"I can't believe this!" Ten exclaimed, hands flinging around in the air as he jumped up from the bed. He had practically hauled Jungwoo out of the cafe the second he finished up his business, leaving a sputtering Jungwoo and a confused Lucas. They now sat in Jungwoo's room.

"How could you never tell me?!" Jungwoo stared at Ten, trying not to laugh while waiting for his brother's "mad facade" to break. He knew that Ten was more happy for Jungwoo than mad about not knowing his hidden escapades with Lucas.

The two stared at each other before bursting out laughing. Ten ran from his place, tackling Jungwoo on the bed and laughing. It took a few minutes for the two brothers to gain their composure back.

"How did it all start?" Ten asked, now lying beside Jungwoo on the bed.

"Honestly, it was all kind of a blur, one day we were talking and laughing, the next we were making out in the staff room." Jungwoo said dreamily, before jumping at Ten's exasperated gasp.

"Wait, wait, wait, You're telling me that time in the bathroom wasn't the first time?" Ten asked.

Jungwoo smiled and shook his head.

Ten whistled. "Wow, who would've thought that someone as innocent and sweet as you would land someone before me?" Jungwoo scoffed.

"Ten, I've lived with you for most of my life now, and I have seen the many people that have come to you for more than just sex, and leave after you kindly crush their heart."

Ten stared at Jungwoo, before looking away and scoffing. "Like who?"

Jungwoo jokingly rubbed his chin in inquisition. "Well, let's see, where should I even start?" he joked, laughing at the push he receives from Ten.

"Well I know one that's going on right now?" He said. Ten looked at him, a silent cue to keep talking.

"Johnny."

"Johnny? From the cafe?" Jungwoo nodded his head, but frowned when Ten shook his.

"What? It's true! He talks about you all the time!"

"He doesn't even know me!"

"Exactly! So it gets a little tiring hearing him think out loud about what you would like." Ten rolled his eyes.

"But seriously Ten, Johnny is actually a really nice guy, you should give him a chance."

Ten noticed that Jungwoo is really keen on matching Ten with someone, and while he appreciates the care, he really doesn't know how to tell him that all his efforts are futile.

"I'm not going to give anyone false hopes." Ten responded.

From what he had seen, Johnny seemed like a nice guy, if you ignore the time when he blatantly talked about Jungwoo's past in his face, something which Jungwoo has surely forgotten, and something Ten can't seem to forget.

"Well you're giving him false hopes already."

"How?"

"Ordering from him."

"I don't even talk to him?"

"Doesn't matter! That guy will take anything from you at this point."

"Well tell him I'm not interested or something."

"You do that! Why me?!" Jungwoo said.

Ten laughed at Jungwoo's pouting face. He managed to deflect the pillow that was thrown at him.

After another intense pillow fight, Jungwoo spoke, "So, how's it going with Taeyong?"

Ten couldn't help but smile at just hearing the name. Jungwoo seemed to notice.

"Spill!" he yelled.

Ten bit his lip trying to conceal the bubbling excitement. "It's going great, I really think there's progress going on."

Ten never really knew Taeyong before, he had only known of him. Ten thinks these are two different things. You could know of someone, maybe you've just heard of them, or asked someone yourself about their past or present. But you could never know the true them, until you've heard from them.

For Taeyong, Ten got nothing but warning signs. He was told to stay away from him, quit from his case, and avoid him, because he was troubled. But after spending time with Taeyong, even if it isn't the ideal amount of time to truly know someone, Ten now has more of an idea of who Taeyong is.

"Well that's good." Jungwoo said, and Ten nodded in agreement.

"You know," Jungwoo began, "I've never seen you like this before." he pointed out.

Ten scoffed, "What? Actually doing something in my career for once?"

Jungwoo shook his head and softly said, "No. I mean I've never seen you this... bright. You're practically glowing. And that's saying a lot, because you're usually bubbly anyway."

Ten stared for a moment, before speaking with a smile. "I have a reason to be this way."

****

The next two months passed by rather quickly, probably the quickest two months in Ten's whole life. Maybe it's because he has something now, he has a job, a goal he must reach.

The sessions with Taeyong have been going well, so well that Ten walks out of the room with a wide ass grin actually. They usually consisted of them listening to music, talking about nothing and everything about the stupidest stuff. Most of the time it was Ten doing the talking, but when Taeyong spoke, Ten couldn't help but feel something in his chest, and hear something in his ears.

He doesn't even think of Taeyong as his patient, rather his friend. He doesn't know if Taeyong would exactly approve of the term however, so Ten keeps that as his little secret. While he isn't able to go outside yet, he had been talking with Doyoung about it.

Doyoung said he was making great progress, having received significantly less complaints about Taeyong.

Ten couldn't help but feel a bubbling sense of warmth whenever Taeyong would look at someone other than Ten in the eyes, no matter impassive or intense his stare is.

What Ten can't wait to see, is Taeyong's reaction when he tells him that he can go outside, out of his clammy little room. He can't wait to see his skin be kissed by the sun, like two old friends torn away from each other and reunited again.

Sure, he can't leave the hospital, but even the thought of Taeyong walking on ground other than the cold concrete of his room and the halls to the shower was never even considered before by the patient himself.

He thinks about these things as he heads to the cafe on a Saturday.

He has no reason for going, he just wanted to get out of the apartment.

He groaned as he saw the ridiculously long line, nearly going out the door.

He decided that maybe Jungwoo would sneak him a drink or something, if he wasn't getting his face eaten off by Lucas.

The two had officially become a couple now, and Ten had never seen his brother so lively and happy. Lucas seemed like he really loved and cherished Jungwoo, that being clarified for Ten after a certain encounter with the giant puppy.

"Why did you call me here Lucas? I told you Jungwoo wasn't with me." Ten said as he walked into the other's apartment.

It was about the size of his and Ten's but instead of another bedroom, there's a gaming room.

"That's exactly why I called you here. I need your help." Lucas said, hurrying to close the door.

His hair looked dishevelled, like he couldn't figure out how he wanted to style it, and his dress shirt was wrinkled and unbuttoned, revealing a white tank top.

Ten opened his mouth to question further before he saw the state of the place. There were clothes strewn across everything, dead flowers and burnt out candles sat everywhere, in the most random places. It reeked of cologne and a mix of different candle fragrances.

"It looks and... smells like a romcom took a giant shit in here." Ten said, pulling the neck of his shirt up to cover his nose from the interesting but nasty smell.

"Is it that bad?" Lucas said, looking terrified.

Ten scoffed. "Lucas, I can't even see the fucking floor!"

Lucas shakily sighed. "I really, really need your help."

"What you need is a cleaning crew and a new brand of cologne." Ten said.

"I was trying to set up a romantic place for when Jungwoo comes over tonight. I was planning to confess."

"Well, I'm not sure if Jungwoo finds a tragic murder scene from a Shakespeare poem romantic but it's an interesting approach." Ten said sarcastically.

"Would you quit goofing around? I'm really trying here!" Lucas said with a pout as he plopped down on the sofa, wrinkled roses in his hand.

Ten slowly but cautiously pulled his shirt away from his nose, automatically regretting the action. He decided he'd eventually get used to the ratchet smell and sat next to Lucas with a crinkle nose.

"I'm really trying to impress him tonight, but I have no fucking clue how I should pretty up the place. I don't even know what his favorite flowers are, and I panicked and pushed a whole shelf of candles into my shopping cart earlier."

Lucas said with a hand running through his hair. He huffed and leaned his head completely back, closing his eyes.

Ten took a moment to pity him before speaking.

"Lucas, you really don't need to do all this, Jungwoo is already head over heels for you. All you need to do is walk up to him, say you like him, give him a moment in the bathroom to squeal his lungs out, and then he's officially your boyfriend."

"You're sure he likes me that way?" Lucas said with giant, hopeful puppy eyes. "Lucas, you guys make out every shift, and I have to be the one listening to his dreamy sighs before I finally satisfy him and let him ramble about how good you kiss, or how strong you are."

Lucas looks out into space with a smile on his face, clearly happy about what he'd just heard. It took a couple snaps and a shout in his ear to finally break out of his reverie.

"I wish I had known that before I spent my weekly pay on all this stuff." He said, smiling down at the dead rose in his hand.

"I'll help you clean this all up if you'd like?" Ten said with a chuckle.

"Yeah that'd be great thanks." Lucas smiled, standing up to start. "Oh and one more thing." Ten said, prompting Lucas to turn to him.

"You really need a new cologne." Ten said, shaking his head.

"But it's Gucci!"

"Gucci coochie! It smells like shit!" Ten responded.

Now the two are glued to each other by the hip.

Ten can't tell if he enjoys hearing the constant rants about how perfect Lucas is. While he hates his ears being talked off, he enjoys hearing about how happy his brother is.

Ten walks around the line, apologizing when he bumps into a boy holding a watermelon smoothie.

He comes to the other side of the counter, bending over it trying to find Jungwoo.

After muttering a few curses under his breath, looking at the dreadfully long line.

I wish people hated coffee, he thought with a frown.

"Ten!" His face morphed into confusion as he looked around, trying to find who called his name.

He sighed when he saw it was Johnny. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt him, or anybody, but he knew he'd have to do it.

"Hey Johnny." Ten said with a smile.

"Do you need help with something?" Johnny said. Come on Johnny, you got this, he thought to himself.

"Yeah, actually I was looking for Jungwoo, is he here?" Ten asked.

"Yeah, Lucas called for him a second ago in the bathroom, said the toilet got clogged." He replied.

Ten rolled his eyes, knowing that the toilet wasn't clogged. The only thing that needed fixing was their hormonal needs. "Great, thanks Johnny." Ten said, starting to walk away.

"H-hey! Maybe we could go-" Johnny stopped talking when he saw that Ten had disappeared. He had started arranging the muffins to seem like he was actually working, and hadn't seen him go.

"Goddammit." Johnny muttered to himself.

He went back to arranging the muffins.

****

Come on Mark, you got this.

The boy said as he stood up from his seat, sipping on his watermelon smoothie.

His eyes were locked onto Johnny's tall form like a laser, who was putting whipped cream on a frappe.

He attempted to beeline towards him before someone bumped into him, nearly spilling his smoothie. He was about to yell at them but stopped as they bowed and apologized with a smile, walking off.

Mark was too nice of a person to yell like that. His mom always told him not to yell if they sincerely apologize.

He huffed and continued walking towards his crush before stopping when he saw the man who had bumped into him talking to Johnny. His Johnny.

What's his relationship with the guy? Mark asked himself. All his spirits were crushed under the foot of this stranger.

He shook his head, regaining his confidence. They could be just friends.

Come on Mark.

He saw that the stranger was walking away, and started advancing toward his crush again.

"Hey." He said, but he only mouthed it.

Johnny continues arranging the muffins, still looking down.

"What up." Mark tried again, but it still only came out as a whisper.

He stood there like that for around a minute before, Johnny noticed him himself.

"Hey, can I help you with something?" Mark jumped so hard, his smoothie nearly splashed out of the cup. He had been too focused on trying to speak louder.

"Y-yeah."

"What do you need?" Johnny said with a kind smile.

Okay Mark, Come on. All you gotta do is ask for his number.

He took a deep breath, and spoke on his exhale.

"W-watermelon smoothie."

Are you fucking kidding me?

Johnny laughed, pointing at the cup in Mark's hands. "You have one right there?"

Mark sighed. "Nevermind, thanks." He said dejectedly, he turned around, about to walk away before he heard Johnny calling after him.

"Wait! I can get you a muffin?" Johnny said, holding out a chocolate chip one.

Mark stood there, processing that his crush just offered him a muffin. That's basically asking for my love!

Mark grabbed the muffin with his hand shaking from excitement. He began reaching into his pockets for some cash, before looking up when Johnny stopped him.

"Just take it, on the house, but don't tell anyone, yeah?" Johnny said with a smile and a wink.

Mark tried not to die on the spot, just barely succeeding.

"Th-Thank you." He said with a wide grin before running away with a skip in his steps.

Johnny watched the boy skipping away. Cute, he thought.

****

Ten sighed walking away from the counter. He needed to go stop Lucas' and Jungwoo's little makeout session.

He didn't make it to the bathroom however, as he heard a woman call for him.

"Excuse me?"

Ten turned to the woman, his eyes widening as he saw who it was. It was the person he had bumped into on the street, the one he couldn't stop thinking about who she was, or who she looked like.

"Is your name Ten?" She asked.

Ten was taken aback on how she knew his name. "Yes, that's me." He responded.

The woman laughed, seeing Ten's confused expression. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to scare you, I overheard your name from where I was sitting. I have been looking for you."

"You have?" Ten asked. He didn't know if he should run or not.

"Yes, my name is Sunmi, Lee Sunmi." She said with a small smile.

Ten inhaled shakily, stepping back a little bit. It all clicked into place as he looked at her again, but in a new light, a new perspective.

He remembers seeing her face on one of Taeyong's files. He remembers hearing Doyoung speaking the name, and feeling like he'll never see this person, or anyone from Taeyong's past.

But here he finds himself standing, in front of the only person left who really cared for Taeyong in his past, the one who held him when he was broken, piecing him back together just enough to live.

"L-Lee Sunmi? You're Lee Taeyong's sister?" Ten asked.

Sunmi's eyes seemed to spark at the sound of Taeyong's name rolling off Ten's tongue. Something Ten couldn't quite place, because it sat in between hope and remorse.

"Yes, yes I am." Sunmi said after a moment.

After another, she spoke again. "I've looked everywhere for you, and I've had so much time to think about what I could say to you, but now, I can't seem to remember anything I could've come up with." Sunmi said with a nervous chuckle.

Ten responded with a chuckle as well, but a silent one through his nose, covered by a soft smile. He can sense the other's nervousness, which oddly comforted him greatly.

"Why don't we talk somewhere then? I'd love to speak with you." Sunmi let out a sigh of relief, nodding with the same smile as Ten's.

****

Ten studied Sunmi's features as they sat in a comfortable silence at a table outside the cafe.

It's amazing how once you figure something out, whether it be an answer to a riddle, or a remembrance of something, you feel so silly for not seeing it before, as it all becomes so obvious once revealed.

He marvels at the thought as he sees the uncanny resemblance between Sunmi and Taeyong. Like Taeyong, Sunmi has brown hair with chocolate brown eyes. Her lips are thin but at the same time hold just the right amount of volume in them. While Taeyong is handsome, Sunmi is beautiful.

"So, What did you want to talk to me about? I'm assuming it's about Taeyong?" Ten asked.

Sunmi cleared her throat and nodded. "I'm sure you know who Doyoung is?"

"Of course."

"Yes, well, Doyoung has been keeping me up with Taeyong from the first time he set foot in Neo Hospital. After hearing about how many people got hurt by him, I started to lose hope."

Sunmi looked down while clearing her throat, trying to stop an onslaught of tears.

"I-I... hate myself, for leaving him like that, sending him to that hospital, that godforsaken room, no matter how needed it was. It's all my fault he's there, and it's my fault for all the people he's hurt."

Ten shook his head, reaching over the table to grab onto Sunmi's hand. Sunmi looked up with glassy eyes.

"Sunmi, don't ever think what you did is wrong, and especially don't put yourself down for it." Sunmi nodded, continuing what she was saying earlier.

"I heard from Doyoung though, about a month ago, that you were his therapist, and you've been making progress with him." Ten nodded. "It... It gave me hope... hope that Taeyong will get better, that I'll be able to see him again."

Ten felt a pang in his chest. How long has she been wishing to see her brother? How long has she been hoping to say all these words to him?

"I guess, I came to thank you, and to say that I really hope you can help him." Sunmi finished.

"Sunmi," Ten started. "When Taeyong sees you again, what will you say to him?"

Sunmi was taken aback by the question, clearly not expecting to be asked that.

She took a few breaths, before responding. "I... I'd tell him I'm sorry, that I left him alone, that I couldn't be there for him all time. And... I'd tell him I love him. When I'd comfort Taeyong, he'd always apologize, just for living, and it broke my heart. No matter how many times I told him that I wouldn't trade him for the world, or I couldn't wish for a better sibling, his brain had already taught him the opposite." Sunmi didn't attempt to wipe the tears off her face, only looking at the table in front of Ten, too lost in her thoughts.

"Sometimes, our brains tell us something that can't be changed." Ten said, blinking back tears himself.

Taeyong.

Sunmi nodded, still looking down. "But they can be overruled. It's still there, but it's being ignored, pushed aside. You just have to shine a light on something else."

"How?" Sunmi asked.

"By being there." Ten said with a smile.

"By being there, they're not alone. Loneliness is the thing that inevitably kills us. It leads to the worst thoughts, the thoughts that no one cares about them, the thoughts that no one wants them there. Eventually, they'll ignore the bad thought for so long, it'll disappear."

Sunmi looked down. "I should've been there more." Ten stared at Sunmi before grabbing her hand again and speaking.

"It's not your fault, Sunmi, if anything, you saved him. It's the ill-intended people who're at fault. You brought him away from them, you've already shown light on something else, and that's what he needed."

Sunmi looked at Ten, laughing through her tears with a hopeful glint in her eyes.

"Thank you, Ten. Thank you."

Ten smiled and nodded. "He'll see you again, I promise."

****

Ten was heading back to his apartment when he got a call from Doyoung.

He looked at it in confusion before answering the call.

"Hello?"

"Hey Ten, it's Doyoung."

"Yep, I read the caller ID." Ten mocked. He laughed when he heard Doyoung huff on the other line.

"Anyways, I need you to come to the hospital, we need to talk. About Taeyong."

At the mention of Taeyong, Ten immediately threw every intention to tease Doyoung out the window.

It's been like that, at the mere mention of Taeyong, Ten seems to drop everything he's doing. Maybe it's because Taeyong is his first patient, or because he's an outcast.

Or maybe, it's something Ten doesn't want to see, or feel.

He's a good friend, Ten thought, shaking his head.

"Hello? Ten? You there?" Doyoung called out.

Ten jumped, forgetting he wasn't alone with his thoughts.

"Y-yeah... yeah I'm on my way." Ten said, hanging up the phone. He didn't know what would happen, he never knows what will happen when it comes to Taeyong.

****

Doyoung was waiting for Ten in front of the check-in counter when he arrived. He gave a curt nod before leading them to his office.

Ten couldn't stop from looking down the hallway that holds a little room.

A dark and cold one, with floors made of metal instead of a fluffy carpet or nice wood floors. A bed with a thin mattress that is as comfy as lying on the ground instead of a luxury king-sized one.

And yet, Ten's eyes held longing, because that hallway that holds a cold little room holds a warm little place in Ten's heart.

Fuck weekends, he thought, as he finally managed to tear his eyes away, and caught up with Doyoung.

Doyoung gestured to a chair across from his desk once they walked in.

After a moment of settling in, Doyoung spoke. "I was looking at Taeyong's progress, which I must say is tremendous thanks to you. But I know your goal as of right now is to get him to be able to go outside, correct?"

Ten nodded. "I know he can do it."

Doyoung didn't nod, nor say anything at all, and Ten grew anxious.

"You think he can't?"

The doctor sighed.

"Ten... I need Taeyong to be able to open up about his past, in order to allow him any access to the outside."

Ten frowned, trying hard to stop the wave of emotions from breaking the surface.

"Wha- I... I thought he just had to do some simple tests?"

Doyoung nodded. "The tests that are appropriate to determine whether the patient is mentally stable, yes. Taeyong has severe trouble preventing his episodes when his past is brought up, and that lack of control is just too dangerous."

"What do you want me to do? I-I can't do that to him!" Ten felt helpless.

We were so close.

"I'm afraid you have to, or else I won't be able to clear him." Ten looked down, trying to blink away his tears.

Doyoung gave him the room for a moment, letting him drown in his tears and his thoughts.

"The part that triggers him most is his father, so I need you to start there, that'll break the ice, and everything else will come out." Doyoung said, his eyes showing sympathy.

Ten never looked Doyoung in the eyes. "Ten... I don't wanna do this to him either, but in order for him to go outside, it's do this or keep him in that room."

Ten sniffed aggressively and wiped a lone tear that escaped his eye. His eyes shot up to Doyoung so intensely that the doctor was taken aback.

"Okay... okay I'll... I'll think about it." He said, rushing out of the room as soon as the last word came out of his mouth.

Doyoung sat in silence, sympathy, and stillness, remembering Ten's words.

****

Ten was rushing out of the hospital, feeling suffocated by its walls.

He rushed by Kun, wondering what he was doing there in the first place, he ran by the nurses wondering what was going on, and halted at the hallway.

He looked down the corridor, wanting nothing but to run into the confines of the room. His feet made their moves further down before he stopped himself.

I can't, I haven't decided yet.

And with that thought, he rushed through the hospital with his head down, deftly opening the door and running.

Once he felt like he could breathe again, no longer near the stifling hospital, he stopped in an alleyway.

He leaned against the wall, tipping his head back against the rough concrete. He waited for his breath to normalize, before sliding down the wall. It was then that he let everything go, his sobs wracking his body.

He held his head in his hands, everything he'd been talking to Taeyong about flooding back to his mind.

It had been a month, and listening to music with Taeyong had become a normal thing, a comfortable thing, and one of Ten's favorite things.

They had just finished a song, the two sitting in a comfortable silence as usual. Ten didn't know when any silence with Taeyong became "comfortable", but he doesn't mind it one bit.

"Taeyong, I found this song the other day." Ten said as he hit play.

Taeyong listened to the song and nodded. "I know this song."

"You do?" "Yeah, it's River Flows in You by Yiruma." he responded.

"Oh well, I wanted to ask you if you knew how to play it."

Taeyong stared for a second, something he always seemed to do with Ten, before nodding.

Ten gasped happily. "You do?!"

A nod again.

"Then play it for me soon, yeah?"

Taeyong opened his mouth to protest, before Ten gave him a look that said not to doubt himself. and nodded.

Whenever Ten would bring up Taeyong going outside, the patient was always quick to say it'll never happen. It took a while to get Taeyong to think that there's even the littlest chance that he'll ever be able to go outside, but eventually, after countless hours of Ten encouraging Taeyong over and over again, he has a little bit of hope for himself.

"Good, I'm excited." Ten said, with a smile that lit up the dark room for a few moments.

Taeyong looked into Ten's eyes. "I am too."

Ten was taken aback at first by the statement, and he knew Taeyong could see it in his eyes.

His face soon went from surprise to a somehow brighter smile though as he threw himself onto Taeyong for a hug.

He could hear a shaky breath of surprise from Taeyong, before feeling a hand gently lying itself on his back. His grip on the other only tightened.

Ten pulled his knees up to his chest, resting his arms on them, the sobs still tearing through him.

He needs this, and he wants it.

****

Ten trudged himself back home, only deciding to after receiving several calls from a very worried Jungwoo.

When he opened the door, he saw Jungwoo on the couch staring off into space worriedly before nearly snapping his neck to Ten after hearing the door open.

Ten stood still as Jungwoo got up and ran to him. His brother pulled him into a tight hug and lifted him up due to their height difference.

"Oh my god Ten I was so worried! You weren't answering my calls! Where have you been?!"

Ten slowly lifted his hands to rest on Jungwoo's back, still in a daze.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry Ten, I'm just glad nothing happened to you or something."

"I'm sorry." Ten said again.

Jungwoo grew confused. He hadn't realized that Ten wasn't apologizing to him until he spoke again.

"I'm so sorry. Taeyong, I'm so sorry." Ten said, as he gripped Jungwoo's shirt and started to break down again. Jungwoo lifted his head to look at Ten.

"Ten, what's wrong? You wanna talk about it?"

Ten nodded.

They ended up just like they did when Ten had his nightmare, sitting across from each other on the couch with mugs of tea in their hands.

Jungwoo gave Ten the time he needed to find his words, something he was always so grateful for when Ten let him do the same back then. He nodded encouragingly and sincerely when Ten looked into his eyes. Ten began to speak.

"Doyoung wants me to talk to Taeyong about his past. H-he said that's the only way Taeyong can get cleared to go outside, and it kills me, knowing we were so close, so close."

"Can't you just bring it up? Get Taeyong to learn how to cope with his past? Surely, not all your progress has gone to waste."

Ten shook his head.

"Taeyong gets episodes when his past is brought up, that's why he needs to learn how to prevent them before getting cleared. But I can't do that to him, Woo. His past is so dark, I never mention it to him. And to drop all that on him now? It would just ruin everything."

Jungwoo nodded in understanding. "But Ten, his past is also something that needs to be faced, something he needs to fight, to overcome. I think you should do it. When I told you about my past, it was hard, but I felt like a part of me, the broken part of me, was put back together again."

Ten didn't respond, but Jungwoo could see he was thinking hard over his words.

Jungwoo grabbed his hand. "I know you Ten, and I know that no matter how hard it will be for Taeyong, your guidance and help will get him through it."

Softly letting go of hand, Jungwoo got up and went to his room, leaving Ten in his thoughts.

****

Ten stand in the same dark void.

Though he'd been there before, he still couldn't stop the shivers that ran down his spine.

He looked around, seeing nothing but a door in the distance.

As he approached the door, he realized that it was the door, the door to Taeyong's room.

He entered the code, hearing the familiar beep of the door being unlocked.

As the door opened a bit, he heard the sound of a piano being played. He pushed the door open and saw Taeyong playing the piano in the middle of the room.

Ten smiled, listening to the beautiful song Taeyong was playing. He approached him slowly, noticing that the other was scooted fully to one side of the piano bench, leaving the other half empty for him.

As Ten sat down, Taeyong glanced at him with a smile, something he only got the pleasure of seeing a few times.

After a moment of Ten listening to Taeyong playing, watching his fingers elegantly glide across the keys, Taeyong spoke.

"Do you like it?"

Ten smiled and nodded. "It sounds beautiful."

Taeyong looked proud.

Ten looked around the room, seeing the window above Taeyong's bed. It looked much different, it was bigger and clearer, letting him see all the way through. The smile on his face quickly dissipated when he saw the same sick little boy.

It was Taeyong again, his face still blurred. Ten felt a pit in his stomach when he realized what would be happening soon.

"Taeyong."

Taeyong hummed.

"We need to help him." Ten said urgently. Taeyong continued playing.

Ten looked from Taeyong back to the window to see Taeyong's mother come into the room.

He inhaled shakily, panic filling him. It's the same, he thought as he saw Lee Dae grab Taeyong's chin harshly.

"Taeyong, we need to help them!"

Ten didn't know why he was referring to Taeyong and his little self as two different people, but that mattered little to him at that moment.

He looked back frantically to the window, seeing Dae mouthing at Taeyong's neck again.

"Taeyong!"

"Leave them, Ten" Ten looked back to Taeyong stunned. Taeyong was still looking at the keys.

Ten gasped when he saw hickies appearing on Taeyong's neck as Dae placed one on the boy. Ten grabbed his arm, trying to stop the now dark music Taeyong was playing.

"Taeyong! Please!" Ten was now full on screaming, begging for Taeyong to help him.

"Ten, just leave them, focus on me."

Taeyong now looked at Ten in the eye, his shirt unbuttoned, multiple hickies on his neck.

Despite the resistance from Ten's hand on his arm, he continued playing. Ten cupped Taeyong's face to keep his eyes on him.

"Taeyong! Stop!" He yelled in pure desperation.

"Focus on me." Taeyong repeated, tears streaming down his face.

"Focus on me."

Ten woke up gasping.

He wanted to cry, wanted to scream, but he didn't want to wake Jungwoo, and he felt that he had no energy left in him to cry.

He looked out his window and saw that it was now light outside. He sighed, not knowing what he will do today.

I guess I should be grateful, I have time to think, he thought.

He lay in bed, lost in his thoughts, before remembering that Taeyong was running out of gum the last time he'd seen him.

He looked at the exact time and saw that it was still actually 5:00 AM.

No places are open this early... Wait

"Goddammit."

****

Ten stood in front of the same convenience store he had gone to the first time he got Taeyong his stress cherry, gum, and sunflower seeds.

He was hesitant to go in, knowing what awaited him last time.

Maybe it won't be as bad since it's daytime, Ten thought.

He slowly opened the door, his ear automatically being filled with chaotic screams and loud singing.

Or maybe not. Ten made his way to the counter, hoping to see Seonghwa at the counter.

But alas, everything in life seems to be against him, as he saw someone else there. He had recognized him from last time, him being the one who yelled at literally everyone and everything.

Ten walked up to the man, who was yelling at someone at the back of the store. He didn't dare to check who the poor recipient was.

"Exc-"

"Yah! Mingi! What did I tell you about opening the ramen?! For the last time, it can't fix the tiles!"

Ten flinched as he was interrupted. The man in front of him didn't even notice him.

He walked away from the counter, deciding to come back for the gum and sunflower seeds. He went through the aisles, not really knowing what he's looking for.

It's like when you go to a store, yet you're too broke to buy anything in it, so you just look.

Looking, Ten realized, That's all I've been doing lately, looking.

It's true. Ten had been looking at Taeyong's files, looking at the blurred face of young Taeyong in his dreams, yet he's never "bought" something when it comes to Taeyong. He had yet to even talk about his past, too afraid how it would affect the patient.

Ten had been too lost in his thoughts to notice someone ahead of him stalking shelves, causing the two to collide with one another.

"Oh my- I'm so sorry!" Ten said, looking at the dropped items, he bent down, quickly picking them up."

"No, no it's ok- Ten?" The person said just as Ten stood up and held out the items.

Ten looked up upon hearing his name. "Oh! Hi Seonghwa!" He brushed the knee parts of his pants once Seonghwa took the items.

"Thanxx." He said.

Ten smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. Seonghwa seemed to notice as he spoke out.

"You ok? You look a little... down." he asked. Ten shook his head.

"No, I'm fine, I was just thinking about something."

"Taeyong?" Seonghwa said. Ten looked up to Seonghwa.

"H-how'd you know?"

Seonghwa shrugged. "San's told me a lot about you and Taeyong, about how you two are always the center of the gossip and you're also really close."

Ten choked on his spit. "C-close? W-we're not close" he stuttered.

Seonghwa raised a brow. "San always tells me about how you sleep together."

Ten's eyes went comically wide.

"W-we don't sleep together!"

"Literally, not sexually."

Ten felt stupid.

"Why, what did you think I meant?"

Ten wanted to go home.

Seonghwa laughed, seeing how the other went silent.

The mood seemed to lighten for a little bit, but Ten found himself with the same thought about Taeyong as before.

"Ten..." Seonghwa started, trying to change the mood.

Ten hummed but didn't look up. After a moment, Seonghwa stuck his hands in Ten's jean pockets, fishing for his phone.

Ten flinched, confused as to why Seonghwa was in his face with his hands down his ass pockets.

"Wh-What the fu-?!" Ten said. To say he was uncomfortable would be an understatement.

"Ah! Here it is!" Seonghwa said, now holding Ten's phone.

"Hey! Give me my phone back! What are you doing?!" Ten yelled, trying to snatch the phone out of Seonghwa's hands. Curse my fucking height.

"I'm adding San's number to your phone and we're calling him right now." Seonghwa responded, keeping his arm straight in the air. The two looked comical with Ten launching onto his tippy toes., trying to reach his phone. Ten stopped upon hearing the words, before trying even harder to get the phone.

"No! Why would you call him?!" Seonghwa lightly pushed Ten away. "Because you're clearly torn about something, it's making you sad, and that's no no."

Ten stared at Seonghwa.

"Besides, I have no idea how to consult people, and you clearly need it."

Ten huffed, crossing his arms as Seonghwa put San's contact on his phone. Seonghwa hit the call button, switching the phone to speaker and listened to the ring.

After two rings, Ten spoke.

"Oh well, guess we won't be calling him after all."

Seonghwa shook his head. "Sannie always answers calls with unknown numbers on the fourth ring." He responded. He sounded like a kid reciting something super important, with his determined eyes and his slightly pouting lips.

Ten scoffed before looking away, but glancing toward the phone on the third ring, seeing if the other is actually right.

Sure enough, once the fourth ring came, the call connected. Seonghwa smiled proudly.

"Hello?"

"Sannie!"

"What? Hwaseong?"

"Yeah it's me!"

"Oh, why are you calling me on a different cell? Did you lose your phone again? Did something happen at work?"

"No, no, no, I'm calling from Ten's phone!"

"Ten's there?"

"Yeah! He came in all sad about Taeyong so I'm calling you. I need you to help him."

Seonghwa glanced at Ten, who was listening to their conversation, looking around the shelves (He pretended to be mesmerized by a toilet brush), before swiftly turning around. "He looks like a sad kitten, Sannie, it hurts my heart." he whispered, though not very discreetly. Ten's brows furrowed as he snapped his head towards Seonghwa's back.

"Yah! I heard that!" Seonghwa flinched and turned around with a sheepish smile.

"I'm on my way." the two heard San say.

"Okay, Sannie! Bye! Love you!" San chuckled over the line.

"Bye baby, I love you too."

Ten internally cringed, but at the same time smiled at the couple.

****

San arrived about 10 minutes later, and Ten had already gotten what he came for with the help of Seonghwa, who shooed the "always yelling at people guy", who's name Ten had learnt was Hongjoong. Now, Ten was waiting outside on the same table he had talked to San on when he first met him.

Ten had been staring at his feet, thinking about Taeyong when he heard the soft click of San's shoes against the pavement.

Even though it was morning, it was still too early to have a lot of light, painting the atmosphere a soft blue. Ten would've found it relaxing if his head wasn't in such a turmoil.

"Hey, Ten." San said softly. Ten smiled weakly in response, looking back down at his feet as San took his seat.

"So, why did Seonghwa call me telling me that you were looking down?" he asked inquisitively.

Ten chuckled softly and shook his head, now staring at the crack in the pavement that became a home for a small colony of ants. He felt some sort of comfort watching the scene, like it was all too familiar to him, something so small, yet so significant, making its home in something someone else would call broken and ugly.

"I tried to stop him from doing that, I'm sorry for wasting your-"

"Wait, why are you apologizing? I'm glad Seonghwa called me, it's so obvious something is up with you." San interrupted him.

Ten opened his mouth to speak but closed it after realizing he didn't have anything to say.

"What's wrong Ten?" San asked in a soothing tone, one which coaxed Ten into answering.

"I... Doyoung spoke with me the other day." Ten started. San nodded in an encouraging matter which helped Ten to continue.

"He said that in order for Taeyong to be able to go outside, I had to talk about his past." Ten shook his head, looking up to San with tears blurring his vision.

"I-I can't do that San."

"Why not?"

"Cause... cause I'm scared. I'm so fucking scared that it'll ruin what we built."

There, Ten had finally said it out loud. He finally said what he was too scared to talk about, instead of trapping it in his own head to eat at his brain.

San gave Ten a moment to try and recollect himself, before softly speaking.

"Ten, what do you think you and Taeyong have? A friendship? Partnership? Maybe even nothing at all?"

Ten nearly winced at the last suggestion. But he himself couldn't begin to think about the answer to San's question.

What are we?

"Friendship, Taeyong and I are friends." Ten decided.

Over the last few months, Ten started to see Taeyong as someone more than just a patient, and something told him that Taeyong could say the same. He strongly hoped he would at least.

San nodded, seeming to agree with Ten's answer. "So you don't want to ruin the friendship, but let me say this to you Ten. Taeyong needs you, and I know I'm not the only one that thinks that. Hell, I think everyone has stolen a glance at you two walking down up and down the halls to the shower."

Ten's lips quirked at the remembrance.

It'd become a routine, a tradition if you will. It started when the two were debating about which artist was more talented. Doyoung came to inform Taeyong that it was his time to shower. The two looked at each other, knowing then that neither of them wanted to leave the conversation that was being held. So Ten told Doyoung that he would walk Taeyong to the shower and back, not knowing that he would be doing that every time from then on.

"What I'm trying to say, is that while Taeyong needs you, he also needs to lift things like his past off his chest. But that doesn't mean you have to choose between one or the other. You should help him with his past, and be there as his shoulder to lean on."

Ten bit his lip and slowly nodded. It grew silent for a moment.

"But what if-"

"No buts! You don't know anything Ten, so you might as well assume the best of things."

Ten nodded for a second time.

Thoughts about the dream he had that morning came to his head.

I will focus on both.

****

Ten woke up later than usual that day, taking his time to get ready.

He was trying to stall going today.

He sat on the couch fidgeting with Taeyong's grocery bag from Utopia while mindlessly watching TV.

He had about an hour before his session with Taeyong. He jumped a little but when he received a call from Jungwoo. He stared at the caller ID and didn't accept the call until the last ring.

"Hey." Ten said.

"Ten? Have you left for work yet?"

Ten shook his head, before remembering he was on call and Jungwoo couldn't see him.

"No, I haven't."

"What? Why? You never take so long to go to work like this! Do you not feel well? Are you sick? Did you fight with your boss? Do you need me to take a day off? I'm on my way!" Jungwoo said determinedly. Ten was laughing on the other end at his brother's worriedness.

"Woo, calm down, I was just feeling a little tired today and needed a little more time before leaving."

It was silent for a moment, before a small "ah" was heard from Jungwoo.

"You're stalling."

"What- How the fuck did you know?" Ten gaped. Jungwoo's laugh rang in Ten's right ear.

"I know you Ten." After a moment, Jungwoo spoke again.

"Ten."

Ten hummed.

"It's going to be okay."

Ten looked down and nodded.

It's going to be okay.

****

Ten walked through the hallways of the hospital, clutching the bag in his right and wiping the sweat off his left with his pants.

He stopped in his tracks when he saw Doyoung come out of his office ahead. He met the other's eyes and Doyoung smiled and nodded encouragingly.

Ten slightly nodded back and continued walking.

When he approached Taeyong's door, he took a deep breath. He entered the code, flinching at the beep.

He slowly pushed the door open, peeking in to see Taeyong sitting on his bed as usual. He was looking out the window before Ten had entered, and now he stared right at him.

"Hey, Taeyong. I got you more stuff for your jaw." He smiled gently, holding up the bag.

Taeyong nodded and stood up, walking towards Ten. Ten held out the bag to Taeyong, who spoke while taking it.

"I found this artist that had a good song, not as good as the one I said before but it's way better than that shit you argued was the best." Taeyong said, throwing the bag to the bed.

If Ten didn't have something he was dreading to do, if this had been any normal day, he would've made a clever comeback and the two would've gone on debating for hours. But it wasn't like that, though Ten wishes it was. He closed his eyes, breathing deeply.

Taeyong's words became white noise behind the ringing in Ten's ears. He was dizzy with nervousness.

Focus on both.

Taeyong's words came back into Ten's reach just as he was about to break the ice.

"This one song is pretty good by them, but I still think that-"

"What happened to your father?" Ten asked, finally opening his eyes and looking up at Taeyong.

Taeyong's words came to a screeching halt as he froze.

Ten saw the shock on Taeyong's face, and while he immediately wanted to stop, to laugh and play it off as a joke, he knew he had to go through with it.

"What?" Taeyong asked.

"What happened to your father?"

"Why the fuck would you ask me that?" Taeyong asked. His face showed signs of shock and hurt but his eyes showed a darkness that Ten had never received.

"What happened to your father?" Ten asked again, this time taking a step towards Taeyong.

Please, Taeyong, just say it, just say what he did and this will be over. Please.

"Stop." Taeyong pleaded.

"What happened to your father?" Ten took another step forward.

"Stop!" Taeyong yelled harshly, his breathing rapid.

"What happened to your father?" Ten pushed away the tears threatening to escape. He couldn't cry now. He had no right to.

A step forward.

Taeyong, please, just say it, just once. Please.

"Ten, stop!" Taeyong shouted, his voice even louder than before.

His fists were clenched so hard, that his knuckles were completely white, and Ten could tell he was breaking the skin of his palms.

"What happened to your fa-"

"He was murdered by my fucking mom!" Taeyong roared.

He couldn't control it anymore and punched Ten in the face.

Ten stumbled back from the blow, ignoring the pain. What he couldn't grasp, what was a true punch in the face, were the words that Taeyong had said.

He looked up to see Taeyong's face filled with shock.

His eyes were filled with tears, something which Ten had never seen from him before. Taeyong was stepping back, ashamed of what he had done.

"I'm sorry." Taeyong said, his tears falling. Ten had never heard so much desperation in Taeyong's voice.

Ten came forward shaking his head.

"Taeyong, no, no, no, it's okay."

But Taeyong wasn't listening. He kept walking backwards until the backs of his legs hit the bed causing him to flinch.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please. Please don't leave me." Taeyong sobbed, covering his face with his hands. Ten's heart shattered.

"Taeyong, it's okay. It's okay." Ten called softly but frantically.

He came forward, gently grasping Taeyong's hands. He tried pulling them away from Taeyong's face, but the other resisted.

"Taeyong, it's okay. Hey, look at me."

Ten softly tugged at Taeyong's hands, this time meeting hesitancy.

He pulled Taeyong's arms forward, letting them go and wrapping his own arms around Taeyong's neck.

Ten soon felt arms slowly loop around his waist, and he pulled Taeyong closer to him. He shushed Taeyong gently while Taeyong still stood silently pleading.

"I'm sorry." Taeyong said again. His arms around Ten's waist pulled the shorter closer in desperation.

"Sh, it's okay, it's okay." Ten said whispered into Taeyong's ear. He tenderly ran his fingers through Taeyong's hair. He closed his eyes as tears escaped his own eyes.

They stayed like that for a while, until Taeyong's sobs reduced to silent sniffles. His cries were almost completely silent, and Ten wondered how many times someone could've easily missed them.

Taeyong started to sit on the bed, clutching Ten harder against himself in fear of losing him on the way.

Ten was trying to let go in order to guide Taeyong to sit down, but when Taeyong squeezed his waist as a sign of not wanting to let go, Ten nodded, shushing the worried older.

"I'm not going anywhere." Ten whispered.

Taeyong finally sat down completely, pulling Ten closer again, causing Ten to nearly stumble. He put his right knee on the bed next to Taeyong's waist. His foot was planted on the ground near Taeyong's thigh, almost completely straddling him.

Taeyong buried his head into the crook of Ten's neck, inhaling his comforting scent. The scent that Taeyong always smells when Ten hugs him. Ten continued to run his fingers through Taeyong's brown locks, lost in his thoughts.

"My father was murdered by my mother."

Taeyong, how long have you been suffering with this, Ten thought, pressing his forehead into the crook of Taeyong's neck as well.

After a few more moments, Ten spoke.

"Taeyong." He called out faintly.

Taeyong shook his head, rubbing his head against Ten's neck.

"Taeyong."

After a brief pause, Taeyong looked up into Ten's eyes.

Ten's heart broke at the sight of Taeyong's red and puffy eyes.

He gingerly cupped the man's cheeks, stroking away the dried tear streaks with his thumbs. Taeyong stayed unmoving.

"My legs hurt, may I please sit next to you?"

Taeyong shook his head frantically. Irrational or not, the thought of Ten leaving his arms even for a second scared Taeyong to an unbelievable extent.

"It'll just be for a second." Ten said, his left foot started to hurt from holding all his weight up.

Taeyong shook his head once again and mumbled something incoherent.

Ten was about to question what the other had said, but he cut himself off with a yelp as Taeyong lifted up Ten's left leg, his hand under his thighs. Ten would've fallen backwards if it weren't for Taeyong's other hand supporting his lower back. He clung to Taeyong's neck like a koala.

Taeyong rested Ten's legs on the bed around his waist, the other now fully sitting in his lap.

Ten's cheeks heated up at their position. He was scared that Taeyong could feel the heat of his face against his skin. But that didn't matter when he felt Taeyong's lips quirk against his neck.

Despite Ten's fluster, Taeyong's lap was comfy enough to relax after a while, breathing deeply and taking in the comfortable silence.

It wasn't until Taeyong shifted his shoulder against the younger's cheek, causing Ten to hiss in pain.

Ten had forgotten about the bruising wound on his cheek until that had happened.

Taeyong panicked and looked up at Ten's cheek, only to grow more worried as he saw the bruise.

"I'm sorry." Taeyong apologized again, looking sincerely into Ten's eyes.

Ten smiled softly and shook his head. "I should be the one apologizing, I shouldn't have pushed you like that, I'm so sorry."

Taeyong nodded as his own sign of forgiveness.

"It felt nice though... letting it out. I had never told anyone, moreover I couldn't." he admitted.

Ten stroked the side of Taeyong's neck in reassurance.

"My mother..., used to always read my sister a bedtime story. All these fancy books and fairy tales. I wanted that too. So I asked her... one night to read me one, and she just said she would. I... I was an idiot, for thinking I would ever get an actual bedtime story read to me by my own mother."

"You were a kid who just wanted a mother. That doesn't make you stupid, Taeyong."

Taeyong nodded in understanding and continued, fiddling with his thumbs behind Ten's back.

"My mother did tell me a story, but there was no book, no fairy tale, and no happy ending, a story she made just for me. At the time I thought I was special, but later I found out that couldn't be further from the truth. The story... was about a society that was split into two, the nobles, and the ignobles. The nobles had fame, money, power. They lived in grand mansions and castles and ate whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted. The ignobles got the leftovers, the scraps. They had torn clothes, little to no flesh on their bones, and they lived on grass if they were lucky.

I asked my mom why the ignobles were treated like that, why they were named worthless. My mother said that nothing necessarily made them worthless, their beings alone made them that way. But the people in the society thought it was because of the color of their hair, the color of their eyes, the color of their skin. Deep inside, however, they knew there was no real difference, the rich simply wanted to stay rich, and the poor were too afraid to speak out. So they lived as that forever, and nothing changed. I always thought it was an interesting story, and I always questioned the lesson it gave.

The lesson was one only for me, made by my mother. It was a warning, Ten, a warning that told me to keep my mouth shut from all the bad she did, to me, to our family... to my father."

Ten comforted Taeyong with the soothing backs of his fingers gliding softly across the skin of his neck. "Your father? You said he was murdered? Do you want to get that off your chest as well?"

Taeyong took a moment to question what swam in Ten's eyes. Whether it was judgement, hatred, resentment, but no, Taeyong saw nothing but unbridled affection, something he'd expected from the sweet and kind Ten. So, Taeyong continued.

"After my mom was declared arrested for bankruptcy, they sent cops to come and find her. I was sick a lot when I was little, this being one of the times, so I stayed home. I don't know if my mom had forgotten that, or if she just didn't care, but she was packing up her things to run away. My dad was trying to stop her so she can be properly arrested and serve her punishments. And so they fought, and I was there to see it when my mom grabbed a knife and slit his wrists. I felt... numb, I couldn't scream until my father fell to the cold floor. My mother looked at me and warned me not to tell anyone, or she'll kill me too."

Taeyong finished with a shaky breath, Ten's presence being the only thing holding him together at the moment.

Taeyong collected the tears off of Ten's face, one by one.

"Taeyong." Ten called out, burying his face into Taeyong's neck once again as he broke down sobbing.

"Shouldn't I be the one crying?" Taeyong joked.

Ten laughed messily, looking up and wiping his nose.

Taeyong couldn't help but smile faintly, something he can only seem to do around the smaller, when he made Ten laugh.

Ten inhaled, before speaking.

"There are good people in the world, Taeyong, no matter how much fame or wealth they have. Your mother got it wrong. In that story, if it was more realistic, someone, rich or poor, would realize the wrong in their society, and they would be brave enough to make a change."

He cupped Taeyong's face, planting a tender kiss on his forehead, making the other pull him closer.

"You're so strong, and anybody who heard this story too would see it."

Taeyong's ears grew red as he tried to shrug off Ten's praise.

"Do you... think you will tell the cops about this?" Ten asked wearily.

Taeyong shrugged. "I've come to terms about what happened, enough at least to not think about it that much. My mother is already in jail for life, what would the use be? It would just be an uproar for a while and then nothing else would really happen."

Ten nodded. "Do what you think is best, Yong."

Taeyong looked at the other with a questioning look. "Yong?"

"Yeah, that's my nickname for you. Do you not like it?" Ten said with a fake pout.

Taeyong smiled and shook his head. "No I... I like it."

He cuddled into Ten's neck again.

"I like it."

Ten smiled. His fear was growing apart from Taeyong, but he ended up growing closer.

Lee Taeyong.