Chapter 23: Talking to the Moon

"Fi hagat tethas ou matitelsh (Some things are felt, And not spoken)
Ouen git atloubha ana ma adersh (And when I want to say it, I can't)
Wi la wenta aamil taha baadi mana (And if you do it after I ask for it )
Atlubha ib amayenfahsh (Then there's no use)"

Talking to the Moon x Fi Hagat - Elyanna

(its on spotify! and youtube. This song inspired Leila's character, so please listen!)

Part II. The Fatality of Desire

🌓

"May I speak what is on everyone's mind?"

Leila did not stir as Jeongguk's voice ricocheted  around the domed council room, commanding all attention. The dark walls and large black oak table centered in the middle were paired perfectly with  the ghastly tension that seemed to permeate through the group.

The princess had expected nothing less than disapproval at her appearance in the council today.

Six men, including Jimin, stared back at her with varying levels of suspicion and distaste. Even Hoseok, who she had thought warmed up to her from his wine gifts.

She regarded the blatant stares with pride. It was what she wanted. A clear and open view of every person who might wish her harm. Mostly everyone. One thing she would never deny from her training, was to keep her enemies tethered to her. If they would move against her, she would move with them.

It seemed for a moment that Taehyung would carry on without acknowledging the man. The prince was dressed finely, in all black attire etched with traces of silver. The crown sat atop his head, the jewels shone like sea glass. Leila looked down at her own dress, a gray frock that trailed with buttons all the way to her neck and around it, in her attempt to seem drab in comparison to the man beside her as to not pull away more attention. 

"Prince Kim." Jeongguk repeated more forcefully, his voice deepening.

Leila looked up, eyes catching with the most hostile noble. His jewel framed gaze pierced her sharply, a bite of his own as he looked at her like she was the devil incarnate.

Her cheeks heated as Taehyung shifted to her right, though she tried to calm her reaction. She didn't need the men to think of her as a blushing bride when she wished to be legitimate before them.

She watched out of the corner of her eye as the prince leaned forward, hands gripping to the black oak as he leaned in, "Go ahead, Noble Jeon. I'm so unfathomably curious to know what plagues you."

They had practiced earlier, how the prince would handle push back. They settled on haughty arrogance, hoping to ignite insecurity in his higher court. His tone was quaint, but it was clear that Taehyung was not sincere. Anyone weaker would have stepped back.

Noble Jeon trudged forward, the leader for every other man that was too timid to speak despite their afflictions. Yoongi nodded in support, while Jin and Namjoon nervously looked around the room. Jimin had remained more quiet than usual, his head dipped toward the table.

"What is Princess Anvari doing here? Not that I object to the presence of women in general. Is it wise to place our adversaries in political circles?" The pierced noble treaded carefully, his dark eyes neutral as they trailed back to the prince.

Jeongguk was easily wiser than Garnett. Less impulsive, more calculated. Though he was not as composed when they were alone, he was sure to use her title and speak of her without malice to the prince. Who knew his place, which made him much more dangerous than those without tact who wished to harm her.

Leila felt the Queen scratch forward among the black and white squares. Ready to kick over a wounded knight, who would not fall so easily.

Let the games begin.

Taehyung took in a deep breath, feigning boredom as his gaze fell lazily around the room, "As you all know, I have diverted greatly from the previous king's, my father's expectations and ways of dealing with the curse. I ask you to be as honest with me as possible, as friends, and not as my political allies. Do you believe me to be wrong for choosing to treat her as an equal instead of my prisoner? My slave?"

She tried not to shudder at the use of language, the feeling of metal shackles brining her wrists. The air of a cold cell trickling up and down her neck. Laughter and flashing fangs mocking her as she was taken in front of a court room. She was not the daughter of the moon who had experienced it, but it did not arrest the visceral disgust she felt in her veins at the idea of them reveling in her predecessor's pain.

Taehyung had warned her of their ignorance. Only their parents had been to the spectacles that the king had arranged to torture Sorina. And of course, the young prince himself. His nobles were kept from the true horrors other than harvesting her blood.

It offered no comfort as Jeongguk once again broke the silence, his voice unwavering, "Yes."

The room fell into a silence only known to the dead.

Her next breath felt shaky, an inhale of the coldest winter. Freezing the blood in her veins, and turning her into gnarled and bitter branches. Jeongguk's gaze remained on the prince, gauging carefully his reaction. Every move they would make a spectacle.

She could see his mask stitching itself onto his face. Tying loose threads, and turning him to a practical ruler. His expression showed arrogance as well as boredom, as if the conversation were simply a waste of his time and a defiance against his rulership.

The prince's voice echoed as he raised his voice, "Well, I would like to remind you fools that the great immortal king is dead. His choices for the daughter of the moon led him into an early grave, and we could've all perished for his decisions. Would you all like me to follow suit?"

Jeongguk finally quieted, his eyes squinted in a frosty glare. The rest of the room stayed quiet, for any word in disagreement now would be treason. Leila tried to catch the advisor's eyes across the way, but he shift his gaze. Loudly he pulled out a seat from the large table, the would scraping against stone. As he plunked into the seat, he accidentally made contact with her.

She smiled wryly, her finger flicking by her side in the smallest wave. The young woman tried to ignore her wound when he lifted his brows in a questioning motion, his lips remaining set in a line. Leila shook off his countenance, knowing she'd pester him later to tell her his problem.

The prince slapped his hands on the table, mouth lifting at the corner in a way that made her remember what they felt like on her skin, "Right. So as friends, and not allies, I tell you this. My father went wrong when he underestimated his strength, and delusional in his hubris. He flaunted his abuse, while the previous moonchild bided her time to plot against us. If she had been more sane at the time of their murders, we could have all been hills of ash washed away by the ocean two years ago. Leila here is powerful, as you all have witnessed. I am not romantically involved with her. I am not daft, I am not ill, I am not weak, or seduced. She's better to be used for us, than to be used against us. Having her on our side instead of fighting us will keep us satiated and alive. She and I have the curse's pull handled, and there is nothing further than that between us."

The lies sounded sweet on his tongue, yet burned bitter on her mouth. The men nodded, looking between her and the prince. Jimin hid a snort behind his hand, and turned it to a cough. In particular, Jin, Hoseok, and Namjoon looked at her with contemplation, for they had witnessed his anger at the ball when Jimin bit her.

They needed to do more to convince them. These men weren't stupid, and Jeongguk looked like he was ready to protest. But she could see, from the subtle set of Taehyung's shoulders to his strained tone, it was brutal enough to denounce her from himself in front of everyone. To not claim her as his.

This time, it was Min Yoongi who spoke, his tone blasé, "But what does she have to offer here?"

Taehyung tensed further, his gaze catching her from her peripheral. Nerves pinched at her heart, her stomach as his closest advisors questioned him, her place there. She wanted to scream at him to not look at her, not now. But they hadn't carefully planned how to answer this question. Taehyung had once believed his speech and word would be enough. It was clear at the speculative atmosphere that it was not.

His expression seemed to fall as she stared forward not meeting his eyes. He stood taller as he addressed the room with the finality of his decision.

"She's been raised to be emotionless, and cunning. We could use that for our council, considering how many of you make decisions based of of how you feel, and not entirely what's most important. And I mean, she isn't terrible to look at, is she? It makes the rules I throw at you a little easier to swallow, with her pretty mouth saying it." Taehyung laughed dryly, cocking his head at his friends.

Her heart plummeted.

Oh, really?

As terrible and demeaning as his words were, it finally seemed to satisfy the group of 'noble' men. Even Jeongguk couldn't help but ease in suspicion, still cautious but placated as he sat back down in his seat while nodding.

Of course, the prince's disrespect of her convinced them.

Leila schooled her face, willing her nails to stop digging into her palms. As anger and embarrassment coursed through her, she wondered if she could do this. Her entire life, even when she was ostracized, she had been treated as important. Used, but useful. Being dismissed by a bunch of men, even under a falsity by her supposed lover, felt like another betrayal.

Tears pricked at her eyes as she tried to listen to Taehyung drone on about other plans, "Now, onto matters of importance. What is the situation for clean water being transported to outer villages? Have our filtration systems been compromised, or have our magic users been incapacitated? They are in charge of wells and water wheels."

They answered, but the words seemed to blur together.

I asked for this.

We agreed to this.

It will keep me alive.

Taehyung continued to talk, his face screwed up in concentration. Nothing like the soft man from this morning, who couldn't stop smiling. More like the man who ripped the idea of her world apart without a second thought.

Her throat grew tighter.

He did not mean it, you know that.

But no matter how much she reasoned with herself, it still hurt. The heart she believed that she never had. She hated herself more for letting it effect her.

Somewhere in the hour long meeting they held, she decided it was better when she didn't know of the prince's feelings. Because then she could make excuses. But now, now that they cut themselves open and bared their fears and wants to each other, his necessary deceit felt just as real as if he meant every word.

When the doors to the hall finally opened, she was the first one through them. Needing air. Space. Anything that was far away from them. From him. From the shame that burned like the summer season across her cheeks. She almost made it to her room before she heard him calling for her.

How naïve of her to forget he could out run, out maneuver, and overpower her at anytime. A man made of divinity and something else. The thought charred her throat and blurred her vision, making her quicken her pace to her chambers.

"Leila," Taehyung groaned out with a nervous laugh. When she didn't falter, his tone grew more serious like the staunch sound of stone under his boot, "Leila stop."

The princess halted, eyes closed. He walked close enough to her so that she could feel his soft, unrelenting heat. The gentle and sorry breath from his lips, making goosebumps rise on the back of her neck, for she had it placed into a bun for the council meeting.

If she had been the same woman she was when she arrived, walking away would have been as easy as breathing. With her frozen form, and the heart that already started to beat erratically she was once again shown why she was kept from her emotions. The numb escaped her when she needed it most, when he was at risk of tearing every defense she built for herself when it could kill them both.

But mostly, she did not want to cry in front of him. The last time they glittered and were another pretty reminder he made her feel things she shouldn't.

Leila bit her lip, replacing sadness with something easier to swallow. All emotions felt like a weakness now that they were new, but anger felt like gilded armor, "Fuck off."

"Ignis." His breath scattered across her neck in a sigh, the sound low. Contrite.

She could already see it. His hands tentatively lifting to her shoulders. An attempt at comfort and apology. But she didn't want his affection. She didn't know what she wanted, other than a fight.

"What? Are you sure I am not too horrible to look at to have a conversation?" Leila answered in a derisive manner, a mocking smile forming on her lips that felt more like a grimace.

The princess turned as the man backed away, wanting, no needing, to see his ember filled eyes. He seemed shocked, recoiled as he stood up straight. His eyes searched her own, whole body stiff as he lifted his chin to look down at her.

The crown upon his head mocked her as he swallowed harshly, his eyes narrowing with determination, "Don't do this. We decided this morning, Leila. To convince everyone by any means necessary."

Indignation fueled her as she stared longer at his divine face, the lithe but muscular tilt of his body. Already the panic in his eyes, as if he was afraid she'd run from him, forever out of reach. She tried to feel nothing when she looked at him. Grabbing onto the pit of ice and carnage that was her heart, "I didn't tell you to make me look like an undignified imbecile willing to be used by you. Or that you didn't find me attractive. You went too far."

It sounded terribly childish once she said it out loud, and her blush did not hide itself from him. Taehyung paused, looking her up and down as his eyes lit like the darkest gems. He stepped closer to her, lessening the gap she created. Leila seethed when he lifted his hand, his touch for once feeling cold as it trailed across her heated cheekbones. She deepened her frown, as Taehyung dipped his head lower so he could speak to her at eye level.

"Well I cannot possibly tell them the truth. That I was holding myself back from bending you over the table and have my way with you to rid that scowl off your face, now can I?" His voice ghosted across her lips, teasing before a smile made its way onto his face.

Leila shivered, his admission causing blood to rush in places it shouldn't. Trying not to focus on how just now he decided to be as forward and explicit as possible. And how he just casually said it as if it was always on his mind. She squeezed her thighs together and balled her fists, while feigning apathy.

Leila slapped his hand away, scoffing, "You must think because I haven't slept with anyone that you talking about fucking me at all will make me lose my wits. If you haven't gathered it by now Prince, my dignity is more important than anything you can offer me. More than your mouth, and more than the sick, depraved hard on that you're getting from me arguing with you."

The prince laughed arrogantly, "It makes me crazy when you lie about how much you want me. When you're so angry you start denying the way you crave me. Must I refresh your memory? You begged for my sick, depraved self this morning. Did you not?"

That spurred her silence.

No, this morning she had retrieved the poem from the prince. After finding out what straddling his lap and wrestling with him to get it would do. While he insisted they get ready for the council, she had insisted on other things. Though the moment was cut short when a knock on the door sounded, startling them to get ready for a meeting no matter how much they wanted to stay in bed.

"You are so full of yourself. I preferred you better when you had a stick up your ass." Leila stiffly responded, straightening her spine as she promised to never sleep in his room again. Not when it made him this haughty.

Taehyung's brows lifted, wondering where exactly she learned that phrase. Before shaking his head, a more serious expression taking over. One that made the tears want to spill over, as he regarded her carefully, "If this comes between us, I won't do it anymore."

Just like that? He'd end it, but at what cost? Losing his legitimacy as a ruler, not being able to protect himself or her. Her newfound feelings didn't matter in the grand scheme of what they needed to do.

Leila shook her head, frustrated she couldn't put what she felt into words, "I am being serious, and you're being dramatic. We can't give up now when it's just started to work. I just-"

The princess hung her head, looking at her hands crossed before her. She didn't want to see the look in his eyes, the pity she'd find their. They had kissed, and a little more. A curse tied their souls together, but she was nothing compared to what he spent his life preparing for. Ruling his people.

And yet, he lifted her chin with his thumb, causing their irises to meet. His voice so soft it petaled across her like peonies in the wind, in his eyes a soundless understanding, "Just know that every word that nips at you, stabs me. Every time I do something harmful, I see Sorina in your eyes. I see my father in mine. I hate doing this to you, talking to you in that way, making people think that you do not matter. I hate that you are right about this, but it will make our time of freedom so much easier. It will hurt both of us, maybe even break us. But I won't let you destroy you alone. Do what you do best, fight back. Give me your worst, I want it all. My court will find it more believable if we seem to both hold malice towards each other despite working together."

I can do this. We have to do this.

"You're right. You did what was necessary, and you were good at it. It is I whom has to come to terms with it. But be careful for what you allow Taehyung. I haven't had the chance to bite back yet, and I am much better at it."

Past events ran silently between them. While Taehyung had mostly ignored her, or minimized her importance, she had made public displays to humiliate him with his best friend and advisor. Had pushed him over the edge, and forced his hand in front of a filled ball room. Shown what little power he had over her when she almost stabbed herself with glass the first night.

Leila had done the most damage.

His face warred with two emotions. One showed regret for asking, the other excited by the prospect.

'Give me your worst' She had asked that of him yesterday, and he had given his best. His everything. And today, they had to pretend as if it didn't happen. She was so used to not feeling wanted by him, that today felt more real than what they experienced last night. Leila recognized the helpless feeling now, and would try to control it.

"How did you feel when I said those awful things. Tell me." Taehyung inquired, his face contorting uncomfortably.

She felt no need to lie, "Embarrassed. Ashamed.  Even though we want them to believe you have no interest in me, I have never felt more plain in my life. And I have never had my skills undermined because I am a woman, so that was a first. Powerless. I felt powerless."

The prince nodded, his answering attempt at a smile pained. He seemed to be warring with himself silently, as he often did. A trait she couldn't help from finding endearing as he paced in front of her, white teeth pulling at his curved lips. He must have reached a decision, as he stopped directly in front of her, eyes bright, "Thank you for being honest. It is my turn now I suppose."

"For what?" Leila asked dryly, tilting her head in question and resting her hands on her hips.

The prince smiled shyly, making her heart stutter. Another charm he hid behind his belt was an almost boyish coyness that hid under the statuesque elegance, "Let's make another deal. Every time I hurt you, I will tell you something about myself that makes me feel the same. It will be our truce, and my everlasting apology to you."

It should have felt right. Blood for blood, but it didn't. Instead, her chest felt heavy at the thought of him ever feeling the same way as her.

"I don't like the idea of you hurting."

The man shook the smile that started to form on his face from her admittance, causing her frown to deepen. Leila crossed her arms, and the prince laughed, his thumb reaching out to tap at her mouth before uncrossing her arms for her. Letting his hands rest gently above her forearms.

"I promise, it'll make me feel better knowing you have some hold over me. Please. I never want you to feel powerless because of me."

The princess sighed as he continued to stare deeply into her eyes, her tone light as she agreed to his terms, "I meant metaphorically. I could probably kill most people in this castle before you could take me down. But fine, I would feel flattered to help alleviate your guilty conscious. Tell me something that you can barely live with."

The man nodded, his smile disappearing. A new expression took its place, as he straightened away from her. Letting go of her flesh, and moving several places back. Leila watched, brow raised as the man began to pace once again and refused to meet her eye.

After several pauses, Leila opened her mouth to start speaking. But the prince's sharp intake of breath stopped her before she could. The confession blurting out behind it, "I wasn't lying last night, in the hall of mirrors. I didn't tell you about the amplifier at first because I would touch myself to the sound of you saying my name so that we often came at the same time. And then when I would see you later, I would be standoffish to hide from the fact that I was starving for you. That Leila, is what sick and depraved is, what is shameful and powerless."

The princess jerked her head up, just to see the prince's cheeks flare with red. He avoided her gaze still, coughing into his hands.

Unable to see the wide, wolf like happiness across her own, "Oh, oh you weren't teasing yesterday. You actually did that? Just from the sound of my voice?"

She'd thought it had been something to say in the heat of the moment. But now his sheepish behavior when he had first told her about it made sense. Especially when she accused him of hiding something from her.

"Yes." The prince replied begrudgingly, the blush dancing to his neck.

Her chest warmed with satisfaction. He wanted her badly, even before the kiss. Well before she even knew she wanted him more than the dreams. Leila guessed by the way he refused to meet her eyes this information was monumentally bruising to his stoic ego, the one where he pretended no one could effect him.

She'd never seen him so flustered before. And now, it seemed more than enticing for it to happen again. It was usually she who was left off kilter by their interactions.

The princess leaned forward, tilting her head back to force eye contact, "I thought you were going to bring up how you came without touching you. And after some thinking, that isn't quite normal for an adult man is it?"

Taehyung's mood turned to char, "Leila..."

The twenty-two year old continued in a coquettish manner, "You're right prince. I think this is a great way to keep the dynamics between us balanced. Keep insulting me in front of the castle, in front of the whole world. I might enjoy being degraded eventually, when you're the one whimpering for my attention behind closed doors."

The prince's eyes flashed, his jaw setting in a way that made her want to run in the best way possible. His lips settled in hidden amusement, "Be careful now."

"How can I when I am having so much fun." Leila replied, nudging him with her shoulder before moving away.

Taehyung's eyes trailed over her, landing on her lips before biting his own subconsciously. He shook his head a little to clear his thoughts.

"We still have to meet sometime, if you aren't too upset with me." Still, his voice came out gruffly. Like he was thinking about anything but the poem.

Leila rolled her eyes, letting her hand trail across his chest. She watched his breathing hitch as she pretended to pick a loose thread off of him, "As long as we actually decipher the poem, or finish yourself off before I get to you. And you don't think about bending me over your desk. You're forgiven."

Before she could protest, he pulled on her arm so that she landed on his chest. Leila lifted her head to yell at him when his lips came crashing down on her own.

She moaned embarrassingly as he massaged his lips own onto her own, beginning to know her. To mold to her, and to trace his tongue along her just where she liked. The pace was slow, passionate as he if he were unlocking more than just her mouth. The smooth surface of his flesh made her skin tingle, skin meeting skin. The prince wrapped both of his arms around her waist, bringing her impossibly closer as she gasped into his mouth. The man groaned happily, using his tongue to slowly prod her own. Her heart pretty much imploded when he nipped her gently on the bottom lip, his eyes dazed as he pulled away.

Taehyung whispered softly, "No promises Ignis."

The man smiled deviously, letting go of her waist and kissing her one more time on the forehead. Her mouth dropped open, brows furrowed at the action. She'd never had that type of kiss before. He shook his head at her reaction, lifting his hand to place a stray wave that fell from her updo behind her ear. Taehyung's eyes were wide with something she didn't understand, an expression so open and yet only silence filled the space between them. Every time his lips opened, she expected him to speak or kiss her again. Yet neither happened.

The prince turned without another word, walking down the hallway from her quickly.

Leila hid her laugh, quickly stepping into her chamber doors. Her heart beat wildly, as giddy as a mare as she stayed planted against the iron. Her heart escalated further when she saw a large wooden box in the middle of the room, her name etched into the top.

Her laughter halted as she moved forward, unsure if it was a new dress shipment or some sort of trick from Jeongguk. Him losing in council today wouldn't go easy, and planting something in her room through a servant would be a viable way to murder her. She carefully moved closer, knocking on the large wooden box once. Twice. The heavy thunk told her it was filled to the brim. Leila took a deep breath before crouching down to inspect the front. There she found a heavy metal latch, and slowly turned it to unlock the box. She lifted herself with the heavy lid, grunting as it fell over the top to reveal...books.

Lots of books. And not just any kind.

A piece of parchment lay on the top, scrawled with a beautiful yet clumsy rendition of Farsi.

'So that you have more ideas to attempt with me

-Your Faithful Enemy'

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
(A/N: Sorrryyyyy I have been exhausted. I promise I pretty much have this story planned out so don't worry that I will quit on it, because that is not happening. But fair warning it might end up being pretty long :)

How is the tea in this chapter? The drammmaaa we love it.

As you can see I hate when the couples "get together" and all the tension they had went away. No uh that is not going to happen here. Enemies to lovers? More like enemies to enemy lovers that will do anything for each other even if it hurts other people YESSSSS!!!!

Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: AzTruyen.Top