Hanahaki. I've heard of that. It's when someone coughs out flowers because of unrequited love. I always thought it was fake. The concept seemed preposterous. Hacking up flowers because someone didn't love you the way you loved them? Rubbish.

Or so I thought.

One day I was feeling ill. I didn't look so and so I went to school with my other friends.

During class I saw my good friend Kokichi Oma pass a note to the one and only Kaede Akamatsu. I wasn't sure what it had said, but Kaede seemed annoyed, considering she crumpled it up and threw it to the floor. It was probably some sort of taunting message of sorts, something that Kokichi knew annoyed Kaede. He looked smug after she slammed the note into the ground.

After class I saw Shuichi Saihara holding a wrinkled piece of yellow paper, most likely the note that was passed to Kaede. His eyes dilated after he turned the note around and read the back. He seemed quite surprised and flustered.

The note fell from his hand, and out of curiosity I dawdled over and lifted it up. On the note the words, “Sup, Kayayday” were written. I then understood why Kaede was annoyed. But, like Shuichi did, I turned over the note to see what was on the other side, what could've surprised the Ultimate Detective as much as it did. Written on the other side was “Leave her,” with Kokichi's name signed at the bottom.

A not-so-subtle hint he had given Shuichi, that was. Shuichi was in a relationship with Kaede, and Kokichi had feelings for Shuichi, although he was not to tell me this yet. I knew he did though, as I know him better than many. He was attempting to tell Shuichi to dump Kaede so he could be with him.

But that would be good for more than just Kokichi.

I myself had feelings for the other half of that relationship: Kaede Akamatsu. Her beautiful blonde hair, her soothing voice, her deep, lavender eyes, her gentle personality. Everything about her infatuated me.

I was not one to try to split them up just for my benefit. But I could dream.

I wanted to be with her more than anything. But I could sense her pure love for Shuichi, and I didn't want to ruin that.

My ailment spiked me and I coughed violently. A few heads turned my way and saw me coughing as I held a note in my hand. My eyes squeezed shut.

Eventually my coughing seized and I felt marginally better. But I immediately fretted when I saw the note in its new state.

It was coated with pink ichor, with some sakura petals sprinkled in.

I straight away realized what happened. I coughed out that blood, those petals.

I was ill because I had that disease I always presumed to be false.

I had hanahaki.

And knowing I had it hurt more than anything.

Kokichi speculated it was fake, since he never had a trace of it and he felt Shuichi did not return his feelings. But a part of Shuichi had feelings for him, which was what left Kokichi unharmed.

I however, had no luck. Kaede never thought of me in a romantic way. She never considered dating me. I'm sure she never thought of me at all. And now, because of this, I had hanahaki.

If Kaede grew to return my affections, I would overcome the disease and my life would return to normal, or I could surgically get it taken out of me, but that in turn would eliminate my feelings for her. I didn't want that.

But if neither of these criteria were met, I was to die. The roots of the sakuras would crush me and tear me down, and I would suffocate.

I wiped the blood off my face and threw the note to the ground. I headed to my next class like nothing happened. But I saw Kaede down the hall. I caught a glimpse of her face, a gorgeous smile spread across it.

I instantly began to cough again.

When I looked at my hand, there was more blood and petals.

Dammit, I cursed internally.

I shook my hand around and knocked away the petals and sent my blood sprinkling everywhere.

Nobody even noticed the petals on the floor.

I decided to go into the bathroom to make sure I looked decent. I looked in the mirror, blood dripping from my mouth, my avocado-green hair askew, my eyes bulged.

I stroked my hair into place and wiped my mouth. I blinked a bit until my eyes sunk a bit back into their sockets, and exited the bathroom.

How was I going to deal with such a horrible illness? I couldn't tell anyone. I couldn't let Kaede find out. What would I do?

I continued to head to my final class of the day and soldiered through it. I avoided eye contact with Kaede throughout the whole period.

Kokichi leaned over to me, grinned, and asked how I was doing. I said I was well. I hoped he wouldn't see my lies. Ironically.

He surprisingly said nothing of it, gave a thumbs-up, and turned forward again.

After I made it through the class, I gathered my things and stood up.

A feminine voice that sounded too familiar said hello to me.

I felt something rise in my throat and I turned around. Speak of the devil, it was Kaede Akamatsu. The person I wanted to see the least.

“How are you, Rantaro?” she asked. “I'm glad the day's over.” She smiled at me. A smile that went through my eyes and into my heart, pulling the petals up inside me, wanting to spill from my lips and onto the floor.

“Me too,” I replied. I was afraid to speak. I smiled back at her, hoping there was no blood in my teeth.

“You have a nice smile,” she said to me, and then she left.

I trudged out of the room as well. She noticed nothing wrong with me, thankfully.

When I was sure she was gone, I let out the petals. I coughed more and more. I fell to my knees and continued to cough.

Nobody was there to witness this. Thank the skies above.

I decided to lie on the floor to recover a bit. I sighed deeply.

I hated sakura blossoms from that day forward. They reminded me of my pain.

Hanahaki. What I thought was a myth. What I thought was impossible.

It was real. It was possible.

And I loathed everything about that.