching the tall man, I lean forward a little until my fingers find his soft hand. As if it's the most natural thing to do, I curl my fingers through the spaces of his. Avoiding his eyes now like the plague, I bring both our hands up and show it to Isaac,
"See! We're fine!"

"Mummy lies! That's why mummy has another house! Mummy and daddy fight and mummy doesn't want me, right?"

"ISAAC! STOP SPEAKING RIGHT NOW!"
I flinch at the harshness in William's voice. Suddenly Mary's list makes sense!

In my arms, Isaac flinches too. Still, he humphs and crosses his arms in front of him, looking away from his father and I.

I think about the possibilities with the courses of action I can take now. I can avoid this all of this and leave Isaac with his suspicions. After all, how long can a 5-year-old remember to be suspicious?
I cringe. Who am I kidding? Five-year-olds now aren't how five-year-olds were like back in the days. Plus Isaac seems just as intelligent as his father. Of course, he will remember.

"Let's go shower, mummy!" Isaac declares haughtily, his tiny voice filled with rebellion.

"Isaac, look your daddy and I really are fine," I sigh, waiting until Isaac finally looks up at me with a large frown.

There is only one way left.

Realising I'm still holding William's hand, I tug on it until William stiffly bends to my height. Immediately I shoot forward and place a kiss on his surprisingly smooth cheeks. I feel as his jaw tightens under my lips, as his breath catches in his throat, and I immediately shoot back. Sensing that it's time to get as far away from the man as possible. I begin rushing away.

"See! I am so pretty, how could daddy fight with me, huh?" I chuckle at Isaac as I whisk both of us further and further away from his father. Or I hope so.

Isaac giggles at my self-praise, and I finally smile in relief. Already planning on meeting William privately and begging for forgiveness.

"Mummy?"

"Yes, sweetie?" I'm still smiling.

"For before... you promise?"

My smile drops a little. He's not letting it go.

I sigh, giving up. Deciding I'll work something out eventuality, I beam at the child.

"Okay, mummy promises. BUT when I'm out for work, then I will call you every morning when you wake up and we can video chat, okay?" I add in hurriedly, not being able to not try to compromise.

"No,"

"Isaaaccc," I groan as we enter his room and I push the door close. Dropping my head on his shoulder, I sigh.

"Can we please discuss this some other day? Please?"

Isaac seems to think about it for a while, then his eyes find mine again.

"Mummy?"

I tense. I'm already thinking of what to say to his next possible question, "Yes sweetie?"

Isaac frowns, his lips move silently as if he's recalling whatever it is that he wants to say. Then he stops.

"What's... bubbah?"

I blink for a second or two, before my head tips back and I let out a bark of laughter.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"What work does mummy do now?"

I smile at the sleepy little boy's groggy question. His attempt to keep himself awake while maintaining a conversation even though he's clearly sleepy makes me feel more sad than happy.

Such a young soul shouldn't be scared of being abandoned. Such a young soul shouldn't be scared of anything except maybe the boogeyman. Definitely not scared of being left behind.

A long sigh leaves me as I continue to pat his back, trying to make him fall asleep. His small frame is almost completely covering me as he's spread on top of me. Although I notice that he's not heavy at all.

"I make sure that books are as nice as they can be before they are sold in stores," I try to give him an easier version of the answer. Despite being so intelligent, Isaac still is only six. Plus he's also sleepy at the moment. Lord knows if my current answer even made sense to him.

We had a very eventful day today. Getting Isaac ready for the day was a completely new experience for me. Well obviously since I've never had a younger sibling, nor do I have kids of my own. It got to be even newer of an experience when he began running around the room stark naked, refusing to get dressed just so I would run around after him. At that time I was secretly thankful William wasn't in the house and had probably left for the hospital already, Lord knows he would have been yelling at Isaac if he were home.

After getting Isaac finally ready, we went downstairs where he had his breakfast. Mary and I prepared something for ourselves after seeing that Isaac had completely finished his meal.

While we ate, Isaac decided it was a great idea to watch Pokemon. It actually was, seeing the little peanut completely silent for an hour was very pleasing. Putting aside the fact that I had to remind him to move back and away from the TV screen a couple of times that is.

As soon as we were done, Pokemon was definitely not forgotten. Instead, Isaac made me watch the next couple of episodes with him.

When he'd had enough, he asked if he could be taken out. Mary and I thought it wasn't such I bad idea. She and I took Isaac to the city for lunch. I think he liked the chocolate and mint ice cream he got afterward much more than he liked lunch. Of course, he made us promise not to tell William when we got him a second serving after a lot of begging and pouting.

Isaac wasn't aware though, I'd been sneaking pictures of him all day. I told myself that when everything was over and I was by myself again, that they would stand as a confirmation that this actually did happen. That I really did meet this lovely boy.

We returned home around four in the evening. I could tell that Isaac was already tired after having a day out and not having a mid-day nap. Still, I insisted that he have a shower and his dinner before he jumps into bed.

A shower and dinner later, here we are currently. Me trying to make him sleep and very well on my way to succeeding.

"That sounds too hard," Isaac let out a little yawn, stopping for a while to recover himself before he continues, "Isn't mummy tired?"

"Mummy likes doing it," I reply to the little peanut lovingly, "So even if she gets tired. She likes it."

"Mummy's weird," Isaac yawns again, almost dozing off by the end. I caress his hair lovingly before continuing to pat his back, humming a tune I know my mum used to sing to me every night. I'm a pretty ridiculous singer compared to Saara, but I suppose I'm not that bad because Isaac isn't telling me to shut up yet.

I wonder what time it is right now. Ten?

"Isaac?"

My arm slides around the now softly snoring little boy lying on top of me, as I continue to pat him. My eyes, however, snaps to the door when it begins to open.

I watch as William walks into the room and stops in his steps, realising that Isaac is asleep. His eyes snap from his son to mine and I smile at him sheepishly as I try turning Isaac over to place him nicely on the bed.

"Mummy?" Isaac croaks just as his back touches the mattress. I cringe when he begins to sniffle, "You leaving, mummy?"

I'm an idiot. I have no tact. And I don't want to see him cry. So instead of making up an excuse that would allow me to successfully run away from his father, I wrap my arm around him and pull him closer until his back is snuggled against me.

"No, I wasn't. Your dad's home and I just wanted you to be more comfortable," I mumble softly, caressing his hair lovingly.

Isaac hiccups and shuffles closer, wrapping his smaller arms over mine, "Oh... okay."

"Can you take care of him for a minute?" I mouth at a silently observing William. I need to let Saara know that I won't be able to make it today. I'm kinda thankful that some foreseeing bug bit me in my head and I brought spares over today just in case. That reminds me to give William his washed and good as new clothes.

Still, I kind of feel weird staying over for the night here. But then I really don't want to have Isaac crying in the morning thinking his mother has left him again.

After a second of just looking between me and Isaac, William slowly nods and moves further into the room. I gulp when he gets into the bed himself and I slowly begin to unwrap my arms from around the little boy, his father's arm wraps around him instead and I smile when he caresses his child lovingly.

Ah, so he does love him regardless of that awful behaviour he always has towards Isaac.

"Thanks," I whisper before slipping out of the bed and grabbing my phone. Quickly I walk out of the bedroom and close the door behind me.

I hurriedly tap on 'call' beside my cousin's name. Saara picks up on the second ring.

"Staying with the son tonight?" she asks in a bland tone.

I know what's coming. She's going to give me a long speech about my life choices and where I'm going. I clear my throat nervously, "Yeah."

"Gemma, what are you thinking  exactly?" Saara sighs tiredly. Her tone, however, I notice has softened.

"Don't be mad," I groan.

"You're going to have to bend your life over a lot just go straighten that kid's. And when his real mother comes back, you'll be thrown out. You're not the mother he's hurting for, Gem. Remember that."

It hurts. It cuts right through my weak spot, and I snuffle back until I'm leaning against the wall.

"You think I don't know that?" I breathe emotionlessly, "You think I didn't take into account all of these things before jumping into this?"

"I'm sure you did. But taking into account and being prepared are two different things. Were you prepared for it? No — Are you prepared for it?"

"No," I admit, "No I'm not prepared for it. But this isn't about me. It's about the little child. I really care for him, Saara. And I'll keep him happy for as long as he lets me. When the end comes and I'm no longer needed, I'll move back into my own life knowing he'll be fine. I'll have done my part."

"You're being very stupid," Saara points out.

"I know," I admit. I mean It's true. Which self-preserving woman would do what I'm doing? I'm being utterly reckless. And maybe when all this ends, initially I'll regret being so reckless and investing so much of my emotions. But I don't think I'll ever regret making Isaac smile. At least I'll be assured that he won't be abandoned.

"Just be here for me. You know I need you, don't you?" I ask, shuffling on my feet as I begin to turn around nervously.

I stop when I come face to chest with William. At once, my head tilts up until I'm looking into his eyes.

His expression is unreadable but I stay rooted on my feet for some reason.

"Secret boyfriend?"

His voice sounds lower than it usually is. This for some reason sends warning bells all over my brain. Immediately I find myself tapping on the speaker.

I can't help but think about Mary's words again.

"...Even though he's quiet, he's secretly very fierce. He also has a quick and dangerous temper,"

Then Saara speaks.

"Hey, is that my nephew's father? Wow he sounds jealous," Saara's soft chuckle echoes around the hallway, and I instantly click on  loudspeaker again before turning back around, mortified at my decision to ever put her on speaker.

"Yeah, it was William. And no he isn't! He's just concerned I have a boyfriend who must be finding this arrangement awkward," I try to pour out as much bullshit as I can think of.

"No, I'm pretty sure he sounded jealous, to me," Saara scoffs, sounding excited suddenly.

"Hey, why don't you seduce the father so you can keep the son forever?" she whispers schemingly and I want to swear at her.

"Poofy, next time you audition for a role, make sure it's for a negative one. You'll get it!"

"I'll still think he sounded jealous," Saara retorts stubbornly.

I groan. She's being a delusional idiot.

"Saara Malik, I'm going to disconnect the line now! I'll see you at home!" I mutter back as quickly as I can before pressing on the disconnect.

Turning around I'm left facing an empty hallway. William is nowhere to be seen.