I only dare to breathe again when Fiesi slumps to the dirt. The look on his face when he saw me is seared into my memory, pinning me in place. Every inhale catches in my throat; I wrap my arms around myself, shaking.

Hatred. That had been pure hatred, blazing in his bright blue eyes brighter than his fire ever could. And it had burned far worse, too.

Coward, a part of me hisses. Even when Fiesi had attacked Asher, I couldn't breathe, let alone move. I should've done something. But I'd hidden in the shadows instead, desperately hoping that they could shield me. That, if I disappeared, everything else would as well.

Then again, what could I have done? I clench my hands, fighting the urge to tear away the silky barrier of my gloves. Unleashing my flame would have only resulted in more death. And without it, I'm worse than useless. Fiesi has already managed to show me that.

"Nathan?"

I drag my gaze upwards and meet Asher's. He's leaning against the spear for support, exhaustion still lingering in his expression. Shame schorches through my chest again, and I force my hands back down to my sides. I shouldn't be worrying about myself, not after what he's just done for me. Clearing my throat, I lift my eyes to his. "Are you okay?"

"Me?" Asher's brow furrows. "Yes, I'm fine. Are you?"

A jerky nod is the most I can manage. I flex my fingers, still not used to the fabric that bunches around them, and glance at Fiesi. The arrogance and rage have vanished yet again, wiped away by the peaceful facade of sleep. It's disarming.

With a soft sigh, Asher bends down and rummages through the rest of Fiesi's bag. The chains that had been inside catch my eye agan, and a lump forms in my throat. Had they been for me?

"Well," Asher finally says, his eyes roaming over whatever else must be inside. "It's something." With that, he shoves the metal links inside, ties it shut, and slings the bag over his shoulder. He glances at me. "So... where to?"

Where to? I swing my head around, trying to place the dim silhouettes of the mountains around us. I know where I don't want to go: back. There is nothing there except a broken castle and its conquerors. I swallow and point in the opposite direction. "That way."

Asher tilts his head. "You have no idea where to go, do you?"

"No," I admit, letting my hand fall back to my side. My stomach twists.

"Don't worry." The corner of Asher's mouth tilts into a smile, and he lifts Fiesi's spear. "I never do, either. Let's go."

He starts forward, following the path I'd created with my finger. I glance over my shoulder, my eyes snagging on Fiesi yet again. A dull pain thuds in my chest. He was never my friend. He was using me.

So why do I still feel this way?

"Will he be okay?" I ask, failing to smother the worry in my voice.

Asher hesitates beside a tree, half-lost in the shadows. His gaze flicks to Fiesi. "I think so. The fire will be going for a while. He'll stay warm enough."

Warm. I tear my attention back to Asher and move forward, hugging my arms to my sides. "Alright."

Asher falls into place beside me, and we swiftly leave the clearing behind. There's a long silence; I find my gaze roving between the trees and then the sky, picking out the stars and moon. The air pricks at my skin, but the chill doesn't bother me. If anything, it helps me feel a little more like myself. I lift my head, relishing the feeling of wind brushing against my cheeks. It's still such a new sensation.

"So, about this mission of yours..." Asher's boot scuffs across the ground, kicking up a small cloud of snow. He glances at me from the corner of his eyes. "A girl, huh?"

Suddenly, it's not that cold anymore. I wrench my eyes away, an uncomfortable heat creeping up my face. "Yes."

"And you said she was different from everyone else?"

"Yes." A trickle of warmth leaks into my heart, and I can't quite hide the smile tugging at my lips. "She... visited me. Told me about the outside world. It was like she knew everything."

Asher hums. "What was her name?"

"I, erm..." I glance at the ground, the moment of happiness falling away. "I don't know. We never used names."

"You... oh. Right. You didn't have one," Asher realizes.

I tug at the cuff of my sleeve, biting my tongue. Even now, I'm not sure what my true title is. Anathe? Noli? Nathaniel? It's ironic: I've gone from none to far too many.

After a moment, Asher continues. "How are you planning to find her, then?"

The question, so innocently placed, drives ice through my veins. How can I find her? Worry gnaws at my stomach, and my flame hisses in my ears. I have no name, no location, nothing. I wouldn't even know if she was dead.

I shake my head sharply, trying to jerk the thought from my mind. I would know. I'd have to. Scouring my memories, I look up at Asher. "She's a soldier. If I can find where they went after Polevis fell, I can find her. I will," I add, determination rising to sharpen my voice.

Asher looks away, a sad smile tugging at his lips. "You must really love her."

Just like that, the heat floods back to my face. "I..."

"It doesn't have to be that type of love," Asher snickers. "There's also the love of a brother, or a friend."

Love. The word echoes in my ears, utterly foreign. I know what it is, but I've never applied it to myself. Never to her. Just thinking about it worsens the warmth in my cheeks, and it rises to my ears and nose. I quickly bring a hand to my face, half-covering it.

"But," Asher continues innocently, "it could still definitely be the other kind. The famous love story kind."

Now my cheeks are definitely hot. I glance up at Asher, lost for words, and then quickly duck my head again. A groan slips past my lips as he laughs, and I twist my hand to hide more of my face. "Stop."

"Alright, alright." Asher's chuckles fade away, but he's still smirking.

I slowly lower my hand, feeling as if my entire head is burning. The crisp air rushes forward to help cool me down; I tip head back gratefully, trying to calm the fire whirling around my chest. It doesn't matter. She's my girl, and I'm going to find her. Anything else can wait.

Anything.

><><

Well, well, well. Look who did not forget her side project :D

Anyways, this is a quick little scene so I can add some direction to the rest of the plot. It's short and sweet, but I'm very glad to finally have it out! Especially since it means I get to be very mean to Fiesi in the next chapter.