chapter 34: Sadness

Days had crawled by since the will reading, and now it was back to the grind--school time again. The holiday break was a chaotic blur, but reconnecting with my friends brought a sense of normalcy. I got to school early today because I needed to talk to Adam. I owed him an apology for how I lashed out when he was just trying to help. I hoped he could forgive me.

I waited for what felt like forever. Then, I saw him outside the classroom. He saw me too, but immediately turned and walked the other way. That hurt, but I wasn't about to chase after him--at least not yet. I knew we had to talk today, no matter what.

Back in the classroom, I decided to wait for Karissa and the girls. They showed up almost immediately, which was a huge relief.

"Thank God you guys showed up," I blurted out.

"Dena, what's going on?" Karissa asked, sensing my distress.

"Are you okay?" Jaelee and Xalia asked in unison.

"I'm fine, but I need to talk to Adam, and he's dodging me," I admitted, feeling frustrated.

"Oh no, I think it's our fault," Karissa said, looking guilty.

"We're so sorry, Dena," Xalia said, her voice soft.

"We truly are," Jaelee added.

"It's not your fault. When my grandma died, I turned into a total nightmare. That's what drove us apart," I explained, feeling the weight of my own words.

"I get it, but even if you had an attitude, he should have given you space instead of running away," Karissa said, her voice sharp with disapproval.

"Absolutely," Xalia agreed.

"I yelled at him, guys," I confessed, the memory still fresh.

"So what? You were hurting, and he should have understood that," Jaelee said, unwavering in her support.

"I don't know," I sighed, feeling uncertain.

"He'll come around. Don't stress too much, okay?" Karissa said, giving me a confident smile.

"Okay," I nodded, hoping she was right.

The girls tried their best to cheer me up, and just then, Adam walked into the classroom. He slumped into his seat, head on his desk, clearly exhausted or just not wanting to deal with me. I get it. The bell rang, signaling the start of the day. Today's agenda was all about writing a killer essay for college applications, something I was actually excited about.

Mrs. Murg stepped in, brimming with her usual enthusiasm. "You've got this!" she proclaimed, setting the tone for our session. She told us to start drafting our essays, promising we'd read them aloud for grading. I was confident—I knew I had this in the bag.

As we settled down to write, I quickly conjured up my ideas and penned them down. Time flew by, and soon it was time to present. One by one, we went up and shared our essays. Each one was impressive in its own way.

The session ended, and since graduation was just around the corner, we were dismissed early. As everyone packed up, I saw Adam bolt out of the classroom. I couldn't let him slip away again—I had to talk to him.

"Adam, wait, please!" I called out, chasing after him.

"Why are you following me?" he snapped, barely turning to look at me.

"I want to apologize for how I acted. I'm so sorry," I pleaded.

"You were mean for no reason when all I wanted was to help you. It's too late for apologies now," he retorted, his words cutting deep.

"Please," I begged.

"No. Leave me alone. What we had is over," he said coldly, walking away.

His words hit me like a punch to the gut. I stood there, feeling like an idiot, realizing he didn't want anything to do with me anymore. I had to accept that, no matter how much it hurt. After a moment of standing in shock, I slowly walked to my car and drove home, sadness weighing heavily on me.

When I got home, I collapsed onto the couch, replaying everything that had happened with Adam in my mind. It was all over now.

I eventually drifted off on the couch, exhaustion taking over. When I woke up, I trudged to my room to finish my college essay. I sent it off immediately, crossing my fingers for an acceptance letter. I mean, why wouldn't they want me? The girls and I had our hearts set on the same university, and I couldn't bear the thought of us being separated.

The week dragged on, and suddenly it was Saturday—the day of Grandma's funeral. There's no way to describe how I felt; words fell short. I just hoped the day would fly by. I took a long, hot shower and slipped into a sleek black dress. I did my hair, but skipped the makeup. What was the point? I knew I'd be crying rivers anyway.

Descending the stairs, I spotted my mom sitting on the couch, looking as heartbroken as I felt.

"Mom, are you okay?" I asked, my voice gentle.

"I'm okay, sweetie. It's just hard to accept that Mom is gone. Making peace with it seems impossible," she replied, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"I understand, but you know Grandma wouldn't want you to be sad forever. She'd want you to find happiness, for all of us to move forward," I said, trying to offer some comfort.

"I don't know how to do that right now," she admitted, her voice breaking.

"One day at a time, Mom. Eventually, you'll understand what I'm saying," I assured her, hoping she believed me.

I wrapped my arms around Mom as she started to cry. She'd been through so much, just like me. One thing was certain—I'd never leave her side. I vowed to make her happy every day, even though she didn't know how to find that happiness right now. The girls arrived at the house, all dressed in black with flowers in hand. Seeing them, I couldn't hold back my emotions any longer. Tears streamed down my face, and they joined me in crying, Mom included.

Eventually, we gathered ourselves and acknowledged that Grandma was in a better place now. With heavy hearts, we left the house and headed to the church. As we arrived, it was clear Grandma had been dearly loved—cars lined the streets, and people stood outside the church.

"So many people are here," Xalia remarked.

"Grandma was loved by many, so it was expected," I replied softly.

Mom teared up again and suddenly rushed out of the car. Aunt Jenna, always the supportive sister, quickly went after her to console her. I parked the car, and we all made our way inside the church. The ceremony was moving until Grand Aunt Lila began sobbing and shouting Grandma's name, behaving as if she'd lost her mind. She made her way to the altar, causing a scene. Enough was enough, and the congregation finally had it with her. They literally picked her up off the floor and escorted her out of the church.

Now it was time to lay Grandma to rest. Watching her casket being lowered into the earth brought tears to my eyes. I felt lost, unsure of how to cope. Grandpa hugged me tightly, reassuring me that it was okay. But I noticed something surprising—Grandpa wasn't crying. His face showed no emotion, yet I knew beneath that facade, he was struggling.

I admired his strength. Despite his grief, he remained composed, a pillar of resilience. As Grandma's burial concluded, we stood together, our hearts heavy with loss yet united in our love for her. The day wore on, filled with somber moments and memories shared among family and friends.

Back at home, the atmosphere was subdued. We gathered in the living room, memories of Grandma filling the air. Mom sat quietly, her eyes red from crying. I sat beside her, offering silent support. The girls surrounded us, their presence a comfort in the midst of sorrow.

"Dena, your grandma was amazing," Karissa said softly, breaking the silence.

"Yeah, she really was," Jaelee added, her voice trembling with emotion.

"We'll miss her so much," Xalia murmured, tears welling up again.

I nodded, unable to speak, overwhelmed by the enormity of our loss. Grandma had been the heart of our family, her absence leaving a void none of us knew how to fill.

As the days passed, life settled into a new rhythm. Mom found moments of peace amid her grief, slowly learning to navigate life without Grandma. I leaned on the girls for support, and they leaned on me. Together, we faced each day with strength and resilience, honoring Grandma's memory in our own ways.

Adam remained distant, and I respected his need for space. My focus shifted to finishing high school strong, cherishing the time with my friends, and supporting Mom through her healing process. Every day brought new challenges, but we faced them together, our bond stronger than ever.

Through it all, I couldn't help but admire Grandpa's stoicism. He continued to be a rock for us all, his unwavering strength a testament to the love he held for Grandma. We shared moments of laughter and tears, finding solace in each other's company.

Life moved forward, albeit with a noticeable absence. Yet, in our hearts, Grandma's spirit lived on, guiding us through the darkness and reminding us of the enduring power of love and family.

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