Ten had never really experienced true pain.

Sure he's stubbed his toe, burnt his hand, but he never really felt the pain of losing a loved one, or feeling worthless. If he had to choose something he's struggled with, he'd probably have to say that he just feels lost. He found that being so untouched brought him to a feeling of emptiness, eating at him like an apple, yet never reaching the core. He didn't know what he wanted to do with his life. He never broke down because of this, or even cried, he just simply felt...

Lost

Call it what you want, he'd say, but he began to reflect on how his lack of suffering could help others.

He still vividly remembers his 15 year old self escaping to the empty school hallways during an assembly, and seeing the most broken looking boy he had ever laid his eyes upon in the bathroom.

The boy didn't seem to notice him, or maybe he just didn't care, but Ten used this time to take in the boy's appearance. The boy's light brown hair was tussled, either from the lack of care or a nervous habit of running his slender hands through it Ten didn't know. His uniform was wrinkled as well, but what really caught Ten's attention was the boy's sleeves rolled up, and a broken bottle piece in his hands, ready to cut his own life away like paper.

As Ten saw this, he immediately rushed to the boy's side and knocked the shard out of his hand, looking at him with such horror, but also with concern for the broken stranger he'd just met.

"What are you doing!?" he yelled. The boy just looked down and away, but Ten kept talking frantically. "Do you know how much you could've lost if you did this!?" Ten grabbed the boy's sleeves, startling the boy as he rolled the sleeves down, choosing to ignore the other various scars on his arm. The boy just stood there, trying to find his words.

They stood in silence, one that isn't uncomfortable, nor is it comfortable for that matter, but a silence that is needed.

"W-why are you doing this? Y-you don't even know me..." The broken boy finally asked. Ten simply stared dumbly at him. "Yeah so? Because I don't know you I should just let you ruin yourself?" Ten's volume lowered this time, looking sincerely into the boy's eyes.

And for the first time, the boy stared back into his eyes for more than 5 seconds, though his eyesight was becoming blocked by the wall of tears building up in his eyes. "B-but I... I'm no one..." the boy said as he slowly broke down.

He soon felt his body being surrounded by a warmth he'd never felt before, one that slowly compels his walls of tears to fall, to rack his body with sobs, to make him feel cared for, for once in his life.

He felt the warmth of being hugged. He finally registered that it was the other boy's arms giving him warmth, his voice whispering soft affirmations in his ears, telling him something he'd never heard in his life.

That he's not broken. Not worthless.
This went on for a solid 5 minutes, until the sobbing boy finally lifted his head from Ten's tear drenched shoulder, still clinging desperately to the foreign warmth. ​

How do you make friends? How do you make them without getting any bruises, then coming home just to receive more? The boy thought. He decided that the boy should at least know his name.

I think... I think I can trust him.

"I-I'm Jungwoo" he whispered, just barely loud enough for the shorter male to hear. He held his breath, ready for the hits to come flying his way. But the other's next actions surprised him.

"I'm Ten," he said, smiling wide.

And for the first time in years, maybe even his whole life, Jungwoo felt what he thought was a smile slowly grow on his face.

And Ten finally found out where he wanted his life to go. He wanted to help people. He wanted to show them that no matter who they are, they are not worthless.

The two boys later became best friends, always there for each other, to hear each other's rants, laughs, and thoughts. Jungwoo had begun to smile much more, and even laughed with him, which definitely caused Ten to be pleasantly surprised. He slowly started to open up, as he felt the burden on his shoulders was weightless enough to put it on his best friend's.

So, during their Junior year, Jungwoo went to Ten's house for one of their normal movie nights. While watching the movie, Jungwoo suddenly paused it, causing Ten to look at him curiously.

"Ten" Jungwoo called, suddenly becoming serious. Ten hummed, beckoning him to continue.

"I want to tell you... about..." he took a deep breath, something Ten had taught him to do to stop his habit of hyperventilating when he was nervous or anxious. "I want to tell you about me," He had managed to say.

Ten's eyebrows raised as he shot up to a sitting position. "Are you sure? You don't have to force yourself" he said, pushing down his eager want to know.

"No I... I want to tell you, since you were the person who saved me." Jungwoo smiled warmly, causing Ten to do the same.

That night, Jungwoo released his past like a bird he'd been nursing, saving its wings and letting it fly out into the world, out of its cage.

Ten learned how Jungwoo's parents had been illegal drug dealers, alway high and always fighting with each other. His mom died from overdose when he was 7, causing his father to spiral more than he already had. He began to yell at Jungwoo more frequently, which Jungwoo could tolerate, since he's gone through it all his life.

That was until it had gotten worse. His father would begin to beat his own son, calling him worthless. Jungwoo tried to endure this as well, blocking out the hateful words and painful bruises from his own blood, until he began to believe his father. He began feel like nothing. At the start of his 4th grade, he realized that he liked his friend, which would be acceptable to others, if his friend wasn't a boy. When Jungwoo finally gained the courage to give his well written love note with to his friend with shaky hands, he was disgusted with him, left him alone and spread rumors that he tried to kiss him. From there, Jungwoo could never make any more friends, always enduring the pain of the beatings at school and the ones at home.

He moved schools after his dad got the call from his teacher that he must, for the sake of his child, which the father cared nothing about. So now he found himself here, with a person he can truly count on and trust.

The night ended in Ten consoling his best friend, telling him none of it was his fault, and that he was worth so much more than he thought he was. Jungwoo always believed Ten should take a career path that helps others, because when he was under his caring words, he felt like he could breathe without feeling like he's taking oxygen he doesn't deserve from the world.

The two always had each other, through the rest of their high school and college years. Jungwoo had moved in with Ten's family, his father very easily gave Ten's family full custody, which made Jungwoo sad of course, to be so easily thrown away, but at the same time, he didn't complain. The two were then officially family.

****

"Damn, you'd think for a rich ass family, they would see the creepy door in their basement." Ten said mockingly. "True but it's also hidden really well" Jungwoo commented. "I guess" Ten replied.

8 years later, and the two still make time for their movie nights. Jungwoo barely manages to clock out early at the cafe he works at, and Ten's job hasn't had any action.

"Hey, did anything happen at work today?" Jungwoo asks. Ten groans, wanting to forget the hours of boredom, eliciting a loud laugh from Jungwoo.

"It's fucking ​awful." ​Ten rants, "There's nothing to do, my boss just says I have to wait to "find the right patient", but how long do I have to!? I've been waiting for a year, and I haven't been assigned ​one person!" Ten is now sitting up, the movie drowned out by his loud voice. Jungwoo gently puts his hand on Ten's shoulder and guides him back down.

"It's ok Ten, I'm sure there's a reason. Have you talked to your boss about it?"
"Of fucking course I have! All he says is that every patient has a therapist that is 'ideal' patient for them and I have to wait for mine?!" Ten sits up again, yelling. Jungwoo repeats the action to sit him back down with his hand on the other's shoulder.

"Well, your patient is coming, I can feel it! Fighting Haedawe!" Jungwoos yells. Ten sighs,

"I guess...but what the fuck was that?" Ten asked. Jungwoo was confused at first until he realized what he said. "Fighting Haedawe?" Ten clarifies, though Jungwoo does know, he's just trying to find a reason why he said that for himself.

"Uh yeah, this guy at my work keeps saying it to all the workers who start getting tired when it gets late." Jungwoo tries to say casually, but his best friend can see right through him, from the clear blush on his cheeks and the nervous chuckle at the end of his sentence, to him rubbing the tattoo on his right wrist, a habit he picked up when he was nervous.

Right when the two turned 18, Ten suggested Jungwoo get tattooed to cover up his scars. Jungwoo went with a large landscape of a desert that covers his forearm on the left arm, and a landscape the same scale as the other one of a jungle on his right. Ten and Jungwoo thought it was perfect. It's hard to tell just by looking, but it represented Jungwoo's journey. Stories are read from left to right, prompting the desert to be on the left. It represents his life before. In a desert, there's endless amounts of sand with nothing to see miles beyond with no water, paired with the scorching heat of the sun. Dry is the word to summarize it all. In a Jungle however, representing Jungwoo's life now, there's water falls, rivers, and life...

Life is the word to summarize it.

"What?" Jungwoo says as he watches a devilish grin grow on Ten's face. "Someone's got a crush~" Ten said in a sing-song voice. "I-I do not," Jungwoo said, although he knows he's been caught.

"Spill, what's his name, is he hot? Is he tall? Is he nice to you?" Ten started, his voice getting stern with the last question.

"Lucas, Yes,​ Yes, a​nd Yes" Jungwoo answered, his small smile growing into a full grown grin by the end. "Oh my god you're so whipped already." Ten teased just before catching the pillow Jungwoo threw at him, which led to a very intense pillow fight.

****

Ten got ready as usual. He ate his breakfast as usual, drove to work as usual, yet he couldn't help but feel this feeling in his head that a change was about to happen. Like the world suddenly shifted just for one day. Ten didn't know why he felt this, but it brightened his mood, so he wasn't complaining.

When he arrived to work he did his usual procedure. He greeted the nurses, took his cup of coffee the poor college intern had to make, and went to his boss' office.

"'Sup bitch" Ten said to Kun, who looked up and rolled his eyes at his devilish worker.

"Hello to you too, bitch" Obviously, this doesn't sound like what a worker would say to his boss, but they were really close friends.

"Is there something for me today?" Ten asked with a robot-like voice. It was like a routine for Ten to ask, though he never expects much, today is no different.

"Actually, yes" Kun said, taking out the papers, jumping from the shriek of surprise from Ten. He physically jumped in excitement, his heart racing. "Wait really!? If you're joking..." Ten said, his jumping ceased, suddenly going full threat mode.

"I'm not joking," Kun said, but his face didn't exactly say he was happy to assign Ten this patient, in fact he looked worried for Ten.

"Kun? Why are you giving me that face?" Ten asked wearily.

"Listen, Ten... this patient, there's a reason why no one wants to be assigned to him... He's... not exactly the... ​safest​ person to be around, so I want to be sure that you want this."
Ten stared at him. ​Could this guy really be that bad? Ten suddenly snorted.

"Kun, I've been waiting forever for this, don't think I'm backing down" he said sternly. ​Whoever this guy is... I can take him. He can't be that bad... right?

Kun gives him one last look, one that's asking Ten if he's sure, in which Ten eagerly nods. Kun handed him the papers. "Good luck Ten" he said. "Thanks..." Ten said. As he walked out of the office, he looked at the paper to see his location and basic info.

Lee Taeyong,

Age: 24
Diagnosis: Intermittent Explosive Disorder, Alcohol Addiction, Drug Use
Location: Room 127 Neo Hospital, Mental Disorder Wing.

Current Specialists: Kim, Dongyoung: Doctor; Leechaiyapornkul, Chittaphon: Therapist

Past Specialists: Choi, San: Therapist; Kim, Byeongkwan: Therapist; Park, Junhee: Therapist

Medication: Antidepressants, Mood Stabilizers
Notes: Patient is extremely violent, Frequent episodes

Damn, what am I getting into... T​en thought as he made his way to the Mental Disorder Wing. As Ten neared the room, he willed himself to calm down. ​Room 127​ he saw. He stood in front of the door, inhaled, and entered the given code to the room. Who the fuck comes up with our codes... Kick It? Really?

When he entered, he held his breath, the room wasn't a mess, but there were broken items laid in a pile. ​Interesting​. The walls were made of metal, but

Ten could see faint dent marks on one spot. ​Why is the damage in only one side of the room? What really took Ten's breath away was the man with brown hair sitting on his bed that he dragged to the small window, trying to look at whatever he could.

He didn't seem to notice him, or maybe he just didn't care. ​Deja Vu T​en thought.

"Excuse me," Ten said, hiding his fear behind his serious facade. Taeyong turned his head towards him, unmoving, then turned back to the window. "I'm Ten, I'm going to be your therapist from now on."

Taeyong scoffed. "What? Like the other ones?" he said, slowly rising from his bed and walking towards Ten, looking him up and down.

Ten forced himself to stay calm, ignoring his rapidly beating heart as the man slowly advanced to him.

"I'm fucking tired of this." Taeyong gritted, backing Ten against the wall. "When will these dumbasses take a goddamn hint"

Ten silently gulped, his mouth gone dry, yet he stood his ground.

Taeyong leaned into his ear and whispered, "What do you think you're gonna do? Huh? Change me? I could break you in half, you know that?"

Ten broke into a sweat, assessing his situation.

"Please step back" he found himself saying, thankful that it didn't sound like begging.

Taeyong stayed in his position for a while, before finally stepping back, and going back to his bed, catching Ten off guard.

"You're not going to change me, so just quit now," he said, looking out the window.

"I'm not gonna quit without trying." Ten said. Taeyong scoffed again, it seemed to be a habit.

"The others said that too, you must be worthless just like them" Ten tried not take it into heart.

Through all his studying and preparing for this day, he learned one important thing. ​

They don't say it because they mean it against you, they say it because they think they know that they can't be helped.​

Ten used this while studying to become a therapist. Others forget that patients are people who are there to be helped. They must tell the difference between an insult and a cry for help.

Ten silently watched as Taeyong didn't move, just sat at the window, his jaw continuously clenching and unclenching.

Lee Taeyong, I will try... I will try to help you find yourself.